Elanor felt a bit out of place in this tall, elegant elfish place. Bilbo was singing his cute little hobbitish song, and the other hobbits seemed a little entranced by their surroundings. Elanor wanted bigger (well, smaller) fish, however, and not really fish, if we are quite honest with ourselves.

No, she wanted Pippin, and by golly, she was going to get him.

She looked around innocently (though no one would have noticed if she had glanced about in the same manner as an orc), searching for her Pippin. She found him, staring into space dreamily.

Why wasn't he staring at her dreamily? She wondered indignantly.

Just as she was about to pounce on him, and force him to stare at her dreamily whether he liked it or not (or at least say 'erm, hello Pippin, how are this nice evening?') she felt a tap on her shoulder.

Resisting the urge to growl, Elanor turned around.

'What do you want?' She groaned, seeing her best friend standing there, looking mighty pleased with herself. 'Can't you see that I'm busy at the moment?'

'Doing what?' Luthien answered. Not really expecting an answer, she continued. 'You are not going to BELIEVE what just happened.'

'Well then, I'll continue what I'm doing, shall I?'

'Hell no, you have to guess.'

'But I don't want to guess,' Elanor whined. 'I want my Pippin.'

'You shall have to wait…okay then, I will tell you, and you will listen.'

'Be quick about it, or he might move.'

'Do you think about nothing else?' Luthien said, distracted for the moment.

'Of course I do. Are you going to tell me this story or not?'

'Yes. Well,' she said dramatically. 'I was over there, talking to Paedophile elf, right, and then my darling came over- to me, might I add, not to anyone else but ME- and he said something beautiful because he always says something beautiful, and then Elrond got a bit shirty and Legolas wanted to talk about Gollum, and so I escaped from the paedophile's evil clutches, and I know that my love, my one and only loves ME!' Luthien clasped her hand to her heart. 'Me, he loves me!'

'Yay,' Elanor said, quite unenthusiastically.

Luthien appeared to be slightly crestfallen. 'Aren't you happy for me?'

'Yes, well, I am.'

'Can I please have a 'oh my god, you're going to get a valentine this year, that is so exciting,' girly sort of hug then please?'

Elanor looked her elf friend up and down. 'Well, I would. But it's just so much effort, you see.'

'Ah, yes, good point. Well…can I have a oh my god, you're going to get a valentine this year hand shake then?'

And so they shook hands.

'Well, now that that's out of the way…oh no, he's gone.' Elanor peered around the elves, her face forlorn. 'You made darling go, Luthien.'

'Legolas loves me,' she answered, her face blissful.

Elanor scowled ad stomped away.

'I'll see you tomorrow morning then?' Luthien called after her cheerfully.

Elanor waved listlessly and continued her way back to bed, feeling quite put out and sad, because Legolas loved Luthien, and okay that was good and all, yes, we do all agree with that. But now she didn't have anyone, because Pippin really only noticed her properly when she was eating, and Luthien was all sappy and mushed up over Legolas, which was okay sometimes but when one is hungry and they have no Pippin…

She sighed loudly, burped, and snuggled up under the covers.

-------

Luthien was in a land of ignorant bliss. At one stage she suspected that Elrond had winked at her, but she paid no heed to this, for Legolas loved her- or at least, he was well on the way to loving her, and they were basically one and the same thing.

Ew, the thought of Elrond, a billion year old elf, finally caught up with her and she shuddered visibly.

Then, while thinking that perhaps there had been something in his eye, and at least he could wink better than Elanor, she saw Him, the light of her life.

'Legolas,' she muttered to herself. 'I must stay calm and I must not throw myself at him…that would not be good, and he might be scared off…'

She breathed deeply and walked calmly over to him, though in her mind her…mind…was shrieking to the heavens 'LEGOLAS MY LOVE!'

'Greetings, fair Legolas,' she said, smiling at him elfishly.

He nodded to her, a small smile on his lips.

'Let us make sweet passionate love by the moonlight,' she said conversationally.

Legolas started, and blinked at her, speechless.

'Er- I- I mean- let us make sweet passion fruit that I love by the moonlight,' she stammered, hoping that this would somehow make sense to Legolas.

It didn't really, but he would accept it, as it was more normal than him and she making sweet passionate love together at this hour. It was far too late for anything like that, and anyway, they'd just met.

Legolas prided himself on the fact that he was not a hasty sort of elf. Aragorn had once told him that playing hard to get was the way to go, and obviously it had worked for him. Legolas thought he must have played very, very hard to get, and possibly had given Arwen some nice presents or something, because though Aragorn was ruggedly handsome, in a rugged sort of way, surely a beautiful elf maiden would choose someone elfishly handsome over someone who hardly ever seemed to wash their hair?

Or maybe it was just true love…yes, that would be sweet, Legolas thought, and turned to Luthien, who was still blushing over the fact that she had suggested to Legolas they make sweet passionate love by moonlight, though very prettily she blushed. Not the bright red flushy sort of blush, more of a pink tinged cheeks sort of blush, which rather suited her.

'I hear there are some nice passion fruits at this time of year,' Luthien continued. Oh, where was Elanor and her continuous rambling when you really needed her? Luthien wondered desperately. Off asleep, that's where, and what a fat lot of good that was going to do her now. Legolas was looking at her like she was some sort of bright pink passion fruit.

'Oh?' He said, pretending to know what passion fruits were.

'Oh, yes,' Luthien said knowledgably. 'But perhaps we should leave that for another night, as I am sure you are very tired, and tomorrow is the council of Elrond, is it not?'

'That is true,' he said. He smiled at her (Luthien's stomach fluttered about happily). 'Faretheewell.'

She waved (gracefully) and watched him walk away. Phew. Well, at least he hadn't run screaming. That was somewhat of a relief.

Off to bed for me, she thought to herself happily. Tonight she would have sweet dreams of she and Legolas making passion fruit by the light of the moon…

____

Back in Adelaide, Australia, sitting in an empty classroom at recess, sat six friends, though once there would have been nine, but Jess had fallen into darkness and Sarah-jane and Lucy had disappeared off the face of the earth without a trace.

'Where could they be?' Claire said sadly, and proceeded to bite into her tuna sandwich.

'Well, Jess is at Balaclava High,' Emily answered in an all-knowing way.

'I know that. I was talking about the other two.'

'Ah…well…'

Megan gave a sniffle. Suzie cried out in pain for her babies. 'Where are my munchkins?' She wailed.

Courtney made some sort of scathing comment, and Megan sniggered and then remembered she was sad because her buddies had disappeared, and she despairingly chucked her purple fruit-box in the bin- even though it wasn't even finished yet…so, it was a sad time for everyone.

They sat in silence for the rest of recess, mourning their loss, with the knowledge that after recess, they would have cave troll woman (aka Ms Phillips)…oh, the horror of the horrors!