Stupid fucking Kent State and their damned changing academic policies. I
think because I withdrew from biology this semester, I'm going to get an F
in it, though I withdrew before midterms or any real tests. So yeah. I'm
going in to High School science education, and here I am going to be taking
biology fucking ONE again for the third fucking time.
*ahem* Sorry. I'm quite bitter about this whole college issue. I'm also quite depressed because of it as well.
Anyway, have fun with someone that I haven't used ever.. Walter.
~*~*~*~*~
November 18
I do not remember the last time that I have seen Sir Harker weep as much as he has this entire day, and to my lord's delight, I did not ask what was troubling him or even pretend to notice that he had been crying, for he wanted to put forth the face of a man that was fully in control of all situations every time I delivered his tea or meals to his office, but his bloodshot eyes and moist sleeves were enough to tip him off. It is not my job to question my lords, but my job is to serve them, which I do with the utmost respect to their jobs, families, and lives.
It is not my place to judge my lords, but I do not feel that Sir Harker was ready to take control of the Hellsing Organization when his predecessor vacated the office. He is still much of a child, terrified of what will happen if he fails his family, honor, and country, and must be led by his second wife in order to complete the tasks at hand.
Sir Integral would consider me a traitor for saying what I truly feel about Lillith, but if not for that woman, Hellsing would be nonexistent today. She is the cornerstone that holds the foundation of the Organization together, and it is why she travels to London, Brussels, and Amsterdam while I remain in the mansion in Haarlem with the leader in name. It is her doing that we only police three nations instead of the entire of the Continent in the blasted treaty with the Vatican, and it is per her wishes that only Devries lead the Hellsing Organization when the eldest daughter is ready. She knows that her child Anika would be the equivalent to her husband in the office, and understands that it is for Hellsing's best interest that one just like Sir Integral take command to rule over the men with an iron fist and iron will. Pity that she is not of Hellsing blood, for I would elect her to the office of leader of Hellsing instantly if it were my choice.
Do not get me wrong, Sir Harker is not truly incompetent, it is just that he does not wish to work alone ever. Though Hellsing is strong, Sir Harker wishes for the reassurance that working alongside the Vatican and other organizations bring. He has good intentions for his troops and organization, but lacks with his follow up to the missions. I tried to teach him this concept when he was my pupil years ago, but try as he may, Sir Harker could never work alone on any project, no matter how simple or mundane. Sir Integral's father truly did make the right choice in choosing his daughter over his nephew as his heir, as Hellsing would have been in ruins if Sir Harker had to take over when he was eleven years old. The Vatican would have eradicated us in no time.
I do also enjoy seeing this truce with the Vatican and the rest of the world's vampire hunting groups, for we always have fought for a common goal, so why should we be adversaries? Granted, we should keep to our own territory, but it is reassuring to know that if a vampire escapes our lands another association will be able to help hunt and kill the beast instead of the other associations mocking the failure of the one, but not doing anything to fix the problem themselves either.
Perhaps it is Sir Harker that needs to go on holiday, not his wife or daughters. He is almost forty, his hair is almost entirely grey, and his hands tremble as he speaks to everyone if he is not holding on to something for stability. It is truly a shame to have watched the downfall of this once handsome young man to the pitiful creature he is today.
When I am double his age and still in almost as perfect condition as I was when I worked among the troops of Hellsing, and he is half dead, it just saddens me.
I was also surprised to see Lieutenant Victoria here in Haarlem without Alucard or Argetni, but she said that those two are planning on spiriting Devries away to London for her school holiday. I wanted to warn Miss Victoria about the dangers that she has left our little master in, but Seras refused to listen to my words of warning, heading away from me and looking quite disgusted with herself.
The only other time that I saw Miss Victoria today was when she came to ask if I had any blood packets available for her lunch, which I did, and she quickly left the kitchen after her meal was in her possession.
I would write to Argetni or Alucard about this matter, but they would not heed my words of advice about the girl. They are far too arrogant in believing that they are better than us mortals, and dear Argetni has always believed herself superior to all even when she was mortal.
I pray Devries is strong enough to come out of her training with the vampires alive, and I pray that she will be ready to take over for her father sooner than she expects.
The Servant Always,
Walter
*ahem* Sorry. I'm quite bitter about this whole college issue. I'm also quite depressed because of it as well.
Anyway, have fun with someone that I haven't used ever.. Walter.
~*~*~*~*~
November 18
I do not remember the last time that I have seen Sir Harker weep as much as he has this entire day, and to my lord's delight, I did not ask what was troubling him or even pretend to notice that he had been crying, for he wanted to put forth the face of a man that was fully in control of all situations every time I delivered his tea or meals to his office, but his bloodshot eyes and moist sleeves were enough to tip him off. It is not my job to question my lords, but my job is to serve them, which I do with the utmost respect to their jobs, families, and lives.
It is not my place to judge my lords, but I do not feel that Sir Harker was ready to take control of the Hellsing Organization when his predecessor vacated the office. He is still much of a child, terrified of what will happen if he fails his family, honor, and country, and must be led by his second wife in order to complete the tasks at hand.
Sir Integral would consider me a traitor for saying what I truly feel about Lillith, but if not for that woman, Hellsing would be nonexistent today. She is the cornerstone that holds the foundation of the Organization together, and it is why she travels to London, Brussels, and Amsterdam while I remain in the mansion in Haarlem with the leader in name. It is her doing that we only police three nations instead of the entire of the Continent in the blasted treaty with the Vatican, and it is per her wishes that only Devries lead the Hellsing Organization when the eldest daughter is ready. She knows that her child Anika would be the equivalent to her husband in the office, and understands that it is for Hellsing's best interest that one just like Sir Integral take command to rule over the men with an iron fist and iron will. Pity that she is not of Hellsing blood, for I would elect her to the office of leader of Hellsing instantly if it were my choice.
Do not get me wrong, Sir Harker is not truly incompetent, it is just that he does not wish to work alone ever. Though Hellsing is strong, Sir Harker wishes for the reassurance that working alongside the Vatican and other organizations bring. He has good intentions for his troops and organization, but lacks with his follow up to the missions. I tried to teach him this concept when he was my pupil years ago, but try as he may, Sir Harker could never work alone on any project, no matter how simple or mundane. Sir Integral's father truly did make the right choice in choosing his daughter over his nephew as his heir, as Hellsing would have been in ruins if Sir Harker had to take over when he was eleven years old. The Vatican would have eradicated us in no time.
I do also enjoy seeing this truce with the Vatican and the rest of the world's vampire hunting groups, for we always have fought for a common goal, so why should we be adversaries? Granted, we should keep to our own territory, but it is reassuring to know that if a vampire escapes our lands another association will be able to help hunt and kill the beast instead of the other associations mocking the failure of the one, but not doing anything to fix the problem themselves either.
Perhaps it is Sir Harker that needs to go on holiday, not his wife or daughters. He is almost forty, his hair is almost entirely grey, and his hands tremble as he speaks to everyone if he is not holding on to something for stability. It is truly a shame to have watched the downfall of this once handsome young man to the pitiful creature he is today.
When I am double his age and still in almost as perfect condition as I was when I worked among the troops of Hellsing, and he is half dead, it just saddens me.
I was also surprised to see Lieutenant Victoria here in Haarlem without Alucard or Argetni, but she said that those two are planning on spiriting Devries away to London for her school holiday. I wanted to warn Miss Victoria about the dangers that she has left our little master in, but Seras refused to listen to my words of warning, heading away from me and looking quite disgusted with herself.
The only other time that I saw Miss Victoria today was when she came to ask if I had any blood packets available for her lunch, which I did, and she quickly left the kitchen after her meal was in her possession.
I would write to Argetni or Alucard about this matter, but they would not heed my words of advice about the girl. They are far too arrogant in believing that they are better than us mortals, and dear Argetni has always believed herself superior to all even when she was mortal.
I pray Devries is strong enough to come out of her training with the vampires alive, and I pray that she will be ready to take over for her father sooner than she expects.
The Servant Always,
Walter