Well not much to say…

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Chapter 2 First Kiss

Ginny had been laughing because that was the only thing she could do except crying and she didn't wanted to do that in front of him, not then. She had told him all about her feeling after their first kiss a week later.

¤¤¤¤¤¤Flashback¤¤¤¤¤¤

"Is that the cupboard?" Ginny asked, staring at the little door under the stairs. The Dursleys were out for the day. Dudley was over at some member of his gang 'drinking tea' and his parents had gone to London to buy holyday clothes.

"Yes" Harry said.

"You lived in there for ten years?" Ginny asked reaching to open it but stopped herself "Do you mind if I take a look?"

"No it's okay I think it's full of my aunts magazines now anyway" Harry replied and Ginny opened it. To his surprise, it was just the way he left it all those years ago. He changed his mind he didn't want Ginny to see how horrible he had had it, he didn't want her to feel sorry for him.

"I suppose you weren't so tall back then were you?" Ginny said and entered the cupboard.

"You don't want to be in there" Harry said "It's full of spiders"

"Ron is afraid of spiders not me" Ginny said and sat down on the mattress inside.

"I used to think the world was a good place you know" Ginny said sadly. Harry didn't know what to say he had never thought the world was a good place.

"I used to adore you, I used to imagine how you got new parents and lived happily ever after" Ginny said laying down on the mattress she had to pull her legs up to fit.

"I used to feel so sorry for you" Ginny went on "But you are really no different everybody has it hard"

"Dumbledore wants me to kill Voldemort" Harry whispered before he could stop himself. It had tormented his mind for too long, he had never intended for it too slip but he couldn't help it the cupboard was the last drop.

Ginny froze "What did you say?"

Harry didn't want Ginny to worry about him but he couldn't hold this inside anymore "The prophesy, Dumbledore all ready knew what it said"

Ginny sat up in the cupboard and pulled her legs up to her chest. Harry sank down in front of her across the hall also pulling his leg up to his chest. A tear rolled down his cheek he was breaking down completely and he could do nothing to stop it. A single sob escaped him. Ginny crawled over to him and out an arm around him for comfort.

Harry leaned his head on her shoulder and cried for everything, for his parents, for his ten years in a cupboard, for Ginny when she was possessed, for Cedric and his family, for Sirius and all his years in Azkaban, but most of all for himself. He cried for ages, loud sobs racked his frame. He had never cried like this before and he had never realised how much he needed it.

"It's okay, Harry" Ginny whispered "What did the prophesy say?"

"It said I was the one… the one to kill Voldemort or he would kill me" Harry whispered hoarsely.

"Did you actually believe that?" Ginny asked and giggled softly.

"Yes, Dumbledore do too" Harry said.

Ginny giggled even more "So you are just going to play along, you are actually going to believe all that?"

"Well… shouldn't I?" Harry asked some tears still on his cheeks.

"Hell no!" Ginny exclaimed "You choose. Is that what you want to do with your life?"

"No" Harry answered "I used to think so, but I just want to get on with my life"

"Then screw the prophesy" Ginny said "You've done your part, a prophesy can't control your life"

"I can't" Harry said weakly and pointed to his scar "We are attached"

"Haven't you practised Occlumency?" Ginny asked.

"But what if I see something that can save lives?" Harry asked.

"To… Voldemort won't let you see anything like that, he knows about your link now" Ginny said urgently "I'll help you practise we'll learn toget…"

Harry couldn't help it she was just too close, her lips looking too soft and his emotions too strained. He knew he probably looked like hell with tears of his cheeks and red eyes but that wasn't important. Before he could think and before Ginny could pull away, he leaned in and kissed her on the lips. They were much softer then they looked and they tickled him slightly as she was still talking. She fell quite quickly though and swallowed soundly their lips still touching. She blinked her big brown eyes and then as if she just realised what happened pulled away from him and fell backwards down on the floor.

"Ginny" Harry managed to croak out.

"Don't" Ginny said and stood up hurriedly.

"Ginny" He said urgently as she made for the door.

"You shouldn't have done that Harry" She said as she turned the door handle her back still turned to him. Harry however had lived through too many situations with his nerves strained to maximum and acted as he usually did in these situations without thinking. Ginny had made it out to the doorstep when Harry caught up with her.

"Let me go Harry" Ginny said firmly her eyes blazing with anger.

"Ginny don't leave me" Harry begged.

"You had no right to do that" Ginny snapped.

"Sorry" Harry apologized "I couldn't help it I didn't plan it I know you don't like me and I won't do it again"

Ginny glared at him for a full minute but then her gaze softened "All right just don't do that again"

"I won't" Harry promised "Will you still help me with Occlumency, or did I ruin that"

"It's all right I will help you if you can keep your distance" Ginny said and walked back into the house. Harry closed the door behind them.

"Look I'm sorry I ran, but I don't like you that way Harry and it was a little bit too sudden" Ginny said.

"Don't apologize" Harry said softly. His emotions started to catch up with him now again and he felt worse then before he had cried on her shoulder. He had hoped that Ginny might have liked him enough to just give him a chance and not reject him right away. He realised that he shouldn't have stopped Ginny on her way back to Mrs Figg, he would have appreciated to be alone, at the moment.

"So want some tea" Ginny asked making her way towards the kitchen "I know how to make it in a muggle kitchen now"

"Sure" Harry said trying with all his might to pull himself together, he managed to walk all the way to the kitchen and sit down at the table. He leaned his head on his hands and tried to think of something nice to prevent his tears to start rolling down his cheeks again. He tried to use the technique he had used when Aunt Marge had visited Privet Drive and focused as hard as possible on his broom care book. As the time when he had blown up Marge he found that the technique wasn't working.

"Don't worry Harry" Ginny said brightly and pored him a cup of hot water "We'll practice Occlumency and everything will be alright"

"Ginny" Harry said breathing heavily desperately trying to keep all his tears inside "Perhaps… perhaps you better go we can see each other tomorrow again"

"Why? You aren't sick or something are you?" Ginny asked "You look a little hot"

"No I'm fine I just need to be alone" Harry said staring intently at his steaming cup of hot water.

"Are you sure you are alright" Ginny asked gently "You sound like you have been running a mile"

"Please just leave me" Harry begged her.

"It's not your scar is it?" Ginny asked lowering her voice.

"No" Harry said gritting his teeth painfully hard "I just need to be alone"

"Is it something I said?" Ginny asked "I told you I was sorry about running away like that"

"Damn it Ginny don't you realise you just broke my heart!" Harry jelled and ran up to his room leaving Ginny in the kitchen. He felt stupid and childish to run away from her like that but he wouldn't cry in front of her again. He buried himself deep in his bed trying to fall asleep and not feel any more pain. He couldn't fall asleep however, instead he lay cursing himself for being so stupid. Why did he have to like someone who didn't like him and why did he have to be so bloody weak? No wonder Ginny didn't like him, he had just cried like a baby on her and then kissed her just like that.

A few minutes later, he could hear Ginny walking up the stairs.

"Is this your room, Harry?" Ginny asked as she opened the door to his room.

"Come to gloat?" Harry asked angrily "I know I missed my chance but do you have to rub it in like this? What do you want me to do?"

"Harry" Ginny said walking resolutely forward to his bed "I want you to know that I can't do this"

"What?" He asked.

"I know what you and Cho had and I could never do that" Ginny said determinedly.

"I understand that" Harry said forcing his voice not to shake.

"Look at me Harry" Ginny commanded and Harry turned slowly around in his bed so that he faced her "Stand up!"

Harry did what she said, he couldn't think of a reason why not she would obviously not leave until he had done so.

"Harry" Ginny said looking strait into his eyes "I can't be what Cho was to you"

"Right" Harry said bitterly "You said that"

"I mean I can't be just what Cho was to you" Ginny said pleadingly as if hoping he would understand something "I can't settle with that"

"What do you mean" Harry asked breathlessly, he had no idea of what Ginny meant but it didn't sound as bad as he had expected.

"I can't have another childish immature relationship I need more" Ginny said forcefully as if it cost her every part of her determination to tell him that.

"But you don't like me" Harry said.

"I haven't liked you for many years" Ginny said taking huge deep breaths as if trying to calm herself. Harry noticed she was trembling "I realised when I was going out with Michael that I loved you, he noticed it too so we had a row and I told him I didn't want to see him again. It was not about Quidditch"

"You loved me?" Harry asked.

"I love you Harry" Ginny said "And you have to love me too or it won't work you can't just like me a little for a few weeks, if there is going to be anything between us it has to be serious. And I understand if you are not ready for that but I can't have anything in between like you had with Cho"

"Are you sure?" Harry asked disbelievingly.

Ginny nodded unable to speak, Harry suddenly noticed that she had her wand in her hand and squeezed it hard.

"What are you doing with your wand?" Harry asked uncertainly.

"I'm going to obliviate myself" Ginny said seriously now trembling worse then ever.

"Why?" Harry asked stupidly.

"I couldn't go on otherwise" Ginny said firmly "I am not as brave as you"

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They shared their first real kiss after that and Ginny had never needed to obliviate herself since it turned out to be a really good memory.

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The youngest Weasley… who would have guessed? *sarcasm*