So I've heard that the last chapter sounded forced. Oh well. If I quit this
fic, I won't come back to it, that's just how I work, and well, I don't
think anyone would really care to see how Devries and company work
everything out anymore.
For the reviewer who's name I can't remember *sighs at own stupidity* I want to thank you for the kind words ^_^ It's been too long since someone had something nice to say about my writing, and I'm glad you're enjoying this thing. ^_^
I'll be trying to make it flow better, though I can't find in the rereads through 17 as to where it feels forced. . . . .just a thoughtful, disconnected Alucard.
I dunno. I finally got Hellsing back from my friend, and I do believe I'm totally screwing the characters over now that I've seen it in the entirety for the first time since May.
*sighs* I think my muse died.
~*~*~*~*~
November 25
God damn that infernal child of the unholy union of two first cousins, as her selfish and irrational attempt for freedom has left me with quite a dilemma as to how I will restore her good name and her faith in everything that should be her life! It is Devries' duty to take command of the Hellsing Organization as all her relatives have before her as well as to carry on the most honorable bloodline of the family.
This is Harker's fault for not telling my daughter the truth of her origins and why she has been granted with the abilities that she possesses. He was always the stupidest man in the family, even more dimwitted than his father Richard. To think that dropping such a bomb on Hellsing child that was groomed from birth to loathe the undead and all their wicked ways would not affect her? God, what did he expect from Devries! She did exactly what I would have done, as would my father before me, and his father before him! She got away from the world of the night because of her tainted blood.
If she had grown up knowing about me and accepting the fact that her mother was turned in order to preserve her own life, maybe it would have been better for her spirit. The story could have still been the same, that I died in childbirth, but I could have asked Alucard to change me then. Who would have questioned my authority or my word?
Now Devries had bolted, and her dolt of a sister has asked us to train her. Thank God for the winter holiday that will be upon us in a few weeks time, as then the three vampires can go search for the little master without having to ask many questions.
I don't know what to do with this Anika situation. I am certain that Devries can be convinced to return to her position and title, but until then Anika will be asking to be trained.
As was proven with both Richard and Harker, it is dangerous to train the second in line for the throne too early, as they become traitorous and deceitful in their boredom. Yet it is not Harker that I need to influence so the girl will be taken out of training and put back in to a regular classroom, it is Lillith.
Lillith van Hellsing is nothing like what I had expected Harker to want after having me in his life. Though she was passive and jovial in her tenure as a secretary in the Organization, this little woman has stepped up to become much like I was as a human, allowing Harker to run Hellsing in name, while she does everything else. It is truly a pity that it is not Lillith who is of the blood, as she would make an excellent Knight and commander.
Just as I fought for Devries to be named the only blood heir and true successor to Integral Hellsing, securing my daughter a spot in the history of our great family, Lillith is trying to do the same with her halfbreed daughter, wishing to start a new legacy with Anika. For just as Imke van Hellsing, the wife of my ancestor Abram is considered the matron of my line, and Wilhelmina Harker is the matron of Devries' father's line, Lillith Edwards would become the founder of the new generation of Hellsing leaders, creating a new sort of royalty in the most honorable house built on blood and honor.
I refuse to allow this to happen.
In my waking moments, I have spent most of my time mentally scanning the continent and as far as my mind will travel in to other lands for Devries' whereabouts. I know she headed toward Asia, but I lost her mental pattern around Moscow. She could be about anywhere now, but I am most certain that Devries would run to America to gain anonyminity and a clean start in her new life.
Alucard refuses to help me outright, but he does realize the dilemma of our situation. Without Devries, Hellsing will fall apart and then start hunting its own undead, and though he finds it amusing that our men would try to kill him, he does not wish to fight a mortal opponent, so he gave his word that he would help find Devries in his own manner.
Alas, I am not going to be able to hunt for my daughter because of a meeting within the next night with both Lillith and Harker. I am not looking forward to such an event, but perhaps I can convince my former husband to take Anika out of all formal Hellsing Organization training routines until it is determined that Devries is not able to do her duty to the family, Organization, and country.
Then again, Harker is so easily influenced that making him think as I do will be a quite simple task. He has never said no to my gaze, so why would he stop now?
I am actually looking forward to seeing my replacements again.
Argetni
For the reviewer who's name I can't remember *sighs at own stupidity* I want to thank you for the kind words ^_^ It's been too long since someone had something nice to say about my writing, and I'm glad you're enjoying this thing. ^_^
I'll be trying to make it flow better, though I can't find in the rereads through 17 as to where it feels forced. . . . .just a thoughtful, disconnected Alucard.
I dunno. I finally got Hellsing back from my friend, and I do believe I'm totally screwing the characters over now that I've seen it in the entirety for the first time since May.
*sighs* I think my muse died.
~*~*~*~*~
November 25
God damn that infernal child of the unholy union of two first cousins, as her selfish and irrational attempt for freedom has left me with quite a dilemma as to how I will restore her good name and her faith in everything that should be her life! It is Devries' duty to take command of the Hellsing Organization as all her relatives have before her as well as to carry on the most honorable bloodline of the family.
This is Harker's fault for not telling my daughter the truth of her origins and why she has been granted with the abilities that she possesses. He was always the stupidest man in the family, even more dimwitted than his father Richard. To think that dropping such a bomb on Hellsing child that was groomed from birth to loathe the undead and all their wicked ways would not affect her? God, what did he expect from Devries! She did exactly what I would have done, as would my father before me, and his father before him! She got away from the world of the night because of her tainted blood.
If she had grown up knowing about me and accepting the fact that her mother was turned in order to preserve her own life, maybe it would have been better for her spirit. The story could have still been the same, that I died in childbirth, but I could have asked Alucard to change me then. Who would have questioned my authority or my word?
Now Devries had bolted, and her dolt of a sister has asked us to train her. Thank God for the winter holiday that will be upon us in a few weeks time, as then the three vampires can go search for the little master without having to ask many questions.
I don't know what to do with this Anika situation. I am certain that Devries can be convinced to return to her position and title, but until then Anika will be asking to be trained.
As was proven with both Richard and Harker, it is dangerous to train the second in line for the throne too early, as they become traitorous and deceitful in their boredom. Yet it is not Harker that I need to influence so the girl will be taken out of training and put back in to a regular classroom, it is Lillith.
Lillith van Hellsing is nothing like what I had expected Harker to want after having me in his life. Though she was passive and jovial in her tenure as a secretary in the Organization, this little woman has stepped up to become much like I was as a human, allowing Harker to run Hellsing in name, while she does everything else. It is truly a pity that it is not Lillith who is of the blood, as she would make an excellent Knight and commander.
Just as I fought for Devries to be named the only blood heir and true successor to Integral Hellsing, securing my daughter a spot in the history of our great family, Lillith is trying to do the same with her halfbreed daughter, wishing to start a new legacy with Anika. For just as Imke van Hellsing, the wife of my ancestor Abram is considered the matron of my line, and Wilhelmina Harker is the matron of Devries' father's line, Lillith Edwards would become the founder of the new generation of Hellsing leaders, creating a new sort of royalty in the most honorable house built on blood and honor.
I refuse to allow this to happen.
In my waking moments, I have spent most of my time mentally scanning the continent and as far as my mind will travel in to other lands for Devries' whereabouts. I know she headed toward Asia, but I lost her mental pattern around Moscow. She could be about anywhere now, but I am most certain that Devries would run to America to gain anonyminity and a clean start in her new life.
Alucard refuses to help me outright, but he does realize the dilemma of our situation. Without Devries, Hellsing will fall apart and then start hunting its own undead, and though he finds it amusing that our men would try to kill him, he does not wish to fight a mortal opponent, so he gave his word that he would help find Devries in his own manner.
Alas, I am not going to be able to hunt for my daughter because of a meeting within the next night with both Lillith and Harker. I am not looking forward to such an event, but perhaps I can convince my former husband to take Anika out of all formal Hellsing Organization training routines until it is determined that Devries is not able to do her duty to the family, Organization, and country.
Then again, Harker is so easily influenced that making him think as I do will be a quite simple task. He has never said no to my gaze, so why would he stop now?
I am actually looking forward to seeing my replacements again.
Argetni