By Pain of Death

by G. D. Gauss

A small glimpse at the hardships of war. Ficlet during RotJ A young pilot prepares for the most important battle of her life. Luke must, yet again, face the hardships of war amidst the celebration of the Empire's fall.

By Pain of Death: A small glimpse at the hardships of war
By G.D. Gauss

Summary- Ficlet during RotJ A young pilot prepares for the most important battle of her life. Luke must, yet again, face the hardships of war amidst the celebration of the Empire's fall.

Disclaimer: I do not own or claim to own any of Lucas' characters, names, plot, etc... This story was written not to earn profit but for the purpose of entertaining fanfiction-deprived fans only. I am not earning any profit from it whatsoever.

Author's Note: It's been a very long time since I've written a Star Wars fic... in fact, it's been quite a while since I've posted at all on My last fic was LotR, "Duath uin Taur- Darkness of the Forest". Anyway, if I spelled anything wrong, please don't hesitate to inform me! Thanks!

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¤¤Shortly before the battle of the second Death Star and the Endor moon deflector shield deactivation mission¤¤The main Alliance cruiser ship¤¤
A young female pilot is preparing for the battle right before the debww.fanriefing.

A bundle of nerves loosed themselves from beneath Énah's stomach and she took a deep, soothing breath. She had fought in many small battles and run missions near her home in the Bothan Space sector. Her family was one of the few that were human in that area. Still she had never been on the Outer Rim of the galaxy before and the whole idea of a small portion of the Alliance's existence resting on her shoulders was quite nerve-racking.

Yet, she had been honored to be promoted to the Alliance's primary fleet after having, rather unexpectedly, helped bring important information on the Imperial battle station to the Alliance base with some of the Bothan spies. Most of them were badly wounded and many of them died. Énah had secretly taken a few of them on board her small ship and navigated through territorial space to the Alliance's current location past the Corellian Trade Spine (which was, quite frankly, dangerously beyond her experience of travel).

Énah took up her helmet from where it rested on the locker shelf. She left the equipment room and emerged immediately into the brightly lit docking bay where many pilots, mechanics, and officers were bustling towards, away from, and around her... though, most were headed towards the debriefing hall.

Tools drilled and echoed loudly across the bay and the smells of fuel and oil fumes filled the air. Ships' engines were started and turned off again, being tested and tuned up to make sure they were fit for the battle. Énah had to leave the bay quickly before her nerves made her turn around and head right back to the equipment room again.

She found a small group of chuckling and chattering male fighter pilots to follow and kept close behind them until they reached the steps to the open debriefing hall, the floor of which was set about half a level down from the main bay.

Énah left them and found a solitary seat by the back wall near the control room. She preferred to sit by herself as she knew practically no one except for General Madine who was the one that discovered and recruited her from her former position.

Just as the courtesy chime from a nearby convenience droid sounded, several more raucous pilots filed in around Énah and took their seats, much to her dismay. She scooted back in her seat as far as she could and crossed her arms around the helmet that rested in her lap. The pilots quieted down quickly as did the rest of the hall.

Down on the hall floor, Mon Mothma approached the projector terminal. Everyone was still and silent at her reverent appearance.

"The Emperor has made a critical error and the time for our attack has come." She described the information brought by the Bothan spies and the projector displayed an image of the new Death Star which was still in construction. The weapons system was not yet operational, as Mothma informed. Her expression then changed... she looked grave and her skin turned terribly pale. "Many Bothans died to bring us this information."

Énah's gaze held for a while on the highly respected woman's face. She had not realized until now just how crucial that data really was. Her stomach turned.

"Admiral Ackbar, please." Mon Mothma stepped slowly away as her gaze lowered to the floor. The Mon Calamari officer who had been standing just behind her now approached the projector image and continued the debriefing on the mission's main focus.

The projector's image showed how the fighters would enter an exhaust portal and go right to the power source of the Death Star. As the image of the battle station shut down, Ackbar turned toward a tall, blond officer standing nearby. Énah recognized him immediately. The Admiral motioned to him, "General Madine."

Madine addressed each mission group and its leader, then described their mission and purpose. When he announced that one group would take a stolen Imperial shuttle down to the forest moon to deactivate the deflector shield, a murmur broke out in the hall.

Énah barely caught a young, dark-haired woman down in the front at the floor of the hall speaking to someone next to her. Énah recognized her as Princess Leia Organa, quite a person of importance to the Alliance. "I wonder who they got to pull that off." The man sitting next to her looked slightly offended. He was about to say something, but he looked up when he heard Madine speak his name.

"General Solo, is your strike team assembled?"

Princess Leia stared at him with a slightly open mouth and an incredulous expression.

General Solo ignored her the best he could. "My strike team is ready, but I don't have a command crew."

Almost immediately, a wookiee that everyone had tried to sit as far away from for the entire debriefing growled and wuffed at the General. He seemed to know what the wookiee was saying.

"It's going to be rough, pal. I didn't want to speak for you."

The creature made a short grunt of confirmation and the General smiled. "There's one."

The princess's expression suddenly softened and she smiled. "Hey, general, count me in!"

Then, another voice echoed from across the hall, up on the main level. "I'm with you, too." A young, fair-haired man who was dressed all in black and carried an unusual weapon at his side appeared at the top of the far staircase. Énah recognized him but couldn't quite place his face at the moment. She also recognized the weapon he carried, and she was one of few that did. It was a light-saber, the weapon of a Jedi Knight.

As he reached the floor of the hall and greeted his friends, Énah racked her brain, trying to remember where she had seen him before. Suddenly, when he stood next to General Solo, an image flashed through Énah's head of a picture in a news column she had seen a couple of years ago. It was in the highlight section of every news chip in the galaxy the day after the first Death Star had been destroyed by the Alliance. Énah had printed a copy of the article and tacked it to a bulletin board in her bedroom. She used to see it every morning when she woke up.

She mentally skipped through what she could recall of the article, trying to remember the names mentioned. Yavin IV... Vader... Princess Leia Organa! She was one of the figures in the picture.

Énah continued through the names. Antilles... Darklighter... Captain Han Solo--... General Solo! He had rushed in to save the battle at the last minute. He was also in the picture with a medal of honor around his neck.

When Énah came to that name, another name struck her memory. Skywalker... that was it! Commander Luke Skywalker, the young man in black with the Jedi's weapon. He had been the last fighter pilot left in the X-wing group who was still capable of making the shot that was so fatal to the Imperial battle station. He, also with a medal, was in the picture next to Solo.

Admiration flowed through Énah and she so longed to tell the Commander how she had had his picture pinned to her chamber wall for several years and dreamed of becoming a great fighter pilot just like him. She also found it mysteriously coincidental that he had become a Jedi Knight since then. She herself had had a Jedi in her family, though he died long ago.

Énah found herself being pushed out of the row of seats with the other pilots, though she stopped at the staircase that lead down to the hall floor. If Skywalker had been facing her, she would have just followed the rest of the pilots out to the docking bay. But he had his back turned toward her and Énah felt she had clearance to walk down to the floor and see if she could attract his attention without embarrassing herself.

When she reached the floor level, General Solo's gaze caught her over Skywalker's shoulder, who turned his head to see who his friend was staring at. Énah smiled, though she could feel the muscles in her face quivering. She had never met anyone even remotely famous before.

"Commander Skywalker, right?" She said as she approached him.

He nodded and turned to face her. "Yes, can I help you?"

Énah immediately felt her face reddening. "Oh! No, no. I just recognized you from a news article photo I saw a few years ago from the Yavin battle. Oh, and General Solo and Princess Leia, of course."

She could have sworn she saw Skywalker hold back a chuckle at her last comment. Leia seemed to realize that she and Solo weren't really the ones this young pilot wanted to talk to so she started to walk away with a slightly dejected look on her face.

Solo gave a lopsided smile for courtesy and held up his finger. "Uh, 'scuse us." He hurried after Leia and she immediately started whispering her disapproval to him. Énah felt bad but also became suddenly ecstatic to find that she and Skywalker were the only ones left on the debriefing hall floor.

She almost jumped when Skywalker spoke again. "I'll bet that battle won a lot of publicity." Énah nodded enthusiastically. She stopped suddenly and felt her face redden even more. No matter how hard she tried to keep her dignity, what little she had being only nineteen, she only ended up acting like a fool and saying silly things.

She was just slightly encouraged when Skywalker continued. "I don't believe I caught your name."

"Oh! I'm sorry, Commander Skywalker, I never gave it. I'm Énah Feziim from Bothawui."

Skywalker held out his hand to shake hers. "Énah? It's a pleasure to meet you... and please, call me Luke. I was a fighter pilot myself not too long ago, so I try to avoid formal titles with other pilots. In fact, I grew up with a few of them."

"Really?" Énah felt like she was going to float away if she didn't keep her feet firmly planted to the ground. "Where are you from? ... If you don't mind my asking, that is."

"Hutt territory. I was born on Tatooine, as far as I know. I could be mistaken."

"That's funny." Énah wrinkled her nose and pushed her wavy dark hair out of her face. "I don't think I've ever heard of any Jedi Knights from Tatooine."

Luke smiled. "What makes you think I'm a Jedi Knight?" Énah noticed that he dropped his left hand in front of his light-saber as he said this.

"Well, first of all," she said as she leaned to the side to glance behind his arm, "you've got a light-saber, and only Jedi use light-sabers."

Luke crossed his arms over his chest, having given up hiding the weapon on his belt. "Perhaps I killed a Jedi and stole it from him?"

Énah giggled. "I wouldn't believe that. It's impossible to kill a Jedi!"

Luke sighed. "I wish that were true." Énah's smile faded. She wondered briefly what he meant by that... then had the strangest feeling that she'd had this conversation before with someone. It was probably just dèja-vous.

He continued. "Actually, I'm not really a Jedi Knight. Not officially. Though, I will be soon."

Énah looked hopeful. "Are you going to open a Jedi school and teach others?"

"Possibly... eventually. Why do you ask?"

"Well, there are so few of you left-... actually, I thought they had all been killed long ago. It would be a shame if there was no one left to teach new Jedi. And my dad told me that there was a Jedi in our family a long time ago."

Luke suddenly looked very interested. "Is that so? Do you remember their name?"

"Oh, yeah! He was known as Qui-gon Jinn, but he might have had another name. He was my great uncle on my father's side. All I really know about him is that he had an apprentice named... Oh gosh! I can't remember the name... something like Obiw-.. Obi- something. And he also started to teach another that was really young, but died almost immediately after. Do you know about him?"

Luke shook his head. "No... but I think I've heard of him. Was his first apprentice's name Obiwan Kenobi?"

"Yes! That's it! Do you know him?"

"Yes... I knew him. He was my first instructor... but he was killed soon after... funny coincidence, isn't it, that he should suffer a similar fate to his master's?" His expression was grave and he seemed to have something brooding in his mind. "Do you remember the name of his very young apprentice, by any chance?"

Énah furrowed her brows, but shook her head. "No... I don't remember much of the story. All I know is that he was from... Hey! From Tatooine, just like you! I guess you aren't the only Jedi from there, after all."

Luke only kept thinking, his gaze latched to a spot on the wall across the room. He soon began nodding.

Énah started to become concerned. "Comman-... er, Luke? Are you all right?"

Luke closed his eyes and nodded quickly. "Yes, just... piecing some things together, is all. But it's not important." He opened his eyes again and smiled, though the smile was empty and distant. Énah noticed for the first time how clear and blue his eyes were. She had this sudden to desire to figure out what was troubling him... to make him happy and bring out a real smile.

A voice on a com echoing throughout the docking bay brought Énah back to what she was doing. "Oh! Oh my, I'd better get going." She briefly held up the helmet that had been resting under her arm the whole time.

Luke quickly stepped forward to take her hand again. "It was truly nice talking with you, Énah."

She nodded. "You too." She was then completely surprised when he lifted her hand to his mouth and kissed it. It must have shown in her face.

Luke grinned and shrugged. "We may never see each other again."

Énah smiled and nodded. "You're right." Just at that moment, she felt that she had the ability to do anything. If what he said was true, it wouldn't matter what they did right now. With a flutter in her stomach, she began to realize that Luke must have been thinking the same thing. He was slowly leaning forward and Énah found that she was doing the same. Their lips were only millimeters apart when the voice on the com in the docking bay echoed once again.

Énah gazed up into his eyes. "I have to go." She whispered. Luke nodded. She turned to leave and got to the bottom of the steps when his voice made her turn her head.

"Énah! May the Force be with you."

Énah smiled. She continued on the way to her X-wing.

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Chewbacca had already settled himself in the cockpit of the shuttle and began flipping switches. The shuttle's engines hissed and roared to life. Luke stood on the dock near the ship's entrance, pulling on the camouflage poncho that he had been supplied. He sensed Han and Leia approaching from behind before he heard them.

"Hey, kid. You all set?" Han had a camouflage jacket on and Leia was wearing a poncho similar to Luke's, a helmet with the same pattern tucked under her arm.

Luke picked up his own helmet from the floor and nodded. He was unaware of the slightly shaken expression on his face.

Leia's brows furrowed. "Luke, is everything all right?" She walked up to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "What's with you today? You seem a bit quieter than usual."

"Nah, he looks different than before. Maybe that pilot wanted to flirt a little." Han grinned and winked.

"Oh yes, I forgot about that." Said Leia, suddenly smiling. "So, what did she have to say?"

Luke shrugged and glanced down at his feet. "Nothing important, really. I guess she just wanted to meet me."

"You guess?" Han chuckled. "Well, that's an obvious sign if I ever heard one!"

Luke's brows furrowed. "What are you talking about?"

Han's expression turned to disbelief. "Didn't you ever chase the girls when you were a kid? What do you think it means when they giggle and blush like that?"

When Luke finally realized what Han was getting at, he immediately felt his cheeks get warm and he tried to keep a straight face... Han had no idea how close to the truth he actually was. He tried to act oblivious. "Han, I was schooled at home. By the time I bothered having any female friends, I was too old to chase them and only raced against them on speeders down Beggar's Canyon."

Han's expression only became more incredulous and Leia rolled her eyes. It seemed like he was about to say something hurtfully sarcastic but he was cut off when a loud, rumbling roar echoed from the ramp of the shuttle sitting only a few meters away. Chewbacca was in the cockpit, waving his hairy arms frantically and growling his impatience.

Threepio, who was just about to follow Artoo up the ramp, found it necessary to voice the urgency of the situation. "Pardon me, General Solo, but we really should hurry. The pilots are already heading to their stations."

Luke ducked under Han's arm (he had practically been pinned against the wall) and couldn't help but search the many familiar faces, all wearing orange flight suits, that were rushing to board their fighters as he headed for the ramp.

A pale face framed with long, wavy, dark hair caught his eyes. Énah was jogging towards her X-wing where a red R2 unit was being lowered into the droid terminal. The mechanic finished securing the droid and nodded to Énah. "Red-five, clear for takeoff."

She stopped at the ladder to pull on her helmet but paused with it hovering over her head. She had just spotted Luke across the docking bay.

He stood perfectly still for several moments simply taking in the sight of her. He could see the fear in her eyes... the same terror mixed with excitement and eagerness that he had felt the first time he had climbed into the cockpit of an X-wing.

Énah gave a small, brief smile and pulled the helmet over her head, then tucked her hair into her flight suit. She saluted Luke before quickly ascending the ladder and vaulting into the pilot's seat.

Luke felt a gentle arm around his shoulders as Leia led him up the ramp of the shuttle. He remained in a sort of daze as he found his seat in the cockpit behind the pilot's chair and buckled the restraining belt. Han was still down on the bay, convincing Lando Calrissian that he should take the Millennium Falcon into battle. Luke could vaguely hear their voices through the open ramp below him.

He didn't hear any of the conversation as Han appeared and settled himself in the pilot's chair, and the droids voiced and bleeped their complaints about space travel (though, mostly just Threepio. Artoo only made a bleeping comment with an air of ridicule).

The engines of Y, A, and X-wing fighters were being warmed up, the pilots racing to their cockpits and getting clearance confirmations from the mechanics. Luke's eyes fixed on Énah's fighter, which was just starting its vertical liftoff. He was slightly jarred from his reverie by a comment from Han.

"... I just got this funny feeling... like I'm never going to see her again." He was, of course, referring to his ship, the Falcon. Though, Luke's eyes once again wandered to the one X-wing that was now following its fellows from the docking bay and out into the dark expanse of space.

After Han had maneuvered the craft out of the cruiser's bay and past the army of the Alliance's fighters and command ships standing by, the gravely voice of Admiral Ackbar came over the shuttle's com. "General Solo, we'll be waiting for your signal. May the Force be with you."

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¤¤Approximately two days later, the Empire has been defeated¤¤The forest moon of Endor in the midst of an Ewok tribal celebration¤¤

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The last wisps of smoke from the funeral pyre curled around the trunks of trees surrounding Luke as he turned and began the short trek back to the Ewok camp.

He was exhausted, aching, emotionally drained, and longing for some sort of friendly companionship after having spent the past 12 hours in the clean-cut, grave surroundings of Imperial prisoner hospitality.

The instant he entered the clearing he was bombarded by grinning, laughing faces. Leia's arms were clenched around his waist, Lando gave him a few good slaps on the back, and Han had am arm around his neck in a fierce, joyous hug. Luke made sure to separate himself from the crowd just before Chewbacca rampaged in and expressed his gratitude.

When he was finally able to pull away from the wookiee's strong grasp, Luke spotted a group of pilots emerging into the clearing on the other side, arms over each others' shoulders. One of them was Wedge Antilles, the commander of Red group, the X-wings.

Luke's heart beat faster as he began to fight his way through the crowd, searching all the while amidst that group for a pale face and wavy, dark hair. He nearly ran straight into Wedge as his attention was straying elsewhere. Wedge had to hold out his hands at Luke's shoulders to keep them from colliding.

"Woah, Luke! Where are you going?" Wedge asked, giving him a good-natured slap on the arm.

Luke seemed about to answer, but his eyes kept flickering over the crowd for a particular someone. He suddenly grabbed Wedge's wrist and pulled him over to the edge of the clearing.

"Wedge... I see Hobbie and Janson over there, but where's the rest of the Red group?" Luke's eyes finally came to rest on his old friend's face.

Wedge's grin faded slowly and his skin became strangely pale. "Um... Gee, Luke. I don't know how to tell you this, but... that's it. There aren't any more of us."

Luke could feel his stomach suddenly drop and the blood drained from his face. He furrowed his brows. He knew what this meant but couldn't quite accept it just yet. "But-... I know there were at least ten of them, I saw them all leave the docking bay." He said with a nervous laugh.

Wedge began shaking his head. "Luke... didn't you see the battle?" He paused and gripped Luke's shoulders to make sure he understood. "Hobbie, Janson, and I are the only ones who made it back. Every other X fighter was lost in the fight."

Luke couldn't remember how long he simply stood there, gazing straight into Wedge's concerned face, before being shaken awake again. "Luke... Luke! Are you all right, buddy?"

"Yeah," he began nodding his head. "Yeah... I'll be all right. It's just..." Luke motioned to the rather small group of pilots standing only meters away, all of which consisted of what remained of the entire four-dozen strong fighter fleet that had set out two days ago.

Wedge nodded with him. "I know. I understand. It's not easy, is it? Seeing people you've known since you were a kid, gone within a second's notice." Wedge's voice was quiet and Luke soon found himself at peace. "But it's all over now, Luke. We did it. No more deaths. Those guys died for the freedom of the whole galaxy... and it's all over now."

The music drumming in the background finally seeped into Luke's consciousness. The shouts of the Ewoks and joyous laughter of the various pilots and officers rang in his ears.

Wedge gave his friend one last little shake. "You all right?"

Luke nodded slowly and smiled. "Yeah, Wedge. I'm all right."

Wedge smiled back. "Good." He gave Luke a last pat on the shoulder and turned to rejoin the celebration. Luke stood where he was for several moments, then turned around and walked a little ways beyond the clearing into the woods. His head had been lowered, staring in deep thought at the forest floor, but when he raised his gaze, the sight before him was a bit startling. Though Luke only smiled.

Three transparent beings, filled with an omniscient light, stood in a row. One was Obi-wan Kenobi who Luke had seen in this state before. Obi-wan smiled softly and nodded, then looked to his side. There was Yoda, much shorter than Kenobi, resting on an old tree stump. He had a look of great pride on his old, withered face. The small creature sat perfectly still only until he also turned his head to look to the third figure standing beside him.

Luke had never seen this person in his true form. It was has father, whole and clean of the Dark Side's power. He didn't have a look of pride or even approval on his face like his companions, but the look of a father when he gazes upon his child for the first or last time. Luke even swore that he could see tears forming.

A gentle hand was suddenly laid on his shoulder. He turned his head to see Leia's beautiful smiling face. Though, Luke could see that she was concerned. He smiled the most sincere smile he could muster. Leia finally broke her 'worried sister act' and laughed. She began to pull him away towards the clearing and Luke turned to look one last time at the great Jedi still standing behind him.

She belongs with them, now. Luke thought to himself. They'll watch over her.

Above him in the sky, fireworks blasted and the remains of the Death Star's explosion still remained in the starry expanse. The New Republic was born.

¤¤The End¤¤