"Look Before You Leap!"
Disclaimer: Same old, same old. Don't even bother why I do this anymore. If you recognize anything from the show, he/she/it doesn't belong to me. It's the property of Disney. Anything not from the show is mine.
J. Gander Hooter sat in his plush chair and faced his Chief Agent. "Agent Gryzlikoff, I've been feeling very strained lately. I've been considering a vacation for a while, but I thought my duties here at SHUSH were far too important to abandon. But that...incident yesterday changed my mind."
"I was telling Dr. Bellum to keep the power on that contraction low," answered Gryzlikoff sheepishly.
"I'll be heading to Pato Alto on the very next flight," Hooter began. "For a week, I want you to--"
"Take your place, Director?"
"No. I've already called the Anatidaeopolis Division. They're sending a temp. She should be here soon."
There was a puff of blue smoke. "I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am the extra six hours that the earth takes to revolve around the sun! I am --"
Gryzlikoff coughed on the smoke. "Is against SHUSH regulations to pollute air."
Darkwing, unfazed, leaned on the desk. "What can I do for you, J. Gander?"
The Director of SHUSH got out of his seat and grabbed a suitcase. "I'll be embarking on my first vacation in fifteen years--"
"And you want me to make things don't get hairy in your absence, right? Yes, you can always count on Darkwing Duck to topple the transgressors, foil FOWL--"
"Actually, I need you and Gryzlikoff to mind the office until our temp gets here. She'll arrive in a couple of minutes. Try not to kill each other until she does. Please."
Outside, a taxi blew its horn.
The Director saluted. "See you in a week!"
The SHUSH agent and the superhero waited until he was gone, then Darkwing leaped toward the chair and sat down.
Gryzlikoff looked horrified. "You can't sit there! Against--"
"I'm not even an official agent. You can't tell me what to do. Besides, Gryzlikoff, you'll probably sit in this chair someday. You've thought about it--"
The agent shook his head. "No, no!"
"Come off it, Vladimir. You haven't lived your entire life by what a stupid rulebook says," teased Darkwing. He stood up. "If you sit in this chair when you're not supposed to for one minute, nobody will ever know. I won't tell if you won't."
Gryzlikoff let out a deep sigh. "It does look comfy." He sat down. "Wow. I can feel the power seeping out!" He frowned. "Either that or my fountain pen is leaking." He leaped up.
"So, Gryzzie, have you ever had to deal with a temp?"
"Not in a while." The bear grinned. "But I've never met one I couldn't whip."
"SNAP TO, TWITS!" came a booming voice. "I'M ELSIE WHIPHAM!"
Gryzlikoff cringed. "Help."
Elsie Whipham entered the office. "Nice cape," she commented to Darkwing. The female duck was about half Gryzlikoff's height. Her face, presumably appearing older than she really was, was divided into stern, sharp planes. Whipham had short black hair in a pageboy, and a green suit completed her ensemble.
Darkwing glanced at his wristwatch. "I've got to skiddaddle."
"You cannot leave me here!" protested Gryzlikoff.
*********************************************************************************************************
Morgana McCawber hummed the words to 'So Many Ways' as she admired her reflection in the hall mirror. "I think that's enough mummy dust."
The doorbell rang. The sorceress ran toward the door and opened it.
A tall rooster, proud red comb standing high, clad in a tuxedo was on the doorstep. "Miss McCawber--"
Morgana grimaced. "Steelbeak."
"In the feathers," the FOWL agent smirked. "Ya know, dose wanted posters in Europe did not do you justice--"
"I suspect you're here for more than just flattery," the witch answered angrily.
"Ooh, you've still got it." Steelbeak pulled a bouquet of roses from behind his back. "You were once da Duchess of Deception. I admired you before FOWL's slight name change. When I was still livin' in Venice."
Morgana wrinkled her beak. "But yesterday's gone."
"Today remembers. Let me cut to da chase, ex-Madame Du Mischief. FOWL's got a new scheme, and we need someone with your expertise on magic--"
"Is that a threat? I've got a link with my boyfriend. He'll be here in less than five seconds!"
"No need to call 'im. I won't hurt ya. Just making an offer. Name your price."
"Forget it, Iron Jaw."
"Nice jab. Did you think of that one yourself or did your boyfriend think it up?" Steelbeak shook his head. "I've got one question for you, Morgana. Why? Why did you give up all that fame and glory for Darkwing Dolt?"
The sorceress gritted her teeth. "That's none of your business, but if you must know, he's twice the bird you and your colleagues will ever be. You ever cross my threshold again, and Darkwing will have your tailfeathers nailed to the wall!" Morgana slammed the door, smiling a little at the metal crunch.
Steelbeak rubbed his dented metal prosthetic. "I'll just go to Plan B." He eagerly left McCawber Manor.
Morgana was about to apply her lipstick when the doorbell rang again. She opened it. "Oh, hello, Medeva."
Medeva, Morgana's younger sister, touched the air. Sparks flew. "What happened? Get into another argument with your boyfriend?"
"No. An uninvited guest paid a call." Morgana glared at the mirror. "What are you doing here?"
"Daddy's on the warpath. Kicked me out of the castle."
"What did you do this time?"
The young duck tried to smile innocently. She was slim as her sister and shared the green eyes and raven hair, but was about half Morgana's height. "Me?"
"Out with it, Madelyn Evangeline McCawber."
"All right," snapped Medeva. "He caught me eating a cheeseburger from McDuckles, okay?" She hated being addressed by her real name, a fact her relatives knew too well.
"You know that drives Daddy up a wall."
"Well, who's dating a Normal?" Medeva snickered. "I would have paid a million bucks to be there. Too bad I was studying in England when it happened."
"It's your fault for getting expelled from Eldritch."
"So, how's your boyfriend?"
"Fine. Wondering if he's going to be when he gets here."
"I think you're being too hard on him."
"Pardon?"
"You complain about him not liking your food, you say he can't get used to you. I don't think he's ever dated a sorceress before. Have you ever tried his food? They say the House of Love is built on the foundation of compromise."
"Med, you know what day it is?"
"February 28. Why?"
"And if you were paying attention in astrology--"
"I took astronomy. And yeah, the earth orbits around the sun in three-hundred-sixty-five and a fourth days. Every four years, the fractions are combined to produce February 29. The Leap Year. And your point is?"
Morgana smiled. "Normals sometimes like to take new leaps on Leap Day. So I'll give it a shot."
"What are you going to do, Morg?"
Morgana stared at her mirror. "If Dark can't make my world his, I'll make his mine."
"What are you suggesting?"
The older sorceress stared into the mirror and chanted a simple phrase: "For one night to day, the choice is mine, relinquish thine knowledge of the occult, may fate and normalcy intertwine."
There was a blinding flash of blue-white light. The mirror seemed to melt, the silver dripping onto the floor. Then, as quickly as it had appeared, it vanished.
Morgana's appearance was unchanged. She held out her fingers and shook them. No magic energy came out. "It worked!"
Medeva's jaw dropped. "Morgana! You're not--"
"I'm now normal."
"Are you crazy?!"
"It's only for twenty-four hours."
"But have you ever lived a day without using magic?"
"Not that I can remember, but there's a first time for everything." Morgana reached into her beehive and began to pull several hair pins out. The hair, finally affected by gravity, fell in cascading waves around her shoulders.
Medeva stared at her sister. "It's your choice. Dad's gonna go goofy when he hears about this!"
"You won't tell on me, will you?"
"What will you give me if I don't?"
"I'll give you a big punch in the beak if you DO!"
"All right. I won't tell Daddy." If there's anything Medeva didn't want to be on the receiving end of, it was her sister's right hook. "Though, if you're gonna go with the simple look, I'd recommend something like this." She used her own magic touch to transform Morgana's tight red gown into a black skirt and red blouse. The skirt was tea-length, revealing Morgana's rarely-seen legs. On her feet were black flats, decorated with red bows.
"Not bad, Medeva." The doorbell rang a third time. Morgana opened it. "Dark, darling!"
"Ready for our night out?" asked Darkwing. "Say, you seem different."
"My new wardrobe?"
"Besides that. Something glaringly different. I just can't put my finger on it..." The two lovers left and boarded the Ratcatcher, heading for the Tower.
Medeva was left sulking on the couch. "I hate it when I outsmart myself."
Disclaimer: Same old, same old. Don't even bother why I do this anymore. If you recognize anything from the show, he/she/it doesn't belong to me. It's the property of Disney. Anything not from the show is mine.
J. Gander Hooter sat in his plush chair and faced his Chief Agent. "Agent Gryzlikoff, I've been feeling very strained lately. I've been considering a vacation for a while, but I thought my duties here at SHUSH were far too important to abandon. But that...incident yesterday changed my mind."
"I was telling Dr. Bellum to keep the power on that contraction low," answered Gryzlikoff sheepishly.
"I'll be heading to Pato Alto on the very next flight," Hooter began. "For a week, I want you to--"
"Take your place, Director?"
"No. I've already called the Anatidaeopolis Division. They're sending a temp. She should be here soon."
There was a puff of blue smoke. "I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am the extra six hours that the earth takes to revolve around the sun! I am --"
Gryzlikoff coughed on the smoke. "Is against SHUSH regulations to pollute air."
Darkwing, unfazed, leaned on the desk. "What can I do for you, J. Gander?"
The Director of SHUSH got out of his seat and grabbed a suitcase. "I'll be embarking on my first vacation in fifteen years--"
"And you want me to make things don't get hairy in your absence, right? Yes, you can always count on Darkwing Duck to topple the transgressors, foil FOWL--"
"Actually, I need you and Gryzlikoff to mind the office until our temp gets here. She'll arrive in a couple of minutes. Try not to kill each other until she does. Please."
Outside, a taxi blew its horn.
The Director saluted. "See you in a week!"
The SHUSH agent and the superhero waited until he was gone, then Darkwing leaped toward the chair and sat down.
Gryzlikoff looked horrified. "You can't sit there! Against--"
"I'm not even an official agent. You can't tell me what to do. Besides, Gryzlikoff, you'll probably sit in this chair someday. You've thought about it--"
The agent shook his head. "No, no!"
"Come off it, Vladimir. You haven't lived your entire life by what a stupid rulebook says," teased Darkwing. He stood up. "If you sit in this chair when you're not supposed to for one minute, nobody will ever know. I won't tell if you won't."
Gryzlikoff let out a deep sigh. "It does look comfy." He sat down. "Wow. I can feel the power seeping out!" He frowned. "Either that or my fountain pen is leaking." He leaped up.
"So, Gryzzie, have you ever had to deal with a temp?"
"Not in a while." The bear grinned. "But I've never met one I couldn't whip."
"SNAP TO, TWITS!" came a booming voice. "I'M ELSIE WHIPHAM!"
Gryzlikoff cringed. "Help."
Elsie Whipham entered the office. "Nice cape," she commented to Darkwing. The female duck was about half Gryzlikoff's height. Her face, presumably appearing older than she really was, was divided into stern, sharp planes. Whipham had short black hair in a pageboy, and a green suit completed her ensemble.
Darkwing glanced at his wristwatch. "I've got to skiddaddle."
"You cannot leave me here!" protested Gryzlikoff.
*********************************************************************************************************
Morgana McCawber hummed the words to 'So Many Ways' as she admired her reflection in the hall mirror. "I think that's enough mummy dust."
The doorbell rang. The sorceress ran toward the door and opened it.
A tall rooster, proud red comb standing high, clad in a tuxedo was on the doorstep. "Miss McCawber--"
Morgana grimaced. "Steelbeak."
"In the feathers," the FOWL agent smirked. "Ya know, dose wanted posters in Europe did not do you justice--"
"I suspect you're here for more than just flattery," the witch answered angrily.
"Ooh, you've still got it." Steelbeak pulled a bouquet of roses from behind his back. "You were once da Duchess of Deception. I admired you before FOWL's slight name change. When I was still livin' in Venice."
Morgana wrinkled her beak. "But yesterday's gone."
"Today remembers. Let me cut to da chase, ex-Madame Du Mischief. FOWL's got a new scheme, and we need someone with your expertise on magic--"
"Is that a threat? I've got a link with my boyfriend. He'll be here in less than five seconds!"
"No need to call 'im. I won't hurt ya. Just making an offer. Name your price."
"Forget it, Iron Jaw."
"Nice jab. Did you think of that one yourself or did your boyfriend think it up?" Steelbeak shook his head. "I've got one question for you, Morgana. Why? Why did you give up all that fame and glory for Darkwing Dolt?"
The sorceress gritted her teeth. "That's none of your business, but if you must know, he's twice the bird you and your colleagues will ever be. You ever cross my threshold again, and Darkwing will have your tailfeathers nailed to the wall!" Morgana slammed the door, smiling a little at the metal crunch.
Steelbeak rubbed his dented metal prosthetic. "I'll just go to Plan B." He eagerly left McCawber Manor.
Morgana was about to apply her lipstick when the doorbell rang again. She opened it. "Oh, hello, Medeva."
Medeva, Morgana's younger sister, touched the air. Sparks flew. "What happened? Get into another argument with your boyfriend?"
"No. An uninvited guest paid a call." Morgana glared at the mirror. "What are you doing here?"
"Daddy's on the warpath. Kicked me out of the castle."
"What did you do this time?"
The young duck tried to smile innocently. She was slim as her sister and shared the green eyes and raven hair, but was about half Morgana's height. "Me?"
"Out with it, Madelyn Evangeline McCawber."
"All right," snapped Medeva. "He caught me eating a cheeseburger from McDuckles, okay?" She hated being addressed by her real name, a fact her relatives knew too well.
"You know that drives Daddy up a wall."
"Well, who's dating a Normal?" Medeva snickered. "I would have paid a million bucks to be there. Too bad I was studying in England when it happened."
"It's your fault for getting expelled from Eldritch."
"So, how's your boyfriend?"
"Fine. Wondering if he's going to be when he gets here."
"I think you're being too hard on him."
"Pardon?"
"You complain about him not liking your food, you say he can't get used to you. I don't think he's ever dated a sorceress before. Have you ever tried his food? They say the House of Love is built on the foundation of compromise."
"Med, you know what day it is?"
"February 28. Why?"
"And if you were paying attention in astrology--"
"I took astronomy. And yeah, the earth orbits around the sun in three-hundred-sixty-five and a fourth days. Every four years, the fractions are combined to produce February 29. The Leap Year. And your point is?"
Morgana smiled. "Normals sometimes like to take new leaps on Leap Day. So I'll give it a shot."
"What are you going to do, Morg?"
Morgana stared at her mirror. "If Dark can't make my world his, I'll make his mine."
"What are you suggesting?"
The older sorceress stared into the mirror and chanted a simple phrase: "For one night to day, the choice is mine, relinquish thine knowledge of the occult, may fate and normalcy intertwine."
There was a blinding flash of blue-white light. The mirror seemed to melt, the silver dripping onto the floor. Then, as quickly as it had appeared, it vanished.
Morgana's appearance was unchanged. She held out her fingers and shook them. No magic energy came out. "It worked!"
Medeva's jaw dropped. "Morgana! You're not--"
"I'm now normal."
"Are you crazy?!"
"It's only for twenty-four hours."
"But have you ever lived a day without using magic?"
"Not that I can remember, but there's a first time for everything." Morgana reached into her beehive and began to pull several hair pins out. The hair, finally affected by gravity, fell in cascading waves around her shoulders.
Medeva stared at her sister. "It's your choice. Dad's gonna go goofy when he hears about this!"
"You won't tell on me, will you?"
"What will you give me if I don't?"
"I'll give you a big punch in the beak if you DO!"
"All right. I won't tell Daddy." If there's anything Medeva didn't want to be on the receiving end of, it was her sister's right hook. "Though, if you're gonna go with the simple look, I'd recommend something like this." She used her own magic touch to transform Morgana's tight red gown into a black skirt and red blouse. The skirt was tea-length, revealing Morgana's rarely-seen legs. On her feet were black flats, decorated with red bows.
"Not bad, Medeva." The doorbell rang a third time. Morgana opened it. "Dark, darling!"
"Ready for our night out?" asked Darkwing. "Say, you seem different."
"My new wardrobe?"
"Besides that. Something glaringly different. I just can't put my finger on it..." The two lovers left and boarded the Ratcatcher, heading for the Tower.
Medeva was left sulking on the couch. "I hate it when I outsmart myself."