The DragonBall Z Show Meets Black Sabbath (Remastered)
DISCLAIMER: I do not own DBZ or Black Sabbath... or any of their CD's... though I did make a Black Sabbath CD of my own once. Yeah, I called it The Unholy Dozen! I put 12 of their best songs on it, including Paranoid, Sweet Leaf, and Electric Funeral! As for DBZ, well earlier I had mentioned that I had volumes 1-6 and 8-10 of the DB manga, well I recently purchased 7 and am now starting on the DBZ mangas! So far I've only got 1 and 2 but I should be getting 3 tomm... (FF.net points a spear at me) Oh, umm, sorry. I get carried away sometimes. Like this one time at my friend Stan's birthday party he was upset so I said to my friend Aaron "Hey man we should buy him some po..." (*thwang* ugh!)
SETUP: Normally, this part of The DragonBall Z Show would feature a setup in order to inform readers what is going on before the story starts. However, due to the recent passing of Redneck-Buddhist, this story will proceed without one. Do not worry though, we should have found all of the DragonBalls and wished him back to life by the time you finish this story. Signed - Optimus Prime of The Autobots.
One day, Tenshinhan was in his living room. His speakers were on full blast as "Semi-Charmed Life" by Third Eye Blind played on the radio. And Ten did what came natural to him whenever this song played... he sang!
"I want something else! T' get me thru this, semi-charmed kinda life! Baby baby! I want something else! I'm not listenin' when you say, good byyyyyyyyye!" With the chorus finished, Ten ripped off his shirt and continued singing. "Do do do, do da do do! Do do do, do da do do!"
He is then interrupted by Goku opening the front door and walking in.
Ten, obviously noticing Goku, embarrassingly finished his singing, "Do... do... do..... do da do do?"
After a long pause, Goku finally said, "C'mon Ten, it's time for the concert!"
And so, the gang (Goku, Piccolo, Vegeta, Kuririn, and Tenshinhan) was on their way to see their favorite band in concert... BLACK FUCKING SABBATH!
"Wow," said Goku, "in just a couple of eggshells, we'll be seeing Black Sabbath live!"
"I know," said Piccolo (who was too excited to notice that Goku said 'eggshells' instead of 'minutes') "I can't wait to hear them play Children of The Grave!"
"Yeah," said Kuririn, "and I've never been to a concert before!"
Vegeta let out a proud "harumph" and said, "Screw all of that, I just wanna see Ozzy's cock!"
Everybody stopped in their tracks and focused theirs eyes downward towards Vegeta.
"What!" shouted the Sayain Prince, "I-I heard Ozzy had chickens!"
50 minutes later...
"Welp, here we are!" said Piccolo (whom by the way was dressed in the very same attire he wore when he and Goku went to get their driver's licenses) as they arrived at The Satan City Arena.
And inside the stadium, the band came onto the stage. Ozzy grabbed the mic and shouted, "Awright! Ah 'ou guys fuggin' ready?! Well 'en, fuggin' hit it!" The band then began to play one of their most famous songs.
Outside of the stadium, Kuririn said, "Ooh, it's startin'!"
"Listen," added Tenshinhan, "they're playin' War Pigs!"
Goku walked up to ticket-taker Cell. Cell stopped him and said, "Tickets, please."
"What tickets," asked Goku, "we're not going on an airplane."
Piccolo naturally heard this since he was standing behind Goku. He shouted, "Goku! You didn't buy the tickets!?"
"Wow," said Goku to ticket-taker Cell, "you sounded just like Piccolo when you said that! And you didn't even move your mouth! You're good!"
Piccolo sighed and said, "I said that Goku."
Goku turned around to see Piccolo and said, "Oh. I didn't know you could throw your voice Piccolo."
"I CAN"T," he screamed, "Goku, please tell me you bought the tickets!"
"Hellooooo," Goku said, "Earth to Piccolo! We're going to a rock concert, not on a plane ride! Jeez, shows how much you know!"
"Damn!" shouted Vegeta, "And I wanted to see Ozzy's cock!"
Everybody looked at him again.
"Cock, ummm, err, spaniel! Yeah! That's it! Cocker Spaniel!" he added, trying desperately to save his reputation of being straight.
Piccolo fought back the urge to kill himself (he didn't want to go through THAT crap again), walked up to Cell, and said, "Okay, umm, how much would five adult tickets cost?"
"Adult tickets are one hundred dollars and children's tickets are fifty dollars," responded Cell.
"So, five hundred dollars right?"
"..... Yes."
"Hmmm, could you excuse us for a second?"
"Can I go with you!?"
"Umm, no."
"Awwww."
Piccolo walked back to his friends (feeling lucky to have friends at all after talking to Cell). He huddled them up and said, "Okay, adult tickets are a hundred a piece and we've only got 450!"
"What?" said Tenshinhan, "what're we gonna do?"
"Well," said Piccolo, "We could pass a certain someone off as a child. Then we'd be able to get in."
Vegeta laughed and said, "Kuririn has to pretend to be a child! Ha ha!"
"Oh yeah," said Piccolo, "Kuririn is short too! We can be a child with Vegeta!"
Vegeta just frowned and said, "Th-that's a stupid plan, think of something else!"
"Don't worry, everyone, I have a plan!" exclaimed Goku.
5 minutes later...
"And so," continued Goku (disguised as Ozzy), "then we just walk right up to Cell and say 'Pip pip cheerio, sorry we're late, mate!' He'll HAVE to let us in, 'cuz he'll think we're Black Sabbath!"
Everyone just frowned at him. Finally and sarcastically, Piccolo said, "Oh, that's a brilliant plan, Goku. *gasp* There's just one little thing."
"What's that?"
"THE BAND'S ALREADY ON STAGE!!!!"
"Oh..... is that a problem?"
"YES!!!"
IS THIS THE END?
IS ALL HOPE REALLY LOST?
WILL THE BOYS EVER GET TO MEET BLACK SABBATH?
AND IF THEY DO, WOULD VEGETA AND OZZY MEETING GO SOMETHING LIKE THIS?
"Ozzy, can I see your cock?"
"Eh? Wha' 'e fuck? Oh, awright! Ah go' nu'in be'er t' d'!"
(fade out..... fade in to Goku standing on a stage)
Goku: Ladies and gentlemen, Black Sabbath!
The entire cast of TDBZS cheers as Black Sabbath performs their kick-ass song "Paranoid"!
THEND
Welp, I'm alive again! I hope you liked that... though you probably didn't... 'Cause it wasn't funny. Well, anyway, be sure to read (and review) The Untold Journeys of Yamcha, currently "playing" on fanfiction.net!... though I don't why I even mentioned this because barely anybody would care about it... sigh... I'm so unloved *sob*... but Y'know, I bet some people do care and speaking of people I was once at this party and... (*thwang* ugh!)
And now, a word from the cast about making "The DragonBall Z Show Meets Black Sabbath":
Vegeta: Well, for me the best part was working with Ozzy. He's a god!... O- of course, all that stuff about me wanting to see his cock was just for the cartoon, I'm not really gay! In fact I LOVE women!....... well, men DRESSED as women, maybe...... (panics) Ah! You didn't hear that! BIG BANG ATTACK! (blows up the camera)
Ozzy: Ah'll fuggin' tell ya, i' wa' a fuggin' ga' bein' on Th' Dra'nBall Z Sh'w. Ah fuggin' loved i' man! Th' bes' fuggin' par' was when tha' Vege'a guy... he fuggin' ga'e me a blow jo'! An' i' wa'n't tha' bad. He wa' fuggin' goo' a' i'!
Master Roshi: Hey, you fucking bastard! Stop fucking stealing my fucking material! FUCK!
Ozzy: Wha' 'e fug're you tal'in' abou'?
Master Roshi: I'm the only fucker around here who fucking says "fuck" after every other fucking word!
Ozzy: Ey, 'ou wa'a fuggin' pei'e o' me!?
Master Roshi: I don't fucking want a fucking piece of you, I fucking want the whole fucking thing!
(Ozzy and Roshi begin a fierce fist fight; the rest of the cast gathers around, cheering them on)
Kuririn: Allright! I got my money on Ozzy!
Yamcha: Are you kidding!? Even though all Roshi does in this series is say "fuck" a lot, he's still Kame-sen'nin, the "God of Martial Arts"! Go, Turtle Hermit!
Ozzy: Fug you!
Master Roshi: No, fuck you!
(and the fight goes on...)
Never let the laughter die and DON'T vote Bush in '04.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own DBZ or Black Sabbath... or any of their CD's... though I did make a Black Sabbath CD of my own once. Yeah, I called it The Unholy Dozen! I put 12 of their best songs on it, including Paranoid, Sweet Leaf, and Electric Funeral! As for DBZ, well earlier I had mentioned that I had volumes 1-6 and 8-10 of the DB manga, well I recently purchased 7 and am now starting on the DBZ mangas! So far I've only got 1 and 2 but I should be getting 3 tomm... (FF.net points a spear at me) Oh, umm, sorry. I get carried away sometimes. Like this one time at my friend Stan's birthday party he was upset so I said to my friend Aaron "Hey man we should buy him some po..." (*thwang* ugh!)
SETUP: Normally, this part of The DragonBall Z Show would feature a setup in order to inform readers what is going on before the story starts. However, due to the recent passing of Redneck-Buddhist, this story will proceed without one. Do not worry though, we should have found all of the DragonBalls and wished him back to life by the time you finish this story. Signed - Optimus Prime of The Autobots.
One day, Tenshinhan was in his living room. His speakers were on full blast as "Semi-Charmed Life" by Third Eye Blind played on the radio. And Ten did what came natural to him whenever this song played... he sang!
"I want something else! T' get me thru this, semi-charmed kinda life! Baby baby! I want something else! I'm not listenin' when you say, good byyyyyyyyye!" With the chorus finished, Ten ripped off his shirt and continued singing. "Do do do, do da do do! Do do do, do da do do!"
He is then interrupted by Goku opening the front door and walking in.
Ten, obviously noticing Goku, embarrassingly finished his singing, "Do... do... do..... do da do do?"
After a long pause, Goku finally said, "C'mon Ten, it's time for the concert!"
And so, the gang (Goku, Piccolo, Vegeta, Kuririn, and Tenshinhan) was on their way to see their favorite band in concert... BLACK FUCKING SABBATH!
"Wow," said Goku, "in just a couple of eggshells, we'll be seeing Black Sabbath live!"
"I know," said Piccolo (who was too excited to notice that Goku said 'eggshells' instead of 'minutes') "I can't wait to hear them play Children of The Grave!"
"Yeah," said Kuririn, "and I've never been to a concert before!"
Vegeta let out a proud "harumph" and said, "Screw all of that, I just wanna see Ozzy's cock!"
Everybody stopped in their tracks and focused theirs eyes downward towards Vegeta.
"What!" shouted the Sayain Prince, "I-I heard Ozzy had chickens!"
50 minutes later...
"Welp, here we are!" said Piccolo (whom by the way was dressed in the very same attire he wore when he and Goku went to get their driver's licenses) as they arrived at The Satan City Arena.
And inside the stadium, the band came onto the stage. Ozzy grabbed the mic and shouted, "Awright! Ah 'ou guys fuggin' ready?! Well 'en, fuggin' hit it!" The band then began to play one of their most famous songs.
Outside of the stadium, Kuririn said, "Ooh, it's startin'!"
"Listen," added Tenshinhan, "they're playin' War Pigs!"
Goku walked up to ticket-taker Cell. Cell stopped him and said, "Tickets, please."
"What tickets," asked Goku, "we're not going on an airplane."
Piccolo naturally heard this since he was standing behind Goku. He shouted, "Goku! You didn't buy the tickets!?"
"Wow," said Goku to ticket-taker Cell, "you sounded just like Piccolo when you said that! And you didn't even move your mouth! You're good!"
Piccolo sighed and said, "I said that Goku."
Goku turned around to see Piccolo and said, "Oh. I didn't know you could throw your voice Piccolo."
"I CAN"T," he screamed, "Goku, please tell me you bought the tickets!"
"Hellooooo," Goku said, "Earth to Piccolo! We're going to a rock concert, not on a plane ride! Jeez, shows how much you know!"
"Damn!" shouted Vegeta, "And I wanted to see Ozzy's cock!"
Everybody looked at him again.
"Cock, ummm, err, spaniel! Yeah! That's it! Cocker Spaniel!" he added, trying desperately to save his reputation of being straight.
Piccolo fought back the urge to kill himself (he didn't want to go through THAT crap again), walked up to Cell, and said, "Okay, umm, how much would five adult tickets cost?"
"Adult tickets are one hundred dollars and children's tickets are fifty dollars," responded Cell.
"So, five hundred dollars right?"
"..... Yes."
"Hmmm, could you excuse us for a second?"
"Can I go with you!?"
"Umm, no."
"Awwww."
Piccolo walked back to his friends (feeling lucky to have friends at all after talking to Cell). He huddled them up and said, "Okay, adult tickets are a hundred a piece and we've only got 450!"
"What?" said Tenshinhan, "what're we gonna do?"
"Well," said Piccolo, "We could pass a certain someone off as a child. Then we'd be able to get in."
Vegeta laughed and said, "Kuririn has to pretend to be a child! Ha ha!"
"Oh yeah," said Piccolo, "Kuririn is short too! We can be a child with Vegeta!"
Vegeta just frowned and said, "Th-that's a stupid plan, think of something else!"
"Don't worry, everyone, I have a plan!" exclaimed Goku.
5 minutes later...
"And so," continued Goku (disguised as Ozzy), "then we just walk right up to Cell and say 'Pip pip cheerio, sorry we're late, mate!' He'll HAVE to let us in, 'cuz he'll think we're Black Sabbath!"
Everyone just frowned at him. Finally and sarcastically, Piccolo said, "Oh, that's a brilliant plan, Goku. *gasp* There's just one little thing."
"What's that?"
"THE BAND'S ALREADY ON STAGE!!!!"
"Oh..... is that a problem?"
"YES!!!"
IS THIS THE END?
IS ALL HOPE REALLY LOST?
WILL THE BOYS EVER GET TO MEET BLACK SABBATH?
AND IF THEY DO, WOULD VEGETA AND OZZY MEETING GO SOMETHING LIKE THIS?
"Ozzy, can I see your cock?"
"Eh? Wha' 'e fuck? Oh, awright! Ah go' nu'in be'er t' d'!"
(fade out..... fade in to Goku standing on a stage)
Goku: Ladies and gentlemen, Black Sabbath!
The entire cast of TDBZS cheers as Black Sabbath performs their kick-ass song "Paranoid"!
THEND
Welp, I'm alive again! I hope you liked that... though you probably didn't... 'Cause it wasn't funny. Well, anyway, be sure to read (and review) The Untold Journeys of Yamcha, currently "playing" on fanfiction.net!... though I don't why I even mentioned this because barely anybody would care about it... sigh... I'm so unloved *sob*... but Y'know, I bet some people do care and speaking of people I was once at this party and... (*thwang* ugh!)
And now, a word from the cast about making "The DragonBall Z Show Meets Black Sabbath":
Vegeta: Well, for me the best part was working with Ozzy. He's a god!... O- of course, all that stuff about me wanting to see his cock was just for the cartoon, I'm not really gay! In fact I LOVE women!....... well, men DRESSED as women, maybe...... (panics) Ah! You didn't hear that! BIG BANG ATTACK! (blows up the camera)
Ozzy: Ah'll fuggin' tell ya, i' wa' a fuggin' ga' bein' on Th' Dra'nBall Z Sh'w. Ah fuggin' loved i' man! Th' bes' fuggin' par' was when tha' Vege'a guy... he fuggin' ga'e me a blow jo'! An' i' wa'n't tha' bad. He wa' fuggin' goo' a' i'!
Master Roshi: Hey, you fucking bastard! Stop fucking stealing my fucking material! FUCK!
Ozzy: Wha' 'e fug're you tal'in' abou'?
Master Roshi: I'm the only fucker around here who fucking says "fuck" after every other fucking word!
Ozzy: Ey, 'ou wa'a fuggin' pei'e o' me!?
Master Roshi: I don't fucking want a fucking piece of you, I fucking want the whole fucking thing!
(Ozzy and Roshi begin a fierce fist fight; the rest of the cast gathers around, cheering them on)
Kuririn: Allright! I got my money on Ozzy!
Yamcha: Are you kidding!? Even though all Roshi does in this series is say "fuck" a lot, he's still Kame-sen'nin, the "God of Martial Arts"! Go, Turtle Hermit!
Ozzy: Fug you!
Master Roshi: No, fuck you!
(and the fight goes on...)
Never let the laughter die and DON'T vote Bush in '04.