Not my best work, I admit, and it's sad. But hey, it was inspired by a sad midi I was listening to at the time. That's also how I got the title by the way. Don't take this fic the wrong way either, Ken-kun's my favortie bishounen! ^_^ I love him, I love him, I dooo!! But I was in the mood for a sad fic ^^
Don't hurt me, fellow Ken fans! ^^
It's still raining. I can hear the soft sound of the raindrops as they fell from the sky, and see how they run down your face and mixed with your tears as you look down at me, golden hair plastered to your head. Your eyes, the color of jade, are laced with those tears and dark with sadness. The silent questions in those eyes:
Why? Why did you do that?
The answer's simple, I couldn't very well let you die. Could I, Yohji? Not you, or Aya, or Omi. But especially not you. After all, it's not every day that Ken Hidaka falls in love with Tokyo's biggest playboy. Stupid of me? Maybe. I don't know. Doesn't look like I ever will figure it out, after all.
I heard that when something like this happens, it's believed the body shuts down from shock and pain. I guess that's true. As soon as I pushed you out of the way and the bullet hit me instead of you, the intended target, everything seemed to shut down. I remember hitting the floor, but no pain or the sensation of my blood that I know is pouring from the wound in my chest, the same one your hand is pressed desperately to. I guess that's good though, ne? I'd rather just be able to concentrate on your beautiful face as you hold me, that soft rain soaking both of us.
Omi and Aya are nearby, did you know that? They're watching with sadness in their eyes, the same that's in yours. They remain standing where they are, even though you had shouted at them a few moments ago to call an ambulance or *something*. I don't blame them for not being able to, we all know it's no use.
Yohji? Hold me tighter, okay? I'm getting cold now, and it's slowly getting darker. Is it really that late already? Don't let me go, I want to remember this moment always. I've waited so long to feel your arms around me, the scent of cigarettes and cologne and something that's purely you assaulting my senses. I've wanted to tell you for so long how I feel about you, but it never seemed like the right time. You were always flirting with girls and going out on dates, and I could do nothing but watch you leave and hear you come back, sometimes not alone. It was on those nights that I thought my heart would break, but still, I couldn't stop loving you. And you know what? I don't regret not changing how I feel. Before you, I'd never been in love. And though my feelings were one sided, I'm glad I got to feel them before this moment.
My hand reaches slowly up, and it feels like it takes forever to reach your cheek. I watch with heavy-lidded eyes as you lean into my touch, murmuring my name. When you say it like that, it's so easy to believe you love me back. Can I pretend, Yohji, for just a moment?
I can feel my breathing slowing down now, and I can't seem to stop it. My body doesn't feel like my own anymore, but I don't know if I should feel frightened or relieved. Just a little while longer, Yohji. Hold me.
Once again, my eyes meet yours. Smile for me, please? I want to remember you that way, instead of sad. Sorrow doesn't suit you. You should be smiling like when we're teasing each other, the four or us. Aya never liked to admit it, but he liked to tease just like the rest of us. Please, Yohji, smile.
One more thing before this moment ends, Yohji. I want you to know that I'll wait for you, all of you. Be it in heaven or hell, I'll wait even if it takes years. And for your sake, beloved, I hope it does. You deserve more than to be lying on a wet ground, life slipping away with each drop of blood. Promise me you won't let it end this way for you, Yohji. And protect Aya and Omi, too. Even if it's never spoken aloud, they need protection, too. As do you.
I can't feel you anymore, Yohji. Or see you. I can hear you, though, calling out my name desperately, angrily, then sorrowfully. I'm sorry.
~*~
Three figures stood together in the rain, the tallest holding a limp body of a nineteen year old boy as tears continued to flow down his cheeks. As they turned to go, two precious words were swallowed up by the night.
"Aishiteru, Ken."
Don't hurt me, fellow Ken fans! ^^
It's still raining. I can hear the soft sound of the raindrops as they fell from the sky, and see how they run down your face and mixed with your tears as you look down at me, golden hair plastered to your head. Your eyes, the color of jade, are laced with those tears and dark with sadness. The silent questions in those eyes:
Why? Why did you do that?
The answer's simple, I couldn't very well let you die. Could I, Yohji? Not you, or Aya, or Omi. But especially not you. After all, it's not every day that Ken Hidaka falls in love with Tokyo's biggest playboy. Stupid of me? Maybe. I don't know. Doesn't look like I ever will figure it out, after all.
I heard that when something like this happens, it's believed the body shuts down from shock and pain. I guess that's true. As soon as I pushed you out of the way and the bullet hit me instead of you, the intended target, everything seemed to shut down. I remember hitting the floor, but no pain or the sensation of my blood that I know is pouring from the wound in my chest, the same one your hand is pressed desperately to. I guess that's good though, ne? I'd rather just be able to concentrate on your beautiful face as you hold me, that soft rain soaking both of us.
Omi and Aya are nearby, did you know that? They're watching with sadness in their eyes, the same that's in yours. They remain standing where they are, even though you had shouted at them a few moments ago to call an ambulance or *something*. I don't blame them for not being able to, we all know it's no use.
Yohji? Hold me tighter, okay? I'm getting cold now, and it's slowly getting darker. Is it really that late already? Don't let me go, I want to remember this moment always. I've waited so long to feel your arms around me, the scent of cigarettes and cologne and something that's purely you assaulting my senses. I've wanted to tell you for so long how I feel about you, but it never seemed like the right time. You were always flirting with girls and going out on dates, and I could do nothing but watch you leave and hear you come back, sometimes not alone. It was on those nights that I thought my heart would break, but still, I couldn't stop loving you. And you know what? I don't regret not changing how I feel. Before you, I'd never been in love. And though my feelings were one sided, I'm glad I got to feel them before this moment.
My hand reaches slowly up, and it feels like it takes forever to reach your cheek. I watch with heavy-lidded eyes as you lean into my touch, murmuring my name. When you say it like that, it's so easy to believe you love me back. Can I pretend, Yohji, for just a moment?
I can feel my breathing slowing down now, and I can't seem to stop it. My body doesn't feel like my own anymore, but I don't know if I should feel frightened or relieved. Just a little while longer, Yohji. Hold me.
Once again, my eyes meet yours. Smile for me, please? I want to remember you that way, instead of sad. Sorrow doesn't suit you. You should be smiling like when we're teasing each other, the four or us. Aya never liked to admit it, but he liked to tease just like the rest of us. Please, Yohji, smile.
One more thing before this moment ends, Yohji. I want you to know that I'll wait for you, all of you. Be it in heaven or hell, I'll wait even if it takes years. And for your sake, beloved, I hope it does. You deserve more than to be lying on a wet ground, life slipping away with each drop of blood. Promise me you won't let it end this way for you, Yohji. And protect Aya and Omi, too. Even if it's never spoken aloud, they need protection, too. As do you.
I can't feel you anymore, Yohji. Or see you. I can hear you, though, calling out my name desperately, angrily, then sorrowfully. I'm sorry.
~*~
Three figures stood together in the rain, the tallest holding a limp body of a nineteen year old boy as tears continued to flow down his cheeks. As they turned to go, two precious words were swallowed up by the night.
"Aishiteru, Ken."