No matter what

For long I have followed him, wherever it have led me. Loving him more than I can tell, for there is something special - no, magic, about him.

Many nights have we spent together, glorious such, and never will I forget the look upon his face when I told him that I loved him more than I ever could imagine. Such relieve, such passion! Nothing will ever push that memory astray, and it is that image I am holding within me now, when all my fears are coming true.

When we arrived to Helm's Deep my heart was torn. I thought he had died, and for endless hours I kept praying that this had not happened, that he was still here with me.

Everything seemed so unimportant - so blurred and unreal - the world had lost its sharpness and sense.

Grief got its hold on me, dragging me down with its cold claws, and I never wanted to awake again, though something made me stay alive. I walked around, and then there he was, tired and dirty, but alive.

At that moment I felt like screaming of joy, hell, I even could have kissed the dwarf, for he was back! Aragorn was alive!

Remarking that he was late, he smiled and then hugged me tightly, mumbling that he had missed me madly. I couldn't do anything but nod.

I was happy that he was back, though when he had spoken to the king I got worried. 300 men against 10 000 uruk-hai, and even if these 300 men had been warriors, it would have been madness to expect victory. They would all die, and he would be one of them.

I kept telling myself that this would work, but when I walked into the armouring-chamber I saw the looks upon everyone's faces, and I couldn't stop myself from despairing. They were doomed.

I begun talking to him, saying something like "Look at them. They're frightened. I can see it in their eyes." and everybody in the room silenced and turned to look at me.

The two of us begun speaking rapidly in Eldalié, saying a lot of things we had never said before, words that burned deep in my soul. It all erupted when he outburst "Then I will die as one of them!"

The words struck me right in the chest, my fear of him dying, and I fled the room, unable to hide the pain inside me.

Re-living the feelings when I thought he had died I understood that I could not bear that, it would claim my own life. If he didn't exist, neither did I.

Never that I would let this happen, I had to fight, to gain strength to push back these threats.

That was what made me get back upon my feet, and I found him sitting by a stair, deep in thought, completely lost from the world.

Placing a gentle hand upon his shoulder I made him aware of my presence, and he smiled weakly at me. He made a gesture towards the space next to him, and I sat down.

"I am sorry, it was wrong of me to despair," I said slowly.

"Think naught of it, we will manage through this," he assured me.

I couldn't stop myself from smiling at his comment, I knew there was a "somehow" that he wanted to add, though he didn't.

We exchanged looks for a while, and I felt how he stroked my cheek carefully, placing a few blonde strands of hair behind my ear.

I responded the same way, slowly letting my hand walk down his shoulder to stop by his upper arm. Our lips brushed against each others, exploring and slowly deepening into something more.

How sweet and right, how could I ever have lived before this man came into my life? Not until now did I understand what it meant to love someone, the feelings that it caused. And I never wanted it to let it fly away from me.

A horn sounded, and we broke our kiss at the same time, looking towards from where the sound had come.

"That is no orc-horn!" I exclaimed.

Getting up on our feet we walked out to the wall to see what was going on, and I almost did not believe what my eyes was showing me.

Elves marched in leads of two up the bridge, and was led by no-one else but Haldir - watcher of the Golden Woods.

Aragorn left my side to greet him, and I heard the conversation quite well from my spot. Not that I would have any troubles hearing it anyhow,

Walking down to them a little while later I greeted them happily, though I refused to speak to Rumil . Haldir's brother, who had almost driven me to suicide a few hundred years back.

Pushing those thoughts away, I spoke to a few of the elves about the immigrations to Valinor that many of them were taking. His family had already left, and he would go as well when this war was over.

I nodded slowly, then grew thoughtful and silent. With gladness would I abandon the light of Valinor to be with my love, though I knew that he wanted me to go there - not because he didn't love me, for he sure did - but for that he did not want me to feel the bitterness of mortality, to not be able to die until all I love is gone.

Smiling bitterly, I reminded myself that we still had to manage the war, I would not leave his side during this, and if I did I would never ever forgive myself.

Battle came to Helm's Deep, the rain pouring down heavily, and everyone fought bravely. The dwarf and I had a small competition of who would kill the most orcs, though that wasn't exactly what filled my thoughts.

I kept on fighting, a lot of it with my Lórien knives, feeling more than I saw, how orcs fell when the blades cut through their skin, killing them one by one.

Every now and then I glanced over at the others to see how they made it, and I grabbed my bow and launched an arrow that went through an orcin skull, the orc just about to cut Aragorn's head off. He threw me a thankful look before we both had to face new opponents.

Long hours passed, and we retreated again and again. My left arm bled from a deep cut and my limbs felt stiff of all the fighting, but I kept on going, ignoring it.

Most of the men and elves had died, Haldir was one of them, and the feeling of hopelessness grew stronger for every moment.

Only two arrows was left in my quiver, and I knew that they would soon be gone.

A scream of pain mad me turn around, and I looked at Aragorn, and then at Gimli. The dwarf was lying down on the ground, a deep cut in the stomach had spilled out his intestines. Metal-rings was all around the wound, spread like raindrops they laid, many of them deformed.

Now it only was me and Aragorn left at this spot, those who had been able, had retreated further back into the Hornburg.

It seemed like Aragorn had realized the same thing, for he begun fighting his way towards the others with a frenzy I had never seen before.

I accompanied him, doing my best to help him. Even though my arm by now was pounding heavily, I fought like it was just a scratch, slaughtering orcs whenever I got the chance.

A dozen orcs had fallen when suddenly they all retreated, backing off. Surprised and a little suspicious we begun running towards the small safety when I felt something approaching. Turning around to look, I gasped for air. Hundreds of archers were taking their places, many of them with burning arrows, getting ready to launch a cascade that sure would kill those who were left.

"Aragorn! Take hide!" I shouted to him, seeing how he threw a glance backwards and then dove in between a large rock that had fallen from the explosion of the Deeping Wall.

I ran towards that spot as well, as it was the closest hide-out. A few feet away from my goal I heard and saw arrows landing all around me. Pain went through my body and I fell forwards, down on the ground. An arrow stung out from my back, and never had I felt such pain, my arm seemed like a scratch compared to this. My vision darkened, though I felt a hand grasp my unwounded arm and drag me into the safety behind the rock.