Meminerunt
Omnia Amantes
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone of these lovely characters. My ideas are based
on a completely different book and I just borrow it. So shot me. Literally.
Seven times, please!
Argus
Filch
Argus Filch was a cruel, mean, child-hating man on the outside. Yet he was a
nice, caring, child-loving man on the inside. But no one knew about that side
because Argus kept it inside.
And like Severus Snape, Argus didn't mind keeping his true feelings on the inside.
That's because all he really needed was to get laid. And so did Snape, but he
is a different story. That was another problem for Argus. He couldn't find any
other person who would or could love him. For Argus Filch is gay.
He had to live through his horrible life without a companion. That is, until
Harry Potters second year at Hogwarts. The year that the Chamber of Secrets was
opened and closed. The year that Gilderoy Lockhart come to school to teach. The
same year that Argus Filch opened up his heart to a man who would never remember
him.
Gilderoy Lockhart was a very 'blonde' man. He was conceited, stuck up, frilly,
fluffy man. Many men are like this, but Gilderoy was different. He was, and
most likely still is, gay. And his was in dire need of getting laid.
It was the fourth month of the term and Argus had just finished cleaning up mud
along three corridors. He was dead tired and in need of a bath. So, Argus
stomped his way through the dank corridors to the dungeons. Along the way, he
met up with some Slytherin scum, as he so nicely put it, which were having fun
playing with a wig. Upon closer inspection, after frightening the scum away, he
found that the wig belonged to Gilderoy Lockhart.
Now, Argus Filch was not a man who would take the wig. No, he would return. But
Argus didn't want to return the wig, not because he wanted the wig but because
he was afraid of being dragged into a conversation with Gilderoy. It wasn't
that the man wasn't entertaining; it was that Argus had to choose his words
carefully. If he didn't, Argus might let slip that he secretly harbored a crush
for the ditzy man. And if anyone new that well lets just say Argus would have
to open up his heart.
After a few frustrating minutes, Argus finally decided that he would give the
wig back. But it had to be right then or he would never find the courage to
give it back. Besides, the wig was still warm and probably from Gilderoy's
golden head, too. Argus started off; going over any words he could or could not
us in a conversation. And all too soon, did he find himself in front of
Gilderoy's room. Knocking on the door, Argus decided that he would not stay but
instead say he had children to catch wandering around the halls. Then he would
rush off, saying he had heard something.
When no one answered, Argus knocked louder. "Come in!" Argus froze,
hearing that angelic voice was like heaven to him. He steadied his shacking
hand and turned the knob. The door opened and he walked in, attentively. The
study was done up with pictures of the man of Argus' dreams, all of which were
smiling at him. Let's just say that was making him rather pleased. Argus didn't
see anyone and walked to one of the doors. He opened it and immediately shut it
again.
On the
other side of that door was a man. In a tub. And that man was Gidleroy Lockhart.
Argus' breath was coming in raged gaps and he was having a hard time not
fainting. His body started to shake when he heard those two sexy words.
"Come in." Gidleroy was inviting him, Argus Filch, into his own bathroom.
Secretly hoping to be asked into the bath with Gilderoy, Argus opened the door.
Before him lay a bathtub the size of a swimming pool. And in the deep blue
water lay a golden haired man by the name if Gilderoy. Smiling, Gilderoy
motioned for Argus to come into the bath. Argus just started back, so shocked
he wasn't even breathing. After Gilderoy's smile faded slightly, Argus snapped
out of his trance.
"I'm sorry, Gilderoy. I was just so shocked." At the hurt look on
Gilderoy's face, Argus decided that now was a good time to tell him about the
crush. "Well, ah you see, Gilderoy. I- I'm kinda into you and I have
been wanting you to do this for so long and-"
Gilderoy
held up a hand to silence Argus. "Its okay, Argus. I've been working up my
courage to do the same thing for quite some time. So, are you going to
join me?"
The two men made love long into the night and confessed their dying love for
each other. No one ever new about their steady relationship. Not even Albus
Dumbledore, who knows everything that goes on in Hogwarts.
But when Gilderoy went down into the Chamber of Secrets, Argus thought he was a
hero. Who gives a rat's ass about Potter, anyway? But when Gilderoy emerged
from the chamber, he didn't remember anything. Not his name, his job, spells,
potions, or worst of all, his love. He didn't remember the numerous nights he
spent with Argus Filch. He didn't remember his undying love for him.
And so, Argus Filch closed up his heart to everyone once again. Though, he does
go visit Gilderoy Lockhart every few years. But he still can't get over his
loss and the damage Gidleroy did to himself.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Author's Note: I now I'm a bit crazy to be
writing a Filch/Lockhart story but I was surfing through the romance section in
FF and saw that no one or hardly anyone wrote an AF/GL story! Besides, I have
lost my crackers. Just visit my LJ! Um… thank you for the reviews and this is
one of my stupidest stories, so please don't judge my writing by this.