Author: Darlaranger
Story Title: Love Changes Us
Chapter Title: Cut Her Loose
Summary: Someone finally finds out, but not from the one he's supposed to.
Disclaimer: I own nothing, literally. I now have about 52 bucks in my savings account but if CBS and Bruckheimer really want it they can have it. As long as Butterflied turns out to be as awesome as it's sounding. However, if they do take my cash, they'll have to live with the fact that no one will be getting any Christmas presents this year.
Spoilers: As I plan to ignore pretty much everything that actually goes on during the episodes, I'd say you're pretty much safe here. I'll warn people if that changes.
And, on with the show:
"Oh my God," Sara gasps, "Oh my God."
She quickly turns, her hand pressed tight against her mouth. She runs out of the bathroom grabbing an empty evidence bag on the way. She makes it to the living room before she begins to throw up. With the bag held close to her mouth and the sounds of retching filling the air, she doesn't even hear Brass move behind her and ask her if she's all right. He moves her outside and sits her down on the porch, yelling at a young officer to grab a bottle of water from the squad. Finally, Sara's stomach stops its violent revolt and she sits weeping, on the porch.
With a grimace, Brass takes the bag from her and gives it to the patrol officer, "Here, take this. Dispose of it... somewhere. Just not anywhere where it'll get mixed up with the real evidence."
That said, he sits down on the porch next to Sara and offers her a tissue he's pulled from his pocket. "Careful, I might've already blown my nose in that one."
When his comment doesn't get a response from Sara, aside from the sniffling she's already doing, he puts his hand on her shoulder.
"Are you okay Sara?"
"No, um, do you think you could have one of your officers take me back to the lab? I'm not feeling too well; I think I need to go home."
Brass' face wrinkles with concern, "Are you sure? This'd be a first, Sara Sidle wanting to leave a crime scene early."
"Yeah, I'm sure. I'm not up to working the scene now; I almost lost control there in the house and contaminated an entire room full of evidence."
"Sure Sara, no problem. I'll take you myself." He stands up and then reaches a hand down to give her a lift up. They walk slowly over to a squad car and get in. A minute later, they pull out of the driveway and head off, back to the lab.
Inside the bathroom, Catherine is having a hard time keeping her stomach down as well. Kids always get to her. Right now, if she had her choice, she'd be at home with Lindsey, just looking at her innocent face, making sure that she was okay and that she was still the beautiful, life-filled child she had sent off to school this morning. Instead, she gets Grissom—a sweaty-faced, panting Grissom.
"So much for wishful thinking," she mutters under her breath.
"What...?" Grissom wheezes.
"Nothing."
"What've you got?" he said, moving in closer for a look.
"Gil Grissom, meet the late Mrs. Carmichael, and her young son. Sara found him when she pulled back the curtain."
Grissom looks up at Sara's name. "Where is Sara?"
"You didn't see her on your way in?"
"No...should I have?" he asks, confused.
"After she found the body, she ran out of here looking like she was going to lose her breakfast. I figured you'd have seen her in the hallway or something."
But Grissom doesn't hear anything after the words lose her breakfast. "She contaminated evidence? That's just great, wonderful, perfect. Now, if we manage to catch whoever did this, there's a good chance that the case'll get tossed out. Couldn't she have managed to hold it in for a few seconds?"
He turns and begins to leave in search of her, but Catherine grabs his sleeve. "For God's sake, Sara Sidle doesn't contaminate evidence. She'd give up her badge before allowing that to happen. You know that, Gil."
"I don't know anything anymore. The way she's been acting for past few days, I'm not sure if she's even Sara anymore. When we started this thing, this ... relationship, it was good. Now she's hiding things, I know she is. She's not telling me everything, she's not happy. I think she's getting ready to leave me." His fists clench into tight little balls and the line of his mouth is set hard against the thought.
Catherine sputters for a moment, "No, no, Gil, she's not leaving you. Trust me, she's..."
Grissom looks at his friend and says, in all seriousness, "I know she's not going to leave me. Because I'm not going to give her the chance. I'm going to let her go first, so she doesn't have to feel guilty about moving on. I want her to be happy, Catherine. She was talking about kids this morning, and I could feel that deep down, no matter what she said to the contrary, that she wanted them. I can't give her children Catherine. She deserves to be with someone who can, and I'm going to make sure that she has the opportunity."
She grabbed at his arm, afraid that he would leave right now to do what he was saying.
"Gil. You can't, you can't do this. Trust me. Go home, talk to her, but don't push her away. You can't push her away." Catherine pleads with him, a tear visible in the corner of her eye. If only these people would get a clue!
"Why? Why, Catherine? I knew when we started this that eventually she'd move on, that she'd need more than I could give. I just never thought that day would come so soon. I can't keep her close to me when I know that it's killing her inside, every time she looks at me lately there're tears in her eyes. So, tell me Catherine, why shouldn't I cut her loose?"
"God! You know, for being the most intelligent people I know, you and Sara are idiots when it comes to each other. You can't push her away because she's PREGNANT, you twit. Because she's pregnant with your child and too terrified to tell you, too terrified about how you'll react."
Grissom's eyes are wide; his clenched fists are slowly opening. He's barely breathing. When he finally speaks, his voice is high, and wavering, "Pregnant? My Sara?"