Chapter 1: In the hair of a man.
Stupid Sauron!
Stupid Men!
Stupid Elves!
They just had to go and wage war, didn't they? And now see where they are! All DEAD! except for me of course. Let's leave the finger to do all the work! So here I am, hanging in the hair of that stupid Isildur. Have these men never heard of hairbrushes? Sheesh, you could sustain an entire tribe of Uruks in here and he wouldn't notice! And he's got MY ring hanging around his filthy little neck! But I'll show him! I'll show them all! I'll get my ring back and wreath terror on Middle Earth! Mwahahahahahaha!!
Stupid Sauron!
Stupid Men!
Stupid Elves!
They just had to go and wage war, didn't they? And now see where they are! All DEAD! except for me of course. Let's leave the finger to do all the work! So here I am, hanging in the hair of that stupid Isildur. Have these men never heard of hairbrushes? Sheesh, you could sustain an entire tribe of Uruks in here and he wouldn't notice! And he's got MY ring hanging around his filthy little neck! But I'll show him! I'll show them all! I'll get my ring back and wreath terror on Middle Earth! Mwahahahahahaha!!