One Last Breath
AN: As you may have noticed, this fic is much different than most of my others. It's kind of an…experimental project, I suppose. It requires a certain mindset, research, and letting myself sink into borderline depression to write it. But I'm determined to do it right. I need to do it right. But this means I can only update it when I can. Chapters will be slow, but hopefully, the overall story will prevail. I only have a vague idea where I'm heading, but that's never stopped me before. Thank you to all those that have read So Far Down and Faster. FYI – yes, these titles all come from the Creed song in one way or the other, but it's only because the song fit the story arc after the fact.
Rated R for mature themes, drug use, and violence - but nothing worse than what you'd find in a Rated R movie. Thank you for reading. Love, Rose
Chapter 1 - Sinking
Maybe it was that he'd been on her mind – ever since the luncheon a few days ago. She didn't know how she knew he was there. She just did. Somehow, though she hadn't seen or heard from him in three long years, she could still sense his presence. Even now, in her sleep.
"Heero?" She blinked her eyes open and caught the familiar silhouette against the window. Or, she thought it was his… But her vision had played tricks on her before.
The curtain billowed; the window was open, and she blinked again. There was at least someone in her room. Her hand found the locket on her nightstand - the one with the panic button disguised as a pearl inset. Pressed, it would alert the requisite member of the special forces that served as one of her guards on every shift. She palmed it as she sat up.
He stood there, looking like he'd been standing there forever, but she knew she had only been asleep about an hour. Relena shook her head. The sound of her heart thudded loudly in her ears.
"Heero." The man across the room didn't look up when she called his name.
"Heero?" She threw the covers aside and climbed from her bed. Her eyes, once adjusted to the darkness, could see him more clearly in the dim lighting. His hair was limp, almost plastered to his face, his shoulders hunched, and his fists trembled at his sides. It was Heero but at the same time…
"What's wrong?" She whispered, stepping closer until she grew near enough to touch him. He shivered and a sheen of sweat covered his sunken cheeks. Relena held out a hand, but he flinched away.
"Call them off."
"What?"
"You heard me. Call. Them. Off." His voice was a raspy growl and she had to strain to hear it. The blue eyes in which she used to find strength were wide and searching, like the frightened eyes of a caged animal.
"I don't know what you're talking about. You're…Heero?"
Her words were drowned out by his painful gasps for breath. Another tremor wracked his thin frame and he launched himself away from the wall. "You have them follow me, don't you? You couldn't leave me alone."
Relena backed away, still clutching the locket tightly. "There's no one following you. It's okay. Please, calm down."
He didn't seem to hear her. He just kept moving forward. "You just can't stand that I could live on my own without being on your leash. Without waiting for your table scraps."
"Heero, you're not making any sense. Please, just try to calm down. Tell me…" She offered her hand to him again. "Let me help you."
"Help me? You don't want to help me. If you wanted to help me, you'd have left me alone, instead of hiring them to follow me around!" His voice rose to an angry level. "Did you think I wouldn't figure it out?"
"Heero…" She choked on the word. The way he was behaving…. "What happened to you?" What did you take?
"What happened to me?" He advanced towards her again; his tone became low and menacing. "Do you really want to know, Relena?"
She took another step back; her heart racing, she tried to at least keep the outward appearance of being calm. She turned the locket over in her right hand. "Heero…" She stumbled in her retreat.
He grabbed her left wrist and jerked her forward. "Do you really want to know?"
Pain shot through her limb and lodged in her chest. Tears pricked her eyes. "You're hurting me. Please."
He yanked her arm around her body at an unnatural angle before pinning it against her back. "Am I? Am I supposed to care that I'm hurting you, Relena?" He tightened his grip. She gasped. Her muscle screamed like it was being torn away from the bone. But this was Heero… If she could just calm him down, he'd stop. He'd be okay.
"Heero, tell me what it is you're taking." She hissed as the pain intensified. "I know this isn't like you. Tell me. What's wrong?"
His lip formed a snarl and he wrenched her arm higher. He shoved her back against the wall. Her wrist screamed as something gave way, and she couldn't hold back her cry.
Heero's other hand flew up and cut it off - at her throat. "Shut up. They'll hear you." Her eyes widened as he finally let go of her mangled arm to tighten both hands around her neck. Instinctively, her fingers shot up pry them off, her lungs already demanding air. The locket dropped from her hand, but the chain held around her wrist. She scratched and clawed, but he was too strong.
He slammed her head back against the wall, and the world sparked in front of her eyes. He was raving about shadows, his eyes jerking in quick, unnatural movements. Her chest burned and a hazy, buzzing sound invaded her ears. The world was growing dim….
Her hands slipped from his, and she felt the cool metal of the locket chain against her fingers. She tried to pull the medallion into her palm, but she couldn't feel her fingertips. Dark liquid formed a pool with blackened hands. They reached out and caught her, dragging her into the murky pond. Relena kicked, and opened her mouth to scream! But it was lost as the icy water roared inside.
She was drowning….
* * * * * *
Trowa sipped cold coffee from his plastic mug and blinked against the drowsiness that pulled at his eyes. He hated the night shift, but it was his week on duty. He'd be back on his usual early morning shift next week, and wouldn't have to play midnight sentinel for another month. He stifled a yawn and shifted his weight to the other foot.
His ears pricked up. The Preventer held his breath and focused his hearing. A soft thud sounded from Relena's room. He stood up from the wall and crossed the hall, pausing outside her door. It's probably not anything. But I should check on her.
He paused with his hand on the doorknob, listening for any other signs that something was amiss. He hated to intrude on her privacy…
"Relena?"
That's when the alarm went off on his hip. Ice formed down the length of his spine. He tossed his coffee mug aside and drew his gun. He tried the door, but it was locked. He backed up two steps, raised his right leg, then slammed the ball of his foot into the wood. It broke the lock and crashed open. Trowa charged inside.
"Hands up. Step back. Let her go!" His right hand found the switch on the wall while keeping his weapon trained on the shadowy intruder. Light erupted. Relena's body slid to the ground. The Preventer couldn't tell if she was breathing. He opened his mouth to call out when a wild animal leapt at him. The gun skittered across the floor. Trowa fell back under the weight of his assailant, talons digging into the flesh of his neck. He wrestled, and tried to pull the man's fingers away. But they held tight with superhuman strength.
"I should have known you'd help her!" A familiar voice snarled. Trowa would have gasped if he could have gotten enough air. The figure had changed, waning thinner, and he hadn't gotten a good look at the eyes. But the voice… It was unmistakable. He dug into the hands around his throat and wrenched them back with a sickening pop! He shoved his knee up into Heero's gut and used the leverage to throw him over. Trowa scrambled to his feet and searched the floor with his eyes for the gun. Under the bed.
Heero rolled up into a crouched position, ready to strike. Trowa scowled. His duty was to protect Relena. If he had to kill his former comrade to do so, he would. But he'd need his gun. He flipped up, back, and over the bed, placing an obstruction between them. Without a second to lose, he ducked to the floor in search of the weapon.
"Coward." The dark-haired man called out as he stalked around the side of the bed. Trowa found the gun and stood up, aiming at Heero's chest. The former Zero pilot smirked; his eyes darted in jerky movements as he advanced.
He's on something. Increased reaction time, indifference to pain – I know I broke at least one of his fingers. It's a stimulant of some sort. In hand to hand, I'd stand an even chance with him, but not if he's out of his mind.
Trowa set his jaw and pressed his finger against the trigger. Heero continued to move forward.
"Lieutenant! We heard -- " Two guards rushed into the room from the hallway.
The Preventer's eyes glanced away for a split second. But it was long enough. Heero's leg lashed out and kicked the gun from his hand. Superficial pain stabbed his wrist and Trowa ducked as the former Zero pilot threw a right cross. He charged the shorter man, finally knocking him back against the wall.
"Lieutenant!"
The Preventer pinned his assailant's shoulders. "Don't shoot! Errrrrrrrah!" He strained as Heero fought to break the hold. The Zero pilot balled both hands together and thrust them into Trowa's stomach. Pain stole the breath from his lungs, and he couldn't keep his hold.
"What should we do?" Shaky voices called out from behind him as the winded Preventer blocked another assault.
"Check…for a pulse," he gasped out.
"Yes sir!"
The attacker lunged at him again and they locked arms. Heero had the advantage, and tried to pin Trowa against the wall but the Preventer fought back, trying to regain the upper hand. Heero's hands closed around Trowa's neck.
"You're going to die," his old friend hissed between his teeth.
"If anyone else. Is going to die," Trowa gasped. "It's going. To be you."
"Sir, she's alive, sir!"
Trowa's eyes narrowed. "You're lucky. I'm not going to have to kill you." He struck out, butting his head against the Zero pilot's hard skull. The assailant staggered back just two steps, but it was all the ground the acrobat needed. He whipped the set of handcuffs from his pocket and grabbed for Heero's right arm. His left fist slammed into his attacker's jaw. One cuff clicked around the right wrist. The Preventer yanked hard, twisting the arm at an upwards angle; Heero's reflexes kicked in, and he brought up his left hand to try to spin out of the hold. But Trowa was just as fast.
He seized the enemy's fist as the shorter man spun around. Using his height to his advantage, Trowa jerked the arm down and latched the other cuff in place. The Preventer anticipated the retaliatory roundhouse kick and dodged, throwing himself to the floor to sweep his captive's feet. Heero pitched forward and landed face down. Trowa dove over him, pinning him to the floor.
"I need a leg and collar." The Preventer called out to one of the other guards, ignoring the taste of blood in his mouth. And the throbbing in his head. He leaned his whole body weight down on the struggling captive. "NOW!" A subordinate guard dashed out the door at his commanding officer's voice.
"I'll kill you, Barton."
"You lay another finger on Relena, and you won't live to regret it."
"Here you are, Lieutenant, sir!" The guard returned with the restraints.
Trowa took the leg irons and collar cuff and wrestled to clamp them around Heero's neck and ankles. One of the other guards assisted in keeping the captive's legs pinned down.
"Heero Yuy. You're under arrest for assault and attempted murder of the Vice Foreign Minister. Anything you say…"
* * * * * *
Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law…
Stark whiteness hit her eyes and she felt the need to cough. The action stung her chest.
Relena blinked and tried to focus on something. Shapes blurred then came together; Trowa's voice became clearer.
"You have a right to an attorney…"
"Troooowah." Her voice broke and sounded more like a groan. The effort razed the back of her throat, so she swallowed. The dull ache turned sharp; it felt like when she had strep as a child – the pain burned all the way down. She flinched and brought a hand up to her neck.
"Relena, just lay still. We've got medics coming. I--"
"No." Her voice sounded a little less wheezy, though it was no less painful. She pushed herself off the ground and into a sitting position. She looked at the man on the floor beneath her guard – shackled like a criminal.. Trowa's gaze met hers, and she pleaded with him from across the room. He turned away.
"Please…." Her eyes grew damp and hot. She never wanted to see him like this, never wanted this for him. He needed help, not jail.
"Relena, he almost killed you."
She bowed her head and stared at the floor. "Please…." Was all she could manage.
He let out a loud growl before snarling orders to his subordinates. "Call back Preventer. Tell them it was a false alarm. Someone get her some water, and bandages, and some pain killer – she's going to hurt something awful in the morning. You're all under direct orders from the Foreign Ministry department. If ONE WORD gets out about this incident, I'll see ALL of you thrown into the brig. Do I make myself clear?"
"Yes sir!" The voices sounded in a chorus as his men snapped Trowa a smart salute. Then they scurried like rats from the room.
When everyone was gone, he spoke from his position still pinning down the former Zero pilot. Heero had, at least, stopped struggling.
"What do you want me to do?"
"There's…a number…. A center…f-f-f…" She swallowed again, the discomfort tore through her neck and seemed to lodge in her chest – near her heart. She couldn't finish. Her voice was gone.
"In your planner?"
He looked up and she met his gaze and nodded. He quickly glanced away once again.
"I'll take care of it," Trowa said and finally stood. Heero stayed in place.
Her eyes watched the tall guard exit the room before traveling down to the dark-haired boy lying a few feet away. Even now, she felt the urge to run her fingers through his disheveled locks, and hold him like she had in that bunker when he collapsed. She wanted to comfort him, to take away whatever pain had driven him to this madness.
But she knew – had already learned – this was a battle that only he could fight. And all she could do was hope. And pray.
She did both; and one more: she loved.