Chapter 11. Terror on the Trolley
12:36AM. Lemur City. Trolley walkway area or something…
"WHOOOOOOOOOA!!!!" Duo shouted, right out of ARCHFIEND'S hands, and caught on to the edge of the decimated asphalt. "THIIIIIS SUUUUUUUUCKS!!!!"
"HN!!!" As the ground began to lose structure, Heero began to lose his balance....
CRASH!!!!!!!!! Went the ground upon the underground….. uh... floor.
SLAM!!! The Knocked Out ARCHFIEND hit the debris-covered floor.
Then Duo lost his grip and fell... THUD! Duo sounded as he crashed upon the ARCHFIEND'S aching spine.
WHUD!!! Heero landed on Duo's spine.
(Author's note: REMEMBER!!! The Super Taboo Word of the Day is: WHUD!)
"OW!" Heero yelled. "You're friggin' bony!"
"SHUT-UP, LARD-ASS!!" Duo insulted, trying to crawl from under Heero. IT was LIKE futile. Duo tried to get up, but Heero forced him down. "Listen, I like the damn shirt—BUT not THAT much--- Get off! "
"WHATever, Baka. Shut-up." he hissed. "We are RIGHT on top of the ARCHFIEND!!!" Heero whispered. "I think he's out cold…."
Granted, the ARCHFIEND appeared to be knocked out…. for the time being. BUT, they were several feet off the lower level due to ARCHFIEND'S large size and the ruble they all landed upon. The objective for Heero and Duo: get off of the ARCHFIEND and haul ass.
Heero lifted himself over Duo and spoke at a low decibel, "Okay… I'm going first. When I hit the ground, wait a few seconds and follow my lead—got it?"
"Can I have the shirt after----OW!!!"
Heero smacked Duo in the back of the head, "Silence!!!" he muttered. "Moron!!!" Heero was about to make his descent….
Suddenly there was a rumble from underneath the both of them.
Heero arched his brow, "Dude, THAT is NOT gonna get you the shirt, EITHER!!!"
Duo stuttered, "Uh—Uh—It WASN'T m-me….. I—I-It was the….."
"SPARKLES!!!" The ARCHFIEND boomed. He suddenly got up----rolling both boys off of him and into a wall. He turned around and spotted Heero's dazzling shirt. "SPARKLES!!! SPARKLES!!!"
Heero took out the other weapon he found at the decimated warehouse: A Panther Cannon!! A huge anti-tank gun— that probably doesn't exist in real life, but it sounds cool in certain RPGs (*cough* FASA *cough*)….. what?!?
Duo gawked at the HUGE gun. "WHERE THE BLOODY HELL DID YOU HIDE THAT?!?"
Heero smirked, "Editing mistake…. In MY favor."
Duo cheered, "Woo-Hoo!!! Maybe I'll get that shirt due to editing mistakes….." He stood there looking around. He pouted, "D-DAMNNIT!"
Annoyed by the small talk, the ARCHFIEND began to make his move… He was getting that sparkly shirt no matter WHO he had to dismember!!!!
"SPARKLES!!!"
With the help of Duo, and possibly steroids, Heero lifted the HUGE gun and aimed. He and Duo began to pull the large trigger….
"I got your SPARKLES, right here, asshole…" Heero uttered.
"Oh yeeaah! Suck iiiiiiiiiiiit!!!!!" We all know who could've added that.
12:40am. Inside the Trolley. Lemur City Trolley ---- (YOU THINK?!)
"You---You have to be…… LYING!!!!" Quatre stammered. He was in total shock over what Wufei told him. "He's…. being controlled?"
Wufei was attaching the wad of gum to the fuse…. "You know I am not lying… your…. Space Heart-thingy is telling you it's the truth. Tire."
Quatre handed the spare tire to Wufei for him to attach (to WHAT?!?!?). "I WAS right. B-b-ut we should----"
"Our mission is JUST beginning, Quatre." Wufei spoke as he attached the tire to the gum, then he picked up the nail polish…. "I also believe that the Captain may STILL be alive."
Quatre picked up the last piece of the Trolley puzzle…… the (FUCKING) Glow-in-the-dark key chain. "NO WAY!!!" Quatre exclaimed. "This CAN'T be!!!"
Wufei sighed, "Relax. Trowa is a strong person, hopefully he'll be out of the mind control before we can get to the bottom of this-----"
Quatre shook his head and showed Wufei the key chain. It had a key on it.
It read: TROLLEY KEY.
Wufei stared at the key. "You got to be kiddin' me…."
Quatre looked at the massive, constructive mess Wufei had built at the controls and asked, "With all due respect, sir----NO….what the hell is this?!! WHY didn't you just examine the KEY??!"
Wufei shrugged, "I don't know----I was just bored---- I wanted to build some----"
KA-BOOM!!!
An explosion from outside rocked the whole trolley. Both Quatre and Wufei fell to the trolley floor.
"What the heck was THAT?!?!" Quatre clamored, jumping to his feet.
Wufei was already up on his feet. He peered through the trolley door and spotted Heero and Duo climbing out of the GAPING hole in the street. "Those mercs have arrived. Impressive. They like just nuked South Street."
Heero and Duo rushed inside the trolley and collapsed upon the floor. They were out of breath and DAMN lucky to have survived nearly blowing themselves up with that Panther Cannon (owned by FASA…. *cough-cough*).
"Sorry for the inconvenience…." Heero huffed.
"We used this HUGE gun and fucked the ARCHFIEND up!!!" Duo gasped.
"He's dead!?" Wufei asked.
Heero and Duo blinked. They looked at each other, PUZZLED. What the dude?!
"Well… it was a really BIG explosion…" Duo muttered.
"I DIDN'T miss… He's been destroyed…" Heero's voice seemed to get lower and lower. "…?" Cover me, man! I haven't a clue!
What the fuck does he want me to say? Oh! Ohhhhh! Duo nodded, "After we were engulfed in flames and shot through the air… he… got… totally killed..." Or totally pissed.
Excellent. Heero looked back at Quatre and Wufei and affirmed… BARELY, "We… killed the ARCHFIEND… Because-because, uhm… WE…. ARE…THAT………….DAMN……….good."
"Yeah!" Duo added.
Riiiiight. Wufei just stared at them. "That's assuring…" Wufei feigned a smile. He walked over to Quatre and whispered an order, "Let's get the hell out of here, FAST."
"Yes, sir." Quatre headed to the controls… He used the TROLLEY Key.
The TROLLEY is NOW fully operational. (No shit…)
Just as Duo caught his breath, he made a comment about the mass of stuff in the middle of the floor. "SO?! Why did we carry all that other stuff…?"
Quatre looked over at Wufei. Heero gawked at the stuff, and then looked over at Wufei.
"That's a damn good question, Mr. Chang." Heero uttered.
"Uh…. Y'know how Lemur City operates! Stupid, Complicated things to get simple things going! Ha!" He tried to play it cool.
HE FAILED!!!
Quatre rolled his Aquamarine eyes and kept to operating the trolley.
Heero got up from the floor and huffed, "Sounds like SOMEONE didn't know what the HELL he was doing."
Duo perched upon the edge of the bench and laughed, "WHAT A DUMBASS! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Wufei snapped, "Shut-Up, Maxwell!!! You're TWICE the DUMBASS for following MY orders!"
Heero and Quatre bust out laughing. Duo gave the Hidden Dragon the Standing Bird (middle finger) and stormed out of the first car….
A few seconds later, they hear a loud sound in the first car.
(Here goes…)
THUD!!! (squeak-a)
Quatre left the controls and raced past them. Trowa….
Oh shit! Heero also stormed the main car. The need to save his 'zombie bait' was dire.
Wufei was about to go, but…… uhm……. SOMEONE needs to tend to the trolley controls. Yeah, that's it…. AVOID getting your ass THRASHED…. Again.
Duo was speechless. This happens when a person has you by the neck and has lifted you a few feet in the air. Duo's kicking and struggling was futile against the cast iron grip Trowa had on him. He was losing air fast. Just a little more pressure and….
"TROWA!!!" The Tiny Winner shouted from the end of the trolley car. "LET HIM GO!"
"Hss!!!" Trowa turned his head and glared at Quatre. He continued to squeeze.
Did he just…. Hiss at me??!! WTF?!? Quatre was bewildered at his frin's odd behavior.
(Author's note: No seriously. WTF is up with the hissing?!?)
"!!!!" Duo sounded. The Suffocating God of Death became less and less obstinate. Duo's body was becoming numb. His vision was getting blurry…..
"NO!!!" Quatre dashed towards Trowa---only to be passed by Heero.
"This skinny bastard is DEAD!!!" Heero took out a Fireman's Axe (WHERE is this FREAK hiding these THINGS??!?!) and got ready to chop Trowa down to size.
Trowa smirked and suddenly lowered Duo and placed him in front as an instant shield. Heero stopped mid swing----- just a CENTIMETER from Duo's skull.
"Uh….. WHAT?!" Heero stammered realizing he almost killed his alley and friend.
"…" Trowa kicked Heero in the stomach and snatched the axe out of his hand—by the blade. Slinging Duo to the aside Trowa grabbed Heero by the neck. "…" He grinned, twirling the axe, to grasp the handle and got ready to chop Heero into pieces.
"STOP!!!!" Quatre screamed grabbing Trowa's lengthy, but deadly arm. "I won't let you---AAAAH!!!"
Trowa slung Quatre across the trolley car and into the separating door.
Seeing the opportunity to play DIRTY, Heero shot his leg into Trowa's crotch.
(SQUEAK!!! CRUNCH!!!)
Trowa dropped Heero. He dropped to his knees and squeaked, "Eeeeeek!"
The Acrobatic Psychopath was KO'ed.
Heero got up and looked over to Quatre who was just mortified at the sight. "Sorry, but it HAD to be done---" Heero shook his head and admitted, "Come to think of it, I really wish I could do more….. Y'know to harm him…. Perhaps kill him… or maim him…. At LEAST…" Heero shrugged his shoulders and headed towards the exit.
Quatre frowned and lowered his head. "I know…."
Duo got up from the floor and made haste to get as far from Trowa's body as possible. "I got an idea: Throw his evil-ass off the fucking train!" He wheezed, rubbing his sore neck. Duo also headed towards the exit.
Quatre slowly turned and followed Duo…
"…"
Quatre quickly turned around and screamed, "!!!!"
Trowa was up and at it again. No one had the common sense to remove the heavy-ass axe from his hands when he was out. Without warning but with deadly intent, Vinyl Fetish Fun Trowa flung the huge axe towards Quatre.
"DUCK!!!" The Nice One shouted as he dropped to the floor---barely missing an axe to the face. "DUCK!!!"
The axe went slicing through the trolley doors …
"DUCKS??!? They got DUCKS in this-----OH---aaaaaayh!!!!" Duo turned around and was TOO stupid to follow such a simple order. Perhaps it was due to the fact he didn't have much oxygen for a while.
So Heero had to yank the Braided Baka to the floor next to him.
"DUCK, Duo, meaning to crouch down or lower one's body to avoid flying axes!" Heero growled in monotone.
"Oh? Ohhhhhh!!!!"
Now the axe was headed for Wufei who wasn't about to get killed and ran to the side. "Oh shiit!!" He yelled.
The axe smashed into the trolley's controls and ALL HELL broke loose….
The trolley car suddenly swerved from side to side and the lights began to flicker. The cast of few found themselves being tossed around like the drunk naked chick at a frat party.
"OW!" Duo yelled as he was thrown from seat to seat. "I-I AM GOING TO PUKE---Urghp!!!"
"OH FUCK THIS!!!" Wufei was trying to climb out of the trolley window but was thrown against the controls----His jacket snagged the brake lever. "AaaaaaaaaRGH!!! I feel like---WHOOOOOA!!!"
The trolley made a REALLY loud noise.
(SCREEEEEETCH-R-R-R-R-RIIIIIIIIIIP!!!)
It jolted in the air----crashing back to the ground and fucking EVERYTHING up inside. The seats went flying around along with the random shit Duo and Wu-Wu gathered earlier.
Heero tried to shield himself from harm but the spice rack proved otherwise. "Oh…sh----"
CRASH!!! It sounded smashing into his back.
Heero went flying into a wall and fainted, "Fuuuuuucking….. Spice raaaaaaack……____________"
Trowa seemed undaunted until a random tire went flying straight to his face. "…OOPH!!!"
The Lanky Bastard was thrown out of the trolley window. Quatre tried to go after him (and do what?!?), the trolley suddenly—and FINALLY crashed.
The last thing Quatre saw was a trolley bench flying towards his head. "Oh, dea--"
SMASH!!!
(AUTHOR'S NOTE: tbc..... (SORRY)