A/N: Sorry about the Quotes, in Word when I save it as a html it does this
on ff.net. If you know how I could possibly fix this leave me a note in the
reviews. I have raised the rating to PG-13 because of the cursing, and it is
somewhat angsty. I hope you like it and I apologize for any grammatical
errors.
Chapter 4
Severus stirred on his couch, and opened his eyes to find Stryker laying on his chest.
"Get off you lazy fool." He said sleepily. Striker opened his eyes and hopped off onto
the floor and went back to sleep.
"I wonder what time it is." Severus said as he walked towards his desk which held his
clock.
"6Õoclock in the evening! What on earth did I do to be so tired?" He wondered. He
walked over to the bathroom and closed his potions cabinet, so he was staring himself in the
face in the mirror. He turned on the faucet and splashed his face with cold water. His
hands stopped on his face, tracing them down his forehead to his chin. He shut his eyes,
and hit the mirror with his hand. Instantly the pieces of glass entered his left hand. Cursing
out in pain he ran his hand under the water, and watched as the blood ran down the drain.
He had gone through more mirrors this way.
After he had washed away most of the blood, he removed the pieces of glass, and rapped his
hand in the hand towel laying on the counter. He had left his wand in the HeadmasterÕs
office. He hated himself, looking in the mirror he saw the truth, he saw the past that haunted
him.
"Black doesnÕt know shit!" Severus cursed. It was times like these when he lost his
eloquence with words and reverted back into his 11 year old self. He hates to admit it but
his school day fights and confrontations with Potter and Company were nothing compared
to the pain and anguish he went through after leaving Hogwarts. Black had no clue what he
had gone through and he would rather die than to tell him the truth, because the truth was
simply humiliating.
"Stryker stay here, I will be back later." Snape hissed. He made his way to the door and
slammed it shut as Stryker jumped up in terror.
"Twizzle Figgs!" Snape shouted at the gargoyles that guarded the HeadmasterÕs door.
Slowly the gargoyles moved, and the staircase appeared. With his hand covered in a bloody
rag, he made his way up to retrieve his wand.
"Severus?" Albus questioned as he saw him enter through the door. He glanced down
and saw his hand, and gave a disappointed look.
"Not again Severus? That I believe is the 10th mirror you have broken." Albus said as he
approached him.
"What I do on my own time is my own business." Snape sneered.
"Inflicting pain on yourself is not healthy Severus." Albus said as he motioned for the
PotionÕs Master to sit down.
"I do not do it intentionally, you know that." He said as he looked down at his feet.
"You cannot change the past Severus, you know that. You must move on."
"How can I when I am constantly reminded! "
"You must tell yourself that you did the best you could and move on, that is all."
"It is not that simple."
"I know Severus, why else would you be struggling with this for 25 years now."
"Yes, I do not need reminding." He said taking his wand in his hand and unwrapping the
soiled cloth.
"Give me your hand, you were never good and healing yourself." Albus smiled. Severus
obeyed and pushed up the sleeve of his robe. Albus wrapped his hands over SeverusÕs and
whispered an ancient spell, and instantly his hand was no longer bloody and broken. Albus
looked down and starred at the arm where the dark mark once occupied.
"Funny, how we doubt the past, waiting and wondering what will be next." Albus said
letting go of SeverusÕs hand.
"I live in the past, you of all people know that."
"I know, pity really, if you could just find a nice woman and settle down." At this Severus
gave the Headmaster a queried look.
"So I suppose you and the Hat are in this together?" Severus questioned.
"What makes you say that? This gift exchange is merely a festive activity, to get the faculty
involved." Albus eyes twinkled.
"So, letÕs just say that this is not another excuse to get me and Granger together, what
would you get her?" He questioned knowing that Albus was lying.
"Ah, so you donÕt know what to get your Secret Santa? Well, I did happen to notice that
Miss Granger spends quite a bit of her time in the library."
"I am not blind, Albus I know she spends all of her time with her nose in books, but
perhaps she would like something else, something different." He rose his eyebrows.
"Ah, I knew my plan would work." Albus said.
"Ah ha, I caught you, I knew this was another useless attempt to get me to get to know her.
Well I will tell you this right now. I have not, and will not love another woman! I will not
put myself at risk again!" He shouted.
"Severus, really donÕt you think you should move on. Adolyn would have wanted you to be
happy, in fact I know it." Albus said as he looked at the saddened man in front of him.
"Forgive me Headmaster but you donÕt know shit, so piss off, and stop trying to help me.
No one can help me!" He yelled as he walked off in anger.
"No, Severus I cannot help you, you must help yourself before it is too late." Albus said
to himself.
"I think it is time for me to take a visit to Hogsmeade." Albus said as he threw some floo
powder into the fireplace and stepped in.
"RosmertaÕs!"
on ff.net. If you know how I could possibly fix this leave me a note in the
reviews. I have raised the rating to PG-13 because of the cursing, and it is
somewhat angsty. I hope you like it and I apologize for any grammatical
errors.
Chapter 4
Severus stirred on his couch, and opened his eyes to find Stryker laying on his chest.
"Get off you lazy fool." He said sleepily. Striker opened his eyes and hopped off onto
the floor and went back to sleep.
"I wonder what time it is." Severus said as he walked towards his desk which held his
clock.
"6Õoclock in the evening! What on earth did I do to be so tired?" He wondered. He
walked over to the bathroom and closed his potions cabinet, so he was staring himself in the
face in the mirror. He turned on the faucet and splashed his face with cold water. His
hands stopped on his face, tracing them down his forehead to his chin. He shut his eyes,
and hit the mirror with his hand. Instantly the pieces of glass entered his left hand. Cursing
out in pain he ran his hand under the water, and watched as the blood ran down the drain.
He had gone through more mirrors this way.
After he had washed away most of the blood, he removed the pieces of glass, and rapped his
hand in the hand towel laying on the counter. He had left his wand in the HeadmasterÕs
office. He hated himself, looking in the mirror he saw the truth, he saw the past that haunted
him.
"Black doesnÕt know shit!" Severus cursed. It was times like these when he lost his
eloquence with words and reverted back into his 11 year old self. He hates to admit it but
his school day fights and confrontations with Potter and Company were nothing compared
to the pain and anguish he went through after leaving Hogwarts. Black had no clue what he
had gone through and he would rather die than to tell him the truth, because the truth was
simply humiliating.
"Stryker stay here, I will be back later." Snape hissed. He made his way to the door and
slammed it shut as Stryker jumped up in terror.
"Twizzle Figgs!" Snape shouted at the gargoyles that guarded the HeadmasterÕs door.
Slowly the gargoyles moved, and the staircase appeared. With his hand covered in a bloody
rag, he made his way up to retrieve his wand.
"Severus?" Albus questioned as he saw him enter through the door. He glanced down
and saw his hand, and gave a disappointed look.
"Not again Severus? That I believe is the 10th mirror you have broken." Albus said as he
approached him.
"What I do on my own time is my own business." Snape sneered.
"Inflicting pain on yourself is not healthy Severus." Albus said as he motioned for the
PotionÕs Master to sit down.
"I do not do it intentionally, you know that." He said as he looked down at his feet.
"You cannot change the past Severus, you know that. You must move on."
"How can I when I am constantly reminded! "
"You must tell yourself that you did the best you could and move on, that is all."
"It is not that simple."
"I know Severus, why else would you be struggling with this for 25 years now."
"Yes, I do not need reminding." He said taking his wand in his hand and unwrapping the
soiled cloth.
"Give me your hand, you were never good and healing yourself." Albus smiled. Severus
obeyed and pushed up the sleeve of his robe. Albus wrapped his hands over SeverusÕs and
whispered an ancient spell, and instantly his hand was no longer bloody and broken. Albus
looked down and starred at the arm where the dark mark once occupied.
"Funny, how we doubt the past, waiting and wondering what will be next." Albus said
letting go of SeverusÕs hand.
"I live in the past, you of all people know that."
"I know, pity really, if you could just find a nice woman and settle down." At this Severus
gave the Headmaster a queried look.
"So I suppose you and the Hat are in this together?" Severus questioned.
"What makes you say that? This gift exchange is merely a festive activity, to get the faculty
involved." Albus eyes twinkled.
"So, letÕs just say that this is not another excuse to get me and Granger together, what
would you get her?" He questioned knowing that Albus was lying.
"Ah, so you donÕt know what to get your Secret Santa? Well, I did happen to notice that
Miss Granger spends quite a bit of her time in the library."
"I am not blind, Albus I know she spends all of her time with her nose in books, but
perhaps she would like something else, something different." He rose his eyebrows.
"Ah, I knew my plan would work." Albus said.
"Ah ha, I caught you, I knew this was another useless attempt to get me to get to know her.
Well I will tell you this right now. I have not, and will not love another woman! I will not
put myself at risk again!" He shouted.
"Severus, really donÕt you think you should move on. Adolyn would have wanted you to be
happy, in fact I know it." Albus said as he looked at the saddened man in front of him.
"Forgive me Headmaster but you donÕt know shit, so piss off, and stop trying to help me.
No one can help me!" He yelled as he walked off in anger.
"No, Severus I cannot help you, you must help yourself before it is too late." Albus said
to himself.
"I think it is time for me to take a visit to Hogsmeade." Albus said as he threw some floo
powder into the fireplace and stepped in.
"RosmertaÕs!"