Tainted Innocence
Chapter 7Riddick discovered books today. My collection of real hardbound books had been on the shelf since he arrived but somehow they caught his eye today and he wandered over in curiosity to have a look for himself. He ran his fingers over the dusty spines, I know, I haven't read them in a long time, and he tilted his head so he could read the titles, pausing over a few different ones. I was watching him from the hall, smiling. Ned hated reading and went out of his way to state that every time I picked one up. He said it filled my head with crazy ideas that altered my true perspective on life. I hated that asshole. No, I hate that asshole.
I was wondering if Riddick could read at the same time he chose one and pulled it from its spot. He looked at the cover as he walked to the couch and sat down, flipping it open. I'm assuming he could read because it certainly wasn't a picture book so there was nothing he could stare at but words. The goggles over his eyes kept me in the dark until he turned the page. Yep, he was reading. I backed into the kitchen and started to clean it, leaving Riddick to his book. Not sure what one he chose.
What seemed like hours later the kitchen was finally clean. I walked back into the hall noticing the sun was going down and, yeah, guess it was hours later and I was about to head to the bathroom but I had to see. I quietly looked into the living room and Riddick was still reading, about half way through now. He didn't look up and he made no indication that he knew I was there. On occasion I got lost in a book like that, everything around you just fades away.
I dragged my ass to the bathroom to start on that, complaining to myself the whole way. Cleaning is not my thing but with all the hours I've been putting in at work, my apartment got to the point where it desperately needed it. So why not take advantage of the down time. I still didn't want to do it. The bathroom didn't take as long as the kitchen and now that it was clean I was finally able to smile and pat myself on the back. I put all the cleaning stuff away and walked back to the living room to see if Riddick wanted to help me get dinner ready, but I stopped short when I got there.
Riddick had stretched out on the couch asleep, book open and lying on his chest, one hand holding it, the other hanging over the side. He was wearing that peaceful look again and I couldn't figure out if he was always like this or just now while he couldn't remember where he's been and what he's done.
Dinner was forgotten as I walked over to him. I slipped the book out from under his hand and put it on the glass coffee table, then gently took a hold of his goggles and slipped them over his head. I was prepared for him to lash out at me but he barely moved.
His position was so inviting to me that I couldn't turn it down. I settled down on the couch next to him, resting my head on his shoulder and draping my arm across his stomach. He grumbled quietly and wrapped his arm around me, drawing me closer to him. I was relieved he didn't wake up, didn't freak out like he did the other day.
All these new feelings I have been experiencing this past week kept me emotionally and mentally exhausted, not to mention physically wiped out. I fell asleep with little effort, which is surprising. I could never fall asleep with someone touching me before, but now it didn't seem to affect me in the least. Sometimes, the few occasions I would actually be in a deep sleep, Ned would climb into bed behind me after one of his late night outings with his buddies and no doubt a few hookers. As slow and as quiet as he moved, the slightest jarring of the bed would bring me right out of sleep.
Then I would have to smell the cheap liquor and the cheap perfume of his one hour companions and I wouldn't be able to fall back to sleep. I don't think he ever knew that he woke me up every time he came home. There were a few times when I knew he hadn't done anything that night but have sex and he would still want more when he got home. Fucking me wasn't doing me any favors, it wasn't to ease any guilt he might have been feeling, he just wanted to reassure himself that he still owned me, that I was only fucking him. This power trip he had usually became rough and almost violent. He never hit me but the sex was hard and I bled afterwards, every time. Lucky for me, that didn't happen too often. His hookers and his drinking and his club hopping became his focus and I faded into the background.
Right now, my background was Riddick. And that's all I wanted. He had become so completely woven into my life that I figured it would be next to impossible to let him go without unraveling him from me, which would be like taking me apart. Leaving me nothing but loose ends…back to the old shit grind, back to a life I have been longing to be rid of as far back as I can remember. I didn't want to lose this man but there hasn't been a time in my life that I haven't lost something important to me.
Funny thing about dreams. It's supposed to be a combination of things you've gone through, things you want to go through and sometimes it gives you a peek of what things you will get to go through. At certain points in a dream cycle, you hear and feel things as if they're real. As your brain relaxes, it allows you to feel sensations in a way that you've never felt before. There's no outside interference to distract you from what's happening. And your body is able to respond in the way it's supposed to…the way it's designed to.
That's how I woke up. I was lost somewhere in my subconscious, when I felt a tugging, twisting, absolutely explosive sensation at some point on my body I couldn't quite pinpoint. My nerves fired up and drank in everything it was feeling. There was heat, something sharp, then it went warm and wet, before becoming shockingly cold. I felt my body arch, writhe, seek out this pleasure that was feasting on me, but I didn't wake up yet. Something inside me needed to feel this, uninhibited, uninterrupted, mind-blowing altered reality, full of commotion and colliding emotions.
The wet heat returned and slowly began to spread throughout my body, tripping sensitive nerve endings all over. I couldn't hold onto sleep any longer and I pulled myself almost painfully into my conscious mind, leaving the warmth of my dreams. But it wasn't cold where I was when I woke up. I could feel the heat from Riddick's body warming me and I realized I was now on my back and he had shifted position and was no longer at my eye level.
The room was lighter than before and I realized it must be early morning sunlight that was filtering through the curtains. Something tugged at me again and I lifted my head to look down along my body. And what I saw nearly sent me into a heated frenzy. Riddick had my shirt unbuttoned and was suckling at one of my nipples, drawing the taut flesh between his teeth and biting gently. It was enough to bring on an orgasm if I wasn't so shocked. I groaned against my will and his eyes were drawn to mine. He released the erect tissue and held my gaze for a long moment, his eyes shimmering in the dim light.
I was trying to breathe but it was so erratic I couldn't focus. His eyes were drilling into me; breaking down the sexual barriers Ned had forced me to place. I arched my back, brushing my nipple across his chin and he looked down at it. His warm breath washed over my sensitive skin, bringing on goose bumps and hardening my already hardened peak to where it actually hurt.
With a deep moan, Riddick covered me with his mouth, easing the pain with his soft tongue, massaging all the tension out of my body with simple, easy, soothing strokes. I ran my hands over his smooth head, pressing my body to his, wanting to ask for more but wasn't able to form any coherent words.
I was driven mad by the thought of him touching me but when he actually did like he was now, I lost all sanity and became boneless in his arms. So many thoughts and visuals flew through my mind as he pressed his hard body onto mine, gripping my hips tightly as his tongue continued to lavish its attention on my nipple. I could feel his chest pressing against my leg as he breathed, hard and fast, and it wasn't long before he released the perfect suction he had on me and took a deep breath.
He pressed his forehead between my breasts, breathing hotly down my exposed belly. I remained as still as I could but it was difficult, he had me so worked up that I couldn't control my body, couldn't stop it from writhing against his. I wanted to tear his clothes off and run my hands over his smooth, warm skin; taste him with my lips and tongue, making him feel so much pleasure he couldn't stop from groaning. I wanted to hear him, hear that deep gravelly voice, groaning in ecstasy; but right now was about him; he was doing the exploring and I was just gonna have to deal with that.
In a quick smooth motion, Riddick slid up my body, dragging one hand over my breast up to cup my face, pressing his mouth to my ear. He strategically placed his knee between my legs to steady himself, unknowingly putting pressure right where I needed it, forcing me to whimper in pleasure and at the same time setting me up for the inevitable release I've needed for so long.
I began grinding my crotch into his knee just as he clamped down on my neck, jolting my whole body. I had a sudden flash of déjà vu. I could swear on my life Riddick had done this to me before but when the hell would that have happened?
His lips were melting to my skin as I continued to rock against him. My raspy breathing was cut short when I felt something hard pressing into my hip…something big. I shifted around a little to get a better idea of size when Riddick grunted, the vibration of its deepness moving through my neck. My shifting seemed to do something for him so I did it again. His erection rubbed against the material of our clothes and his grunt became a long, drawn out growl. He quickly caught on to my rhythm and slid the hardness of him against me, moving his hands up my back, underneath my shirt on my bare skin until they reached the back of my neck.
I turned my head to the side and kissed his fingers as they curled over my shoulder, digging in painfully as he pulled on me. Riddick released the sensitive flesh of my neck and pressed his lips to my collarbone, breathing so hard, moving so hard that I thought I would finally make it to the top of that mountain when his breathing stopped and he jerked against me like he had been hit. Just as fast, his breathing resumed, even harder than before, bringing with it a deep shaky groan and he jerked again. I was a little worried that he was hurting and moved to the side and looked down at him to see his face. His eyes were shut tight, his brow furrowed, he had sucked his bottom lip into his mouth, grimacing as he bit down. I was frightened and was beginning to freefall off my mountain as I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him even closer to me at the same time he jerked again.
Oh, God. What has happening?
Riddick finally stilled and pulled away from me to look in my eyes. They were glazed over, his eyelids heavy and he was still breathing hard. It was another second before I felt it…felt something hot and sticky against my hip, slowly spreading. I put my hand on his chest and pushed him away from me so I could see what it was. His whole body was shaking and as he moved his hips away from me he shuddered. It hit me hard then…exactly what it was that had happened. Riddick had his release; he had made it up and over his mountain. He orgasm was so obvious now that I wanted to slap myself for not understanding what was going on before so I could just enjoy it with him.
He looked a little worried about what happened as he pushed himself up to his knees and I sat up with him, wrapping my arms around his waist. There was nothing wrong and I didn't want him to feel like it was a bad thing because it wasn't. I could feel his heart pounding against his ribs as I pressed my cheek to his chest, running my hands over his lower back. It took him a second to wrap his arms around me and when he did, it was a fierce and tight hug.
He moved his arms underneath mine and pulled me onto his lap, burying his face in my neck as he sighed deep in the back of his throat. My arms went around his shoulders almost sighing myself. I was relieved that he was okay and it didn't even matter what my body was denied, I was glad he was able to get something out of this. He held me like that for a long time, stroking my back and kissing my neck and it wasn't until the sun had come all the way up before I pulled myself off his lap. I took his hands and pulled him to his feet and I was very aware of him as he stood in front of me, so big and tall and safe. He was my safe place, someone I would always feel protected with. I only wished I had met him a long time ago, just his presence could have pulled me out of the worst situations I have ever found myself in. He was strong and he made me feel strong too.
We walked down to the bathroom silently, his large hand holding onto my smaller one, nothing like the first time we did this. That time he was scared, unsure about who Darren was leaving him with and what was going to happen to him. But now, he held my hand because he wanted to, because of that connection. We both needed to feel physical contact with each other and I don't know how I knew that. For being almost total strangers, we had gotten pretty close pretty fast. I learned things about him that I never was able to find out in other men and he was certainly able to draw out things in me that I never imagined I could feel.
Once in the bathroom I turned around to face him and looked up into his beautifully shined eyes, my hands moving up to his shoulders then to his face. His eyes closed and I moved in to kiss him lightly on the cheek. The same instant I did that his arms went around my waist and pulled me against him, holding onto me like he would never get another chance. I enjoyed the feel of his chest pressed against me, the hardness of his body against the softness of mine. We could've stayed like that forever but I reached behind me and took hold of his arms and moved them away from me. I couldn't look at him as I left the bathroom but I could feel his eyes on me, burning me wherever he looked until the door was shut.
I wearily headed to my room and began stripping out of my clothes as a thought suddenly came to me. Darren was supposed to have come by yesterday to check on things and give me an update on Riddick's situation but he never showed. I was a little worried but then I couldn't help but feel a little happy that Riddick might be around longer than expected. Maybe it was selfish of me to want to keep him here and it made me feel guilty for even hoping for it. I really needed to get my life together, prepare myself for the day when Riddick walked out that door.
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