Title: I'm Your Fella, Cinderella!
Author: Andariel666
Chapter: Four
POV: Tyrael
It seemed that my days were getting no better. I had had no memorable run-ins with the March Warden aside from one unfortunate incident when I opened a door and the corner hit him in the face. He had an oddly-shaped bruise in the middle of his forehead for days after that one.
My duties as servant to Prince Legolas were actually duller than the kitchens – his heart wasn't in it, I could tell, and I would rather have stood wrenching the feathers from a duck's derriere than be the fall-back because he hadn't ensnared his desired slave before Haldir.
I had had few proper run-ins with the Lady Kalia herself – and when I could not tease or mock in person, I would merely grin at her in a way that made her surely paranoid. This, in turn, made her seem to become twitchy, which in turn, made Haldir paranoid.
It was so very fun to watch that I made it a sport – one that I was already the champion of.
I had not spoken to Haldir since I had given his, erm, package a good deal of pain during the handshake-gone-wrong. Though, I did see him at the festivities after that little incident, and he seemed to be limping a bit. And then, of course, I had shaken him up something awful at the feast. You can always rely on an Elf's ears to do the job.
I was walking through the gardens, staring disdainfully at the girly flowers and remembering my foster-parent, Layadwen, sticking the flowers in my hair and saying I looked 'pretty'. As soon as I had been old enough to feel that I deserved to speak my mind, I requested to no longer look 'pretty' and instead flung myself into hand-to-hand combat, training with an Elf named Orevon, who was later killed in a battle when he was outnumbered by Orcs.
As I was walking through the gardens, a basket of fresh laundry for Legolas resting on my hip, I spotted Kalia herself, looking at Elrond's prized garden, looking somewhat pleased with herself.
I grinned slowly. I found teasing her enormously satisfying – and I did it at any interval. Perhaps it was slight jealousy at her time spent with the March Warden, whose presence was very welcome and whose presence I had avoided as much as possible, seeing as whenever I was near him I seemed to hurt him in some way. So how could I resist this marvellous opportunity? I skipped up to her brazenly, keeping a stupid grin on my face.
I had seen her and Haldir together on many occasions, and the sight often made me want to throw them both in the Loudwater and watch them get swept away in the currents. But even I could not fall through on such a plan – I merely settled for the odd attack on Haldir. I would pelt plum stones at the back of his head at regular intervals, and although hiding from him took quite a lot (for he would hunt vigilantly and expertly for hours if he was in the mood); I greatly enjoyed my little games.
She jumped, sighting me, before glaring at me darkly. "Oh, it is you again."
"Anyone would think you did not miss me," I said, feigning hurt, and put a hand over my heart, before frowning at the dirt smudges on it and wiping it on my dress.
"Oh, how could I not miss you? I find that I prefer that you annoy me than annoy Le – someone else, at least." Kalia would have had steam coming from her ears if she were to be any angrier, and I grinned at her quick change of words. It was very amusing to see her face turn red, as she knew she had made a mistake, and she knew I would pick up on it.
"Worry not, dear Kalia," I drawled. "I doubt the prince finds me annoying." She blushed. "And how is dear Haldir, might I ask? Does he still have endowments that put baguettes to shame?"
Kalia's mouth opened wide, and I said, "Close your mouth, dearest, you might attract the flies."
The small Elf maiden gave me a furious look, before saying, "You are the most abominable wench this side of Rivendell."
I bowed. "I try my best, milady. Here." I flung a pair of Legolas's leggings at her. "A little souvenir, Kalia dear. The Prince sleeps naked, you know." I laughed at the stunned look on her face as she held the leggings. "I shall see you, mellonamin."
And with that I flounced off. I realised, with great annoyance, that as much as Legolas was very easy on the eyes, I found Haldir easy on practically everything. And his time spent with Kalia was, unfortunately, serving to fuel something I had not felt in decades – jealousy.
Jealousy was rearing its ugly head – and for a man, no less!
I growled to myself, right before I tripped over a log – in a flowerbed, oddly enough (which I had admittedly been walking through as a shortcut) and landed flat on it. I fell with a loud 'oof', the laundry going everywhere as I swung my arms out to break my fall – no matter though. Something else broke my fall.
"Who on earth would put such an obstacle in the gar – " I stopped short, wide-eyed. I was staring into the blue eyes of Haldir, as he lay on his back, looking wide-eyed at me. I was lying on top of him. And my strange fall had caused a pair of Legolas's leggings to rest on my head.
"Well, my lady, this is unexpected," he said smoothly, pulling the leggings off my head. "They do not suit you."
I suddenly realised that the baguette I had been speaking of only moments before was right under me. I swung myself to sit up, and hit my head on a low tree branch behind me. I glared at the March Warden as he began to laugh and said, "What kind of Elf lies on his back in the middle of a flowerbed?!"
"What kind of servant disregards property and trounces through flowerbeds?" He retorted, and he crossed his arms, looking rather amused, as he laughed still, looking rather handsome and all the more attractive. Damn the Elf for being so attractive.
I glared at him. "Excuse me, Haldir. I really must be delivering Legolas's leggings and tunics to him. He cannot remain naked all day, can he?"
Haldir's laughter died abruptly, and he gave me a somewhat astonished look. I frowned, gathering Legolas's garments together once more, and then blushed when I realised I was still sitting astride the March Warden, and he seemed to be getting comfortable.
"Does something amuse you?" I asked, seeing the small grin on his face.
"Aye," he said, nodding.
"Well, I suggest you keep it to yourself," I said, frowning, feeling a bad mood arising. "I have work to do."
I started to stand, but he caught my wrist. I looked down, and noticed that his icy mask was on his face – the icy mask that was legendary and a renowned trait of Lothlórien's March Warden.
"You have a knack for speaking out of place, Tyrael. Not to mention your disrespectful attitude towards serious situations which could be taken as offences." Haldir's voice was silky and dangerous, and though it made me shudder with the normal hormonal reactions, I also felt a lick of fear run up my spine.
"'Twas an accident, heruamin my lord," I said as evenly as I could. "I am unaccustomed to shaking hands – especially those of high ranking Elves such as yourself." The last part had been said mockingly, and as soon as I said it, I realised that I had spoken out of place yet again. If I was not careful, I could be thrown out on my derriere, jobless, foodless – homeless. And alcohol-less. I sighed and said, "What do you ask of me?" The words felt like poison in my mouth, for I had never spoken to anyone as though I were defeated. However, as idiotic as I may have acted a lot of the time, I knew that I would prefer some level of civility and self-control over being homeless and cold.
A slow smile curved his lips, and I realised with distaste that that offer had been anything but savoury to not only my mind, but also the mind of the March Warden, who seemed quite adept at seeing the sexual side of most double-edged comments. "I merely desire an apology, Tyrael," he replied, his voice lilting with obvious amusement. "After all, I know that that alone will be very hard for you, seeing as you are used to getting away with your mistakes."
I glared, and realised that I was pouting in a rather childish way. He wished for me to apologise? He was right – I very rarely apologised to anyone, unless I really had to. I might hint at apologies, but never properly speak one – and Haldir was requesting just that. I bit my lip, for once wishing that my tongue weren't so harsh and my hand not so uncoordinated and strong. I mumbled the apology, my cheeks flaming.
"I beg your pardon? I did not hear you," he said, looking innocent enough. I growled to myself quietly. He had Elven ears! He must have heard it! Nay, he was playing with me, damn him!
"I am sorry, my lord," I bit out, my voice louder. "'Twas an accident, but I should have apologised, because…" I sneered to myself at the distaste of my next words, "Because it was the right thing to do. I suppose that is also in regards to…the feast…and the door…" I decided not to mention the plum stones.
He watched me with a slight smile. "That was not so bad, was it?"
"Nay. It was worse." I stood sharply, and gathered Legolas's clothing, still fuming.
"Do not try me, Tyrael," Haldir sighed, standing as well.
"Try you?" I looked at him with all the innocence I could muster.
"Your behaviour is unacceptable. Should you continue…"
"Forgive me my lord, but I do believe that should I need to be punished, it is the Prince of Mirkwood's place to do so. I am, after all, his servant." I clenched my jaw, the basket now back at my hip. I flicked some of my hair from my eyes, trying not to reveal my anger. I suddenly felt pity for Kalia – how she must loathe serving such a – a – an arrogant pig!
As I walked past him I said over my shoulder, "Kalia is just past the white rose bushes. I am sure she is dying for your company."
I sneered bitterly to myself and made my exit as fast as possible – ducking into a private door hidden by curtains of ivy that crept up the wall. I need a drink, I thought. A strong one.
Will Tyrael get her stiff one? *Snickers* Sorry, couldn't resist. Will Suzie and Andariel get a review??? Click down below to find out!