Credits: We do not own LotR obviously, although we wish so we could get
Legolas and possibly Aragorn. We also do not own Monty Python's Quest for
the Holy Grail, although we wish so we could have the Castle Anthrax.
*Spank us too!* lol! jk! And we also wish to say that coconuts ARE
migratory! They have cilia!
Again, we apologize for any grammatical or spelling errors. Cherry blames Kiwi's gimped computer. Kiwi agrees.
Chapter 3: Moral of the story.so far: for the sake of the characters, and the readers, don't place Merry and Pippin together as a couple! Remember, they are cousins! Well, then again, the authors do live in Kentucky.
Gimli groaned at this annoyance and splashed water on Legolas' face to get his attention*. They had to do something about this atrocity. These so called fanfictions insulted them all (Well, in the Aragorn/Arwen one, was that insulting to either of them? It was insulting to the other's minds but not personally.) Now, the other one mentioned was insulting to Legolas, but it did favor Haldir**. The other (there are many though) not only insulted Merry and Pippin but humiliated and horrified them. The other packets contained insulting stuff about the others. Gimli was particularly insulted when someone said that he was fat!! He had been on that weight loss system for months! He should have lost 90 pounds by now! Injustice***!!
After each of them had read a horror story of themselves, except Aragorn, they all met up and decided to end the horror. Their solution was:
A big bonfire. They gathered up the offending packets, except Aragorn, who folded up the fics involving him and Arwen and put them in his sack-o-stuff (what stuff, we're not sure, but possibly survival stuff, aka food, a pic of Arwen, etc. The sack now also contains the fanfics!) That evening, the Fellowship gathered together some kindling and made a huge bonfire. They had an enormous mountain of all the fanfics ever written about them, well, the ones they knew about to use as fuel! (F is for fire burning bright and red.****) They threw the first bunch into the fire ( and all of the authors, being bound to their writings, suddenly poofed into the circle of people around the fire. They screamed "Noooooooo!" (slow-mo) as it was too late. Frodo had a lot of fics on him, being carrier of the ring. He especially hated those where people decided to make him girlish! He threw them into the fire with relish, while more authors came. The air was filled with the cries of the authors. The Fellowship was shouting along with them, except they shouted for joy, not out of sadness. As soon as the sun began to rise, the authors poofed back to their homes in horror (we know its kinda weird with the poofing, but hey, it's a story!) Let's just say, see the moral.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*interlude Moral of the story as of now, including the above moral: Save your fics on the computer, unless its Kiwi's gimped computer.so save them on a discus***** as well except for Cherry's disk who raped Kiwi's computer instead of the other way around!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Cries of anguish were heard throughout the world as all the fanfiction authors awoke to the fiery morning, knowing that their creations were gone.
"Blast it!" cried fanfiction author #1! "Why didn't I save that one???" cried another. 'Why did I save mine to Cherry's disk and try to upload it on Kiwi's gimped computer?!" cried the third. The other two looked at him in sympathy and patted his back. "You have to admit, you were asking for that." Said the first. "True," said the second. "That was the stupidest mistake ever on your part!"
--Now, back to Middle Earth- Meanwhile, back in our non-descript forest somewhere in Middle Earth, hopefully in the direction the fellowship was headed, the fellowship awoke to a beautiful morning, rejoicing at the destruction of those horrible *things.* Aragorn woke up not as happy because he wondered how many of these packets of him and Arwen he had missed. His sack-o-stuff was now suspiciously heavier. He had managed to save quite a few. As the fellowship left camp, Aragorn lugged the bag around. He was obviously going slower than usual (although obvious only means Legolas was the only one to notice, also as usual), and he feared the other members would notice eventually. "What do you have in that sack that's making you go so slow today?" Legolas asked in curiosity. 'Blast it!' Aragorn thought, knowing his secret had been discovered.
"Oh nothing, nothing really. Nothing important." He lied. Those packets really interested him (Bad Aragorn! Very Bad Aragorn!).
'Well, if it is of no importance, why don't you get rid of it so we can travel quicker." Legolas suggested innocently, as he was getting suspicious.
"Well, you see, I did pick up this nifty little shrubbery. We will need it to get past the Knights who say 'ni'."
"Never heard of them before." Said Legolas.
"Wrong story!" said Gimli.
"Oh, Never mind. It's still nifty so I'm keeping it!" Aragorn stated petulantly.
"Fine, fine! Don't get your panties in a twist!" said Legolas.
"Are you suggesting that I wear Arwen's lacy underwear?!"
"You would know what her underwear looks like! And NO! We did NOT need to know!"
"I swear I've never seen her underwear before! I swear!"
"Then how do you know it was lacy?"
"um.I don't! I don't know anything about her underwear!"
"So then, you've been imagining it!"
"Why would I bother my brain with silly stuff like that?"
"*cough cough* no comment. You tell us!"
"I will tell you nothing!"
"So you ARE thinking about her underwear!"
"Alright! I admit it! But I don't know anything about what they look like."
"Suuuuuuuuure." Everyone just nodded and smiled. Aragorn sighed dejectedly. He began muttering something that sounded suspiciously like 'Thank God that argument ended when it did. They might have found out about last summer!' Although he did like thinking about her lacy panties. 'Thank God they didn't ask what kind of panties she wore!' He was inwardly relieved that they did not find out that it was not a shrubbery. Suddenly, Legolas turned.
"May I see that shrubbery?"
*****explained***** * the original sentence there was: Gimli groaned the splashed water on Legolas' face. **don't forget! We love that story! ***A Wufei quote for any of you who read/watch Gundam Wing **** *Cherry and Kiwi clear their throats and being singing* "F is for fire burning bright and red! U is for uranium *bombs!* N is for no survivors in this little town! No one will survive!" ***** discus in our term is latin for disk! Not really, but you kno, whatever.
--discus throwing is the sport in which you stand naked (as the Romans and
Greeks did) and throw floppy disks around! What fun!
Again, we apologize for any grammatical or spelling errors. Cherry blames Kiwi's gimped computer. Kiwi agrees.
Chapter 3: Moral of the story.so far: for the sake of the characters, and the readers, don't place Merry and Pippin together as a couple! Remember, they are cousins! Well, then again, the authors do live in Kentucky.
Gimli groaned at this annoyance and splashed water on Legolas' face to get his attention*. They had to do something about this atrocity. These so called fanfictions insulted them all (Well, in the Aragorn/Arwen one, was that insulting to either of them? It was insulting to the other's minds but not personally.) Now, the other one mentioned was insulting to Legolas, but it did favor Haldir**. The other (there are many though) not only insulted Merry and Pippin but humiliated and horrified them. The other packets contained insulting stuff about the others. Gimli was particularly insulted when someone said that he was fat!! He had been on that weight loss system for months! He should have lost 90 pounds by now! Injustice***!!
After each of them had read a horror story of themselves, except Aragorn, they all met up and decided to end the horror. Their solution was:
A big bonfire. They gathered up the offending packets, except Aragorn, who folded up the fics involving him and Arwen and put them in his sack-o-stuff (what stuff, we're not sure, but possibly survival stuff, aka food, a pic of Arwen, etc. The sack now also contains the fanfics!) That evening, the Fellowship gathered together some kindling and made a huge bonfire. They had an enormous mountain of all the fanfics ever written about them, well, the ones they knew about to use as fuel! (F is for fire burning bright and red.****) They threw the first bunch into the fire ( and all of the authors, being bound to their writings, suddenly poofed into the circle of people around the fire. They screamed "Noooooooo!" (slow-mo) as it was too late. Frodo had a lot of fics on him, being carrier of the ring. He especially hated those where people decided to make him girlish! He threw them into the fire with relish, while more authors came. The air was filled with the cries of the authors. The Fellowship was shouting along with them, except they shouted for joy, not out of sadness. As soon as the sun began to rise, the authors poofed back to their homes in horror (we know its kinda weird with the poofing, but hey, it's a story!) Let's just say, see the moral.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*interlude Moral of the story as of now, including the above moral: Save your fics on the computer, unless its Kiwi's gimped computer.so save them on a discus***** as well except for Cherry's disk who raped Kiwi's computer instead of the other way around!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Cries of anguish were heard throughout the world as all the fanfiction authors awoke to the fiery morning, knowing that their creations were gone.
"Blast it!" cried fanfiction author #1! "Why didn't I save that one???" cried another. 'Why did I save mine to Cherry's disk and try to upload it on Kiwi's gimped computer?!" cried the third. The other two looked at him in sympathy and patted his back. "You have to admit, you were asking for that." Said the first. "True," said the second. "That was the stupidest mistake ever on your part!"
--Now, back to Middle Earth- Meanwhile, back in our non-descript forest somewhere in Middle Earth, hopefully in the direction the fellowship was headed, the fellowship awoke to a beautiful morning, rejoicing at the destruction of those horrible *things.* Aragorn woke up not as happy because he wondered how many of these packets of him and Arwen he had missed. His sack-o-stuff was now suspiciously heavier. He had managed to save quite a few. As the fellowship left camp, Aragorn lugged the bag around. He was obviously going slower than usual (although obvious only means Legolas was the only one to notice, also as usual), and he feared the other members would notice eventually. "What do you have in that sack that's making you go so slow today?" Legolas asked in curiosity. 'Blast it!' Aragorn thought, knowing his secret had been discovered.
"Oh nothing, nothing really. Nothing important." He lied. Those packets really interested him (Bad Aragorn! Very Bad Aragorn!).
'Well, if it is of no importance, why don't you get rid of it so we can travel quicker." Legolas suggested innocently, as he was getting suspicious.
"Well, you see, I did pick up this nifty little shrubbery. We will need it to get past the Knights who say 'ni'."
"Never heard of them before." Said Legolas.
"Wrong story!" said Gimli.
"Oh, Never mind. It's still nifty so I'm keeping it!" Aragorn stated petulantly.
"Fine, fine! Don't get your panties in a twist!" said Legolas.
"Are you suggesting that I wear Arwen's lacy underwear?!"
"You would know what her underwear looks like! And NO! We did NOT need to know!"
"I swear I've never seen her underwear before! I swear!"
"Then how do you know it was lacy?"
"um.I don't! I don't know anything about her underwear!"
"So then, you've been imagining it!"
"Why would I bother my brain with silly stuff like that?"
"*cough cough* no comment. You tell us!"
"I will tell you nothing!"
"So you ARE thinking about her underwear!"
"Alright! I admit it! But I don't know anything about what they look like."
"Suuuuuuuuure." Everyone just nodded and smiled. Aragorn sighed dejectedly. He began muttering something that sounded suspiciously like 'Thank God that argument ended when it did. They might have found out about last summer!' Although he did like thinking about her lacy panties. 'Thank God they didn't ask what kind of panties she wore!' He was inwardly relieved that they did not find out that it was not a shrubbery. Suddenly, Legolas turned.
"May I see that shrubbery?"
*****explained***** * the original sentence there was: Gimli groaned the splashed water on Legolas' face. **don't forget! We love that story! ***A Wufei quote for any of you who read/watch Gundam Wing **** *Cherry and Kiwi clear their throats and being singing* "F is for fire burning bright and red! U is for uranium *bombs!* N is for no survivors in this little town! No one will survive!" ***** discus in our term is latin for disk! Not really, but you kno, whatever.
--discus throwing is the sport in which you stand naked (as the Romans and
Greeks did) and throw floppy disks around! What fun!