Chapter Five: Out of the Noise
Unlike a few hours ago, the factory was now full of people, some living a couple unliving, though not in the way Willow would like. Angel was standing close to the redheaded vampire just in case she decides to get up to some mischief. Willow was paying close attention to what Anya was doing asking and posing all kinds of questions to the ex-vengeance demon, which she found highly irritating. Oz was hovering close by, suspicious of Anya after her actions inside the bronze early tonight. Xander was standing close by Willow. Every now and then he would ask the vampire some inane question to which she would give short, often cryptic answers.
The factory door opens allowing Buffy and then Giles to enter the barren building. "I must be seeing things," Xander remarks seeing Buffy, "there's only one of you."
"Yeah, what can I say. My evil twin decided that she couldn't make it today," Buffy quips still irritated by her counterpart's words.
Giles grimaces at Buffy's flippant remark. "Yes, well. It seems Buffy has decided to take a short vacation, if you will, before returning to her proper reality." Buffy glances worriedly at Giles but doesn't say anything. "So you just go ahead and send her," he adds pointing at Willow, "back to her world."
Anya graces Giles with a frown as she responds to his order saying, "that might sound all fine and dandy, but do you even have the slightest inclination of what can happen if you constantly keep punching holes into different realities." She gives a short shake of her head just before continuing, "obviously not or you'd just stake the vampire and keep the extra slayer. The lower beings know you could use the help."
"What are you blathering about?" Giles asks taking a threatening step towards her.
Anya gives a slight sigh hating the fact that she was forced to deal with humans. It had been some much easier when she could just eviserate them and be done with it. "Each time you do the spell its like chipping away at a damn, eventually leaks are going to start springing up. Creatures, demons you've already dealt with here but didn't there, popping up all over the place. Don't know about you guys, but I'm not all that interested in running into the Master on some..."
"Wait a minute," Willow cuts in forcefully. "You knew this was possible before you did the spell the first time and you still did it?"
Anya rolls her eyes at Willow's naivete. "Like I had to worry about that. I was going to be a vengeance demon again. Immortal."
"You weren't concerned at all?" Giles questions her.
Anya ignores the question as she says, "if you not doing the spell I have a math test I must prepare to fail," she informs them picking up her backpack.
"What are we suppose to do with vamp Willow?" Xander finally asking the question nobody else wanting to.
Buffy looks at the red haired demon with hard eyes. "Looks like its the stake," she mutters dejectedly.
"You can't," Willow gasps.
The tiny slayer sighs as she replies saying, "I know. But we can't leave her running around loose."
Angel knew he could stake Willow if the need to arose, but wisely he keeps that to himself. "There is something that can be done."
Both Buffy and Willow look at him questioningly. "You don't mean?" Giles questions in disbelief.
"Yeah I do," he answers quickly.
Willow looks around at the suddenly stern faces surrounding her with something close to fear settling in the pit of her stomach. "Don't I have any say in this?" She demands fiercely.
"No," six voices say in unison.
Faith lay on the bed in her motel room staring up at the cracked, stained ceiling above her. She knew she should have gone back to her loft, but for some reason she didn't want to leave the small room. The slayer knew that both Buffy and Willow were being sent back to their world. Had probably been sent back already.
The simple truth was she just didn't want to be found right now so she was here. There was no need to worry about the scoobies showing up. Even if they weren't busy with the spell there still wasn't much chance of Buffy or her pals dropping by unexpectedly.
As for the Mayor. Well she would just have to deal with that if it came about.
A hard pounding on the thin door shakes it along with the door casing and the wall. Faith gives a slight start at the sudden sound as she springs off the bed. "Open up Faith!" Buffy shouts loud enough so everyone in town probably heard her. Again she pounds on the door which seems to bulge slightly under the pressure. "I know you're in there."
Faith moves to the door almost in the blink of an eye before Buffy can knock the door off its hinges. She pulls it open and then stares at her golden counterpart that she thought was suppose to be gone by now. For some reason she can feel a sense of relief flooding her body as she stares at Buffy. "What are you doing here?" She finally manages to ask once she remembers how.
"I'm not going back," Buffy answers pushing her way past Faith and into the small room. She jumps on the bed, doubting her choice as the bed comes close to collapsing under her. She bounces a couple of times with a worried look on her face until she comes to a stop.
That was something the brunette hadn't expected to hear come out of either Buffy's mouth. The blonde, this one even more so then the other, had always seemed honor bound, or duty bound to be the perfect slayer. The one that didn't shirk her responsibilities. Only her statement makes Faith stammer almost in shock as she asks, "huh? Wha? What the hell are you talking about?"
"After a lot of careful consideration," Buffy begins as she rolls over onto her side to face at Faith, "I decided to get the hell out when the opportunity presented itself."
Faith stares at the tiny blonde for a moment. "What about your duty? Your responsibility to protect the world?"
"You mean my death sentence?" Buffy inquires with a light sneer as she swings her legs off the bed. "Governor called in the eleventh hour granting me my pardon. Sorry if that bothers you so much," she adds getting off the bed. "I'll be getting out of your hair."
Faith grabs hold of Buffy's arm as she tries to push her way past the brunette, "I didn't mean it like that," she says locking eyes with the blonde. "It's just. I don't know... You just seemed so gung ho. Vampire. Lets go kill it," she says in gruff voice.
Buffy smiles lightly as she says, "I wasn't that bad."
"Close," Faith responds. "Angel's got the bruises to prove it."
"You did more damage then I did," Buffy replies.
"So?"
Buffy shrugs, "maybe the thought of going back to world were I didn't have nothing waiting for me except an early grave didn't appeal to me."
"You still got the same thing here," Faith replies.
"But at least here I got a friend," Buffy tells her softly.
"Yeah," Faith replies a bit moodily. Being close to the blonde when she had been going back to her universe wasn't a problem. There was no risk of disappointing her. Now with her staying here. Eventually everything was going to come to a head. "So you going to be staying with Mrs. S..."
Buffy snorts derisively giving Faith her opinion on the subject. "That bitch is here?" She snarls angrily sitting up on the bed. This wasn't something she had been expecting having assumed the same things may have taken place here that had in her world. Suddenly she wonders what else might be different between the two.
"Whoa, Mrs. S is cool," Faith replies defending Buffy's mother. The malice in the blonde's voice was nearly a palpable force, but there was also something else she could here in the petite girl's tone. "She's the only one that's treated me good since I got here."
"Then you must have Joyce confused with someone else," Buffy remarks as she eases to her feet. She paces the small room like a caged tiger. "Cause," she begins turning to face Faith, "when she found out about me being the slayer, about me having to fight vampires and keep people safe she had a nice padded room reserved for me. I was at the front door when Merrick showed up and pulled me out of there, out of Los Angeles, California completely. So don't go telling me about what a wonderful woman Joyce is. I know better," she growls softly.
"That's your Joyce not this one," Faith responds harshly. "Maybe she didn't do the same things here she did there. Who knows, maybe that's why you're such a prissy little bitch here. All because your mom didn't try to have you committed."
Buffy mutters something too unintelligible to make out as she spins around in a tight circle. It reminds Faith of an angry Yosemite Sam when things weren't going good for Bugs' arch nemesis. She can't help the soft laugh that escapes her mouth.
As the tiny blonde whirls back around on the taller girl; face nearly beat red, nostrils flaring, eyes almost bursting out of her head. Faith burst out laughing at the image that springs up in her head. Buffy with a thick blonde mustache, an exaggerated ten gallon hat, and a pair of six shooters strapped around her waist.
"What?" Buffy demands with a tight scowl thinking Faith has finally lost her mind.
Faith points at her still unable to talk from the gales of laughter that nearly have her bent double every time she looks at Buffy. Finally she grabs at hips as if drawing a pair of guns as she stomps around the room. The entire time doing a raucous Yosemite Sam monologue of unintelligible curse words.
Within seconds Buffy breaks down laughing at the Faith's antics. She has no idea what has gotten into the brunette, if she really has gone insane or not, but she looks funny doing it.
"You can't do this!" Willow rages as she strains against the chains securing her to the wall. "It's inhuman!"
"You sure those chains are going to hold her?" Xander asks as Willow struggles to reach Giles.
Angel shrugs as he replies saying, "they held Faith."
Buffy watches silently as Giles stands in front of the vampire. She was worried about his recent behavior. Nothing that shows on the outside, but sometimes like now he seems to go out of his way to torment a vampire. Usually it was Angel, which she understood, but right now it was Willow.
Giles stands just beyond the vampire's reach without flinching. "Yes well, you're not really human now are you?" Her inquires maliciously. Taunting her. Before Angel killing Jenny he had never taken personal pleasure in inflicting pain on a vampire.
They were nothing more then rabid animals in need of killing. That was all. Afterwards though the more pain one of them suffers before dying the more enjoyment he takes from the moment.
Willow locks her amber eyes with his soft brown orbs. "I'm not going to forget this," she assures him.
"I'm sure your not," he agrees. As he turns sharply Willow lunges for him again, but comes up well short as he walks calmly away from her.
"Which brings up another thing," Buffy says as she turns to face the two tall brunettes.
"What's that?" Xander questions.
"Wesley is so not going to like this," Buffy replies with a glint in her eyes. Tweaking her new watcher's nose, just to tweak it, was fast becoming one of her all time favorite things to do.
"I'm just surprised Giles had all the components for the spell," Angel remarks as the ex-watcher joins them.
Giles glares softly at the vampire for a brief moment before saying, "once I learnt of your return it seemed a prudent coarse of action to take. One never knows what might cause a moment of bliss after all." He may have to tolerate the vampire, for Buffy's sake, but it didn't mean he had to be friendly towards him. "Its the kind of thing one shouldn't become complacent about. Wouldn't you agree?"
Angel scowls at the librarian. It didn't matter what he did to make up for Angelus' actions Giles just wouldn't let the pass stay buried.
"Enough Giles," Buffy says tiredly. She was beginning to find it irritating to continually referee the two men. It was more Giles taking pot shots at Angel every chance he could get more then anything, but it was still irritating.
"Anyway," Giles continues after a moment, "as it turns out it was rather fortuitous that I did have them on hand."
"I'm ready guys," Willow calls from the top of the stairs. She waits a few seconds then disappears back into one of the second floor rooms.
"Good luck," Angel tells Giles as he ascends the winding staircase.
Willow paces, glaring at her three watchers. Walking back and forth she tugs on her bounds.
They thought they had her.
All because of the little whipped puppy.
They were all fools. She had received her training at the hands of the Master himself. If the puppy had been taught by the Master as she was he would have relished in whatever pain anyone inflicted on him. Even now he would be enjoying the pain, the suffering that the soul brings. Enjoy it so much it would lead to a moment of true bliss.
But he was weak.
He had been weak in her world and he was even weaker here.
He broke when he could have been so much more.
She would show them. She would cause so much misery and suffering that the bliss would be overwhelming. Then when the soul was gone she would ask them to put it back on just so she could feel it all over again, and again, and again until there was nobody left to put it back on.
In the meantime, while they thought they had another tame vampire on their hands, she would wreak so much havoc in their lives. Starting with the slayer, her pet puppy, and herself.
Faith strides silently down the corridors of Sunnydale's City Hall, a small smile playing at the corner of her lips. Buffy had finally fallen asleep on the bed allowing her to slip out of the motel room. The Mayor was waiting for her report, had probably been waiting for a while now.
Coming up to his office she knocks quickly before pushing the door open. "Hey there boss," she greets carefully as she steps into the room and pushes the door close behind her.
"Well now, if it isn't my girl Faith," Mayor Wilkens greets jovially. "Why you wouldn't believe the devil of a time I've had trying to track you down."
Faith grins lightly, "yeah. Sorry about that. Its just been a crazy day and I wasn't sure if one of Buffy's pals would stop by all unexpected like or something."
He steeples his fingers as he listens to her, swiveling in his chair from side to side. "How crazy of day? Have you heard if the witch is dead yet?" He inquires gleefully, a bright, expectant smile splitting his face.
"That's part of the craziness I need to tell you about," she answers. In quick, short sentences that he listens to with increasing interest the young slayer details the nights high lights. "I couldn't let them go and I couldn't take the chance of them spilling the beans."
"No, no, no. You did the right thing," he assures her.
"I hope they weren't important or anything," she says sincerely.
"Well you know good help is hard to find," he tells her seriously. "But loyalty is rather important as well and since they decided to jump onto somebody else's band wagon I don't think I can really call them good help now can I?" He inquires with a soft chuckle as he stands from his chair to walk around his desk. "And I already moved all my files so no risk there. What about this other Buffy? Do you really think she's planning on staying?"
Faith shrugs as she says, "yeah. She saw a way were she doesn't have to throw her life away for people who couldn't care less about her, hell..."
"Language Faith," Mayor Wilkens scolds her softly.
The brunette shrugs again. "...from the sounds of it her life's been as bad as mine."
"There are no bystanders here Faith," Wilkens says sternly leading Faith over to the window as he continues, "people are either with us or against us now Faith. We can't afford to have some wild card sitting on the sidelines. Not now."
"I know, just give me a couple days. She hates Buffy and her pals, doesn't much care for Mr. S either. She doesn't have a problem killing humans. A couple days and I'd be able to feel her out, find out if she'd be willing to work for you."
He stares out his window a speculative look creasing his face as he stares out into the predawn glow. "Two days," he says finally. "I'll have Marko keep a close eye on..."
"Don't," Faith says quickly. "Her training's more complete then mine. She can sense vampires, maybe even other demons almost fifty yards away."
The Mayor gives a slight nod of his head. "Alright. Just remember, two days."
Faith nods, "I will."
Wilkens listens as the young slayer exits his office. This was definitely not a part of his plan. He needs Faith isolated, alone, depending solely on him for her emotional support. Not developing new friendships with a Buffy from an alternate reality.
He waits a few minutes, giving Faith plenty of time to leave the building before going to his phone. "Send Marko up to my office. I got a rather urgent job for him and his crew."
Faith blinks as she hears the light whistling coming from the figure leaning against the squats building's white brick wall. She recognizes Buffy- alternate reality Buffy- instantly. It was the way she stood there, arms folded across her chest and a blank scowl smearing her lips. Its a look her twin from this reality wouldn't have been able to pull off to save her life.
They were barely a block from City Hall, but were well out of sight being situated behind several buildings. With a disgruntle sigh Faith walks over to the blonde.
"Hey," Buffy says by way of greeting as she straightens.
"Hey," Faith responds.
"What's up?" She questions in a mild tone.
Faith shrugs without apparent concern as she replies, "couldn't sleep so I figured I'd take a walk maybe get lucky and stake a few vamps while I was out." With that she begins walking back towards the motel.
Buffy falls in step next to her and the two walk down the road with a tense silence surrounding them. Half way back to the motel Buffy stops suddenly, her body becoming even more tense. Faith stops with her asking, "what is it?"
"Vamps," Buffy replies with a hungry glint in her eyes. "Five of them in that abandoned warehouse," she adds heading for the four story building.
This time its Faith that has to step quickly in order to keep up with the tiny blonde as Buffy marches directly for the front door. Without pausing she kicks the door in before disappearing from Faith's sight as she darts inside. Faith curses slightly as she follows Buffy inside.
The door swings close behind her. Faith spins to see Buffy standing in front of it. "What the..."
"Why?" Buffy growls cutting her off.
"The Vamps?" Faith reminds her.
"I lied," the petite slayer responds. "Must be catchy," she mutters loudly while striding across the floor to stand in front of the brunette.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Faith demands allowing her own anger to color her tone.
"I'm not stupid Faith so don't treat me like I am," she warns the younger girl with a heated glare. "How could you even stand being in the same room as that thing?"
"You're just like them," Faith hisses at her. "Just can't wait to start judging me, looking down at me."
"Right, because I wanna lose the only the friend I have," Buffy snorts. "Tell me there's a good reason for this. That you're undercover, trying to bring him down from inside," she pleads. She had heard the stories about slayers in the past going evil, but that was all she ever thought them to be. Stories, tales told by the watchers to keep their slayer in line. She had never thought they could be true, and she had definitely never imagined she would come across one. "Tell me anything except that you're working for the very thing we're called to destroy," the tiny blonde begs.
"What should I have done?" She storms tossing her hands in the air. "Let them drag me back to the mother land to re-educate me, or if that didn't work kill me so they could get the next in line. I don't think so. The mayor needs me, he cares about me," she adds shoving a finger at Buffy.
"Cares about you," Buffy gags as she brushes Faith's finger out of her face. "You're nothing but a weapon to him. Something that he can use and use up and toss..."
"Shut up!" Faith roars as her fist slams into Buffy's jaw dropping the blonde to a knee.
Buffy scowls up at Faith as she rises back to her feet. "Aside when..."
"Shut up!" She screams again as her other fist drops her to her other knee.
Again Buffy stands back up with the same look blazing across her face. "He's..."
"Shut up!" Faith swings again only this time the blonde blocks the punch.
Her return punch sends Faith sprawling to the concrete floor. "Finished with you," she finishes as Faith springs to her feet. With a wild scream she attacks at blinding speed.
Sweat beads on Willow's brow as she sits Indian style on the hard stone floor inside one of the mansions upstairs rooms as she chants in a lost ancient dialect. On her right is Giles, on her left is Oz each reciting a specific phrase in Latin while fanning the smoke that rises from the scented candles, and smoldering herbs with feathers. The orb of thesulah glows brilliantly for a moment before vanishing from sight.
A piercing, gut wrenching scream cuts through the otherwise silent night.
Buffy gawks in wonder as an etheral blue light erupts from Willow's eyes. Her back arching back nearly to the point of snapping in two as her keening wail continues to send chills up everyone's spine. It seems as if hours have passed since the tie when the vampire began her cry and when she finally drops to the ground like a marionette with her strings cut.
Willow chuckles softly to herself. The pain had been exquisite, was still exquisite. It was quite possibly the most wonderful sensation to ever course through her body.
Hearing the slayer and Xander rush forward she reminds herself that she is suppose to be suffering if her plan is to have any chance at success. Changing her giggling laugh into wrenching sobs as she looks at the two humans with tears beginning to flow from her eyes. "What... what's going on," she sputters meekly as she pushes herself back away from the pair. "Xander," she murmurs in wonder. Then a look of sheer horror washes over her face as she lets out a horrified gasp saying, "but I killed you."
"Its going to be okay," Xander reassures her trying to sound confident.
As if the previous expression wasn't enough she adds utter revulsion to it. "How can you say that?" She cries backing away even further. "I'm a monster... I've done things; horrible, cruel, vile, disgusting things and enjoyed every single one." Looking at Buffy hope shines in her eyes as she begs, "you're the slayer. You can kill me, you have to, to make sure I can't hurt anyone ever again."
Buffy shakes her head, "you got your soul now. You can be good again."
"I killed my entire family with joy! I deserve to be dead... You have to kill me," she pleads pitifully.
"I can't," Buffy replies simply her hand reaching out to the suffering creature before her.
Willow cringes away from her touch, as much because of her act as for the revulsion she feels toward the blonde. "Get... get away from me," she cries pushing herself back against the wall. "I'm not safe to be around... I might," she looks up at them with imploring eyes, "I might hurt you. So... Please, please just get away from me." With that she huddles in on herself allowing her body to shake slightly while she continues to sob.
Buffy and Xander look at each other for a moment before backing away. They had both thought they were going to be getting Willow back. It was only in retrospect that they realize they had. They got Willow with all the pain, guilt, remorse, and memories of having killed countless people.
"Let me," Angel says putting a gentle hand on Buffy's shoulder. "I do have a little experience dealing with this."
Buffy nods as she replies, "just help her." She hadn't realize it was going to be this bad, she had only seen Angel for a few minutes before sending him to hell. If she had maybe it would have given her the strength necessary to stake the image of her best friend.
She glances up in time to see Giles appear at the second floor railing padding his forehead down with his white handkerchief. She can only shrug at his questioning look.
Swinging her head back around she instantly grimaces at the sight of Willow with her arms wrapping around Angel as she buries her head into his shoulder. Deep sobs continueing to wrack her body as Angel engulfs the small girl an a tight embrace. There was something about seeing Angel hold someone that intimately, a way she would never be able to hold him for fear of what might happen, that set her blood boiling.
Unbeknownst to any of them, even as deep, gut wrenching sobs continue to wrack her small body, Willow grins slightly her face hidden by Angel's strong body.
Buffy was trying hard not to retaliate against the brunette coming at her with seemingly everything she had. It was hard, Faith's pain driven rage giving her the necessary edge to nearly match her. Every second the younger girl would come that much closer, and she was actually having to block about half her punches.
"Fight me," Faith growls throwing a hard roundhouse kick at Buffy's head. The blonde dodges the kick, barely, by ducking back fractionally to let the foot sail pass. Faith continues to spin, her backfist heading straight for her head. She blocks the punch and as Faith tries the same with her other hand Buffy pushes the brunette forward by shoving her in the back.
She didn't know why she wasn't fighting back. Her own temper was close to spilling over, but aside from that first punch she threw she felt it was important not to hit Faith again.
It was almost as if hitting Faith had hurt her more. Not physically, but somewhere deep inside of her chest. It had felt like someone had been able to put their hand around her heart and was squeezing the organ until it nearly burst.
Faith recovers quickly whirling back on Buffy, "why aren't you fighting me!" She screams charging forward. Again she's forced to dodge, block, and evade the brunette's high speed, high impact punches.
The same pain lances through her even now and she curses herself for lower her guard. For dropping her defenses and allowing somebody to get close enough to hurt her. She had thought she learnt those lessons a long time ago.
First with her father leaving her. Then with her mother trying to have her committed. Each had caused her to seal herself off just a little more. The final nail had been driven in a year and half ago in Baltimore when Merrick had died saving her life. Again.
Since then she had been going around looking for something to kill her off. She had known what she was doing. It was the reasons she went to Sunnydale instead of Cleveland in the first place. There was a master there- one of the truly old ones- while all Cleveland had was cadre of vampires and a few other various demons.
She should have died in Sunnydale.
Only she had wound up here in this Sunnydale because of some freaky magical accident. Then she had meant Faith and the sullen brunette had somehow struck a spark in her. Made her want to live again.
She was the reason she had stayed here instead of going back to her world.
Only she was working for the bad guys.
And she couldn't bring herself to fight her. Didn't want to fight her.
"Fight back!" Faith snarls again even though its the last thing she wants. Buffy stops her hard right fist easily. "Fight me!" She cries out.
"No!" Buffy shouts back. Lunging forward she grabs a handful of Faith's hair in each hand jerking her head straight.
"Let go of me," she hisses driving her knee into Buffy's side.
She moves with the impact bringing Faith with her when she refuses to let go. "No," she says again, softer, but no less fiercely. "I am not letting go of you," she adds a heartbeat later in the same passive tone.
Faith thinks she sees something deep in the blondes eyes for a moment. Its only for a moment because the next thing she knows her head is being pulled forward as Buffy moves in. A second later she finds herself being thoroughly, passionately kissed as Buffy tries to devour her whole with her mouth. For a brief instant she gives into the blonde's hunger as she returns the kiss with equal fervor.
Then her anger, her aggression, her rage reassert themselves and she flips the blonde to the concrete floor under their feet. It has the desired effect of breaking the kiss but Buffy keeps hold of her hair bringing her to the floor. With a quick move Faith soon finds herself under Buffy staring up into her possessive, desire filled eyes.
"I'm never letting go of you," she says in a soft, firm voice. A moment later her head descends again as she recaptures Faith's lips. She can feel the brunette responding underneath her just as she can feel her own heart beat like a trip hammer inside her chest as fear drags at her.
She shoves the emotion aside as she feels the soft, yielding, yet surprising hard body pressed beneath her. This is what she wants. This is what she has been denying herself her entire life.
Only there had never been anybody she could have shared herself with like this before, not her whole self. There was no one that she wouldn't have had to hold herself back with and if she couldn't love somebody with her whole being what was the point of loving anyone at all.
________________________________________________________________________
Standing Outside the Fire - Garth Brooks
We call them cool
Those hearts that have no scars to show
The ones that never do let go
And risk the tables being turned.
We call them fools
Who have to dance within the flame
Who chance the sorrow and the shame
That always comes with getting burned.
But you've got to be tough when consumed by desire
'Cause it's not enough just to stand outside the fire.
We call them strong
Those who can face this world alone
Who seem to get by on their own
Those who will never take the fall.
We call them weak
Who are unable to resist
The slightest chance love might exist
And for that forsake it all.
They're so hell-bent on giving, walking a wire
Convinced it's not living if you stand outside the fire.
Standing outside the fire
Standing outside the fire
Life is not tried, it is merely survived
If you're standing outside the fire.
There's this love that is burning
Deep in my soul
Constantly yearning to get out of control
Wanting to fly higher and higher
I can't abide
Standing outside the fire.
Standing outside the fire
Standing outside the fire
Life is not tried, it is merely survived
If you're standing outside the fire.