A/N: I also changed some stuff from All That (like the names), but it's the
same concepts!
Chapter 1: Greatfellow and Bleu Cheese Man
Introduction: Ron, Harry, Hermione, Draco, Crabbe, Goyle, and Co. are all wondering the same thing:
Ron: Where in bloody hell is Neville?
Harry: Knowing him...he probably unknowingly touched an unassuming object that turned out to be a portkey and transported him to Japan or something.... (He said this very mindlessly)
Hermione: Harry! Don't be ridiculous!
*Mr. Filch walks in wearing Kevin's usual outfit and carrying a plate full of kiwis* Mr. Filch: The show's starting in five minutes! You'd BETTER be ready! *He walks out muttering 'blasted kids'.*
Harry: What're we going to do?
Draco: We can start without the fat lump; no one will notice he's missing anyway.
Ron: Don't make me curse you again...er....curse you!
*Hermione rolls her eyes at the boys' immaturity*
Suddenly, Neville comes out of nowhere and he's holding, of all things, a kiwi, and a 10 pound bag of rice. (really filled with feathers)
Hermione: Neville! Where did you come from, and why in Merlin's beard are you holding a kiwi and a bag of rice?
Neville: Filch offered me one from his plate of kiwis, but when I took it, it turned out to be a portkey and transported me to Japan! By the way, does anyone want some rice?
Harry gave Hermione an I-Told-You-So look. Hermione couldn't react to this because Filch inconveniently burst in again.
Filch: One minute! ONE minute till' the show starts! *He started to walk out with his teeth clenched muttering something that sounded like: Mrs. Norris...Purina Cat Chow Commercial* but Neville threw his bag of 'rice' at Filch and he passed out. All the cast members laughed for 59 seconds. The 'On Air' sign flashed.
Draco: C'mon guys, the show starts now!
Lee Jordan: Sit your derriere in your charier cause' its time for Allllllllllll That. *Theme song plays* It shows all the cast members wearing black muggle clothes and dancing. (A/N It's the same smiley face mascot, only this time it's canary yellow and it's wearing a witch's hat)* With a very special musical guest and special guest appearance!
*Song ends and camera zooms to a set of a very fancy restaurant. Hermione, Ron, and Neville are all eating at a table. Crabbe, Goyle, and Pansy are eating at another table. Suddenly Draco bursts in the door wearing a realistic costume of what appears to be a bottle of blue cheese dressing (Hidden Valley brand) with holes for his face and legs. (no holes for arms)*
Hermione: *screams* ITS BLEU CHEESE MAN!
Bleu Cheese Man: *Struggling as he walks* That's right, everyone better give me their salads NOW before I spew you all with my potent dressing! *laughs like Dr. Evil*
Ron: NO! THIS SALAD COST 20 GALLEONS! THAT'S MY BLOODY LIFE SAVINGS!
Bleu Cheese Man: Then prepare to be squirted! *He jumps up, which flings open the top of his costume. (A/N It's a flip top)*
*Everyone covers their heads, but just then, Harry 'flies' through an open window and crashes to the floor in front of Bleu Cheese Man.(BCM for short) There is conveniently a pink fluffy pillow for him to land on. He's wearing a tight blue shirt and polyester pants, with red underwear over the pants. He also has on a red cape and on his shirt in a circle is GF in big letters.*
Goyle: HEY! ITS GAYLORD FOCKER! Can I have your autograph?
Hermione: No! That's from Meet the Parents...its Greatfellow!
Greatfellow: That's right! I'm the defender of everything cheesy! *he puts his hands on his waist, an unearthly wind blowing his cape and hair back* And who's the cheese now? *Everyone points to BCM who is literally right in front of him* Oh yes, heh...silly me... (Goes red in the face)
BCM: Well if it isn't Greatfellow... I guess I'll have to squirt you first! Hahahahahaha *throws head back in laughter and stumbles as he almost falls over*
Pansy: NO! He's lactose intolerant!
Crabbe and Goyle: WHAT?
Hermione: Oh geez, it means he can't consume dairy products, duh!
BCM: GREAT! That will make this excursion much easier, Greatfellow say your last words!
Greatfellow: MOMMY!!! Oops, DADDY! Oops, HEDWIG!!!!!
BCM throws himself forward, he falls, and bleu cheese dressing is squirted toward Greatfellow. Hermione, however jumps forward and gets hit with the dressing instead.
BCM: HELP! I've fallen and I can't get up! *Everyone ignores him*
Greatfellow: Thanks Hermione, why'd you do that?
Hermione: Oh, because it was in the script. (McGonagall yells) Oops, I mean because you'd die from the bleu cheese dressing but I wouldn't because I'm not lactose intolerant.
Greatfellow: Well thanks, but I'm really not. (McGonagall yells again) I mean I am, but blimey! There's a milk steal at the Dairy Bank, gotta go! *He jumps out the window again* (OW! Who forgot to put the cushion down?!)
BCM: HEEEEELP!
Everyone: Shut up! *They get a gigantic bowl of salad and dump it on him. (Ron: "Here's your salad, mate!) A ton of bunnies start hopping to the set to eat it.*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~ End of Chapter 1. What do you think? I know this one kinda sucked but I'll try to make the next skits a little funnier! Please review!
Chapter 1: Greatfellow and Bleu Cheese Man
Introduction: Ron, Harry, Hermione, Draco, Crabbe, Goyle, and Co. are all wondering the same thing:
Ron: Where in bloody hell is Neville?
Harry: Knowing him...he probably unknowingly touched an unassuming object that turned out to be a portkey and transported him to Japan or something.... (He said this very mindlessly)
Hermione: Harry! Don't be ridiculous!
*Mr. Filch walks in wearing Kevin's usual outfit and carrying a plate full of kiwis* Mr. Filch: The show's starting in five minutes! You'd BETTER be ready! *He walks out muttering 'blasted kids'.*
Harry: What're we going to do?
Draco: We can start without the fat lump; no one will notice he's missing anyway.
Ron: Don't make me curse you again...er....curse you!
*Hermione rolls her eyes at the boys' immaturity*
Suddenly, Neville comes out of nowhere and he's holding, of all things, a kiwi, and a 10 pound bag of rice. (really filled with feathers)
Hermione: Neville! Where did you come from, and why in Merlin's beard are you holding a kiwi and a bag of rice?
Neville: Filch offered me one from his plate of kiwis, but when I took it, it turned out to be a portkey and transported me to Japan! By the way, does anyone want some rice?
Harry gave Hermione an I-Told-You-So look. Hermione couldn't react to this because Filch inconveniently burst in again.
Filch: One minute! ONE minute till' the show starts! *He started to walk out with his teeth clenched muttering something that sounded like: Mrs. Norris...Purina Cat Chow Commercial* but Neville threw his bag of 'rice' at Filch and he passed out. All the cast members laughed for 59 seconds. The 'On Air' sign flashed.
Draco: C'mon guys, the show starts now!
Lee Jordan: Sit your derriere in your charier cause' its time for Allllllllllll That. *Theme song plays* It shows all the cast members wearing black muggle clothes and dancing. (A/N It's the same smiley face mascot, only this time it's canary yellow and it's wearing a witch's hat)* With a very special musical guest and special guest appearance!
*Song ends and camera zooms to a set of a very fancy restaurant. Hermione, Ron, and Neville are all eating at a table. Crabbe, Goyle, and Pansy are eating at another table. Suddenly Draco bursts in the door wearing a realistic costume of what appears to be a bottle of blue cheese dressing (Hidden Valley brand) with holes for his face and legs. (no holes for arms)*
Hermione: *screams* ITS BLEU CHEESE MAN!
Bleu Cheese Man: *Struggling as he walks* That's right, everyone better give me their salads NOW before I spew you all with my potent dressing! *laughs like Dr. Evil*
Ron: NO! THIS SALAD COST 20 GALLEONS! THAT'S MY BLOODY LIFE SAVINGS!
Bleu Cheese Man: Then prepare to be squirted! *He jumps up, which flings open the top of his costume. (A/N It's a flip top)*
*Everyone covers their heads, but just then, Harry 'flies' through an open window and crashes to the floor in front of Bleu Cheese Man.(BCM for short) There is conveniently a pink fluffy pillow for him to land on. He's wearing a tight blue shirt and polyester pants, with red underwear over the pants. He also has on a red cape and on his shirt in a circle is GF in big letters.*
Goyle: HEY! ITS GAYLORD FOCKER! Can I have your autograph?
Hermione: No! That's from Meet the Parents...its Greatfellow!
Greatfellow: That's right! I'm the defender of everything cheesy! *he puts his hands on his waist, an unearthly wind blowing his cape and hair back* And who's the cheese now? *Everyone points to BCM who is literally right in front of him* Oh yes, heh...silly me... (Goes red in the face)
BCM: Well if it isn't Greatfellow... I guess I'll have to squirt you first! Hahahahahaha *throws head back in laughter and stumbles as he almost falls over*
Pansy: NO! He's lactose intolerant!
Crabbe and Goyle: WHAT?
Hermione: Oh geez, it means he can't consume dairy products, duh!
BCM: GREAT! That will make this excursion much easier, Greatfellow say your last words!
Greatfellow: MOMMY!!! Oops, DADDY! Oops, HEDWIG!!!!!
BCM throws himself forward, he falls, and bleu cheese dressing is squirted toward Greatfellow. Hermione, however jumps forward and gets hit with the dressing instead.
BCM: HELP! I've fallen and I can't get up! *Everyone ignores him*
Greatfellow: Thanks Hermione, why'd you do that?
Hermione: Oh, because it was in the script. (McGonagall yells) Oops, I mean because you'd die from the bleu cheese dressing but I wouldn't because I'm not lactose intolerant.
Greatfellow: Well thanks, but I'm really not. (McGonagall yells again) I mean I am, but blimey! There's a milk steal at the Dairy Bank, gotta go! *He jumps out the window again* (OW! Who forgot to put the cushion down?!)
BCM: HEEEEELP!
Everyone: Shut up! *They get a gigantic bowl of salad and dump it on him. (Ron: "Here's your salad, mate!) A ton of bunnies start hopping to the set to eat it.*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~ End of Chapter 1. What do you think? I know this one kinda sucked but I'll try to make the next skits a little funnier! Please review!