Duo's Instant Messanging Pranks
Author's Note: I wrote this for no other reason than to make a silly, nonsensical joke and in the process perhaps solicit a few laughs from readers.
Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to the television show "Gundam Wing" or the rights to the character of "Duo Maxwell". I do own the rights to any mentally invalid character created withing, however. Also, keep in mind that the opinions of Duo Maxwell do not necessarily mirror mine.
This story is rated R for strong language
Yes, I admit it. I despise all shitbricks out there who randomly IM me with the sole purpose of annoying the hell out of me. The just lay into me with their inane banterings like an escaped tsunami of elephant semen from the elephant insemination clinic. Yup. I hate them that much. So when the do make the mistake of filling my computer screen with weevil infested cow manure, I take the time to play on their infinite stupidity caused by years of mating within the same gene pool.
Duo vs. C0unter5trike6776
This first prank came to me one day when some guy named "l33t C0unter5trike6776" messaged me for some reason. It seemed this dumbfuck was a Counterstrike player so I decided to act just as much a fucking illiterate monkey as he was. These dumbasses will believe anything you tell them. This guy sort of reminded me of that asshole Heero. All the prick does now is play counterstrike.
l33t C0unter5trike6776: do u play counterstrike
Duo: wha? N0 i play QUAEK turb0!
l33t C0unter5trike6776: quake i play quake 2
Duo: n0! not quaek 2 quake turb0!
l33t C0unter5trike6776: wat quake turbo???
Duo: it gam were u play as a b1g rat and fire ur rapid fire cheez railgoon at evil c4T!11!
Duo: den u taek a big water cannon and douse the eval boss cat king cattius with water. cats hate watter hahahaha lololol rofl
l33t C0unter5trike6776: lol can i get this game?
Duo: ya jus go to dis websaet ya www.analsex.com has it its in a link at the bottom of the site.
l33t C0unter5trike6776: hay thats a porn site!
Duo: no its not I don now wat da hell u talking here try this sawt: www.footfetish.com
l33t C0unter5trike6776: okay. hay that's another weird site u homo give me the real site
Duo: okeay fine i give u real site right now www.gundamwingnude.com
l33t C0unter5trike6776: what the fuck is ur problem i just asked for that game???
Duo: well i don now y yoo cant find it u must bee st00pid or sompin.
l33t C0unter5trike6776: well ur a fag
Duo: hav u seen da new counterstrake movie?
l33t C0unter5trike6776: wat there is no counterstrike movie u idiot
Duo: Yeas der is i downloaded it on my superexcafabulisticexpialadocius T1000 line at 3675266565254365 megabits an hour.
l33t C0unter5trike6776: ur just fooling again u fag aren't u?
Duo: nono 4 serius its staring burt Reynolds and dat guy from happy daes dat waers dat jacket u no da 1.
l33t C0unter5trike6776: wat it about?
Duo: it about some evil guy named dr. kraken who steals the us superweapon called "operation wedgie" and threatens da world with it. So bort renalds teams up with dat guy in the jacket along with spider man and hulk an the green lantern to fire a gatorade ray to knockout 'operaten wedgey'!!
l33t C0unter5trike6776: were can i dl?
Duo: www.farmsex.com.
l33t C0unter5trike6776: dats it ur a fuckin liar u fag!!!!
Duo: i didn't lie u just 2 dumb 2 find link u st00pid u da fag0t
l33t C0unter5trike6776: fuck u i should kick ur ass but ur going on ignore hear that?
Duo: Hello, welcome to ICQ
l33t C0unter5trike6776: fuCk you fag!
Duo: JEEZAS LUVS U!!!!!111!!