Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh. ~ George Bernard Shaw

Chapter Two

'I wish. . . that the House-Elves can take over our teaching duties sometimes,' Minerva said as she poured herself a cup of hot tea.

The first day of school had passed with its usual alacrity of heat, noise, and chaos. It was at the end of the day that the staff could have a relatively restive period as the students settled in their Common Rooms.

'Indeed,' Albus absently helped himself with Minerva's cup. Gathering the various reports together, he made several announcements before dismissing the staff.

'Oh, and before I forget, Fudge wrote to me to say he will be sending another inspector to our school.'

Amidst the loud protests, Albus' eyes twinkled. He had anticipated their reactions and found he was hitting all the right marks so far.

'Are you agreeing to his request again Albus?' Minerva screeched.

'It wasn't a request Minerva. It was an order.'

'It was a threat Headmaster, and you know it.' Under Severus' smooth tones lay anger. 'Only you would find all this amusing.'

'Now, now Severus. These inspectors are here to ensure that the school has followed the Ministry's instructions regarding the education system.'

'A poor excuse for spying on us Albus. Fudge does not trust us. Ever since you told him we have to go our separate ways, he has been suspicious of your motives. He worries about you more than he does about Voldemort. I agree with Severus. He is using his position to threaten you and control your movements. He thinks you'll influence the students to turn on him.' Jonathan Flitwick wisely observed.

'He hasn't succeeded in finding out anything, has he? Besides, we have good cause to celebrate. Fudge has removed the Dementors from the village. He needs them to guard Azkaban and St. Mungo's. It will appear that more have deserted him over the holidays and pledged their alliance with Voldemort.'

'Did he expect anything else? Oh, I forgot. He sent an invitation to the Dementors for hugs and laughter last week,' said Poppy sarcastically.

'When will he arrive Albus?' Ianthe Sinistra asked irritably. The last inspector had insisted on bringing back her records on the latest movements of the stars. Everyone knew he had thought there were plans encoded in them.

'Soon,' Albus waved his hand carelessly, 'There's nothing to worry about. We shall be our usual merry selves.'

A few of them snorted and his eyes twinkled even more.

'If he crosses any line, I'll hex him and send him tied to the worst broomstick back to Fudge,' Meredith Hooch growled.

'I am touched by your loyalty Meredith. But it is better to see how he is before judging. It is late. I'm sure you will need some sleep. Good night.'

Dismissed, the staff rose and headed for the door, but not without hearing Albus muse, 'Besides, what if he brought some lemondrops, or the best Earl Grey? We'll have to make him feel welcome.' Minerva gave Ianthe Sprout an exasperated look.

The staff room was now empty, save for Albus sitting at the table with his back facing the fireplace and one other. He looked at the darkest corner of the room. 'What is it Severus?'

He could not see the young professor clearly but perceived that he shifted his position from where he stood. 'I don't like this Albus.'

'My dear boy, the arrangements have been made. We shall do fine. The inspector should be the least of your worries.'

'It is. But it doesn't mean I have to like it,' came the stubborn reply.

Albus sighed, 'Come into the light Severus. Let me see you.'

The figure froze for a while. Then, Severus emerged form the shadows. 'Does anything ever escape you?'

'Too many things.' Albus took in the dark rings underneath the overly bright eyes and pale skin. 'You look dreadful.'

'It doesn't help to state the obvious,' Severus sat beside him, 'Especially when I had the same treatment from your precious trio.'

'Ah. . . and how were the Gryffindors and Slytherins today?'

'The same. Although Malfoy and his troops were surprised that Potter did not take up their challenge of sabotaging the Slytherins' ingredients. You should see the atrocious way Thomas pounded Crabbe right in front of my eyes after the latter made a sly remark about Miss Brown. I deducted twenty points and ten more when Thomas claimed he didn't deserve it.'

'Severus. . .' Albus smiled ruefully, not knowing what to say.

'It doesn't matter. I put up with that infamous Gryffindor naivete of seeing everything in black and white.'

'They are only children. It takes time to learn.'

'How much time do they have before. . . I had to deduct fifty points from Miss Granger for helping Longbottom again.'

'Was it fifty points because she helped him or because of her showing concern towards your health?'

Snape smirked, 'You are right. I shall deduct a hundred points from her tomorrow.'

'I know you will find a way. However, Minerva has told me she will counterbalance the score by rewarding Miss Granger for her excellent assignment.'

'That is disappointing.' Facing him, Severus caught Albus looking at him with anxiousness. 'Albus! Please, I've had enough from Potter and the couple today. You don't have to worry about me. You never told me,' he paused, 'You never told me why you wanted to tell them.'

'Surely you have figured it out?'

'If you mean you want to punish me for treating them unkindly. . .'

'Severus. . .'

'I hate the pity I see in their eyes. I don't deserve it. The next thing I know, they start forgiving me for things they did not see me do.'

Albus looked at him as Severus looked down at his hands. It struck him that deep down, Severus did not fully believe that he deserved his trust, and was afraid that. . .

'You will not turn Severus.'

'How do you know that, when I don't know it myself?'

'There is worry, but only for you. There is faith that I have in you,' Albus said sincerely.

'I exposed you to Harry and the others and I know what it must have cost you. I'm sorry.'

'Albus. . .'

'Child, I'm sorry. Truly. I wanted them to stop their night adventures before they aroused anyone's suspicions and compromised your safety. Mostly, however, I wanted them to see you, Severus. As you are. They may not understand you wholly, but they will appreciate and respect you. You deserve that much, Severus, and more.'

'Albus, I didn't do all this to be recognised.'

'I know, and that makes you all the more worthy of recognition and trust. I have faith in you.' Albus repeated.

Severus absorbed this. 'I have to patrol now.'

'Go to sleep.'

'I can't,' said Severus flatly.

'Then some warm milk is required,' Albus called on a House-Elf and forced Severus to empty the glass. Severus remarked dryly, 'Now that is one method I haven't tried.'

'Milk works. Why can't you sleep?'

'I can't.'

'What happens when you try to?'

'I stay awake.'

'Did you try Dreamless Sleeping Potion?'

'Yes.'

'It didn't work?'

'Not until the next day when I fell face down on my way to the Great Hall for breakfast. Thank Merlin it was the holidays then.'

'Are you referring to the incident during the weekend? We thought you had fainted.'

'I remember.'

'Severus, what's wrong? What did Voldemort do to you?'

Severus smiled in resignation, 'You deduced it.'

'How could I not? When you regained consciousness from that mysterious fever, your mood blackened for a long period of time. We were alarmed. You did not explain. All we know is Voldemort punished you for not succeeding in producing evidence for the Ministry to prove my connections with the giants. And now, you are telling me you are sufferring from insomnia.'

How to explain? Severus did not think it fair to burden the Headmaster with additional problems, especially his, when there were more pressing matters to be dealt with. Yet, this was Albus Dumbledore. He was honest enough to admit that although he prided in his intense privacy, he was always open with Albus.

'Do you recall the day when I went out for the first time after, as you said, cooping myself in the dungeons and my chambers since I took on teaching?'

'I always wondered how a man could loiter in those haunts of yours for ten months, let alone ten years,' Albus chuckled affectionately, 'Dear, dear, I never thought anyone could make those dungeons any more gothic and chilly. You proved me wrong.'

'And I never thought anyone could make the decorations in the Great Hall any more lurid during Valentine's than Lockhart could. To each his own.'

Severus lapsed into reverie. Albus wondered if the distraction would prevent him from going on. 'To return,' Severus said. 'I didn't know where to go specifically, so I Apparated to the quiet parts in England. The second and last destination was. somewhere in the North. I met a girl.'

Albus wisely refrained from commenting.

'She was fifteen or sixteen at the most. A sweet girl, utterly guileless. She wasn't afraid of me at all. She assumed I was a traveller and showed me around. I tried my best at first to chase her away. For all my expertise in offending and instilling loathing in people, she simply smiled at me. If anything, she was even more persistent in making me feel more welcome and comfortable. She was a wild little thing, like a nymph. I know magic wasn't involved, but I seemed as though I had no choice but to follow her. Later on, I realised I wanted to. For once, there was a person who didn't know me, who couldn't judge me. She had a serenity I've never seen in anyone else. I wanted to be a part of it. It. . . it made me feel free. When I was with her, amongst the most untainted scenery I've ever seen, a calm and peace I'd never felt before filled me. I spent the rest of the day and half the night with her, with her just talking on and on. Her voice's haunting Albus.'

'You didn't converse with her?'

'No.'

'That is inconsiderate,' Albus looked at Severus nervously, 'Did Voldemort. . .'

'No, he knows nothing of it,' Severus suddenly felt tired. Perhaps the milk worked after all. 'I told you because those are the memories I treasure most. When Voldemort first fell, everyone seemed to have learnt to move on. I didn't. I didn't know why I was in this world. I was empty, passing every day without aim. She showed me unintentionally that what I did against Voldemort was worth it. The world became a safer place for Muggles. I'm still not proud of what I did, but I've reconciled my conscience with myself to a certain extent. To me, it is sufficient to know an innocent girl is living because of what we did. With the memories she gave me, I was able in these years of teaching, to deal with life.'

'What Voldemort did to me was a new, morbid fancy of his. He tempered on the Memory Charms such that I would forget what I value most. I suppose he found it entertaining to see me cast even lower in the abyss.'

'If that were the case, how is it that you can still have these memories?'

'The Dark Lord is not only vengeful, but also intelligent. Where lies the pleasure of seeing someone who forgets everything and thus feels nothing? By making me understand the memories I possess have been partially erased, he makes me feel frustrated at my inability. I have a vague sense of what happened, but. . . but Albus, I've forgotten the most important parts. I've forgotten where it was exactly that I've met her. I don't know how she looks like. The impressions she left on my mind remain, but she's gone. Her essence is in me, but she's missing somehow. It's like a barrier. I rack my head in vain to break it so that I can remember. But I can't!' Severus angrily shoved his glass from the table, 'And I want it back Albus. I want what keeps my sanity back. He's already robbed me of my soul. He doesn't have the right to rule my mind as well.'

Albus allowed some minutes for Severus to calm down. He said, 'I wondered sometimes, what happened on that day you went out. You came back with such a light in your eyes I dared not hope for. I can see how tightly your guilt still grips you but since then you've gained your confidence back. You left as a ghost and came back alive, as Severus Snape again. Strength, temper and all.' He chuckled, 'I didn't know I have a Muggle girl to thank for it.'

Severus' wry humour asserted itself, 'I can appreciate the irony.'

'She must be twenty-two now.'

Severus gave a non-committal cough.

'Yes, well,' Albus smiled warmly, 'It'll be fine Severus. I'll ask Jonathan if he can help.'

'Thank you, but I doubt it. Tom Riddle may not excel in Potions, but he is certainly a forerunner in Charms. Don't worry about me.'

'Don't. . . There's something else.'

'Yes,' said Severus, 'I received an invitation to Lucius'. It's five days from today.'

'Severus, does it help for you to do this again?'

'There's always a chance.' Severus did not add it was a threadbare one at that.

Albus bowed his head. Severus was shocked to see the great wizard's shoulders slump.

'Albus. . .'

Albus sat up straight, all signs of age vanished. He smiled encouragingly.

'I'm all right. The question is, will you be?'

Albus lifted the Silencing Spell.

As they walked to the door, Severus said softly, 'I'll live.'

***

Adela woke up to the aromatic hints of toast and buttered eggs. Mildly surprised, she pushed her bed covers aside, got up and looked around. Seeing none of these items, she went to open her door, and almost stepped on her gift.

Bending down to pick up the breakfast tray, she spied a note slipped under the honey dish. Upon reading it, she sighed and brought the tray in,

{Hope you enjoy it. Graham. P.S. Can we meet for lunch?}

Adela made a mental note to pay Graham Collins in university. Sitting down at her table, she started writing to her uncle and aunt.

Uncle Samuel and Aunt Martha, or the Goodalls as they were known back home, were Adela's closest kin. Although they wanted to join her in the city, she assured them that she was fine. She did not disappoint them.

For the past four years, Adela managed to adapt herself to the completely different environment of the city. In many ways, she still missed the little village tucked in the valley, cut off by the hustle and bustle of urban life. She wished for the light-heartedness of childhood when she could abandon all the shackles of reality and immerse herself in the fantastical wilderness of nature. The visions of the luscious green hills, clouds lined with golden rays, and birds singing with the winds roved in her mind, visions that cannot be captured by the finest artist and his watercolours. Yet, university life suited her, and she was contented. History, music and mathematics appealed to her immensely.

Looking at the clock, she decided it was time to leave.

As she headed downstairs, she paused to admire the intricate paintings on the walls. Reaching the lobby of the inn, she noticed the usual activity amongst the lodgers and their housekeepers. The breakfast counter on left side of the first floor was packed.

'Mornin' sweetheart,' chirped the innkeeper.

'Morning Ma'am Robb,' said Adela brightly.

''Ow many times? Call me.' but Adela had already left the building, smiling as she welcomed another day. There was something oddly touching about the way the girl derived innocent pleasure from mundane things. As she rode her bicycle along the sidewalk, she waved at familiar faces, greeted the elderly sitting on park benches and viewed with wide-eyed wonder at all around her as if for the first time.

The hints of autumn were in the air. It was cooler now. The leaves were in deep shades of green. Flowers persisted in emitting enticing smells and colours in the park Adela passed through. Children chased each other as they played their games in all seriousness, yelling cries of victory and despair. Folks lost the strained look they had during summer. Being early, there were still not many cars on the roads and the noise was not yet deafening. Adela wondered if she would have time to visit a teashop as she passed it. Wonderful tea and pastries were sold there. Already, she could imagine herself sitting in a corner in the afternoon, sipping oolong at her leisure while poring over her notes.

Sooner than she expected, she arrived at her university.

***

'Friend, oh friend!' Lindsay Shelley came up noisily beside her classmate.

Adela grinned, 'What is it this time? Shakespeare?'

'Romeo and Juliet! Friend, oh friend, I have to start seeping in all the melodramas in our sorry world. Life, oh life, and not death. Oh Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?' Lindsay imagined herself in shimmering robes and covered with layer after layer of shawl.

'Mercutio,' prompted Adela.

'A plague o' both your houses. I am sped. I am peppered. A plague o' both your houses!'

'Ah, then I see Queen Mab hath been with you. She has prophesised my dear friend's unprecedented success on stage.'

'You should come for the auditions too.'

'What, I!' cried Adela in jest, 'I've never acted before Lindsay. Nevertheless, I shall accompany you to show my support.'

Lindsay observed Adela as she arranged her books in the locker. When she had first met her she could tell straightaway that Adela was no city dweller. Everything about her proclaimed her background. She seemed to bring with her the clean, refreshing breeze of the countryside. Her dress- up, while not old-fashioned, was certainly not of the trends in the city. Plain and simple, she did not put on cosmetics or any type of accessory.

Not that she needed any. With pale blond hair that flowed with the wind, unusual grey eyes that sparkled and pierced one's heart, flawless fair skin and willowy figure, Adela had to be the most angelic girl in the world. Lindsay wondered why she had few friends, she being Adela's closest. Part of it may be due to the snobbery or jealousy of other students. Part of it on the other hand, had to do with Adela herself. Adela was a very warm person and was worldly wise when necessary. Yet an ethereality which surrounded her produced two kinds of reactions: fear in some and allurement in others, like that of a moth which could not help being drawn to the street-lamp. It made her less approachable for some and Adela did not bother to seek friends out. She let everything take its course. Their friendship for one began with Lindsay running and crashing into Adela while she was reading her notes along the passage. For others, however, she was irresistible.

'How was lunch?' asked Lindsay.

She hastily put on a bland look when Adela turned slowly to face her.

'What, pray, is so interesting about lunch?' Adela's voice was deliberately hushed.

Lindsay was always caught surprised by Adela's sporadic sternness. For a tense moment, they stared at each other. Then, Lindsay started giggling, and Adela smiled along.

'You know who the culprit is? Alright, I confess!' Lindsay flung her arms up.

'It would have been so much easier if you told me about Graham.'

'It wouldn't have been more hilarious, would it? So, did you meet him?'

'I paid him in class, took a knife and went in search of you. Only, you were having lessons yourself, so I waited.'

'It's not my fault.'

'Oh, yes, Spartacus, it is.'

'He followed me around! Most days, I will be highly flattered if a man clung onto me. But he only wanted your address. In truth, he was getting annoying after one week. I figured it was either you or me who has to suffer.'

'You could have told me,' said Adela.

'What would you have done?'

'Tell him it was useless, and save us the embarrassment we just had. I don't know how to handle situations like this properly.'

'You,' Lindsay pointed at Adela, 'are plain priggish. You've been rejecting every invitation I know of.'

'I'm not interested in dating Lindsay.'

'We've covered that ground before. But let's try again. Are you attached?'

'No.'

'What's the problem then?'

'They are all really nice, but I haven't fallen in love with them.'

'Love! Who's talking about love? We're talking about dates. Dates that bring people together to see if they like each other.'

'You don't have to start dating to know if you like a person.'

Lindsay let the squabble rest as Adela turned back to close her locker. Someday, she would find who The One in Adela's life was, because, she knew, or so-help-her-God, that there was one. Adela had never mentioned him in the three years they had known each other, but whenever she was asked to comment on a certain guy, the answer was always, 'Fine.' The opposite sex was seen to be the same. Yet there was a glow in Adela whenever one talked of love, and it certainly was not the kind produced by dreams or imagination. It may be that Adela, who was unbelievably dense in these important matters, was unaware that in her heart, there was already someone who had placed himself firmly there. Lindsay only wished she could help her friend. That way, they could have a double date. This led her to remember asking her boyfriend, Henry J. Watson, who was also Adela's friend, why he was not attracted to Adela. His reply had relieved and saddened her.

'She's beautiful Lindsay, there's no denying it. But she doesn't belong. It's just this gut feeling, telling me she's meant for something else. I mean, look at her, talk to her. She's too perfect, too delicate for this place. I don't mean to sound dramatic and I can't explain this well. I think you know it too since you seem hurt by what I've said. She's more like a combination of ideal attributes than a real being.'

'But she is real!' Lindsay had protested.

'And that's what makes it worse,' Henry had concluded, 'She's isolated in a way no one can comprehend.'

'Penny for your thoughts deary.'

Lindsay snapped out of her reverie to find Adela smiling, but the worry in her eyes betrayed her.

'Sorry,' Lindsay grinned ruefully, 'I was thinking about Henry.'

Adela relaxed. 'You,' she chided gently, 'are hopeless.'

'And you, who believes love to be forever, are a hopeless romantic.' Lindsay tucked Adela's hand into the crook of her arm when a sudden maternal instinct overcame her. 'It's why we make such a lovely couple.' They laughed as they left their university for home.

***

Severus cursed himself inwardly. He should be accustomed to it by now, 'it' being a mild term to describe a party such as Lucius Malfoy's.

Why is it, Severus gritted his teeth as he walked past room after room, that Lucius deems it elegant to have bungling, drunk men sprawled over every inch of furniture available?

The palace of the Malfoys dated back to the late seventeenth century, when royalty still ruled and Napoleon had not conquered Louis XVIII. The Malfoys had their French origins traced back to the dark and disturbing Middle Ages. Though not of royal blood, they became intimately associated with His Majesty and were at their height of power then. As the years passed, the number in the family dwindled. Many in the Muggle line were lost in war and scandal, while the wizards left France in the fifteenth century to establish themselves in England. Bent on power they neglected their families. Now, there were only two Malfoy families left in this world, the one not acknowledging the other.

One could see that the Malfoy wizards did not lose their cultural background despite the crossover of countries. The gardens surrounding the paths leading to the main doors of the mansion were brimming with fleur-dys- lys and wild specimens which originated from France, Cannes to be precise. The palace itself was designed with Classical aspirations in mind. Polished marble made up part of the lower walls and steps. The long French windows were smuggled in during the Revolution when hundreds of nobles fled Paris for England. Climbing up the flight of twelve steps, one came to the imposing oak doors framed with tasteful gold leaves. The family motto on the coat of arms, which hung atop, must be read with objectivity. [Ne pas prendre de sang si vous pouvez l'aider] Cornelius Fudge saw it as the reflection of a highly respectable, philanthropic and honourable family whereas Severus Snape knew, through his relationship with Lucius and Lucius senior, that it meant not dirtying one's hands in any business by using more efficient and refined methods such as casting what are now termed as the Unforgivables.

When one entered the palace, he could not but be awed at it. Looking larger and more grandiose than it did outside, the bronze floors were polished such that one could see his image clearly. Every item, from the bust on the table to the chandelier high up the painted ceiling, was carefully chosen and harmonised with the surrounding. Behind each piece of furniture was a history of the ancestors and their achievements. The rooms were properly designated for various functions. The dining room, guest hall, public library and servants' quarters were situated on the first floor; the sleeping chambers and private library and study on the second. The corridors were dimly lit, and the walls were either covered with mirrors or paintings, both portraits and landscapes.

All in all, the Malfoy Palace boasted of magnificence and the family's wealth, but Severus did not care. The palace was simply a sharp contrast to the activities carried out within.

His stomach lurched forward when a person slumped across his path. Glassy- eyed, with bloated face and mouth opened with silent horror, the boy was merely thirteen by his looks.

And very much dead. Severus stepped over the body and walked on, radiating no sign of remorse but deep inside, he felt like punching every Death-Eater in sight.

I suppose that includes myself then. Severus gave a irrepressible snicker that threatened to become a sob. Years of self-discipline sobered him up as he stepped into the public library.

The small band of wizards considered as the lords of the rest of Voldemort's minions had already gathered inside. He heard the door shut behind him

'Severus, so glad you can make it. We were placing bets on your arrival or absence.' Lucius Malfoy indicated a seat graciously and waved a glass to Severus. 'I hope you are comfortable.'

Severus nodded curtly. If there were anything good no. . . worth admiring about Lucius, it was that he was a very generous host, albeit insincere.

'Wonderful. Let us hear each other's report, shall we?'

Everyone nodded tentatively. Since the return of the Dark Lord, the Death- Eaters who had been with him the first time worried about the probability of his vengeance. At each party thereof, Lucius would lead the small group into the library so they could exchange news of whether anyone had been summoned individually or possessed information not privy to others. They were certainly suspicious of another's treachery, but under the present circumstances, alliance pledged was more of an asset than arrogant independence.

Severus processed the reports in his mind. They were meager, as expected. Lord Voldemort was not so much of a fool to not know most of his followers were no longer loyal. Only fear and thirst for their own power kept them to him.

The meeting ended swiftly. The group filed out, leaving Lucius and Severus alone. They could hear a new outburst of activity. Familiar screams were drowned by high laughter and gurgling of blood. Lucius smiled contentedly.

'Shut the door,' Severus uttered irritably.

Lucius moved languidly in his chair as he took out his wand.

Severus felt strained whenever he was with Lucius. They were part of an elite group when they were students once. Lucius was the one who introduced him into it, for he recognised his talent. He was also the one who seemed more perceptible to his mood swings than anyone else. They laughed together once, in complete accordance with each other. They had no secrets to hide from each other since they played their tricks on the Gryffindors together. At all times, they covered each other's back. Although Severus found his own unique class and mannerisms at the end, he did start by imitating Lucius' courtly behaviour. Now that they were adults and no longer held the same convictions, Severus knew he could not return to the same plane of relationship on his part, despite his desire to. He was too appalled and repulsed by what they did. Nonetheless, he had to keep up the façade as things did not change in Lucius' opinion, at least, he hoped so.

Lucius laughed softly. 'You never change, do you Severus? You never care for these parties, even when we were young.'

'They have their usefulness,' said Severus smoothly.

'But you've never discovered their pleasures. Come, come, just this time, join in the recreation.'

'We've discussed it before Lucius. You know my sentiments.'

'Too well, only too well,' Lucius feigned disappointment, then said casually, 'I came across a rather charming woman tonight.'

'What would Narcissa think?' Severus matched his tone.

Lucius gave a mirthful snort, 'She's in Paris enjoying herself in the block- headed stage actor's apartment. You know very well she only returns during Draco's stay here. I would like to punish that wimp, but I suppose he's doing me a favour by getting rid of the bitch for me.'

'How uncharacteristically magnanimous of you.'

'It saves time and effort.'

'Naturally.'

'How is Draco?'

'I regret to say his intellect and cunning are nowhere near his father's. Ambition aside, he craves too much attention.'

'Ah. . . that is unfortunate,' Lucius frowned. 'I wonder. . .'

'You can't.'

'Why not?'

'Praecelus is an illegitimate child. Acknowledging him will damage your reputation and status.'

'How is he doing in Hogwarts?'

'For a Hufflepuff, he's passed all expectations. He's more advanced than some of his seniors.'

'He's a Malfoy,' said Lucius proudly, 'I suppose I'll need to think more about this.'

You won't touch him Lucius. I know your second son better than you do. Sentilia Livis has brought him up well. She was right not to let you near him.

'Oh come, I'm playing a very bad host to talk to you about family matters. Now, can I entice you with the woman I've mentioned?'

'No,' said Severus flatly.

'You are a very difficult guest Severus. We've picked a number of strays and vagabonds today. You wouldn't believe the number of filth and vermin that populate this country. We're doing our utmost to clean her up.'

'I wish you the best of luck,' Severus stood up, 'I have to go.'

'Pity,' but Lucius made no attempt to stop him.

Severus averted his eyes from the surroundings and hurried out. No one paid attention to him. Twice Severus could not prevent himself from seeing some Death-Eater stripping a Muggle's clothes away as he proceeded to devour her.

Look ahead, look ahead. . . Severus repeated the mantra to himself.

When he Apparated back to the outskirts of Hogwarts, he willed the choking smell of death, and whimpers of pleas away.

He went straight to his rooms after seeing Albus.

Author's Note:

The conversation between Albus and Severus about Severus taking Dreamless Sleep Potion is modified a bit from the episode "Night Five" in the season three of West Wing:

STANLEY Have you tried taking a sleeping pill?

BARTLET The third night.

STANLEY It didn't work?

BARTLET Not 'til the next morning in the middle of a national security briefing.

STANLEY Oh. That's no good.

[Ne pas prendre de sang si vous pouvez l'aider] is French for [Take no blood if you can help it].

Praecelus is derived from the Latin word 'praecellens' which means distinguished, excellent.

Sentilia is from 'sententia' which is sentiment.