The Words I Could Never Say
AN~ It's amazing how one thing can cause a whole chain of reactions in life. This is demonstrated for one thing Inuyasha does, or doesn't do changes everything. There is also an ALTERNATE story for this which will be posted as chapter two later on. Note that THIS is the actual story, there's just a different version of it because I feel like making one =) For people who may happen to read my other fic "The Legend Of YuGiOh And The Spiritual Stones" don't worry, I WILL
finish it... eventually. Please leave a review whether you liked this or not, constructive critism are the most welcome, compliments welcome, but if you leave a flame, I'll insult it so much you'll regret ever coming here. Got that? Good ^_^ NOTE: This fic is in Kagome view, yet it's not in first person. Get it? If not read it and you'll see. On with the fic!
Disclaimer: Inu-Yasha and all of its characters strictly belong to Rumiko Takahashi. I do however own this fanfiction.
The Words I Could Never Say
Kagome walked home from school, it was a relief that it was finally over, she was so tired it felt like she floated through her classes than anything. She stifled a yawn as she crossed the street, not noticing how close that car was to hitting her.
'I've got to quit j-walking...' she sleepily thought, and absent mindedly j-walked again. A driver in a car angrily honked the horn at her, but she payed no attention and continued down the sidewalk home. Pretty soon, her tired eyes caught sight of the Higurashi Shrine. She quite happily tottered up the walkway and into the shrine.
She yawned and then called out, "I'm home!" Expecting the usual greeting from her mom in the kitchen and Souta running up, and her grandpa running up to her to make sure no evil spirits were hovering over her, but recieved none. Confused, she walked in the kitchen. "Mom?" She noticed a note taped hastily on the refridgerator, and she ripped it off.
'Kagome,
Me, grandpa, and Souta are going to be out for a few hours, we need to go to the next city to pick up his medicine. We shouldn't be too long. I left you a snack in the fridge.'
Kagome shrugged, and accepted the food from inside the refridgerator. As she slowly ate the noodles, she was thinking about how Inuyasha loved noodles. She jumped when she felt a sharp poke, and a voice say,
"Let me have some." Well speak of the devil. Kagome took one last swallow, and handed Inuyasha the bowl of noodles. He then happily slurped up the noodles very quickly. He then handed her the empty bowl and ran off.
"Hey don't just eat and run!" She snapped. She stomped back to her room to find Inuyasha in his classic position, on his side with his hand propping up his head.
"You coming back now?" Kagome sighed. Things never changed, did they?
"No, I'm not Inuyasha. I'm so behind my pile of homework is probably bigger than the Tetsusaiga when it's transformed. So could you please go so I can get to work?" In truth she wanted him to stay, but she knew she'd never be able to concentrate he did.
"Feh. I'm staying right here until you return." He pointed down at her bed to emphasise her point.
"Fine. But if you don't let me work, I might have to use the word." She threatened. Inuyasha involuntarily shuddered at the thought, but pretended he wouldn't care even if she did it right then and there. Kagome looked at the massive pile, and couldn't bring herself to work on it. What was the use? Even if she pulled a miracle and finished it all, she'd just fall behind like this all over again. Then she'd finish that work and it'd happen again, and again, and again...
Kagome let out a huge sigh, and pushed up from her desk and stood up. Inuyasha didn't notice until several minutes after she left the room, since he was too busy fighting a losing battle within himself.
'Just tell her, stupid!'
'But then she'd know.'
'Uh yeah, that's the point!'
'What if she doesn't feel the same about me? I don't think I can take that kind of rejection... Besides, she thinks I'm head over heels over Kikyo...'
'Well then change what she thinks!'
'It's not that simple...' He was quite right, especially seeing as he had hard time opening up and showing his feelings. The rare times he did show a tiny bit of affection she'd just shove him away, literally. He remembered with a wince the incident that happened just before Kikyo was ressurected. When a big portion of their problems started. It was true, Inuyasha no longer loved Kikyo, but he wanted her to rest in peace and avenge her death, and he'd keep trying for that until she could accept her death, and when Naraku was dead. Then he'd try and find happiness himself.
And to prevent any awkwardness, he'd keep his feelings for Kagome a secret until his mission was complete. A desicion he'd soon regret for the rest of his life.
~*A Few Hours Later*~
Kagome's family still hadn't returned, and Kagome was restless. She decided to go on a walk while waiting for their return. Walks always helped her think, and let time pass rapidly. So she put on her shoes and grabbed her coat and walked out the door calling over her shoulder,
"Inuyasha, watch the shrine for me will you?" A snort was his reply, and she walked out the door and shut it firmly behind her, taking that snort as a yes. She later found out that he was following her in the trees the whole way.
After a while, Kagome had troubling thoughts about Inuyasha, Kikyo, and Naraku. Why couldn't Kikyo just rest in peace and leave her and Inuyasha be? Why couldn't Inuyasha let Kikyo go? She's been dead for fifty years, anyway. And why did Naraku have such a big grudge against Inuyasha and Kikyo? She thought about how she loved Inuyasha, and wishing to herself that he would feel the same way about her. But up against Kikyo, Kagome didn't stand a snowball's chance in hell. Or so she thought. She was so busy thinking of these things, she didn't even notice the car coming, until it swerved out of the way, the tires screaming in anguish, until the car slammed into the side of a building.
Kagome gasped in shock. She caused this... her. Kagome. Those poor people would've been just fine if only she had payed attention to where she was going. She slowly walked over to the strangely familiar car, and wrenched open one of the car doors, her common sense out the window.
She screamed.
Inuyasha clamped his hands over his ears, wondering what she'd just seen. He moved closer until he could see inside of the car, and was too shocked to move.
"Mom! Souta! Grandpa!" Kagome sobbed. They had died on impact. But then she heard a small rustle of movement. "Mom?" Kagome whispered, her face stained with tears.
"K...Kagome... thank... goodness you're s...safe..."
"Mom! We have to get you to a hospital!"
"Have a long life, Kagome... and be... careful of cars..." Her eyes were stony, as she struggled to speak to Kagome, it hurt so much. She took one long shuddery gasp of air, her eyes staring off into space "Oh my-" and her breathing halted. Her eyes slowly shut, dying from being squeezed to death underneath her car seat.
"Mom... Souta... Grandpa..." Her tears were pouring from her eyes like small waterfalls. Kagome suddenly jumped up and ran away sobbing, earning several stares from passerbys, and sympathetic looks from those who witnessed the crash.
Inuyasha unfortunately missed her departure, as he was sitting against the trunk of tree he was sitting up on, shaking on the branch he was sitting on. The sight of Kagome's family dead reminded him of his mom's death and he was too upset to move. His breath coming in short shuddering gasps, his eyes looking out into oblivion, shocked. He was scared, not about his memories, but for Kagome. How would she take it? And how could someone like Kagome witness something so horrible, and would she blame herself for the death of her family? Inuyasha looked back at the wreck of the car, which was now surrounded by fire fighters, and the paramedics. But Kagome was nowhere in sight. He was jolted awake, and looked around for her panicking. Where could she have gone?
Inuyasha finally managed to calm himself down. He was half demon, he could trace her scent. He jumped down from his branch to the ground scaring a few kids, and frantically sniffed the air. His worry, and the dozens of people around the car and blood made it hard for him to pick out her scent, but he found it, and dashed off following it.
~*~
Kagome ran away crossing several streets and roads. Her face was in her hands and she was sobbing. Only one coherent thought in her head was 'Dead.' She wasn't paying attention to where she was going at all, it was a miracle she didn't run into anything or get hit by a car. She couldn't believe her whole family were dead because she wasn't paying attention to the road. She already felt horrible before she saw who was in the car, but it was her family! She should've died there with them, but no she had to survive it and watch her mom die. The sight of them all crushed under their seats, bodies limp and blood all around flashed through her head once again which only made her sob more hysterically.
'I want to die too...' She thought darkly, 'I should've died with them, and I don't want to be alone...' She'd totally forgotten Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango, and Shippo and her other friends she was so upset. 'Damn you sun, it should be storming... I'll never forgive myself for this...'
And then it happened. Truck tires sreeched along with her scream.
"KAGOME!"
~*~
Kagome blinked, feeling sore all over. She was vaguely aware of being held in someone's arms. Very strong arms... Kagome struggled to look up but barely could because of the pain. She was able to see sad golden eyes looking into her eyes filled with concern, sadness and something else...?
"Inu...yasha?"
"Shh, I'm here Kagome." He whispered softly.
"What, happened?" Kagome winced as another stab of pain hit her.
"A... thing... hit you, I wasn't quick enough to save you." He pointed over, and Kagome looked seeing a truck, and shuddered, that's why she was in so much pain.
"Inuyasha... It's all my fault."
"What is?" He asked her gently.
"My family, I killed them, it's all my fault."
"No it's not Kagome, it's not your fault, you understand? There was no way you could've prevented that car crash."
Kagome was starting to find it hard to breathe. "Yes it is! If I was paying attention..." Kagome winced some more, and her vision was very slowly turning black. She knew what was coming. "Inuyasha, moments ago I didn't care about myself anymore... In fact I wanted to die... I'm scared, don't let me die."
He held her closer against him. "It'll be okay, you'll make it through this." Inuyasha wasn't sure if he was assuring her or himself.
Kagome's breath came in shallower and she could hear paramedics running around trying to get Inuyasha to let her go.
"Sir, you have to let her go..." One of them told him gently.
"NO! I won't let her go!" Inuyasha cried out, holding her tighter against him.
"Let her go." The man said more harshly, as he thought there might be something they could do to save her.
"No!" Kagome's breathing came in faster, and her eyes were starting to look glazed.
"I love you Inuyasha..." Kagome whispered so quietly, Inuyasha barely heard her. She could see her family standing around her smiling at her gently. Her hand weakly reached out to them, "Mom...?" Kagome's breathing halted, her hand fell limp and her eyes closed for the last time. She died never hearing the three words she wanted to hear more than anything, without ever learning her family's death wasn't her fault. Without her being to live and enjoy life to its fullest, never completed the Shikon Jewel, and never got a shot at her dreams.
"I love you too, Kagome..." Inuyasha whispered, and for the first time in his life, he cried.
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~Fin~
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Inspirations: An Inu-Yasha fanart, and the song Predilection.
Please review.
AN~ It's amazing how one thing can cause a whole chain of reactions in life. This is demonstrated for one thing Inuyasha does, or doesn't do changes everything. There is also an ALTERNATE story for this which will be posted as chapter two later on. Note that THIS is the actual story, there's just a different version of it because I feel like making one =) For people who may happen to read my other fic "The Legend Of YuGiOh And The Spiritual Stones" don't worry, I WILL
finish it... eventually. Please leave a review whether you liked this or not, constructive critism are the most welcome, compliments welcome, but if you leave a flame, I'll insult it so much you'll regret ever coming here. Got that? Good ^_^ NOTE: This fic is in Kagome view, yet it's not in first person. Get it? If not read it and you'll see. On with the fic!
Disclaimer: Inu-Yasha and all of its characters strictly belong to Rumiko Takahashi. I do however own this fanfiction.
The Words I Could Never Say
Kagome walked home from school, it was a relief that it was finally over, she was so tired it felt like she floated through her classes than anything. She stifled a yawn as she crossed the street, not noticing how close that car was to hitting her.
'I've got to quit j-walking...' she sleepily thought, and absent mindedly j-walked again. A driver in a car angrily honked the horn at her, but she payed no attention and continued down the sidewalk home. Pretty soon, her tired eyes caught sight of the Higurashi Shrine. She quite happily tottered up the walkway and into the shrine.
She yawned and then called out, "I'm home!" Expecting the usual greeting from her mom in the kitchen and Souta running up, and her grandpa running up to her to make sure no evil spirits were hovering over her, but recieved none. Confused, she walked in the kitchen. "Mom?" She noticed a note taped hastily on the refridgerator, and she ripped it off.
'Kagome,
Me, grandpa, and Souta are going to be out for a few hours, we need to go to the next city to pick up his medicine. We shouldn't be too long. I left you a snack in the fridge.'
Kagome shrugged, and accepted the food from inside the refridgerator. As she slowly ate the noodles, she was thinking about how Inuyasha loved noodles. She jumped when she felt a sharp poke, and a voice say,
"Let me have some." Well speak of the devil. Kagome took one last swallow, and handed Inuyasha the bowl of noodles. He then happily slurped up the noodles very quickly. He then handed her the empty bowl and ran off.
"Hey don't just eat and run!" She snapped. She stomped back to her room to find Inuyasha in his classic position, on his side with his hand propping up his head.
"You coming back now?" Kagome sighed. Things never changed, did they?
"No, I'm not Inuyasha. I'm so behind my pile of homework is probably bigger than the Tetsusaiga when it's transformed. So could you please go so I can get to work?" In truth she wanted him to stay, but she knew she'd never be able to concentrate he did.
"Feh. I'm staying right here until you return." He pointed down at her bed to emphasise her point.
"Fine. But if you don't let me work, I might have to use the word." She threatened. Inuyasha involuntarily shuddered at the thought, but pretended he wouldn't care even if she did it right then and there. Kagome looked at the massive pile, and couldn't bring herself to work on it. What was the use? Even if she pulled a miracle and finished it all, she'd just fall behind like this all over again. Then she'd finish that work and it'd happen again, and again, and again...
Kagome let out a huge sigh, and pushed up from her desk and stood up. Inuyasha didn't notice until several minutes after she left the room, since he was too busy fighting a losing battle within himself.
'Just tell her, stupid!'
'But then she'd know.'
'Uh yeah, that's the point!'
'What if she doesn't feel the same about me? I don't think I can take that kind of rejection... Besides, she thinks I'm head over heels over Kikyo...'
'Well then change what she thinks!'
'It's not that simple...' He was quite right, especially seeing as he had hard time opening up and showing his feelings. The rare times he did show a tiny bit of affection she'd just shove him away, literally. He remembered with a wince the incident that happened just before Kikyo was ressurected. When a big portion of their problems started. It was true, Inuyasha no longer loved Kikyo, but he wanted her to rest in peace and avenge her death, and he'd keep trying for that until she could accept her death, and when Naraku was dead. Then he'd try and find happiness himself.
And to prevent any awkwardness, he'd keep his feelings for Kagome a secret until his mission was complete. A desicion he'd soon regret for the rest of his life.
~*A Few Hours Later*~
Kagome's family still hadn't returned, and Kagome was restless. She decided to go on a walk while waiting for their return. Walks always helped her think, and let time pass rapidly. So she put on her shoes and grabbed her coat and walked out the door calling over her shoulder,
"Inuyasha, watch the shrine for me will you?" A snort was his reply, and she walked out the door and shut it firmly behind her, taking that snort as a yes. She later found out that he was following her in the trees the whole way.
After a while, Kagome had troubling thoughts about Inuyasha, Kikyo, and Naraku. Why couldn't Kikyo just rest in peace and leave her and Inuyasha be? Why couldn't Inuyasha let Kikyo go? She's been dead for fifty years, anyway. And why did Naraku have such a big grudge against Inuyasha and Kikyo? She thought about how she loved Inuyasha, and wishing to herself that he would feel the same way about her. But up against Kikyo, Kagome didn't stand a snowball's chance in hell. Or so she thought. She was so busy thinking of these things, she didn't even notice the car coming, until it swerved out of the way, the tires screaming in anguish, until the car slammed into the side of a building.
Kagome gasped in shock. She caused this... her. Kagome. Those poor people would've been just fine if only she had payed attention to where she was going. She slowly walked over to the strangely familiar car, and wrenched open one of the car doors, her common sense out the window.
She screamed.
Inuyasha clamped his hands over his ears, wondering what she'd just seen. He moved closer until he could see inside of the car, and was too shocked to move.
"Mom! Souta! Grandpa!" Kagome sobbed. They had died on impact. But then she heard a small rustle of movement. "Mom?" Kagome whispered, her face stained with tears.
"K...Kagome... thank... goodness you're s...safe..."
"Mom! We have to get you to a hospital!"
"Have a long life, Kagome... and be... careful of cars..." Her eyes were stony, as she struggled to speak to Kagome, it hurt so much. She took one long shuddery gasp of air, her eyes staring off into space "Oh my-" and her breathing halted. Her eyes slowly shut, dying from being squeezed to death underneath her car seat.
"Mom... Souta... Grandpa..." Her tears were pouring from her eyes like small waterfalls. Kagome suddenly jumped up and ran away sobbing, earning several stares from passerbys, and sympathetic looks from those who witnessed the crash.
Inuyasha unfortunately missed her departure, as he was sitting against the trunk of tree he was sitting up on, shaking on the branch he was sitting on. The sight of Kagome's family dead reminded him of his mom's death and he was too upset to move. His breath coming in short shuddering gasps, his eyes looking out into oblivion, shocked. He was scared, not about his memories, but for Kagome. How would she take it? And how could someone like Kagome witness something so horrible, and would she blame herself for the death of her family? Inuyasha looked back at the wreck of the car, which was now surrounded by fire fighters, and the paramedics. But Kagome was nowhere in sight. He was jolted awake, and looked around for her panicking. Where could she have gone?
Inuyasha finally managed to calm himself down. He was half demon, he could trace her scent. He jumped down from his branch to the ground scaring a few kids, and frantically sniffed the air. His worry, and the dozens of people around the car and blood made it hard for him to pick out her scent, but he found it, and dashed off following it.
~*~
Kagome ran away crossing several streets and roads. Her face was in her hands and she was sobbing. Only one coherent thought in her head was 'Dead.' She wasn't paying attention to where she was going at all, it was a miracle she didn't run into anything or get hit by a car. She couldn't believe her whole family were dead because she wasn't paying attention to the road. She already felt horrible before she saw who was in the car, but it was her family! She should've died there with them, but no she had to survive it and watch her mom die. The sight of them all crushed under their seats, bodies limp and blood all around flashed through her head once again which only made her sob more hysterically.
'I want to die too...' She thought darkly, 'I should've died with them, and I don't want to be alone...' She'd totally forgotten Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango, and Shippo and her other friends she was so upset. 'Damn you sun, it should be storming... I'll never forgive myself for this...'
And then it happened. Truck tires sreeched along with her scream.
"KAGOME!"
~*~
Kagome blinked, feeling sore all over. She was vaguely aware of being held in someone's arms. Very strong arms... Kagome struggled to look up but barely could because of the pain. She was able to see sad golden eyes looking into her eyes filled with concern, sadness and something else...?
"Inu...yasha?"
"Shh, I'm here Kagome." He whispered softly.
"What, happened?" Kagome winced as another stab of pain hit her.
"A... thing... hit you, I wasn't quick enough to save you." He pointed over, and Kagome looked seeing a truck, and shuddered, that's why she was in so much pain.
"Inuyasha... It's all my fault."
"What is?" He asked her gently.
"My family, I killed them, it's all my fault."
"No it's not Kagome, it's not your fault, you understand? There was no way you could've prevented that car crash."
Kagome was starting to find it hard to breathe. "Yes it is! If I was paying attention..." Kagome winced some more, and her vision was very slowly turning black. She knew what was coming. "Inuyasha, moments ago I didn't care about myself anymore... In fact I wanted to die... I'm scared, don't let me die."
He held her closer against him. "It'll be okay, you'll make it through this." Inuyasha wasn't sure if he was assuring her or himself.
Kagome's breath came in shallower and she could hear paramedics running around trying to get Inuyasha to let her go.
"Sir, you have to let her go..." One of them told him gently.
"NO! I won't let her go!" Inuyasha cried out, holding her tighter against him.
"Let her go." The man said more harshly, as he thought there might be something they could do to save her.
"No!" Kagome's breathing came in faster, and her eyes were starting to look glazed.
"I love you Inuyasha..." Kagome whispered so quietly, Inuyasha barely heard her. She could see her family standing around her smiling at her gently. Her hand weakly reached out to them, "Mom...?" Kagome's breathing halted, her hand fell limp and her eyes closed for the last time. She died never hearing the three words she wanted to hear more than anything, without ever learning her family's death wasn't her fault. Without her being to live and enjoy life to its fullest, never completed the Shikon Jewel, and never got a shot at her dreams.
"I love you too, Kagome..." Inuyasha whispered, and for the first time in his life, he cried.
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~Fin~
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Inspirations: An Inu-Yasha fanart, and the song Predilection.
Please review.