Chapter 5

She shook her head and waved her hand in the air. "No, don't be silly. We broke it off."

"Then, what are you doing here?"

"Wanna get some breakfast? I haven't seen you in, well. it's been a while." She smiled and looped her arm with Sara's. "We've got so much to catch up on." She pulled Sara out the door.

Catherine looked on from her conversation with Grissom in the corridor as she watched Sara be dragged out by Jessie. She noticed that Sara didn't look happy about being dragged and she knew Sara still wasn't feeling too well.

Grissom snapped his fingers to get her attention. "You with me Cath?" He asked impatiently.

She blinked and nodded. "Sure. Where were we?" She hummed and looked at the file in her hand.

"Something on your mind Cath?" He inquired.

Catherine sighed and started walking down the corridor to his office. "I'm worried that's all."

Grissom frowned. "About who?"

"Sara." She whispered, looking around. His face fell at the sound of her name. "What's wrong?" She asked.

"Nothing." He shrugged and entered his office.

Catherine closed the door and sat down. "How's things with you and Jessie?"

He stared at her briefly before removing his glasses and nervously twirling them in his hand. "There is no me and Jessie."

"Oh." She nodded. "What happened? I know you rang and told me she stood you up, but you were so angry."

He sighed and placed his glasses on the desk. "I was angry because she mentioned something.someone." He stammered. "She shouldn't have."

"She stood you up because of a disagreement?"

He shook his head and leaned back in his chair. "No. She stood me up first and then we had a disagreement."

Catherine nodded in understanding, but still needed some blanks filled in. "What was the disagreement about?"

"Jess was talking about her friends and her day when she suddenly mentioned that Sara hadn't called her in days and she said it was like she was avoiding her. I keep telling her that Sara wouldn't do something like that." He rubbed his tired eyes. "Sara wouldn't abandon Jess. They've been friends too long. Why would she suddenly stop talking to Jess? I don't get it."

"This whole disagreement was about Sara?" Catherine asked with a smile.

Grissom narrowed his eyes at her smile. "Well, yeah. I suppose. Not directly, but Jess is worried that she's loosing her friend."

Catherine sighed and leaned into her hand. She couldn't believe he was so blind. What had happened to the flirting and the laughter? "Why were you interested in Jessie?" She asked suddenly.

"Why?" He asked with confusion. Shrugging, she watched him. "I don't really know. She's nice." So is Sara, Catherine added mentally. "She's fun to be around." Sara can be if she's pulled away from work. "She's smart and funny."

"Who are you describing Gil?"

"Jessie. You just asked me what I liked about her." He argued, getting frustrated with the current line of questioning.

Catherine stood up and walked around his desk. She reached behind him for a photo that was on the wall. She placed it in front of him and watched as he leaned forward and looked at it. "In this photo, you can see that everyone brought someone to the Christmas party last year." She pointed at the other photos. "And in those, they did the same, but look closely at them." She instructed.

Grissom noticed straight away, but wasn't going to say anything yet. He saw Nick, Catherine and Warrick, Al, Archie and Bobby, even Greg standing with a girlfriend, friend, wife or husband, apart from two. On one side of the photo, he saw himself and Sara talking to each other, oblivious, like every year, to the photo being taken.

"If you see it, then why are you looking outside the box Grissom? She's right there and you've done nothing but hurt her from day one. She's sat by and watched, supported you every step of the way when you went out to get a life and all you did when she tried, her very first effort to get a life. you punished her so she is left with no one." Catherine watched him. She had to be hurtful for him to see what was right there.

He lightly ran his finger down the glass like so many times before.

Catherine continued, but more softly this time. "I want to tell you something, but you have to promise not to say anything." She waited for him to look at her and when she did, she leaned against his desk and took his hand. "She's lost all faith Gil. She's given up on everyone. She doesn't even believe she deserves happiness."

Suddenly feeling angry, he stood up. "How could she think that Catherine?"

Seeing his reaction, she tried a gentler approach and pushed him back into his chair. "Listen to me ok. Calm down. You can't do anything right now. She's been thinking this for too long."

"Has she spoken to you?" He asked sadly.

Catherine nodded. "She had the flu that went round the hospital last week and I rang her when she didn't turn up for shift. She sounded awful so I went round. I found her collapsed on the floor." She sighed and watched as Grissom's face turned white. "She's lost all trust in her friends Gil. She didn't tell us she was ill. She dealt with it because she didn't want us to get ill. She didn't want to bother us with it."

"She's always thinking about others Cath, you can't hold it against her." He begrudgingly added.

"She doesn't need to keep protecting us. She needs to think about herself. You need to stop chasing other options when you've had option one right in front of you for years."

Grissom stared at her for a long time, trying to think things clearly, but getting nowhere. "I don't chase other options Cath. I don't want to hurt her."

Catherine squeezed his hand. "You already have." She told him sadly.

His eyes closed at her words and he turned away. He couldn't seem to stop hurting Sara. What would it take to make everything he saw in her eyes to go away. She doesn't have feelings for him. She has to believe it's just a crush and nothing would come of it.