A Very Harry Christmas

Authors Notes

For decades there's been stories of men and of mice

Who've all found Christmas quite cozy and nice

But one horrendous day, two young girls met.

And there have never been scarier people yet.

These girls, they were bored and yet easily amused

Together their minds spawned a terrifying muse

We call our muse Webster, but no matter, it's all the same.

Don't show your mother this story, it will cause you shame.

So we gathered some books and some songs and some poems

To make stories more horribly horrendous than gnomes

With perverted visions dancing wildly in our heads,

Such as "Who is this 'Santa'? Does he look good in dreads?"

We took to writing - a scary feat, indeed!

For parodies, we figured, what talent do you need?

And we leave you with this, no more shall we say

Please send us money! And have a good day!

 
Author's Notes ver. Kali: Hello! Welcome to A Very Harry Christmas. Here, in true literary style, we are showcasing no, not one!, but several Christmas stories in true Harry Potter fashion. Each Chapter is a new song or story that is know all through the land of gumdrops and other such things - only different. Some of the chapters are written as song parodies, some are written as stories.

This fic will jump all over the map, generation wise, and cover various different events, or just steal the plot of some great Christmas story. It's a work-in-progress, but since it has no general plot, there is no guarantee how many chapters it will have or when it will be over. We're very flakey about that.

Lexi's Author's NotesTM: Rahaha. Well, Kali already explained everything for me, so my work here is done. She's the brains. I'm the..............and.........that's what. If you have any suggestions/requests, then feel free to suggest and/or request them. Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukah! I didn't spell that right! Joyous Kwanzaa! Feliz Navidad!

Disclaimer: We do not own Harry Potter or anything else we make fun of in here, for that matter. However, if you steal our ideas, we will beat you senseless, you crazy wanker.