PART THREE
DECISIONS
This is the original part three of this series that I had never posted on ff.net until now (after a few requests). Hope you enjoy it!
Monica just stared at Chandler for a few seconds trying to figure out what she was going to say to him. She couldn't believe her ears. Chandler and Phoebe had slept together? It didn't make any sense and she wasn't sure that she wanted to hear any of the details.
"Mon, you okay?" Chandler finally asked her, breaking the silence.
"You tell me you slept with Phoebe and want to know if I'm okay?" She replied, trying to remain as calm as possible. She didn't know whether she wanted to yell or burst into tears. Instead she decided not to do either and wait to hear Chandler's explanation.
Chandler placed his hand on her's. He was worried about how quiet she was. Based on her initial reaction, he had anticipated there would be a lot of yelling involved, but she was just sitting there next to him, motionless, and apparently speechless.
"I'm sorry. I would have told you but it meant nothing. I didn't think it mattered." He told her as he continued to caress her hand. He felt as though she might reject anything more than that.
Monica gazed into his eyes, with a look more of confusion than anger. "I really wasn't expecting your big secret to be that you slept with one of my best friends. Especially Phoebe! That's what the shock is, I think."
"It was a shock to me too. I mean it just kind of happened." Chandler tried to choose his words carefully because he didn't want Monica anymore upset.
"How'd it happen?" Monica asked him, deciding that she wanted to know the story after all.
"We were both just really depressed. It was after I had first moved in. I didn't really have any friends, already hated my new job. And Phoebe had just broken up with her boyfriend. We were hanging out and one thing led to another. And that was it."
Monica placed her hand on Chandler's cheek and smiled at him. Even though she wished he'd never been with Phoebe, she was glad that he trusted the stability of their relationship enough to tell her the truth. "Thank you for telling me. I mean, I'm not jumping for joy or anything that you and Phoebe slept together, but it was only a one time thing. We all make mistakes." Chandler's smile disappeared and he looked down. "Chandler, it only happened once, right? Right?" She sternly asked him.
"Mon..." Chandler began, but was cut off.
"You and Phoebe had a relationship?!" Monica exclaimed, jumping out of the bed, in the same manner Chandler had done earlier that night. "I can't believe this!"
"Its not what you think." Chandler replied, hoping she would calm down.
"Well then what? So if things didn't work out with me were you just going to go for Rach next? Was that the plan?"
"We were only together like three times."
"Three times!?"
"Yeah and they were all rebounds. It meant nothing, Mon. I swear. After you and I got together nothing ever happened again."
Monica looked up at him and stopped her pacing. "Oh my God." She said with a slight realization in her voice.
"What?" Chandler asked her, concerned over the new tone in her voice. "What's wrong?"
"You and Phoebe were sleeping together up until you and I got together in London? Chandler how could you?!" Monica finally couldn't control her feelings anymore and burst into tears.
"Mon, Phoebe and I hadn't been together for at least at year before London. Sweetie, I would never hurt you. When she wanted to hook up, after you and I were together, I.."
"WHAT? She came onto you after you and I were together?"
"It was when no one knew about us."
"This is insane! I feel sick." Monica sat down on the edge of the bed.
"Mon, I already knew I loved you and I told her that she and I wouldn't be having sex ever again."
"Why didn't you tell me back then? Don't you think I had a right to know?"
"You didn't tell me who you'd slept with before we got together!" Chandler replied. "And don't even go there Monica. I had just as much a right to know that you'd been pregnant with my child and you know it."
"How dare you throw that in my face? You can't even compare the two things."
"That's right! You can't, because what you did was worse."
Monica stared at him in disbelief. "How can you say that to me? I told you why I did what I did."
"Yeah and I'm telling you that I did what I did for the same reasons. I didn't want to lose you."
"Would you have even told me about this if I hadn't told you about the miscarriage?" Monica asked him, as if she hadn't even heard his last statement.
"Honestly, I don't know." Chandler answered.
"Were you just trying to hurt me because I hurt you by keeping the secret?"
"Of course not! I wouldn't do that. You know me!"
"Maybe I don't know you! Maybe I don't know you at all!" Monica yelled, feeling the tears returning.
"Yeah, well maybe I feel that way about you too!" Chandler responded.
Monica turned her head to look at him again. "Well if that's how you feel then maybe we shouldn't get married! Maybe we were never supposed to be together at all!" She stood up and walked over toward the bedroom door and reached for the handle.
Chandler felt a lump forming in his throat, even though he was mad as hell at the moment. "Yeah, well that's fine! I guess we actually do agree on something for once! The wedding is off!"
"Yeah? Well so are we!" Monica hissed back. With that, the door flew open and she let it slam behind her as she hurried back to the apartment she had been sharing with Chandler for the past two years. She collapsed on their bed, letting the tears freely fall as she hugged her pillow as tightly as she could. She couldn't believe they had not only called off the wedding, but their relationship as well.
Chandler sat on the floor of his old bedroom with has back against the wall replaying the events of the night. Instead of thinking about his last night as a single guy, the only thought in his head now was the biggest fight he had ever experienced with Monica. He sighed deeply, and looked over at the clock on the nighstand, realizing it had been over an hour since Monica had stormed out.
When he closed the door behind him, he walked quietly over toward the bedroom he'd gotten so used to sharing with her. He stopped when he noticed her standing out on the balcony. After watching her for a few moments, he grabbed the blanket off the couch and headed out to join her. Neither one said a word as he placed the blanket over her shoulders. They stood in silence, both still trying to absorb everything that had taken place.
"Why are you here?" Monica asked after awhile.
"About the wedding..." Chandler began, but then stopped, not really sure how to finish the thought.
"What about it?"
"Is it really off?" He asked.
"You tell me. You're the one who cancelled it." Monica replied, in a voice shaky.
"I'm asking you what you want to do here." He said, seriously.
Monica turned to look at him. He could see she had more than likely spent the last hour crying. "I don't know, Chandler. Maybe if the groom hadn't been doing one of the bridesmaids, the bride wouldn't be so hesitant."
Chandler sighed, trying not to lose control. "Well maybe if the bride hadn't told the groom about a 12-year-old miscarriage the night before the wedding, the groom wouldn't be so hesitant."
"Stop acting like a little boy."
"Hey you're the one who accepted this little boy's marriage proposal."
"You are trivializing something that caused me a lot of pain. I never thought you would do that to me. I spilled my guts to you tonight because I thought you would understand, and give me some support. Not judge me." She turned away from him again, to try and avoid crying again. She felt like that's all she had done all night and didn't want to start again.
"Mon, I'm not trivializing it. I just wasn't expecting it." Chandler sighed again, hoping that he was getting through to her. "What happened between me and Phoebe was just sex. You're making something so big from something that meant absolutely nothing to me. And I told you because I thought you had a right to know. I know we agreed that we didn't have to tell each other all of our secrets....I just thought you should know."
"Weren't we just about sex in the beginning too?"
"Come on, Mon, it was always more than that. You know that. At least for me. Was it just about the sex for you?"
"You know it wasn't. But I just can't help but feel like...I don't know...how did you feel when you found out I was looking for Joey that night in London?"
"I felt hurt, Mon. And I was jealous and scared to think what would have happened."
Monica looked up at Chandler. "And that's how I feel. Only it did happen with Phoebe. And she's experienced with you the same things that I do now and that hurts me. I want to be the only one to have that with you."
"You are. I've never been unfaithful to you. And I never would be. What Phoebe and I had, or better yet, didn't have, can't even come close to comparing to what you and I have together."
"That doesn't help the hurt I'm feeling." Monica sighed.
"I can't change what happened."
"Neither can I. That's the whole point, Chandler."
"So I guess the question is, can we accept what happened years ago and move on?" He asked, inching a little closer to Monica. "Move on together." He added a second later.
"Is that what you want?" She asked, looking up at him.
"I'm asking you."
"I'm serious, Chandler."
"I am too. I need to know what you want, Mon."
"I want you. I want us to be together and I want to marry you." She smiled, relieved she'd gotten a chance to tell him.
"That's what I want too." He pulled her close to him and hugged her tightly. "I love you. And I'm so sorry for hurting you."
Monica buried her face in his chest, feeling happy they were back together again. "I love you too. And I know you never intended to hurt me."
Their eyes met and Chandler smiled at the woman who would be his wife in a matter of hours. "I know you never wanted to hurt me either."
"I'm sorry too." Monica told him as she leaned in to kiss him.
They held each other for a few minutes, just enjoying the kisses they were sharing. Neither one wanted to leave, even though the sun was starting to rise.
"I never want to break up with you again. That was the worst hour of my life." Monica finally said when the kissing ended.
"Even worse than when you lost the baby?" Chandler asked her, feeling a bit guilty for bringing up the subject again.
Monica nodded. "When I had the miscarriage, I lost something I never knew I had. When I thought I'd lost you, I don't know, it was just this empty feeling. I can't explain it."
"I felt it too. After tomorrow, I don't ever want to be away from you again." Chandler smiled and leaned in to kiss her one more time on the lips. Now let's get some sleep. We have a wedding in a few hours."
They made their way back into the apartment and kissed one last time before Chandler headed toward the front door and Monica toward their bedroom.
"I'll see you at the wedding, Bing." Monica smiled.
"See you then. Goodnight, Mon."
THE END!
DECISIONS
This is the original part three of this series that I had never posted on ff.net until now (after a few requests). Hope you enjoy it!
Monica just stared at Chandler for a few seconds trying to figure out what she was going to say to him. She couldn't believe her ears. Chandler and Phoebe had slept together? It didn't make any sense and she wasn't sure that she wanted to hear any of the details.
"Mon, you okay?" Chandler finally asked her, breaking the silence.
"You tell me you slept with Phoebe and want to know if I'm okay?" She replied, trying to remain as calm as possible. She didn't know whether she wanted to yell or burst into tears. Instead she decided not to do either and wait to hear Chandler's explanation.
Chandler placed his hand on her's. He was worried about how quiet she was. Based on her initial reaction, he had anticipated there would be a lot of yelling involved, but she was just sitting there next to him, motionless, and apparently speechless.
"I'm sorry. I would have told you but it meant nothing. I didn't think it mattered." He told her as he continued to caress her hand. He felt as though she might reject anything more than that.
Monica gazed into his eyes, with a look more of confusion than anger. "I really wasn't expecting your big secret to be that you slept with one of my best friends. Especially Phoebe! That's what the shock is, I think."
"It was a shock to me too. I mean it just kind of happened." Chandler tried to choose his words carefully because he didn't want Monica anymore upset.
"How'd it happen?" Monica asked him, deciding that she wanted to know the story after all.
"We were both just really depressed. It was after I had first moved in. I didn't really have any friends, already hated my new job. And Phoebe had just broken up with her boyfriend. We were hanging out and one thing led to another. And that was it."
Monica placed her hand on Chandler's cheek and smiled at him. Even though she wished he'd never been with Phoebe, she was glad that he trusted the stability of their relationship enough to tell her the truth. "Thank you for telling me. I mean, I'm not jumping for joy or anything that you and Phoebe slept together, but it was only a one time thing. We all make mistakes." Chandler's smile disappeared and he looked down. "Chandler, it only happened once, right? Right?" She sternly asked him.
"Mon..." Chandler began, but was cut off.
"You and Phoebe had a relationship?!" Monica exclaimed, jumping out of the bed, in the same manner Chandler had done earlier that night. "I can't believe this!"
"Its not what you think." Chandler replied, hoping she would calm down.
"Well then what? So if things didn't work out with me were you just going to go for Rach next? Was that the plan?"
"We were only together like three times."
"Three times!?"
"Yeah and they were all rebounds. It meant nothing, Mon. I swear. After you and I got together nothing ever happened again."
Monica looked up at him and stopped her pacing. "Oh my God." She said with a slight realization in her voice.
"What?" Chandler asked her, concerned over the new tone in her voice. "What's wrong?"
"You and Phoebe were sleeping together up until you and I got together in London? Chandler how could you?!" Monica finally couldn't control her feelings anymore and burst into tears.
"Mon, Phoebe and I hadn't been together for at least at year before London. Sweetie, I would never hurt you. When she wanted to hook up, after you and I were together, I.."
"WHAT? She came onto you after you and I were together?"
"It was when no one knew about us."
"This is insane! I feel sick." Monica sat down on the edge of the bed.
"Mon, I already knew I loved you and I told her that she and I wouldn't be having sex ever again."
"Why didn't you tell me back then? Don't you think I had a right to know?"
"You didn't tell me who you'd slept with before we got together!" Chandler replied. "And don't even go there Monica. I had just as much a right to know that you'd been pregnant with my child and you know it."
"How dare you throw that in my face? You can't even compare the two things."
"That's right! You can't, because what you did was worse."
Monica stared at him in disbelief. "How can you say that to me? I told you why I did what I did."
"Yeah and I'm telling you that I did what I did for the same reasons. I didn't want to lose you."
"Would you have even told me about this if I hadn't told you about the miscarriage?" Monica asked him, as if she hadn't even heard his last statement.
"Honestly, I don't know." Chandler answered.
"Were you just trying to hurt me because I hurt you by keeping the secret?"
"Of course not! I wouldn't do that. You know me!"
"Maybe I don't know you! Maybe I don't know you at all!" Monica yelled, feeling the tears returning.
"Yeah, well maybe I feel that way about you too!" Chandler responded.
Monica turned her head to look at him again. "Well if that's how you feel then maybe we shouldn't get married! Maybe we were never supposed to be together at all!" She stood up and walked over toward the bedroom door and reached for the handle.
Chandler felt a lump forming in his throat, even though he was mad as hell at the moment. "Yeah, well that's fine! I guess we actually do agree on something for once! The wedding is off!"
"Yeah? Well so are we!" Monica hissed back. With that, the door flew open and she let it slam behind her as she hurried back to the apartment she had been sharing with Chandler for the past two years. She collapsed on their bed, letting the tears freely fall as she hugged her pillow as tightly as she could. She couldn't believe they had not only called off the wedding, but their relationship as well.
Chandler sat on the floor of his old bedroom with has back against the wall replaying the events of the night. Instead of thinking about his last night as a single guy, the only thought in his head now was the biggest fight he had ever experienced with Monica. He sighed deeply, and looked over at the clock on the nighstand, realizing it had been over an hour since Monica had stormed out.
When he closed the door behind him, he walked quietly over toward the bedroom he'd gotten so used to sharing with her. He stopped when he noticed her standing out on the balcony. After watching her for a few moments, he grabbed the blanket off the couch and headed out to join her. Neither one said a word as he placed the blanket over her shoulders. They stood in silence, both still trying to absorb everything that had taken place.
"Why are you here?" Monica asked after awhile.
"About the wedding..." Chandler began, but then stopped, not really sure how to finish the thought.
"What about it?"
"Is it really off?" He asked.
"You tell me. You're the one who cancelled it." Monica replied, in a voice shaky.
"I'm asking you what you want to do here." He said, seriously.
Monica turned to look at him. He could see she had more than likely spent the last hour crying. "I don't know, Chandler. Maybe if the groom hadn't been doing one of the bridesmaids, the bride wouldn't be so hesitant."
Chandler sighed, trying not to lose control. "Well maybe if the bride hadn't told the groom about a 12-year-old miscarriage the night before the wedding, the groom wouldn't be so hesitant."
"Stop acting like a little boy."
"Hey you're the one who accepted this little boy's marriage proposal."
"You are trivializing something that caused me a lot of pain. I never thought you would do that to me. I spilled my guts to you tonight because I thought you would understand, and give me some support. Not judge me." She turned away from him again, to try and avoid crying again. She felt like that's all she had done all night and didn't want to start again.
"Mon, I'm not trivializing it. I just wasn't expecting it." Chandler sighed again, hoping that he was getting through to her. "What happened between me and Phoebe was just sex. You're making something so big from something that meant absolutely nothing to me. And I told you because I thought you had a right to know. I know we agreed that we didn't have to tell each other all of our secrets....I just thought you should know."
"Weren't we just about sex in the beginning too?"
"Come on, Mon, it was always more than that. You know that. At least for me. Was it just about the sex for you?"
"You know it wasn't. But I just can't help but feel like...I don't know...how did you feel when you found out I was looking for Joey that night in London?"
"I felt hurt, Mon. And I was jealous and scared to think what would have happened."
Monica looked up at Chandler. "And that's how I feel. Only it did happen with Phoebe. And she's experienced with you the same things that I do now and that hurts me. I want to be the only one to have that with you."
"You are. I've never been unfaithful to you. And I never would be. What Phoebe and I had, or better yet, didn't have, can't even come close to comparing to what you and I have together."
"That doesn't help the hurt I'm feeling." Monica sighed.
"I can't change what happened."
"Neither can I. That's the whole point, Chandler."
"So I guess the question is, can we accept what happened years ago and move on?" He asked, inching a little closer to Monica. "Move on together." He added a second later.
"Is that what you want?" She asked, looking up at him.
"I'm asking you."
"I'm serious, Chandler."
"I am too. I need to know what you want, Mon."
"I want you. I want us to be together and I want to marry you." She smiled, relieved she'd gotten a chance to tell him.
"That's what I want too." He pulled her close to him and hugged her tightly. "I love you. And I'm so sorry for hurting you."
Monica buried her face in his chest, feeling happy they were back together again. "I love you too. And I know you never intended to hurt me."
Their eyes met and Chandler smiled at the woman who would be his wife in a matter of hours. "I know you never wanted to hurt me either."
"I'm sorry too." Monica told him as she leaned in to kiss him.
They held each other for a few minutes, just enjoying the kisses they were sharing. Neither one wanted to leave, even though the sun was starting to rise.
"I never want to break up with you again. That was the worst hour of my life." Monica finally said when the kissing ended.
"Even worse than when you lost the baby?" Chandler asked her, feeling a bit guilty for bringing up the subject again.
Monica nodded. "When I had the miscarriage, I lost something I never knew I had. When I thought I'd lost you, I don't know, it was just this empty feeling. I can't explain it."
"I felt it too. After tomorrow, I don't ever want to be away from you again." Chandler smiled and leaned in to kiss her one more time on the lips. Now let's get some sleep. We have a wedding in a few hours."
They made their way back into the apartment and kissed one last time before Chandler headed toward the front door and Monica toward their bedroom.
"I'll see you at the wedding, Bing." Monica smiled.
"See you then. Goodnight, Mon."
THE END!