Hi all! Just another quick fic here. I've had the idea of doing something with this song for a while but wasn't sure what to do. I got an idea and well *poof* here it is. I'm sticking this up for now but I'm not entirely sure if I'm happy with the last chunk. I might tear this all apart and rebuild it over the Christmas Holidays when I have some down time. Stupid exams. Anyway, I'd like to know what you think. Polite helpful suggestions are always welcome. Also if someone could send me the html code for indenting the first line of a paragraph that'd be super-duper-fantastic! Thanks!
I'd also like to send out a giant thank you to Misura for all the wonderful reviews. Thanks a lot! Hope you like this one! Anyway, on with the story!
OMI POV
"So, are all of you in?"
We all turn our heads and nod to Manx.
"Good. Here is your information and instructions. You move tomorrow night. Good luck. I'll see myself out."
We listen to the click of her heels as she ascends the metal staircase. None of us see her leave though, we're all too busy reading the folders we've been given. I finish reading and turn around and start typing on the computer. I hack and get the floor plans for the building where our target will be.
We open shop the next day as normal. I go to school as normal. I come back and work in the shop until closing fighting off fan girls like normal. We work on the plan of attack like normal. It's the same thing over and over everyday. My days use to be different. I use to go out and meet him. We don't meet anymore. We haven't met for some months now.
The names and faces of our victims change each time but I see the same thing. The same faceless, nameless person who has done something against society and has to pay for it. Sometimes I feel like things will never change. I don't think things are allowed to change for me. I'm stuck living like this forever. I can't turn back knowing what I know.
Fed up with my destiny
And this place of no return
I stand on the top of the ridge and watch the building burn. The others are waiting for me. I should go but I don't want to just yet. Schuldig was there. That means maybe he was there too. If he was then maybe he'll find me. We're through but I just want to see him again. Just to talk. Just to see if he has been thinking the same thing as me.
Think I'll take another day
And slowly watch it burn
I'm so engrossed by my own thoughts and memories that I don't hear being approached from behind.
"It's nice to look at isn't it?"
I start and turn around at the new voice. I relax upon seeing who it is. I shouldn't relax though. He's the enemy. But it's a reflex I acquired from our time together.
I nod. "Hai, it is."
He comes and stands beside me. His small frame and features are accented by the light of the fire. His midnight blue hair takes on an almost black appearance and red and yellow dance in his dark eyes. My fingers twitch at remembering the feel of his hair between them. The smooth, softness of his skin.
It doesn't really matter how the time goes by
Cause I still remember you and I
And that beautiful goodbye
I remember the night we ran into each other. It was at a club that neither of us should have been at. Fake ID's can be wonderful things. I'm still not entirely convinced you got in on your own. I thought I had seen Schuldig earlier that evening.
We found each other on the dance floor, at the bar and just about everywhere else that evening. For some reason we just couldn't escape each other no matter how hard we tried. Or were we really trying at all? We found each other for the last time on the dance floor and danced with each for the rest of the night. Your slender arms around me felt like heaven. Our hips swayed to the beat and ground together when it was called for. We left after the grinding became too much. We left and escaped to an empty alley to indulge in each other. Drunkenness erasing any thoughts of it being wrong and any thoughts that of being enemies arising. Drunkenness prevented much from happening.
Afterwards we walked the streets talking and giggling.
We staggered through these empty streets
Laughing arm in arm
We sat in a park under a tree and looked up at the stars. You told me many things then. You told me that you had been watching me for some time. You told me you liked my smile, my positive attitude towards everything. You told me that you thought you loved me. I accepted that. I told you that I had always admired you but that I didn't love you yet. I had been far too in love with someone else but they didn't love me back. They had just scoffed at me and told me I was too young to know what love was and that I was too young for them. My heart had been torn out and handed back to me after being jumped on a few times and flattened.
The night had made a mess of me
Your confession kept me warm
I should have been cold sitting there with you under that tree. Both of us should have been since we were dressed in club clothes. But with your arms around me I couldn't feel the night chill. We stayed there for as long as we could. Parting only when we had too. We promised to see each other again after that and we did. We did for a long time. That long time ended a couple of months ago.
"Have you been well?" I ask.
"Hai. You?"
"Hai."
There's an awkward pause between us. There are so many things we want to say but are afraid too. I decide to take the first step.
"So you met anyone lately?"
I see him start, surprised that I would actually ask that.
"No. Have you?"
"No."
We continue to stare at the fire.
"Do you ever think about us?" I ask quietly.
And I don't really miss you, I just need to know
Do you ever think of you and I
He turns and stares at me. His eyes wide, surprised that I have asked the question that I know both of us have been thinking.
"Sometimes," he answers. "Mostly about how we left."
And that beautiful goodbye
We continue to stand and watch the fire. I feel oddly at peace. You continue to stand by me watching the fire looking very relaxed. Are you thinking the same things I am? Are you remembering that time we were at Villa White and lay before the fire for hours? How we took comfort in each other that night?
When I see you now
I wonder how
I am unaware of how much time passes before he turns are starts to leave.
I could've watched you walk away
My hand darts out and grabs him by the wrist.
"Nagi, wait please."
He stops but doesn't look at me.
"Why?" he asks.
"Huh?"
"Why do you want me to wait? Why do you want me to stay? We're over O.....Bombay. We've been over for a while now. Why can't you just accept that?"
I let my hand drop from his wrist and hang my head.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what happened. I'm sorry for making you mad. I'm sorry for what I did to you. I never wanted to hurt you."
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
"I know."
I hear him walk through the bushes and he disappears into the trees.
For that beautiful goodbye
~~~~
It has been several days since I last saw Nagi. I've experienced a mix of emotions since that point. Relief knowing that he knows I didn't mean to hurt him. That I didn't want him to leave.
I regret what happened. I made some bad, rash decisions and it cost me dearly. I lost Nagi and I lost a friend. He left the Koneko because of me. He left and moved into another building. He still comes for missions and still works in the shop, although he tries to avoid me when we have the same shift. I don't blame him. I was cruel to him. I purposely hit him at his weakest point and tried to manipulate him with it. I regret what I did but despite my apologizes he doesn't want anything to do with me. So now I keep my mouth shut.
In these days of no regrets
I keep mine to myself
Ken POV
The whole team has been in turmoil lately. With one member moved out and the other three sulking, brooding and almost mourning the loss of a loved one, not much is going well. I'm not surprised though. Nothing has been working out lately. Omi and Yoji aren't talking to each other, neither are Aya and I. We broke up three days ago. I thought we were so happy together but apparently I was wrong. He wasn't happy he told me. I asked him if he ever was, big mistake. His eyes drew into narrow slits and he glared at me.
"It's over Ken," he told me and then turned and left the shop for the rest of the day. I didn't know it at the time but Omi had witnessed the entire thing. He comforted me. I feel better now. I've taken all those feelings I've had for Aya and tucked them away. They are no longer for him any more. They're going to be for someone else who will love me and be happy with me.
And all the things we never said
I can say for someone else
Maybe then I will be happy too. The two of us will be happy and we'll be together forever! Just like I thought Aya and I would always be together. I honestly thought we had something special together but I guess I was wrong. We had some rough spots but I always tried to smooth them over. No relationship is perfect but we tried to make things work. Why did he let everything we did go to waste?
Cause nothing lasts forever, but we always try
And I just can't help but wonder why
We let it pass us by
I glance up from sweeping the floor to see Aya standing at the work bench. He still looks beautiful to me. I don't think I'll ever stop caring for him not even if I tried. I wonder what would have happened if I had chased after him when he stormed out of the shop after telling me that it was over between us.
When I see you now
I wonder how
I could've watched you walk away
I'm sorry Aya. I suppose I let you down somehow. I wish I could have been a better boyfriend to you. Maybe if I had followed you out of the store we would still be together. Maybe if I had made you talk to me and told me what was wrong and why you weren't happy being with me, maybe if I had done that we would still be together. Is that why you still won't even glance in my direction? Why you ask Omi or Yoji to do the things that I'm better at? Was I suppose to chase you Aya? Was I suppose to run out that door after you and make everything better? I couldn't do that though. I couldn't because I didn't know what was wrong to begin with.
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
For that beautiful goodbye
~~~~
Aya, Ken, Omi, Nagi POV
I shift further under my blankets and hug my pillow tighter. I miss your warmth being near me. I miss your arms around me, hugging me, pulling me closer to you. What can I do to get that feeling back?
Baby what can I do
All I get from you
I feel the tears start to spill over. It's not the first time I shed tears over you. It probably won't be the last either.
And sometimes I cry
It's a fools lullaby
I sob into my pillow that for some reason still holds your smell. I cry letting my body shake with each sob. I feel myself grow sleepy from crying. My final thought before drifting off to sleep is how can I tell you I miss you?
And sometimes I cry
It's just a fools lullaby
~Owari~
Well that's that. I don't know if I resolved anything in this. Perhaps I will need to think of a second chapter....if anyone has any suggestions let me know! I do believe my email is available so if you do email me though please but the title of this fic as the subject otherwise I may end up deleting you! Oops! Anyway, thanks for reading! Have a happy holiday everyone!
I'd also like to send out a giant thank you to Misura for all the wonderful reviews. Thanks a lot! Hope you like this one! Anyway, on with the story!
OMI POV
"So, are all of you in?"
We all turn our heads and nod to Manx.
"Good. Here is your information and instructions. You move tomorrow night. Good luck. I'll see myself out."
We listen to the click of her heels as she ascends the metal staircase. None of us see her leave though, we're all too busy reading the folders we've been given. I finish reading and turn around and start typing on the computer. I hack and get the floor plans for the building where our target will be.
We open shop the next day as normal. I go to school as normal. I come back and work in the shop until closing fighting off fan girls like normal. We work on the plan of attack like normal. It's the same thing over and over everyday. My days use to be different. I use to go out and meet him. We don't meet anymore. We haven't met for some months now.
The names and faces of our victims change each time but I see the same thing. The same faceless, nameless person who has done something against society and has to pay for it. Sometimes I feel like things will never change. I don't think things are allowed to change for me. I'm stuck living like this forever. I can't turn back knowing what I know.
Fed up with my destiny
And this place of no return
I stand on the top of the ridge and watch the building burn. The others are waiting for me. I should go but I don't want to just yet. Schuldig was there. That means maybe he was there too. If he was then maybe he'll find me. We're through but I just want to see him again. Just to talk. Just to see if he has been thinking the same thing as me.
Think I'll take another day
And slowly watch it burn
I'm so engrossed by my own thoughts and memories that I don't hear being approached from behind.
"It's nice to look at isn't it?"
I start and turn around at the new voice. I relax upon seeing who it is. I shouldn't relax though. He's the enemy. But it's a reflex I acquired from our time together.
I nod. "Hai, it is."
He comes and stands beside me. His small frame and features are accented by the light of the fire. His midnight blue hair takes on an almost black appearance and red and yellow dance in his dark eyes. My fingers twitch at remembering the feel of his hair between them. The smooth, softness of his skin.
It doesn't really matter how the time goes by
Cause I still remember you and I
And that beautiful goodbye
I remember the night we ran into each other. It was at a club that neither of us should have been at. Fake ID's can be wonderful things. I'm still not entirely convinced you got in on your own. I thought I had seen Schuldig earlier that evening.
We found each other on the dance floor, at the bar and just about everywhere else that evening. For some reason we just couldn't escape each other no matter how hard we tried. Or were we really trying at all? We found each other for the last time on the dance floor and danced with each for the rest of the night. Your slender arms around me felt like heaven. Our hips swayed to the beat and ground together when it was called for. We left after the grinding became too much. We left and escaped to an empty alley to indulge in each other. Drunkenness erasing any thoughts of it being wrong and any thoughts that of being enemies arising. Drunkenness prevented much from happening.
Afterwards we walked the streets talking and giggling.
We staggered through these empty streets
Laughing arm in arm
We sat in a park under a tree and looked up at the stars. You told me many things then. You told me that you had been watching me for some time. You told me you liked my smile, my positive attitude towards everything. You told me that you thought you loved me. I accepted that. I told you that I had always admired you but that I didn't love you yet. I had been far too in love with someone else but they didn't love me back. They had just scoffed at me and told me I was too young to know what love was and that I was too young for them. My heart had been torn out and handed back to me after being jumped on a few times and flattened.
The night had made a mess of me
Your confession kept me warm
I should have been cold sitting there with you under that tree. Both of us should have been since we were dressed in club clothes. But with your arms around me I couldn't feel the night chill. We stayed there for as long as we could. Parting only when we had too. We promised to see each other again after that and we did. We did for a long time. That long time ended a couple of months ago.
"Have you been well?" I ask.
"Hai. You?"
"Hai."
There's an awkward pause between us. There are so many things we want to say but are afraid too. I decide to take the first step.
"So you met anyone lately?"
I see him start, surprised that I would actually ask that.
"No. Have you?"
"No."
We continue to stare at the fire.
"Do you ever think about us?" I ask quietly.
And I don't really miss you, I just need to know
Do you ever think of you and I
He turns and stares at me. His eyes wide, surprised that I have asked the question that I know both of us have been thinking.
"Sometimes," he answers. "Mostly about how we left."
And that beautiful goodbye
We continue to stand and watch the fire. I feel oddly at peace. You continue to stand by me watching the fire looking very relaxed. Are you thinking the same things I am? Are you remembering that time we were at Villa White and lay before the fire for hours? How we took comfort in each other that night?
When I see you now
I wonder how
I am unaware of how much time passes before he turns are starts to leave.
I could've watched you walk away
My hand darts out and grabs him by the wrist.
"Nagi, wait please."
He stops but doesn't look at me.
"Why?" he asks.
"Huh?"
"Why do you want me to wait? Why do you want me to stay? We're over O.....Bombay. We've been over for a while now. Why can't you just accept that?"
I let my hand drop from his wrist and hang my head.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what happened. I'm sorry for making you mad. I'm sorry for what I did to you. I never wanted to hurt you."
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
"I know."
I hear him walk through the bushes and he disappears into the trees.
For that beautiful goodbye
~~~~
It has been several days since I last saw Nagi. I've experienced a mix of emotions since that point. Relief knowing that he knows I didn't mean to hurt him. That I didn't want him to leave.
I regret what happened. I made some bad, rash decisions and it cost me dearly. I lost Nagi and I lost a friend. He left the Koneko because of me. He left and moved into another building. He still comes for missions and still works in the shop, although he tries to avoid me when we have the same shift. I don't blame him. I was cruel to him. I purposely hit him at his weakest point and tried to manipulate him with it. I regret what I did but despite my apologizes he doesn't want anything to do with me. So now I keep my mouth shut.
In these days of no regrets
I keep mine to myself
Ken POV
The whole team has been in turmoil lately. With one member moved out and the other three sulking, brooding and almost mourning the loss of a loved one, not much is going well. I'm not surprised though. Nothing has been working out lately. Omi and Yoji aren't talking to each other, neither are Aya and I. We broke up three days ago. I thought we were so happy together but apparently I was wrong. He wasn't happy he told me. I asked him if he ever was, big mistake. His eyes drew into narrow slits and he glared at me.
"It's over Ken," he told me and then turned and left the shop for the rest of the day. I didn't know it at the time but Omi had witnessed the entire thing. He comforted me. I feel better now. I've taken all those feelings I've had for Aya and tucked them away. They are no longer for him any more. They're going to be for someone else who will love me and be happy with me.
And all the things we never said
I can say for someone else
Maybe then I will be happy too. The two of us will be happy and we'll be together forever! Just like I thought Aya and I would always be together. I honestly thought we had something special together but I guess I was wrong. We had some rough spots but I always tried to smooth them over. No relationship is perfect but we tried to make things work. Why did he let everything we did go to waste?
Cause nothing lasts forever, but we always try
And I just can't help but wonder why
We let it pass us by
I glance up from sweeping the floor to see Aya standing at the work bench. He still looks beautiful to me. I don't think I'll ever stop caring for him not even if I tried. I wonder what would have happened if I had chased after him when he stormed out of the shop after telling me that it was over between us.
When I see you now
I wonder how
I could've watched you walk away
I'm sorry Aya. I suppose I let you down somehow. I wish I could have been a better boyfriend to you. Maybe if I had followed you out of the store we would still be together. Maybe if I had made you talk to me and told me what was wrong and why you weren't happy being with me, maybe if I had done that we would still be together. Is that why you still won't even glance in my direction? Why you ask Omi or Yoji to do the things that I'm better at? Was I suppose to chase you Aya? Was I suppose to run out that door after you and make everything better? I couldn't do that though. I couldn't because I didn't know what was wrong to begin with.
If I let you down
Please forgive me now
For that beautiful goodbye
~~~~
Aya, Ken, Omi, Nagi POV
I shift further under my blankets and hug my pillow tighter. I miss your warmth being near me. I miss your arms around me, hugging me, pulling me closer to you. What can I do to get that feeling back?
Baby what can I do
All I get from you
I feel the tears start to spill over. It's not the first time I shed tears over you. It probably won't be the last either.
And sometimes I cry
It's a fools lullaby
I sob into my pillow that for some reason still holds your smell. I cry letting my body shake with each sob. I feel myself grow sleepy from crying. My final thought before drifting off to sleep is how can I tell you I miss you?
And sometimes I cry
It's just a fools lullaby
~Owari~
Well that's that. I don't know if I resolved anything in this. Perhaps I will need to think of a second chapter....if anyone has any suggestions let me know! I do believe my email is available so if you do email me though please but the title of this fic as the subject otherwise I may end up deleting you! Oops! Anyway, thanks for reading! Have a happy holiday everyone!