Spork's Film of The Century!
CHAPTER 3
[BEWARE! Dun dun duuunnnn]
Brought to you by: Sir Spork Productions©
Author: Sango
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, or anyone...Except Sir Spork, she is my original character! XP
Rating: I guess PG, there's nothing inappropriate in here, yet....Language and Drug references will probably be in later chapters, So WARNING on that...
"Director": Sir Spork the Sporkiness©
Cast: InuYasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Sesshoumaru and Kouga (And probably some guest stars in later chapters)
Note: Those of you who don't know what a SPORK is...Shame upon you....It's the offspring of a one-night stand between a Fork and Spoon....Kinda twisted, huh?
CHAPTER 3: Panties!
~*~*~*~*~*~
A quick recap: Spork has gotten a new worker. This worker does whatever Spork wants, such as bring her lemonade. Spork has now completed scene 1, though it took several hours and many martinis....
Spork: YEEEEAY! We're finally done the first scene!
Spork dances about gleefully, Meow joins in and dances too. Miroku grabs hold of Sango's hands and swings her in circles.
Sango: ACK!
Miroku: Wheeeeeeee!
Sesshoumaru grabs hold of the nearest person--Kouga--'s hands and swings him around. InuYasha hesitates and asks Kagome to dance. Kagome says yes and the whole cast dance around until Spork grabs a megaphone.
Spork: *Yells in Megaphone* QUIIIIIIIET!
Everyone: OWWWW!
InuYasha: My ears... x_x
Spork places the megaphone on the ground and quickly apologizes for yelling too loud.
Spork: Aaaaanyway, we need scene 2 to get started.
Everyone's faces have a cross between "Oh no" and "Yay."
Spork: Well, Scene 2 is gonna take place at a beach...
Miroku: A SEX SCENE!?
Spork: Yea, how'd you know?
Sango: O_O You're serious!?
Miroku is now hopping around with pure happiness until Spork starts laughing.
Spork: *Trying not to laugh* I was only *Giggle* Joking!
Miroku: ...That isn't funny... You got me all excited... An' I thought you was serious...
Miroku is staring at the ground and mumbling. Sango is relieved Spork was joking but she feels bad that Miroku's depressed now.
Spork: Anyways...I was serious about the beach scene. Everyone but InuYasha (Steven), will be partying at the beach. Anyone who doesn't exactly have a part will be background characters. Got that? Then, Steven shows up and meets Kagome (Helen), and he falls madly in love with her. But the thing is... Helen hangs out with the cool people--Miroku, Sango, Kouga-- Helen does want to be with him, but she doesn't want to lose all her friends. I kinda got this twisted West Side Story thing goin' here, huh?
InuYasha appears lost as he goes over what he's supposed to do.
Miroku: So... *Looks up from his pouting* I get to party with Sango?
Sango: Oh no...
Spork: Yep! Now go get changed....and InuYasha, your trailer is the one with your name on it *Snickers*
InuYasha's face becomes more confused and a hot blush covers his cheeks. He mumbles something.
Spork: Say what? I can't hear you, speak up.
InuYasha: I... can't read....
Spork: o_o;
InuYasha: Yeah... So if I can get some special help for rehearsing my lines... Uh...
Spork: Absolutely! Meow, help InuYasha with his lines, would you?
Meow: *Stops playing with Sesshoumaru's make-up* Okay!
The dog and the cat walk to InuYasha's trailer. InuYasha seems embarrassed that a six-year-old knows more about reading than him... The rest of the cast have gone to change.
Spork: Ahh, peace and quiet...
An ear piercing squeal is heard from the changing rooms and Sesshoumaru comes running out with a pink tutu on.
Sesshoumaru: I will not dress in these so-called "gangsta" clothes. I refuse to be so disrespectful to myself!
Sesshoumaru crosses his arms over his bare chest and turns his nose away.
Spork: Ai-ya, fine. Wear, uh, a shirt and jeans...?
Sesshoumaru: *Slowly looks at her* Well, I suppose that will be acceptable. But I still wanna be a fairy princess! When you need me I'll be in my trailer!
Sesshoumaru flips his hair and walks dignantly back to his trailer. InuYasha comes out with a slight change of clothes from before-he's now wearing really baggy white jeans and a black tank top, with some old chains and a pair of sunglasses.
InuYasha: I know my lines now. Thanks to Meow.
Meow: Hehehe, don't thank me, it's my job.
Spork: Love the outfit InuYasha.
InuYasha: I think I'm getting used to this look.
Spork: It works for you... *Checks him out*
Kagome walks over--wearing a black pleated skirt and a white blouse with way to much make-up on--and sees Spork checking out InuYasha.
Kagome: Wh--?!
Spork: Eh? It wasn't me.
Kagome is outraged and she walks over, sits with her back against a prop and pouts.
InuYasha: What I do?
Spork: YOU didn't do anything, neither did I..*Whispers to InuYasha* PMS..
Kagome: I HEARD THAT!
InuYasha: What's PMS?
Spork: O.o; Uhh... Letters? Yeah, letters...
Spork shakes her head sadly.
InuYasha: Well what does letters have to do with Kagome?
Spork: InuYasha...
InuYasha: Hm?
Spork: Were you a sheltered child?
InuYasha: I had a shelter, I lived in a nice place with my mommy, my daddy and Sesshoumaru.
Spork: That answers my question ._.;
Sango comes out wearing a black skintight miniskirt and a light pink blouse, she has pink eye shadow and bright lipstick. She seems unenthusiastic about her outfit again.
Sango: Why am I always dressed like a whore?!
Miroku walks in right now wearing baggy dark blue jeans and no shirt with sunglasses and "bling-bling."
Miroku: I don't think you look like a whore, Sango... I think you look nice.
Sango: *Seems truly touched by his comment* Really?
Miroku: Hell yeah! *Slaps her ass*
Sango growls and mumbles some colorful use of words and smacks Miroku.
Spork: Don't hurt him!
Sango: It's hard not to!
Miroku twitches on the floor and crawls over like a caterpillar. He squirms over to Sango and looks up her skirt.
Miroku: Oooo, Sango's not wearing panties!
Sango's face turns the brightest possible shade of red and she kicks Miroku across the room.
Sango: YOU JACKASS!
Meow skips around the room, clapping and chanting her new favorite word.
Meow: Panties! Panties! What ARE panties?
Spork: Ehhhhhh.... Well, they're uh... You see, kid.... Uhm.... Er....
Miroku: *Walks back over* What they are is-
::WHACK!::
Spork and Sango both smacked Miroku.
Miroku: OwWwWw.. X.x
Meow: They're what?
Spork: Nothing. Let's start filming!
Meow: Okay. But we're missing Wolfy and Fluffy...
Spork: Oh yeah, go fetch Sesshoumaru.
Meow: 'Kay!
Meow hops off to get Sesshoumaru and as she leaves Kouga comes in. He's wearing black pants that are way too big and a dark green vest with sunglasses on his head.
Spork: Nice timing!
Kouga: I don't think green is my color... *Frown*
Spork: It'll do!
Meow comes out with Sesshoumaru, he's wearing a semi-baggy pair of blue jeans and a loose black shirt. He has sunglasses and a spiky belt worn loosely around his waist.
Spork: Meee-OW!
Meow: Yeah?
Spork: Er, not you...
Sesshoumaru twirls in a circle and shows off, but is quickly shoved onto the stage.
Meow: PLACES!
The cast take their places, even the cranky Kagome cheers up to play her part.
Spork: Lights. Cameras. Action!
There are a few other stand-ins who are just background for the movie, they're partying on a beach set, music playing loudly. Miroku (Brad) and Sango (Stacey) are walking along the beach, Miroku's arm around her waist. Miroku goes to talk to one of the stand-ins. Sango walks over to chat with Kagome (Helen). InuYasha (Steven) is walking along the shore by himself, staring at the ground. He hears the music and looks up.
InuYasha: What the... Oh no...
He sees Stacey and knows that Brad has to be near by so he goes to turn but stops.
InuYasha: Who. Is. That?
His eyes have spotted Helen, and he feels his heart beat increase. His palms grow sweaty and he swallows the knot in his throat. He continues staring, even though he knows Brad is sure to start trouble is he sees him.
Kagome: *Talking to Sango* Yeah I know! He is SO hot! I-...
She stops when she sees Steven. Helen nudges Stacey and gestures with a nod toward Steven.
Kagome: Who is that?! He's so hot!
Sango: HIM?! He's some trouble maker, Helen, stay away from him! He started shit the other day at the bar with Brad. He's nothing but trouble.. Helen, you're not thinking about anything are you?
Kagome: Wow... I'm far passed thinking about anything. Stacey, I'm going over there...
Sango: NO!
Helen pushes Stacey gently out of the way and starts walking toward Steven. Steven has now turned and is walking away, unaware that Helen is walking to him.
Kagome: Hey, you!
Steven stops and looks behind him. He quickly turns back around and walks faster because he sees Stacey and Brad right behind Helen.
Kagome: Wait! Where're you going?
Steven stops and turns back to her.
InuYasha: I-...I can't stay... Uh... I gotta go home...
Kagome: Wait, I... Uh... Can't you stay?
Steven looks at the ground, turns away and walks off. Stacey and Brad come up behind her to tell her to stay away from him. But Helen runs off, following Steven home.
Spork: CUT!! EXCELLENT! Perfect emotion, you all did good on your lines, great, great. Very nice! I'm so proud of you all!
A few "Thanks. No problem"'s are heard from the cast and InuYasha walks back over.
Spork: We have to celebrate! Hm...
Meow: PANTIES!
Miroku: That's a perfect way to celebrate! This kid has a good head on her shoulders!
Spork: Err... I was thinking more on the lines of... Oh, I dunno... Martinis?
Sesshoumaru: Not again...
Meow: PANTIIIIES! *Hops and skips in circles*
Spork: Dear God, make her stop... Meow...
Meow: PAN- ... Yes?
Spork: Stop.
Meow: Whyyyyyyy?
Miroku: Yeah, Whyyyyyyy?
Spork & Sango: Because!
Meow and Miroku: Aww...
Kouga has been fidgeting and playing with the zipper on his vest and has got his ponytail caught.
Kouga: Oww, uh, little help here?
Everyone laughs and Spork helps Kouga.
Kouga: Evil zipper... -_-
Spork: Why don'tchu just cut of your ponytail?
Kouga: O_O
Spork: o.O Just.. Kidding?
Kagome: Why should you be 'just kidding'?! You have a right to state your opinion! It's in the Constitution! Stupid men think they rule this planet! HUMPH!
Kagome storms off to her trailer.
Spork: What a bitch...
Meow: Bitch, bitch, bitch! *Hops in circles*
Spork: Oh no, not again! @_@
Miroku: Sango, I hope we have children just like her!
Sango: What do you mean by 'we'?!?!
Miroku: I can't make children myself...
Sango: That would be amusing...
Everyone agrees that Miroku giving birth would be very interesting. The cast laugh, all except Miroku--who is shaking in fear of the pain of birth giving.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Author Note: I hope you liked it! Send in reviews, suggestions and questions! I'll have the cast answer any fan mail! And if you want your character to be a guest star, you can either: 1. Send in a picture (Be sure to include name, attitude, age, gender and other info) or 2. Fill this out and email it to me-
Name/
Gender/ (M or F)
Looks/ (Eyes, hair, skin color, race, clothing, anything else you think important)
Attitude/
Age/ (If you don't have a specific age then an age group [child, teen, adult, elder, etc.])
Anything else you might want to add-
(THE MORE DETAIL THE BETTER! If you don't have a good description I will reply to you and request that you fix it!)
EXAMPLE!!!!!!!!!
Name-Sir Spork/
Gender- F/
Looks-Purple eyes. Orange hair that appears never brushed. Light brown (tan) skin color. Squirrel Demon. She WEARS: A black shirt with the word SPORK on it, a spork necklace, blue jeans, a black spiked belt with a Spork belt buckle, and little brown boots./
Attitude- Hyper, bouncy, crazy, carefree, but she can become easily annoyed, has a short temper around guys especially./
Age- Around 18 [Teen]/
Extra- She loves sporks, and she likes eating, and climbing trees (she IS a squirrel after all)/
NOTE: I will not put anything in the fic if your character is "dating" one of the cast members, it obstructs the storyline. Plus, you can send in as many as TWO characters, I MAY make exceptions. And if you so choose to send in more than one character you MUST fill out the form for both characters. My email is vampsango@aol.com Place "FANFIC" in the subject line. Thank you! *HUG*
CHAPTER 3
[BEWARE! Dun dun duuunnnn]
Brought to you by: Sir Spork Productions©
Author: Sango
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, or anyone...Except Sir Spork, she is my original character! XP
Rating: I guess PG, there's nothing inappropriate in here, yet....Language and Drug references will probably be in later chapters, So WARNING on that...
"Director": Sir Spork the Sporkiness©
Cast: InuYasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Sesshoumaru and Kouga (And probably some guest stars in later chapters)
Note: Those of you who don't know what a SPORK is...Shame upon you....It's the offspring of a one-night stand between a Fork and Spoon....Kinda twisted, huh?
CHAPTER 3: Panties!
~*~*~*~*~*~
A quick recap: Spork has gotten a new worker. This worker does whatever Spork wants, such as bring her lemonade. Spork has now completed scene 1, though it took several hours and many martinis....
Spork: YEEEEAY! We're finally done the first scene!
Spork dances about gleefully, Meow joins in and dances too. Miroku grabs hold of Sango's hands and swings her in circles.
Sango: ACK!
Miroku: Wheeeeeeee!
Sesshoumaru grabs hold of the nearest person--Kouga--'s hands and swings him around. InuYasha hesitates and asks Kagome to dance. Kagome says yes and the whole cast dance around until Spork grabs a megaphone.
Spork: *Yells in Megaphone* QUIIIIIIIET!
Everyone: OWWWW!
InuYasha: My ears... x_x
Spork places the megaphone on the ground and quickly apologizes for yelling too loud.
Spork: Aaaaanyway, we need scene 2 to get started.
Everyone's faces have a cross between "Oh no" and "Yay."
Spork: Well, Scene 2 is gonna take place at a beach...
Miroku: A SEX SCENE!?
Spork: Yea, how'd you know?
Sango: O_O You're serious!?
Miroku is now hopping around with pure happiness until Spork starts laughing.
Spork: *Trying not to laugh* I was only *Giggle* Joking!
Miroku: ...That isn't funny... You got me all excited... An' I thought you was serious...
Miroku is staring at the ground and mumbling. Sango is relieved Spork was joking but she feels bad that Miroku's depressed now.
Spork: Anyways...I was serious about the beach scene. Everyone but InuYasha (Steven), will be partying at the beach. Anyone who doesn't exactly have a part will be background characters. Got that? Then, Steven shows up and meets Kagome (Helen), and he falls madly in love with her. But the thing is... Helen hangs out with the cool people--Miroku, Sango, Kouga-- Helen does want to be with him, but she doesn't want to lose all her friends. I kinda got this twisted West Side Story thing goin' here, huh?
InuYasha appears lost as he goes over what he's supposed to do.
Miroku: So... *Looks up from his pouting* I get to party with Sango?
Sango: Oh no...
Spork: Yep! Now go get changed....and InuYasha, your trailer is the one with your name on it *Snickers*
InuYasha's face becomes more confused and a hot blush covers his cheeks. He mumbles something.
Spork: Say what? I can't hear you, speak up.
InuYasha: I... can't read....
Spork: o_o;
InuYasha: Yeah... So if I can get some special help for rehearsing my lines... Uh...
Spork: Absolutely! Meow, help InuYasha with his lines, would you?
Meow: *Stops playing with Sesshoumaru's make-up* Okay!
The dog and the cat walk to InuYasha's trailer. InuYasha seems embarrassed that a six-year-old knows more about reading than him... The rest of the cast have gone to change.
Spork: Ahh, peace and quiet...
An ear piercing squeal is heard from the changing rooms and Sesshoumaru comes running out with a pink tutu on.
Sesshoumaru: I will not dress in these so-called "gangsta" clothes. I refuse to be so disrespectful to myself!
Sesshoumaru crosses his arms over his bare chest and turns his nose away.
Spork: Ai-ya, fine. Wear, uh, a shirt and jeans...?
Sesshoumaru: *Slowly looks at her* Well, I suppose that will be acceptable. But I still wanna be a fairy princess! When you need me I'll be in my trailer!
Sesshoumaru flips his hair and walks dignantly back to his trailer. InuYasha comes out with a slight change of clothes from before-he's now wearing really baggy white jeans and a black tank top, with some old chains and a pair of sunglasses.
InuYasha: I know my lines now. Thanks to Meow.
Meow: Hehehe, don't thank me, it's my job.
Spork: Love the outfit InuYasha.
InuYasha: I think I'm getting used to this look.
Spork: It works for you... *Checks him out*
Kagome walks over--wearing a black pleated skirt and a white blouse with way to much make-up on--and sees Spork checking out InuYasha.
Kagome: Wh--?!
Spork: Eh? It wasn't me.
Kagome is outraged and she walks over, sits with her back against a prop and pouts.
InuYasha: What I do?
Spork: YOU didn't do anything, neither did I..*Whispers to InuYasha* PMS..
Kagome: I HEARD THAT!
InuYasha: What's PMS?
Spork: O.o; Uhh... Letters? Yeah, letters...
Spork shakes her head sadly.
InuYasha: Well what does letters have to do with Kagome?
Spork: InuYasha...
InuYasha: Hm?
Spork: Were you a sheltered child?
InuYasha: I had a shelter, I lived in a nice place with my mommy, my daddy and Sesshoumaru.
Spork: That answers my question ._.;
Sango comes out wearing a black skintight miniskirt and a light pink blouse, she has pink eye shadow and bright lipstick. She seems unenthusiastic about her outfit again.
Sango: Why am I always dressed like a whore?!
Miroku walks in right now wearing baggy dark blue jeans and no shirt with sunglasses and "bling-bling."
Miroku: I don't think you look like a whore, Sango... I think you look nice.
Sango: *Seems truly touched by his comment* Really?
Miroku: Hell yeah! *Slaps her ass*
Sango growls and mumbles some colorful use of words and smacks Miroku.
Spork: Don't hurt him!
Sango: It's hard not to!
Miroku twitches on the floor and crawls over like a caterpillar. He squirms over to Sango and looks up her skirt.
Miroku: Oooo, Sango's not wearing panties!
Sango's face turns the brightest possible shade of red and she kicks Miroku across the room.
Sango: YOU JACKASS!
Meow skips around the room, clapping and chanting her new favorite word.
Meow: Panties! Panties! What ARE panties?
Spork: Ehhhhhh.... Well, they're uh... You see, kid.... Uhm.... Er....
Miroku: *Walks back over* What they are is-
::WHACK!::
Spork and Sango both smacked Miroku.
Miroku: OwWwWw.. X.x
Meow: They're what?
Spork: Nothing. Let's start filming!
Meow: Okay. But we're missing Wolfy and Fluffy...
Spork: Oh yeah, go fetch Sesshoumaru.
Meow: 'Kay!
Meow hops off to get Sesshoumaru and as she leaves Kouga comes in. He's wearing black pants that are way too big and a dark green vest with sunglasses on his head.
Spork: Nice timing!
Kouga: I don't think green is my color... *Frown*
Spork: It'll do!
Meow comes out with Sesshoumaru, he's wearing a semi-baggy pair of blue jeans and a loose black shirt. He has sunglasses and a spiky belt worn loosely around his waist.
Spork: Meee-OW!
Meow: Yeah?
Spork: Er, not you...
Sesshoumaru twirls in a circle and shows off, but is quickly shoved onto the stage.
Meow: PLACES!
The cast take their places, even the cranky Kagome cheers up to play her part.
Spork: Lights. Cameras. Action!
There are a few other stand-ins who are just background for the movie, they're partying on a beach set, music playing loudly. Miroku (Brad) and Sango (Stacey) are walking along the beach, Miroku's arm around her waist. Miroku goes to talk to one of the stand-ins. Sango walks over to chat with Kagome (Helen). InuYasha (Steven) is walking along the shore by himself, staring at the ground. He hears the music and looks up.
InuYasha: What the... Oh no...
He sees Stacey and knows that Brad has to be near by so he goes to turn but stops.
InuYasha: Who. Is. That?
His eyes have spotted Helen, and he feels his heart beat increase. His palms grow sweaty and he swallows the knot in his throat. He continues staring, even though he knows Brad is sure to start trouble is he sees him.
Kagome: *Talking to Sango* Yeah I know! He is SO hot! I-...
She stops when she sees Steven. Helen nudges Stacey and gestures with a nod toward Steven.
Kagome: Who is that?! He's so hot!
Sango: HIM?! He's some trouble maker, Helen, stay away from him! He started shit the other day at the bar with Brad. He's nothing but trouble.. Helen, you're not thinking about anything are you?
Kagome: Wow... I'm far passed thinking about anything. Stacey, I'm going over there...
Sango: NO!
Helen pushes Stacey gently out of the way and starts walking toward Steven. Steven has now turned and is walking away, unaware that Helen is walking to him.
Kagome: Hey, you!
Steven stops and looks behind him. He quickly turns back around and walks faster because he sees Stacey and Brad right behind Helen.
Kagome: Wait! Where're you going?
Steven stops and turns back to her.
InuYasha: I-...I can't stay... Uh... I gotta go home...
Kagome: Wait, I... Uh... Can't you stay?
Steven looks at the ground, turns away and walks off. Stacey and Brad come up behind her to tell her to stay away from him. But Helen runs off, following Steven home.
Spork: CUT!! EXCELLENT! Perfect emotion, you all did good on your lines, great, great. Very nice! I'm so proud of you all!
A few "Thanks. No problem"'s are heard from the cast and InuYasha walks back over.
Spork: We have to celebrate! Hm...
Meow: PANTIES!
Miroku: That's a perfect way to celebrate! This kid has a good head on her shoulders!
Spork: Err... I was thinking more on the lines of... Oh, I dunno... Martinis?
Sesshoumaru: Not again...
Meow: PANTIIIIES! *Hops and skips in circles*
Spork: Dear God, make her stop... Meow...
Meow: PAN- ... Yes?
Spork: Stop.
Meow: Whyyyyyyy?
Miroku: Yeah, Whyyyyyyy?
Spork & Sango: Because!
Meow and Miroku: Aww...
Kouga has been fidgeting and playing with the zipper on his vest and has got his ponytail caught.
Kouga: Oww, uh, little help here?
Everyone laughs and Spork helps Kouga.
Kouga: Evil zipper... -_-
Spork: Why don'tchu just cut of your ponytail?
Kouga: O_O
Spork: o.O Just.. Kidding?
Kagome: Why should you be 'just kidding'?! You have a right to state your opinion! It's in the Constitution! Stupid men think they rule this planet! HUMPH!
Kagome storms off to her trailer.
Spork: What a bitch...
Meow: Bitch, bitch, bitch! *Hops in circles*
Spork: Oh no, not again! @_@
Miroku: Sango, I hope we have children just like her!
Sango: What do you mean by 'we'?!?!
Miroku: I can't make children myself...
Sango: That would be amusing...
Everyone agrees that Miroku giving birth would be very interesting. The cast laugh, all except Miroku--who is shaking in fear of the pain of birth giving.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Author Note: I hope you liked it! Send in reviews, suggestions and questions! I'll have the cast answer any fan mail! And if you want your character to be a guest star, you can either: 1. Send in a picture (Be sure to include name, attitude, age, gender and other info) or 2. Fill this out and email it to me-
Name/
Gender/ (M or F)
Looks/ (Eyes, hair, skin color, race, clothing, anything else you think important)
Attitude/
Age/ (If you don't have a specific age then an age group [child, teen, adult, elder, etc.])
Anything else you might want to add-
(THE MORE DETAIL THE BETTER! If you don't have a good description I will reply to you and request that you fix it!)
EXAMPLE!!!!!!!!!
Name-Sir Spork/
Gender- F/
Looks-Purple eyes. Orange hair that appears never brushed. Light brown (tan) skin color. Squirrel Demon. She WEARS: A black shirt with the word SPORK on it, a spork necklace, blue jeans, a black spiked belt with a Spork belt buckle, and little brown boots./
Attitude- Hyper, bouncy, crazy, carefree, but she can become easily annoyed, has a short temper around guys especially./
Age- Around 18 [Teen]/
Extra- She loves sporks, and she likes eating, and climbing trees (she IS a squirrel after all)/
NOTE: I will not put anything in the fic if your character is "dating" one of the cast members, it obstructs the storyline. Plus, you can send in as many as TWO characters, I MAY make exceptions. And if you so choose to send in more than one character you MUST fill out the form for both characters. My email is vampsango@aol.com Place "FANFIC" in the subject line. Thank you! *HUG*