-Chapter 12: Lies-
Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear Sealed with lies through so many tears Lost from within, pursuing the end I fight for the chance to be lied to again
I looked up only to see Parker McKenzie standing over me. "You're all wet. And you're laying in the snow," she said. I closed my eyes. Parker sat beside me. "Gordo, I read about what happened. Do you wanna talk?" "No Parker, I want to lay here and die of pneumonia," I responded bitterly. Not strong enough to live anymore, not good enough to die.
You will never be strong enough You will never be good enough You were never conceived in love You will not rise above
"Gordo, I think you need to talk to someone," Parker tried again. God she was persistent. Maybe that's why I liked her in seventh grade. "No I don't Parker. I need to think," I told her. "About what?" she asked. "About the pain burning a hole in me and what I did to deserve it."
They'll never see I'll never be I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger Burning deep inside of me
"You miss them. You didn't do anything. Stuff happens," Parker said. I opened my eyes and continued to stare at the dark sky. Will the night ever end? Will I ever see light again? Ever know happiness? The tree about me was bare and dead. Like my life. Only the tree was lucky. In spring it was reborn.
But through my tears breaks a blinding light Birthing a dawn to this endless night Arms outstretched, awaiting me An open embrace upon a bleeding tree
"Parker, you've got no idea what I'm going through right now. This goes way beyond missing them. I ignored Miranda and Lizzie died in my arms. I could have prevented both of them. Don't you see this is all my fault?!"
Rest in me and I'll comfort you I have lived and I died for you Abide in me and I vow to you I will never forsake you
Parker stood up and held out a hand. "C'mon, get up. I'm taking you to see the councilor," she said. "No. No more counseling. If I lay here long enough, then I'll wake up."
They'll never see I'll never be I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger Burning deep inside of me
"This isn't a dream," Parker told me. But it couldn't be real. What did Parker McKenzie know?
They'll never see I'll never be I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger Burning deep inside of me
Well, whatever she knew, she was right. It wasn't a dream. They were gone, and I'd have to deal with it myself. What a Hanukkah present, losing my best friend and my girlfriend. I hate December.
Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear Sealed with lies through so many tears Lost from within, pursuing the end I fight for the chance to be lied to again
I looked up only to see Parker McKenzie standing over me. "You're all wet. And you're laying in the snow," she said. I closed my eyes. Parker sat beside me. "Gordo, I read about what happened. Do you wanna talk?" "No Parker, I want to lay here and die of pneumonia," I responded bitterly. Not strong enough to live anymore, not good enough to die.
You will never be strong enough You will never be good enough You were never conceived in love You will not rise above
"Gordo, I think you need to talk to someone," Parker tried again. God she was persistent. Maybe that's why I liked her in seventh grade. "No I don't Parker. I need to think," I told her. "About what?" she asked. "About the pain burning a hole in me and what I did to deserve it."
They'll never see I'll never be I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger Burning deep inside of me
"You miss them. You didn't do anything. Stuff happens," Parker said. I opened my eyes and continued to stare at the dark sky. Will the night ever end? Will I ever see light again? Ever know happiness? The tree about me was bare and dead. Like my life. Only the tree was lucky. In spring it was reborn.
But through my tears breaks a blinding light Birthing a dawn to this endless night Arms outstretched, awaiting me An open embrace upon a bleeding tree
"Parker, you've got no idea what I'm going through right now. This goes way beyond missing them. I ignored Miranda and Lizzie died in my arms. I could have prevented both of them. Don't you see this is all my fault?!"
Rest in me and I'll comfort you I have lived and I died for you Abide in me and I vow to you I will never forsake you
Parker stood up and held out a hand. "C'mon, get up. I'm taking you to see the councilor," she said. "No. No more counseling. If I lay here long enough, then I'll wake up."
They'll never see I'll never be I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger Burning deep inside of me
"This isn't a dream," Parker told me. But it couldn't be real. What did Parker McKenzie know?
They'll never see I'll never be I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger Burning deep inside of me
Well, whatever she knew, she was right. It wasn't a dream. They were gone, and I'd have to deal with it myself. What a Hanukkah present, losing my best friend and my girlfriend. I hate December.