September 5th - Am very, very glad that today is Saturday, and do not have to face students or colleagues or, indeed, leave quarters at all.
Can only feel that some of the less pleasant events in my life, such as joining Death Eaters, leaving Death Eaters, and returning to Death Eaters as Spy, were mere doddle compared with potential trauma of being seen in this condition.
Should very much like to blame Hermione but am only too aware that decision was entirely my own. After all, she was quite right to recommend strange product known as Toothpaste; it is clearly superior to Mrs Krest's All-Purpose Caries Corrector, with added benefit that it does not stain teeth unfortunate shade of yellow.
Am therefore easily swayed by her argument that Shampoo will be far superior to Coal Tar Potion of own brewing, which has been successful for many years in controlling rampant Dandruff but less than effective in terms of Cleanliness.
Retire to Shower with bottle and follow instructions carefully.
(Query - Why rinse and repeat? Surely if product is to be effective, it will be so on first application?)
(Answer - Comes there none, but reflect that if one repeat is desirable, two will be more so, and act on this idea without delay.)
Am also baffled by product name, as seems clear that Shampoo is for application only to Head and not , as name would seem to imply, Shoulders. Remainder of stay in Bathroom is dominated by ponderings on mysterious ways of Muggles.
On returning to Bedroom, Hermione becomes Busy with Brush, Comb, and strange gusts of Hot Air from wand, and I become inexplicably keen to see Results. Dear Hermione, oddly, is less than enthusiastic about this and, on my attempting to pass her in order to view self in Mirror, becomes very nearly violent.
Reason for this becomes clear when she tackles me to the floor and I look up to catch sight of myself in Mirror; which remarks, drily, that Conditioner might be a good idea Next Time.
Am forced to admit that Mirror may be Right.
In the extremely unlikely event of there being a Next Time.