Chapter Five is here…it's a bit longer than some of the others, so I apologize for that. But I love this chapter; I had a lot of fun writing it. Please enjoy and you know what to do once you're done: review!
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"The first duty of love is to listen."
--Paul Tilich
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"I could never hate you."
Rex looked over at Trixie as she stood on the edge of his porch, leaning over the railing. She wasn't looking at him, and he couldn't read her face, as she was expressionless. But as he looked at her, she began to look ever so slightly different to him. Before, he had dismissed her as a child. Well, no, dismissed was the wrong word…he hadn't dismissed her, he just had never looked at her as anything more than someone he was vaguely related to. She was Speed's girlfriend, and before that she had been his best friend. Rex had known her before he left home, but he hadn't really payed much attention to her. And he occasionally ran in to her whenever his path crossed with Speed's. But other than that, she had just sort of been someone who was there, and she was basically inconsequential to him.
However, Rex began to feel as though he was even closer to her than he was to the other members of his family. For years and years he had been, as she had said, living alone, in a barren world, propelling himself forward by thinking about all of the promises he had made to himself in his younger days. He shut himself off to the world; he had no friends, his only colleagues were the other racers (or, most recently, the people he secretly worked with as an agent), and no family. And he had told no one even the slightest little parts of some of the things he had told her tonight. But now, she knew more about him than anyone else, and he hated to admit it, but the way she looked at him made him feel as if she knew things about him that he didn't even know.
After staring at her for a few moments, he recognized just how violently she was shivering. He almost laughed when he thought about just how long the two of them had been standing outside, watching the snow fall from the sky. He at least had a long sleeved shirt on; she was only covered by her running attire. It did not take him more than three steps before he was at her side, which startled her a little bit, but when he put his hands on her shoulders, she did not recoil the way she had before. Instead, she looked up at him with both confusion and trust in her eyes.
"I can't believe how stupid I am…let's get you inside. I've already given you some bruises tonight, I'm not going to be responsible for giving you a fever." And with that, he led her in through the door, and she smiled shyly as they walked inside.
"I'm going to get you a blanket. Just stay right there for a minute." He disappeared in to one of the rooms, and Trixie breathed a sigh of relief. She had been incredibly cold outside, but she hadn't wanted to suggest going inside because it seemed like Rex had wanted to be outdoors. In her desire to hear his story, she had just done what she thought he had wanted. And she smiled slightly as it dawned on her that it had worked.
Rubbing her arms with her hands, she looked around the house for the second time, inspecting everything a little more carefully this time. It really was incredibly bare in that house; she didn't know how someone could live in such depressing surroundings. Then again, Rex was not exactly the perkiest guy she had ever met.
Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed some more photographs on a nearby table. Walking over to them, she realized that they were all photographs of the Racers. And she had seen them all before, as she had occasionally looked at the Racer photo albums with Speed. There was one of Speed where it looked like he was about four or five; his blue eyes were ridiculously large and he was smiling a thousand-watt smile, however, his two front teeth were missing. In his hand he held a miscellaneous fish and a fishing pole, and he was resting on Rex's shoulders.
She smiled and looked over at the others. There was one of Mr. and Mrs. Racer, standing arm in arm and smiling. Right next to that there was another one of Speed, except this one was of him looking about ten, and standing next to two other little children whom Trixie was rather embarrassed to notice were no other than Sparky and herself. And there was one more, a picture of all of the Racers looking basically the way they did now. It was a family portrait, with Speed and Pops standing next to one another as Mother and Spritle were seated in front of them.
And then, above the table, there were framed newspaper clippings; some of Speed's miscellaneous wins, others of important world events that had taken place. Trixie was quite taken aback when she noticed that there was one about her as well. The heading read, "Shimura Breaks State Five-Mile Record: Local Superstar Clocks in at 31:02". She remembered that race, as it had been the hardest one she ever ran, and Speed would not leave her alone for hours after the meet, as he had been so excited for her. That record still held, but she was so surprised that Rex even cared about that.
"These are the only pictures I have. I wish I had more, but I don't really have access to them." Rex said from behind her.
Trixie jumped and turned around. Rex smiled down at her put a blanket around her shoulders, which she gratefully accepted.
"I love that one with the fish; I remember the first time I saw that I did not stop making fun of Speed for two weeks."
Rex laughed. "Yeah, it really is a hilarious picture. But it has got to be my favorite."
Trixie turned around again, saying quietly, "But why do you have some of the others?"
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"Well, um," she didn't quite know how to put this, "Um, why do you have the newspaper story that's, you know…"
"About you?" he cut in, grinning. "I don't know, honestly. I saw it in the paper, and I remember thinking that it was such an incredible accomplishment. I mean, that really was a hell of a time; I could never do that."
"But that doesn't merit a framing."
"Of course it does; you're a part of the family." Rex said those words before he realized exactly how odd they sounded, and once more he inwardly kicked himself for speaking without thinking. He felt his face start to turn red as she looked up at him when he said that, and he turned around to walk away.
He walked over to a chair and sat down, putting his head in one of his hands. The mood had gone from comfortable to awkward in about two seconds flat. Really, he had no idea what he was thinking tonight. First he had frightened her to a degree that was so extreme he questioned whether or not she would ever really forgive him. Then, he had brought her here and subjected her to his ridiculous ramblings, probably giving her pneumonia in the process. And now, he looked up at her, and saw that she appeared incredibly uncomfortable…and rather sad.
It surprised him to see that she had pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders and turned her eyes to face the ground. She once again looked very small to him, and he didn't exactly know why, but she looked like she was now going to be the one to break down in to tears. He knew that what he had said was a little unorthodox, but he didn't exactly know what the cause of her tears was.
"Are you alright?" he asked her quietly, not moving from the chair. She didn't say anything, but turned away from him and walked back over to the photographs. Not liking her silence, Rex stood up, walked over to her, and gently pulled her around to face him. Her face was completely white, and her eyes were shut, but he could see tears rolling out of them.
"Hey, what is it?" he put his hands on her shoulders, then pulled her in to a very gentle hug, which she stiffened at, then pulled out of. She brought her hands up to her eyes, wiping the tears away, then removed the blanket from her shoulders and handed it to Rex.
"I want to go home." She whispered, in between her tiny sobs.
Rex had not seen that one coming at all, but once she said it, he began to feel as though he had been keeping her hostage here, and wondered if she had listened to him only because she was afraid that he would hurt her if she didn't. However, in spite of his guilt, he wasn't ready to take her home yet. No one starts crying for no reason, and if she was going to get him to bare everything to her, then she was not going to hide anything from him.
"I don't want you to go home. It is too late, and I don't think the roads are passable." He said these things with a mechanical tone to his voice, the previous care and emotion no longer present. It made him feel bad to lie to her, as this entire night had been about nothing but revealing the truth, but he didn't want to frighten her by saying that he didn't want her to leave while crying, and him not knowing why.
But Trixie was adamant, and looked up at him with fire in her eyes, along with the tears. "I want to go home…" she repeated. "And I'll walk if I have to."
She brushed roughly past him; clearly, she was not kidding. Rex was not keen at all, to say the least, at the prospect of her walking in the cold night all by herself, but he didn't move to stop her as she moved over to the door. She wasn't going anywhere until he said so.
Trixie pulled on the front door, but realized with a combination of fear and annoyance that it was locked. And not only was it locked, but it was locked in such a way that required a key in order to open it from the inside. She looked over at Rex, who smiled smugly at her, as if this were some kind of game to him. And indeed, he did think it was a bit funny, as he could only imagine how she would react to this.
And she fulfilled his expectations. "You've gotta be kidding me…" she said angrily. "Unlock the door!"
Rex just continued to smile and shook his head, in effect basically telling her, 'No way, kiddo.'
"This is so like you…exercising your control over the situation in order to get whatever you want."
"Yup."
"You are such a chauvinist!"
"I lock the door, and that makes me a chauvinist?"
"You don't let me leave when I want to; that makes you a chauvinist!"
"Really?" Rex said with amusement. He clearly was enjoying himself. "You don't say."
Trixie figured that her angry-girl approach was not working. So, she tried another.
"Come on, Rex, I'm really tired, can I please just go home?"
"If you're tired, sleep here."
Yet another thing that he said without thinking. Trixie glared at him as he gave her a playful leer, as if he were making some joke about…well, something not good.
"Now you're really a chauvinist." She groaned as he banged her head against the door. She had meant to do so gently as a symbol of her frustration, but she had forgotten about the cut on her forehead and immediately reeling backwards, yelling a swear word. Rex burst out laughing.
"I'm glad someone finds this funny." She said angrily to him. "Where the hell is your bathroom?"
Rex couldn't stop laughing; he just pointed his finger in the general direction of a door, which she stormed over to, walked in, and locked the door. Then she sat down on the floor and attempted to calm herself down. In a way, she was actually glad that she had been able to conceal her tears with her anger, as she did not feel ready at all to reveal the reason for them to a man she basically just met.
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Rex's laughter finally subsided after about five minutes; he thought to himself, 'Perhaps that wasn't the wisest thing to do.' He went over to the bathroom door and knocked.
"Hey, did you fall in? Or are you trying to escape through the window?"
The door opened to reveal a still rather huffy looking Trixie. She actually wished that she had thought of that window thing…but she hadn't actually been considering her escape. Although, now that he mentioned it, it probably wouldn't be a bad idea to do so.
"It was locked." She replied curtly. Rex smiled a devilish grin at her, for he knew that already.
"That's a fire hazard, you know." She walked past him and sat down on his couch, rubbing her eyes with her hands. Rex walked over and sat next to her, trying to meet her gaze, but she still looked annoyed with him and wouldn't make eye contact. He couldn't help but find this incredibly funny…she was actually really cute when she was angry.
"I can't believe that you turned out this way. I can remember you when you were really little, and you weren't anything like you are now." He said, chuckling.
"What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, still not looking at him.
"I mean, as a little kid, you were just so…you were just so different."
"No I wasn't."
"Oh yes you were. You weren't anything like you are now. I mean, you were such a tomboy, and you loved to beat up on Speed and Sparky when they were smaller than you."
"I miss those days."
Rex laughed once more. "And you were such a troublemaker! You all were. Okay, so I guess in that respect you are still the same."
Trixie looked over at him and elbowed him rather roughly, only making him chuckle a little harder. She really was a cute kid…although at almost nineteen years of age, she wasn't really a kid anymore.
"Yeah, well, you were supposed to be our example. And you got in to trouble all the time." She replied.
"But I was a teenager…teenagers are supposed to get in to trouble. You guys were too young to be doing some of the stuff you did."
"We just followed whatever you did!"
"Oh, you followed what I did, huh? As I recall you guys were pretty creative…"
"No we were not! We just followed the precedents that you set for us."
"Yeah, and I set such a precedent for you guys to climb down Mr. and Mrs. Peterson's chimney and steal their rum." Rex started laughing at the memory of that, and Trixie looked at him for a couple seconds as if he had spontaneously grown an additional ear, but then burst out laughing herself.
"That was Sparky…I had no part of that. And anyway, weren't you the one to steal all of those My Little Pony dolls from FAO Schwartz one year?"
"Excuse me, but that was a dare, and plus there is a big difference between stealing plastic horses and stealing alcohol. And you guys were, like, nine when you did that!"
"Well, you treated us as if we were older. You even called me a skank once."
"I never called you a skank!"
"You so did, on that night that the three of us got together to go to that Under-21 dance club. You took one look at my outfit and called me a dirty skank who was corrupting his precious younger sibling."
"You were ten! You didn't have the necessary body parts to qualify for such a name calling!"
"I hit puberty early. And what about that other time when you and your friends stole all of my textbooks and filled my backpack with Cheerios and milk? I never understood that one, exactly…"
"That was only after you and Speed and Sparky put raw cookie dough in my prom shoes! I had to go in my sneakers!"
"Yes, but why the Cheerios? I don't get it…"
Rex couldn't help it; he just could not stop laughing. Trixie was laughing too, however, so he didn't feel bad. This was an incredible feeling; he couldn't remember laughing this hard for a long time. And he was happy to see Trixie apparently having a good time as well. He had been worried about her earlier, as she had seemed rather upset at something that he still hadn't exactly figured out, but now she was fine. The serious mood of before had completely vanished, leaving them room to enjoy each other's company.
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The laughter did not subside for a long time. Each time they thought it would die, they just took one look at each other and started up again. And of course, it didn't help when Rex had a moment of remembrance and said completely randomly, "Oh, I did call you a skank." Then he had paused and said, "I'm sorry." Trixie thought that was the most hilarious thing she had ever heard, and wound up falling to the floor, clutching her stomach and practically crying with laughter.
But eventually, it did die down, and now the two of them were just sitting together in silence. It was a good silence, though, not an awkward and painful one like the one they had been in earlier. Every so often they would look at one another, smile, and then quietly turn away once more. Each one of them seemed to be lost in their own world of thoughts.
Rex was thinking about how much he had really missed this. Sitting with her, he felt like a part of a family, like a member of a circle of people that would offer him support and love no matter how many mistakes he made. And it seemed ironic that it was Trixie, as opposed to Speed, or his father, or his mother, that apparently was bringing him back to the world of honest human connection and understanding. He had barely known her before tonight, and now, she was incredibly dear to him.
He considered everything that he had at that moment, and everything that he had the day he left home. At the present time, he had two wonderful careers that made him feel incredibly fulfilled (albeit they didn't exactly provide him with a safe lifestyle), and he had the ability to help others while still remaining anonymous, which he preferred as opposed to being publicized and made out to be something that he wasn't. But on the other hand, he had given up his parents, and his younger brother. He had given up the opportunity to experience all that time with them, and every time that he had found himself in some exotic location like Paris or Africa, he always wondered what was going on in the quiet household back home.
Trixie was also thinking about her new connection with the eldest Racer son. There was so much to him, and it both thrilled her and humbled her to hear the life story that she had for long wanted to her suddenly told out to her in great detail. She felt blessed to have been able to hear Rex's story, but more than that, she felt blessed just being able to see him. The sight of him was beautiful, and that didn't mean that she thought of him as physically attractive (although he was—that couldn't be denied). Instead, it meant that for what seemed like the first time in her life she was able to look at another human being and see his entire life reflected on his face. Every day spent question whether or not he was doing the right thing, every single time he asked himself if he was being selfish, every single sleepless night; everything was written within the contours of his jaw, cheeks, and eyes.
After a while, Rex heard Trixie sigh and get up to her feet slowly. He didn't move, but watched her walk back over to where his pictures were sitting on the table. She stood there looking at them, and for no apparent reason, she spoke quietly and said, "You must really miss them."
Rex lowered his gaze to the ground. "More than you can imagine."
"No, I can imagine pretty well."
She paused for a moment, and then said almost inaudibly, "I wish that you would go back to them so much."
Rex brought his hands up and rubbed his temples. "Sometimes I wish the same thing myself."
"Then why not do it?" her voice, as if it were possible, had gotten even quieter.
"I thought I explained that to you already." Rex didn't like getting back in to this conversation, as he didn't think it would get him anywhere, and it would just depress the both of them.
"You did. But that doesn't mean I think that you are right."
Rex stood up with a groan. "I'm probably not right, but for the moment, I can't go back. It just isn't time. I need more time."
He turned and headed for headed for the kitchen. "I'm going to make you some tea; I think you still have a chill." He hoped that by saying that the conversation would end.
But he could just barely hear her say something as he walked. "You don't have as much time as you think you do, Rex. Time is not something you should play with. I speak from experience on that one."
Her words baffled him at first, and he went through the motions of putting water in a kettle and setting it on the stove. But the realization slowly dawned on him; her tears from earlier when he mentioned her being part of the family, her strong adherence to her opinion that he should return immediately no matter what the cost, her quiet ruminations on time and how it is not, contrary to many people's belief, limitless.
He went slowly back out to the living room, where she was still staring at the photographs, except she had tears in her eyes once more. Rex walked over to her, and put an arm on her shoulder, watching her intently as she refused to meet his gaze, for clearly she knew that she would lose control if she did. Her strength was admirable, but Rex did not think that she was doing herself any favors by acting like this. Being strong was a good quality, but its value could only be applied to so many situations.
"Oh Trixie," he breathed. "I understand now." And with that he pulled her in to a gentle hug, which she neither returned nor resisted. Except he felt her lose her iron clad control as her body began to tremble with silent sobs. Her arms, once rigid against such a hold, slowly came up and clutched his back as she returned the embrace. The connection that was established by their words earlier was intensely amplified as they finally began to fully comprehend each other's losses.
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Okay, got that one done. I think I'm only going to make one more chapter, so this will all be resolved soon, I promise! But what exactly will be resolved, you ask? Well, you'll just have to read to see. ;)
Review! Gimme gimme gimme!
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"The first duty of love is to listen."
--Paul Tilich
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"I could never hate you."
Rex looked over at Trixie as she stood on the edge of his porch, leaning over the railing. She wasn't looking at him, and he couldn't read her face, as she was expressionless. But as he looked at her, she began to look ever so slightly different to him. Before, he had dismissed her as a child. Well, no, dismissed was the wrong word…he hadn't dismissed her, he just had never looked at her as anything more than someone he was vaguely related to. She was Speed's girlfriend, and before that she had been his best friend. Rex had known her before he left home, but he hadn't really payed much attention to her. And he occasionally ran in to her whenever his path crossed with Speed's. But other than that, she had just sort of been someone who was there, and she was basically inconsequential to him.
However, Rex began to feel as though he was even closer to her than he was to the other members of his family. For years and years he had been, as she had said, living alone, in a barren world, propelling himself forward by thinking about all of the promises he had made to himself in his younger days. He shut himself off to the world; he had no friends, his only colleagues were the other racers (or, most recently, the people he secretly worked with as an agent), and no family. And he had told no one even the slightest little parts of some of the things he had told her tonight. But now, she knew more about him than anyone else, and he hated to admit it, but the way she looked at him made him feel as if she knew things about him that he didn't even know.
After staring at her for a few moments, he recognized just how violently she was shivering. He almost laughed when he thought about just how long the two of them had been standing outside, watching the snow fall from the sky. He at least had a long sleeved shirt on; she was only covered by her running attire. It did not take him more than three steps before he was at her side, which startled her a little bit, but when he put his hands on her shoulders, she did not recoil the way she had before. Instead, she looked up at him with both confusion and trust in her eyes.
"I can't believe how stupid I am…let's get you inside. I've already given you some bruises tonight, I'm not going to be responsible for giving you a fever." And with that, he led her in through the door, and she smiled shyly as they walked inside.
"I'm going to get you a blanket. Just stay right there for a minute." He disappeared in to one of the rooms, and Trixie breathed a sigh of relief. She had been incredibly cold outside, but she hadn't wanted to suggest going inside because it seemed like Rex had wanted to be outdoors. In her desire to hear his story, she had just done what she thought he had wanted. And she smiled slightly as it dawned on her that it had worked.
Rubbing her arms with her hands, she looked around the house for the second time, inspecting everything a little more carefully this time. It really was incredibly bare in that house; she didn't know how someone could live in such depressing surroundings. Then again, Rex was not exactly the perkiest guy she had ever met.
Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed some more photographs on a nearby table. Walking over to them, she realized that they were all photographs of the Racers. And she had seen them all before, as she had occasionally looked at the Racer photo albums with Speed. There was one of Speed where it looked like he was about four or five; his blue eyes were ridiculously large and he was smiling a thousand-watt smile, however, his two front teeth were missing. In his hand he held a miscellaneous fish and a fishing pole, and he was resting on Rex's shoulders.
She smiled and looked over at the others. There was one of Mr. and Mrs. Racer, standing arm in arm and smiling. Right next to that there was another one of Speed, except this one was of him looking about ten, and standing next to two other little children whom Trixie was rather embarrassed to notice were no other than Sparky and herself. And there was one more, a picture of all of the Racers looking basically the way they did now. It was a family portrait, with Speed and Pops standing next to one another as Mother and Spritle were seated in front of them.
And then, above the table, there were framed newspaper clippings; some of Speed's miscellaneous wins, others of important world events that had taken place. Trixie was quite taken aback when she noticed that there was one about her as well. The heading read, "Shimura Breaks State Five-Mile Record: Local Superstar Clocks in at 31:02". She remembered that race, as it had been the hardest one she ever ran, and Speed would not leave her alone for hours after the meet, as he had been so excited for her. That record still held, but she was so surprised that Rex even cared about that.
"These are the only pictures I have. I wish I had more, but I don't really have access to them." Rex said from behind her.
Trixie jumped and turned around. Rex smiled down at her put a blanket around her shoulders, which she gratefully accepted.
"I love that one with the fish; I remember the first time I saw that I did not stop making fun of Speed for two weeks."
Rex laughed. "Yeah, it really is a hilarious picture. But it has got to be my favorite."
Trixie turned around again, saying quietly, "But why do you have some of the others?"
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"Well, um," she didn't quite know how to put this, "Um, why do you have the newspaper story that's, you know…"
"About you?" he cut in, grinning. "I don't know, honestly. I saw it in the paper, and I remember thinking that it was such an incredible accomplishment. I mean, that really was a hell of a time; I could never do that."
"But that doesn't merit a framing."
"Of course it does; you're a part of the family." Rex said those words before he realized exactly how odd they sounded, and once more he inwardly kicked himself for speaking without thinking. He felt his face start to turn red as she looked up at him when he said that, and he turned around to walk away.
He walked over to a chair and sat down, putting his head in one of his hands. The mood had gone from comfortable to awkward in about two seconds flat. Really, he had no idea what he was thinking tonight. First he had frightened her to a degree that was so extreme he questioned whether or not she would ever really forgive him. Then, he had brought her here and subjected her to his ridiculous ramblings, probably giving her pneumonia in the process. And now, he looked up at her, and saw that she appeared incredibly uncomfortable…and rather sad.
It surprised him to see that she had pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders and turned her eyes to face the ground. She once again looked very small to him, and he didn't exactly know why, but she looked like she was now going to be the one to break down in to tears. He knew that what he had said was a little unorthodox, but he didn't exactly know what the cause of her tears was.
"Are you alright?" he asked her quietly, not moving from the chair. She didn't say anything, but turned away from him and walked back over to the photographs. Not liking her silence, Rex stood up, walked over to her, and gently pulled her around to face him. Her face was completely white, and her eyes were shut, but he could see tears rolling out of them.
"Hey, what is it?" he put his hands on her shoulders, then pulled her in to a very gentle hug, which she stiffened at, then pulled out of. She brought her hands up to her eyes, wiping the tears away, then removed the blanket from her shoulders and handed it to Rex.
"I want to go home." She whispered, in between her tiny sobs.
Rex had not seen that one coming at all, but once she said it, he began to feel as though he had been keeping her hostage here, and wondered if she had listened to him only because she was afraid that he would hurt her if she didn't. However, in spite of his guilt, he wasn't ready to take her home yet. No one starts crying for no reason, and if she was going to get him to bare everything to her, then she was not going to hide anything from him.
"I don't want you to go home. It is too late, and I don't think the roads are passable." He said these things with a mechanical tone to his voice, the previous care and emotion no longer present. It made him feel bad to lie to her, as this entire night had been about nothing but revealing the truth, but he didn't want to frighten her by saying that he didn't want her to leave while crying, and him not knowing why.
But Trixie was adamant, and looked up at him with fire in her eyes, along with the tears. "I want to go home…" she repeated. "And I'll walk if I have to."
She brushed roughly past him; clearly, she was not kidding. Rex was not keen at all, to say the least, at the prospect of her walking in the cold night all by herself, but he didn't move to stop her as she moved over to the door. She wasn't going anywhere until he said so.
Trixie pulled on the front door, but realized with a combination of fear and annoyance that it was locked. And not only was it locked, but it was locked in such a way that required a key in order to open it from the inside. She looked over at Rex, who smiled smugly at her, as if this were some kind of game to him. And indeed, he did think it was a bit funny, as he could only imagine how she would react to this.
And she fulfilled his expectations. "You've gotta be kidding me…" she said angrily. "Unlock the door!"
Rex just continued to smile and shook his head, in effect basically telling her, 'No way, kiddo.'
"This is so like you…exercising your control over the situation in order to get whatever you want."
"Yup."
"You are such a chauvinist!"
"I lock the door, and that makes me a chauvinist?"
"You don't let me leave when I want to; that makes you a chauvinist!"
"Really?" Rex said with amusement. He clearly was enjoying himself. "You don't say."
Trixie figured that her angry-girl approach was not working. So, she tried another.
"Come on, Rex, I'm really tired, can I please just go home?"
"If you're tired, sleep here."
Yet another thing that he said without thinking. Trixie glared at him as he gave her a playful leer, as if he were making some joke about…well, something not good.
"Now you're really a chauvinist." She groaned as he banged her head against the door. She had meant to do so gently as a symbol of her frustration, but she had forgotten about the cut on her forehead and immediately reeling backwards, yelling a swear word. Rex burst out laughing.
"I'm glad someone finds this funny." She said angrily to him. "Where the hell is your bathroom?"
Rex couldn't stop laughing; he just pointed his finger in the general direction of a door, which she stormed over to, walked in, and locked the door. Then she sat down on the floor and attempted to calm herself down. In a way, she was actually glad that she had been able to conceal her tears with her anger, as she did not feel ready at all to reveal the reason for them to a man she basically just met.
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Rex's laughter finally subsided after about five minutes; he thought to himself, 'Perhaps that wasn't the wisest thing to do.' He went over to the bathroom door and knocked.
"Hey, did you fall in? Or are you trying to escape through the window?"
The door opened to reveal a still rather huffy looking Trixie. She actually wished that she had thought of that window thing…but she hadn't actually been considering her escape. Although, now that he mentioned it, it probably wouldn't be a bad idea to do so.
"It was locked." She replied curtly. Rex smiled a devilish grin at her, for he knew that already.
"That's a fire hazard, you know." She walked past him and sat down on his couch, rubbing her eyes with her hands. Rex walked over and sat next to her, trying to meet her gaze, but she still looked annoyed with him and wouldn't make eye contact. He couldn't help but find this incredibly funny…she was actually really cute when she was angry.
"I can't believe that you turned out this way. I can remember you when you were really little, and you weren't anything like you are now." He said, chuckling.
"What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, still not looking at him.
"I mean, as a little kid, you were just so…you were just so different."
"No I wasn't."
"Oh yes you were. You weren't anything like you are now. I mean, you were such a tomboy, and you loved to beat up on Speed and Sparky when they were smaller than you."
"I miss those days."
Rex laughed once more. "And you were such a troublemaker! You all were. Okay, so I guess in that respect you are still the same."
Trixie looked over at him and elbowed him rather roughly, only making him chuckle a little harder. She really was a cute kid…although at almost nineteen years of age, she wasn't really a kid anymore.
"Yeah, well, you were supposed to be our example. And you got in to trouble all the time." She replied.
"But I was a teenager…teenagers are supposed to get in to trouble. You guys were too young to be doing some of the stuff you did."
"We just followed whatever you did!"
"Oh, you followed what I did, huh? As I recall you guys were pretty creative…"
"No we were not! We just followed the precedents that you set for us."
"Yeah, and I set such a precedent for you guys to climb down Mr. and Mrs. Peterson's chimney and steal their rum." Rex started laughing at the memory of that, and Trixie looked at him for a couple seconds as if he had spontaneously grown an additional ear, but then burst out laughing herself.
"That was Sparky…I had no part of that. And anyway, weren't you the one to steal all of those My Little Pony dolls from FAO Schwartz one year?"
"Excuse me, but that was a dare, and plus there is a big difference between stealing plastic horses and stealing alcohol. And you guys were, like, nine when you did that!"
"Well, you treated us as if we were older. You even called me a skank once."
"I never called you a skank!"
"You so did, on that night that the three of us got together to go to that Under-21 dance club. You took one look at my outfit and called me a dirty skank who was corrupting his precious younger sibling."
"You were ten! You didn't have the necessary body parts to qualify for such a name calling!"
"I hit puberty early. And what about that other time when you and your friends stole all of my textbooks and filled my backpack with Cheerios and milk? I never understood that one, exactly…"
"That was only after you and Speed and Sparky put raw cookie dough in my prom shoes! I had to go in my sneakers!"
"Yes, but why the Cheerios? I don't get it…"
Rex couldn't help it; he just could not stop laughing. Trixie was laughing too, however, so he didn't feel bad. This was an incredible feeling; he couldn't remember laughing this hard for a long time. And he was happy to see Trixie apparently having a good time as well. He had been worried about her earlier, as she had seemed rather upset at something that he still hadn't exactly figured out, but now she was fine. The serious mood of before had completely vanished, leaving them room to enjoy each other's company.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
The laughter did not subside for a long time. Each time they thought it would die, they just took one look at each other and started up again. And of course, it didn't help when Rex had a moment of remembrance and said completely randomly, "Oh, I did call you a skank." Then he had paused and said, "I'm sorry." Trixie thought that was the most hilarious thing she had ever heard, and wound up falling to the floor, clutching her stomach and practically crying with laughter.
But eventually, it did die down, and now the two of them were just sitting together in silence. It was a good silence, though, not an awkward and painful one like the one they had been in earlier. Every so often they would look at one another, smile, and then quietly turn away once more. Each one of them seemed to be lost in their own world of thoughts.
Rex was thinking about how much he had really missed this. Sitting with her, he felt like a part of a family, like a member of a circle of people that would offer him support and love no matter how many mistakes he made. And it seemed ironic that it was Trixie, as opposed to Speed, or his father, or his mother, that apparently was bringing him back to the world of honest human connection and understanding. He had barely known her before tonight, and now, she was incredibly dear to him.
He considered everything that he had at that moment, and everything that he had the day he left home. At the present time, he had two wonderful careers that made him feel incredibly fulfilled (albeit they didn't exactly provide him with a safe lifestyle), and he had the ability to help others while still remaining anonymous, which he preferred as opposed to being publicized and made out to be something that he wasn't. But on the other hand, he had given up his parents, and his younger brother. He had given up the opportunity to experience all that time with them, and every time that he had found himself in some exotic location like Paris or Africa, he always wondered what was going on in the quiet household back home.
Trixie was also thinking about her new connection with the eldest Racer son. There was so much to him, and it both thrilled her and humbled her to hear the life story that she had for long wanted to her suddenly told out to her in great detail. She felt blessed to have been able to hear Rex's story, but more than that, she felt blessed just being able to see him. The sight of him was beautiful, and that didn't mean that she thought of him as physically attractive (although he was—that couldn't be denied). Instead, it meant that for what seemed like the first time in her life she was able to look at another human being and see his entire life reflected on his face. Every day spent question whether or not he was doing the right thing, every single time he asked himself if he was being selfish, every single sleepless night; everything was written within the contours of his jaw, cheeks, and eyes.
After a while, Rex heard Trixie sigh and get up to her feet slowly. He didn't move, but watched her walk back over to where his pictures were sitting on the table. She stood there looking at them, and for no apparent reason, she spoke quietly and said, "You must really miss them."
Rex lowered his gaze to the ground. "More than you can imagine."
"No, I can imagine pretty well."
She paused for a moment, and then said almost inaudibly, "I wish that you would go back to them so much."
Rex brought his hands up and rubbed his temples. "Sometimes I wish the same thing myself."
"Then why not do it?" her voice, as if it were possible, had gotten even quieter.
"I thought I explained that to you already." Rex didn't like getting back in to this conversation, as he didn't think it would get him anywhere, and it would just depress the both of them.
"You did. But that doesn't mean I think that you are right."
Rex stood up with a groan. "I'm probably not right, but for the moment, I can't go back. It just isn't time. I need more time."
He turned and headed for headed for the kitchen. "I'm going to make you some tea; I think you still have a chill." He hoped that by saying that the conversation would end.
But he could just barely hear her say something as he walked. "You don't have as much time as you think you do, Rex. Time is not something you should play with. I speak from experience on that one."
Her words baffled him at first, and he went through the motions of putting water in a kettle and setting it on the stove. But the realization slowly dawned on him; her tears from earlier when he mentioned her being part of the family, her strong adherence to her opinion that he should return immediately no matter what the cost, her quiet ruminations on time and how it is not, contrary to many people's belief, limitless.
He went slowly back out to the living room, where she was still staring at the photographs, except she had tears in her eyes once more. Rex walked over to her, and put an arm on her shoulder, watching her intently as she refused to meet his gaze, for clearly she knew that she would lose control if she did. Her strength was admirable, but Rex did not think that she was doing herself any favors by acting like this. Being strong was a good quality, but its value could only be applied to so many situations.
"Oh Trixie," he breathed. "I understand now." And with that he pulled her in to a gentle hug, which she neither returned nor resisted. Except he felt her lose her iron clad control as her body began to tremble with silent sobs. Her arms, once rigid against such a hold, slowly came up and clutched his back as she returned the embrace. The connection that was established by their words earlier was intensely amplified as they finally began to fully comprehend each other's losses.
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Okay, got that one done. I think I'm only going to make one more chapter, so this will all be resolved soon, I promise! But what exactly will be resolved, you ask? Well, you'll just have to read to see. ;)
Review! Gimme gimme gimme!