Title: Elrond's Reasons For Choosing the Members of the Fellowship 3/6
Authors: The Elf and The Dwarf (Mayetra and Hedda)
Beta: Fireheart
Note: In compliance with FF.net policies we have censored this work- it's only one word and those of you with active imaginations can probably figure it out. If you are over the age of 18, you may join the Tortured Scribes Fan Fiction Yahoo Group to read the uncensored version TheTorturedScribes- subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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I guess I should go ahead and send Gimli, I mean all he does is sit around and drink our wine. Who died and made him my problem? His old man was in here begging and pleading for me to send him along. The good news is we're going to be getting a nice big shipment of Dwarven Ale. I really drove a hard bargain with Glòin. I mean I would've settled for fifty barrels but he must have really been desperate to agree to seventy-five. He actually broke down and cried when he talked about his idiot son breaking his axe on that goddamn Ring.
Gimli must really be playing with half a deck, I mean how fucking stupid do you have to be to hit THE ONE RING with an ordinary weapon. Even Orcs know that the only way to destroy it is to throw it into Mount Doom. Of course if Glòin is to be believed, Gimli has caused half a dozen cavern collapses in the last six months. No wonder Glòin is desperate to get rid of him. He is probably hoping the Balrog will smoke his ass like his dim cousin Balin.
According to Glòin, he actually slept with his brother's wife. It damn near caused a civil war and he was forced to bring him here. And I thought I had it rough with my offspring. He has no manners even for a Dwarf and that's saying a lot. If he had spit one more time during the council I think I would have lost my lunch. His beard looks like Orcs have been using it for a love nest. I couldn't tell if it was matted with dried food or Orc [Bleep].
Now about that daughter of mine.
TBC
Authors: The Elf and The Dwarf (Mayetra and Hedda)
Beta: Fireheart
Note: In compliance with FF.net policies we have censored this work- it's only one word and those of you with active imaginations can probably figure it out. If you are over the age of 18, you may join the Tortured Scribes Fan Fiction Yahoo Group to read the uncensored version TheTorturedScribes- subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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I guess I should go ahead and send Gimli, I mean all he does is sit around and drink our wine. Who died and made him my problem? His old man was in here begging and pleading for me to send him along. The good news is we're going to be getting a nice big shipment of Dwarven Ale. I really drove a hard bargain with Glòin. I mean I would've settled for fifty barrels but he must have really been desperate to agree to seventy-five. He actually broke down and cried when he talked about his idiot son breaking his axe on that goddamn Ring.
Gimli must really be playing with half a deck, I mean how fucking stupid do you have to be to hit THE ONE RING with an ordinary weapon. Even Orcs know that the only way to destroy it is to throw it into Mount Doom. Of course if Glòin is to be believed, Gimli has caused half a dozen cavern collapses in the last six months. No wonder Glòin is desperate to get rid of him. He is probably hoping the Balrog will smoke his ass like his dim cousin Balin.
According to Glòin, he actually slept with his brother's wife. It damn near caused a civil war and he was forced to bring him here. And I thought I had it rough with my offspring. He has no manners even for a Dwarf and that's saying a lot. If he had spit one more time during the council I think I would have lost my lunch. His beard looks like Orcs have been using it for a love nest. I couldn't tell if it was matted with dried food or Orc [Bleep].
Now about that daughter of mine.
TBC