Quick Note: I seem to have lost most of my reviewers by 'killing' Harry. I am sorry, I had to. Rest assured, in the fic that is now boiling up I think he'll live. Only two chapters of this one to go!

Chapter 11 – The First Day

Hermione was poking at her food. The Hogwarts house elves had outdone themselves, as usually at the Leaving Feast, but only the word Leaving made Hermione's appetite vanish. Albus Dumbledore had just held his annual leaving speech. The House Cup had been cancelled, because of the events at Voldemort's downfall. The Quidditch Cup went to Slytherin. As Harry hadn't played the last two games, Gryffindor had lost them. Ginny Weasley usually was a decent Seeker, but Harry's death had shaken her too much. Hermione had looked at Severus shortly when she heard the Headmaster pronounce Slytherin the Quidditch Champions, but he didn't look proud. Professor McGonagall didn't show any emotions, either. It just seemed too trivial, Quidditch. She was glad Severus and Professor McGonagall at least seemed to feel that way as well.

Ron, too, was silent. He didn't even scowl at the Slytherins for winning the Quidditch Cup. Like Ginny, he had lost his touch after Harry's death and missed quite a few Quaffles. He didn't even seem to hold resentment. Though the Slytherins had generally been thought to sympathise with the Death Eaters, most of them had fought bravely and the mutual antipathy had lessened somewhat. Only Draco Malfoy and his cronies were looked upon with distrust and shunned by the other students.

Hermione decided to abandon her attempts to eat and just go – anywhere. Anywhere but in the festive atmosphere of the Great Hall, full of people who pretended nothing had happened. She rose and made for the door. Hermione saw Ron follow her and sped up. She didn't want to talk to Ron, now, though she knew he felt the same. Absentmindedly she took a turn, descended a staircase and took another turn. She had left Ron behind – and found herself in front of the entrance to Severus' rooms.

Unintentionally, she had reached the chambers of the man who had helped her before. She hadn't been there since her nightly visit after the Parting Ceremony, being too busy studying and – though she wouldn't admit that readily – afraid he might turn her away. Knowing he wouldn't be back until the Feast was over, she sat down next to the door, making herself as small as possible. There was no danger of anyone besides Severus discovering her there, as the Slytherin Common Room was in another part of the dungeons and no student from one of the other Houses would think about going into the dungeons for any other purpose than Potions lessons.

She hadn't sat there long before she heard the swishing of robes. With a long stride Severus reached the door to his rooms, looking both angry and worried. When he saw her, he started, but his expression softened.

"Miss – Hermione," he said. "Are you all right?" While opening the door, he added: "Come in." She did as he told, looking around as she entered. There was one large room with two doors to the other end, probably leading to a bedroom and a bathroom. In front of a large fireplace like the one in the Gryffindor Common Room, there were a sofa and a dark leather armchair. His desk was littered with books and parchments and most of the walls were covered in bookshelves. She was drawn towards them and let her hand glide over the leather covers. She didn't see him almost smile as she did so.

"Do you want something to drink?" he asked while pouring himself a glass of Ogden's. She turned around and nodded.

"The same as you, please." He handed her the glass and sat down in the armchair, leaving the sofa for her. She sat down on it, a little uncomfortable because she was in his rooms, but already used to his presence.

"Congratulations, Miss Granger. As you are now officially not my student anymore, I can tell you that you have an Outstanding for your Potions NEWT."

"But I thought those marks weren't known until July?" she asked.

"That is true – for students. Teachers usually receive a list sooner, but the examination committee contacted me especially because of your extraordinary score. You scored 106%." She blushed with pleasure. "That is the highest score Hogwarts has seen in a long time." She saw something strange in his eyes, but couldn't place it. She didn't dare ask him what he had scored at his NEWTs.

"Have you already made up your mind regarding your future?" he asked. She was confused: this was already the second time he asked her what her plans were. Was he really interested? Sure enough, he wasn't a man to talk merely for the sake of conversation.

"No, I haven't. I will have to go to my parents' house first, to sort things out and maybe sell the house. I don't think I will return to the Muggle world any time soon."

"But that are merely plans for the summer holidays. How about a career?"

"I don't know. My world has been shaken this year. Now that Voldemort is gone, being an Auror seems futile. And a mediwitch... I don't think I have the social skills one needs for that. Every other career I didn't even consider." She answered thoughtfully.

"How about Potions?" She looked up in shock.

"Potions? Why?" she asked.

"You know my views of teaching, don't you?" When she nodded, he continued. "I won't be teaching here forever, and if I left Hogwarts would need a new Potions Teacher. I talked to Albus, and we agreed you would qualify as a teacher as soon as you took your degree." Hesitantly he added, "If you like it, of course."

After a long pause, she answered. "I never considered it, but I guess Hogwarts is the closest thing to a home I have. Would you be teaching me?"

"No. You would have to take an apprenticeship with someone else. That could be intern, but it also could be you'd have to Apparate in every day. I will of course give you a recommendation." She considered it for a while.

"Well, I like Potions. I think I would like teaching as well. And if I don't I could go into research." She paused again. "I do it."

"Very well, Miss Granger," he answered. "Of course you are not to spread around the news, you understand that?" She nodded and they were silent again.

Suddenly she realised what had brought her here tonight. She had missed his presence, the way he could be just there, without speaking. Of course, there were always people in the Common Room, but usually they kept asking her questions or talked so loud you had to perform a Deafening Hex on yourself to be able to think. She relaxed a little on the sofa, curling into the backrest. She folded her hands about the glass as if to warm them.  They sat like that for a long time; both immerged in thought. Slowly, Hermione dozed away, the fire and the alcohol on an empty stomach making her sleepy.

Severus was still thinking, about her. He really didn't know what to think. During their time at Aberforth's he had grown used to her presence, first only at mealtimes and later also in the evenings. He knew she was smart and had known that for a long time, but never appreciated it until their exile. He was sure she could complete the study in Potions, and he thought it would be better for both if she didn't do that at Hogwarts. For her, because she needed to see something of the world, meet new people and create a life of her own, and for him, because he wouldn't be able to teach her on a daily basis. Not after what she had done at Aberforth's. Suddenly, he got angry with himself for thinking about her that way and threw his glass into the hearth, where the fire burned low.

Hermione woke up with a shock, confused and wondering where she was. Then she remembered her flight from the Feast and her talk with Severus. And she found herself on his sofa, just awoken. He looked at her in an almost apologetic way.

"I'm sorry if I woke you, Hermione." So we're back at first-name basis, she thought. She wondered what he meant by that, after being so formal the entire evening.

"It's fine, Severus," she said, deliberately using his first name as well. "I think I should leave now, before anybody notices my absence. How about the apprenticeship?" Though the question was unclear, he thought he knew what she meant.

"You will receive an owl regarding the particulars." She nodded and hesitated.

"Severus?" she tried. He looked her straight into her eyes, but he wasn't using his glare. "I just wanted to thank you for all you have done for me. I know it can't have been easy for you."

"You are welcome, Hermione," he said. Very welcome, he added mentally. He rose and walked towards the door, but didn't open it yet. She followed him. They both hesitated. Moments passed, without either moving. This time, he was the one who summoned the courage. He bowed down towards her and kissed her deeply. To his great surprise, she didn't pull away but kissed back.

"You know," he said when finally he pulled away. "You are tearing my world apart."