The Perfect Stupid Ending
I do not own Harry Potter. If I did, I'd say so, and.well, I would go write books and make money, you see? Yes, of course you do. I strongly doubt J.K. Rowling posts fan fictions.
This short and stupid fan fiction starts in Harry's seventh year, he is battling Voldemort right now, with the hopes to kill him. Enjoy and don't think I'm actually being serious here. OotP spoilers.
---
"Come on, Potter! Are you going to kill me, or not?" Voldemort said with an overly-dramatic and long-lasting laugh.
Harry tightened his grip on his wand. His palms were sweating a great deal. As a matter of fact, they were sweating so much that he dropped his wand and had some trouble picking it up again. He refused to answer Voldemort. Instead he just stared blankly at him and did not interrupt the awkward silence for several minutes, because that's what Harry does.
.
Harry ate a pumpkin pastry.
"ANYWAY." Voldemort said as he dropped his avocado.
He stared at Harry "What do--?"
TAP TAP TAP.
Harry and Voldemort looked around.
"What the hell was that? Wormtail, are you doing that? I told you not to start until I said 'surprise'!"
"What?" Harry said, puzzled.
"Never mind." Voldemort said shaking his head.
TAP TAP TAP.
Voldemort twitched. "Oh, come on now! Bellatrix? Luscious? Have you taken the crumpets out early or something?"
TAP TAP TAP.
"Harry!" a woman's voice called.
Harry looked around, very confused. "Wha--?"
"Harry! Come on now, get up!" the woman called again.
.
"I'm up, I'm up."
Ten-year-old Harry rolled out of bed and rubbed his eyes.
"You best hurry, Harry; you need to get you to the platform early." His mother, Lily, said.
Harry dressed quickly and walked into the kitchen and sat across the kitchen table from James, his father.
"Wow, what a strange dream." Harry said aloud to himself.
"Hmm?" Harry's father said from behind his copy of the Daily Prophet.
"Well, I had this strange, detailed dream. I had several birthdays, friends, enemies, battles with a bad wizard, and witnessed many deaths." Harry replied to his father as he helped himself to a piece of toast.
"Ah. Must be from all those stories I told you about my times at Hogwarts as a boy!"
Harry and his father laughed for the next five minutes.
"Hey, Dad?"
"Yes, Harry"
"Your friend Sirius is alive, right?"
"Yes, Harry."
"Okay. Just checking." Harry said casually.
Harry's father picked up a plate from the table and pushed it toward Harry, "Pumpkin pastry?"
"NOOOOO!" Harry screamed.
Harry's father blinked, "Is something wrong?"
"No, not really." Harry said as he took a pumpkin pastry from the plate.
Harry and his father laughed for the entire time left at breakfast.
Harry's mother came into the kitchen eating an avocado.
Harry ran from the kitchen screaming.
FIN.
Yeah, that's all. Review if you'd like to. Please don't tell me this was stupid and not possible, because I kind of know that already. Thank you for reading. ^_^
I do not own Harry Potter. If I did, I'd say so, and.well, I would go write books and make money, you see? Yes, of course you do. I strongly doubt J.K. Rowling posts fan fictions.
This short and stupid fan fiction starts in Harry's seventh year, he is battling Voldemort right now, with the hopes to kill him. Enjoy and don't think I'm actually being serious here. OotP spoilers.
---
"Come on, Potter! Are you going to kill me, or not?" Voldemort said with an overly-dramatic and long-lasting laugh.
Harry tightened his grip on his wand. His palms were sweating a great deal. As a matter of fact, they were sweating so much that he dropped his wand and had some trouble picking it up again. He refused to answer Voldemort. Instead he just stared blankly at him and did not interrupt the awkward silence for several minutes, because that's what Harry does.
.
Harry ate a pumpkin pastry.
"ANYWAY." Voldemort said as he dropped his avocado.
He stared at Harry "What do--?"
TAP TAP TAP.
Harry and Voldemort looked around.
"What the hell was that? Wormtail, are you doing that? I told you not to start until I said 'surprise'!"
"What?" Harry said, puzzled.
"Never mind." Voldemort said shaking his head.
TAP TAP TAP.
Voldemort twitched. "Oh, come on now! Bellatrix? Luscious? Have you taken the crumpets out early or something?"
TAP TAP TAP.
"Harry!" a woman's voice called.
Harry looked around, very confused. "Wha--?"
"Harry! Come on now, get up!" the woman called again.
.
"I'm up, I'm up."
Ten-year-old Harry rolled out of bed and rubbed his eyes.
"You best hurry, Harry; you need to get you to the platform early." His mother, Lily, said.
Harry dressed quickly and walked into the kitchen and sat across the kitchen table from James, his father.
"Wow, what a strange dream." Harry said aloud to himself.
"Hmm?" Harry's father said from behind his copy of the Daily Prophet.
"Well, I had this strange, detailed dream. I had several birthdays, friends, enemies, battles with a bad wizard, and witnessed many deaths." Harry replied to his father as he helped himself to a piece of toast.
"Ah. Must be from all those stories I told you about my times at Hogwarts as a boy!"
Harry and his father laughed for the next five minutes.
"Hey, Dad?"
"Yes, Harry"
"Your friend Sirius is alive, right?"
"Yes, Harry."
"Okay. Just checking." Harry said casually.
Harry's father picked up a plate from the table and pushed it toward Harry, "Pumpkin pastry?"
"NOOOOO!" Harry screamed.
Harry's father blinked, "Is something wrong?"
"No, not really." Harry said as he took a pumpkin pastry from the plate.
Harry and his father laughed for the entire time left at breakfast.
Harry's mother came into the kitchen eating an avocado.
Harry ran from the kitchen screaming.
FIN.
Yeah, that's all. Review if you'd like to. Please don't tell me this was stupid and not possible, because I kind of know that already. Thank you for reading. ^_^