Duo Vs. Internet Fetishist #26728:

The Furry

I know, I know, it's been a while since I've updated, but this Duo has something called a "life" you know. Yes, a life which consists mainly of whacking off to tentacle hentai and stealing garbage bags and Coleman lanterns from the local K-Mart. And if you're going to whine about it, feel free to shove an apple down your throat whole kicking yourself in the ass repeatedly.

Anyway, this one time I was going to pillage my local K-Mart and I noticed something in the adjacent parking lot. There was a sign that proclaimed it was a "Furry Convention". Now, the first thing I thought was "What the fuck? A furry convention?" Then I saw that hogfuck Wufei dressed up in what looked to be a wolf costume or something. So I went over there to see what the hell he was doing. The first thing he said was "I'm a wolf." I knew what my duty was then. I went to K-Mart and stole a jumbo pack of Christmas lights, then kicked Wufei in the balls several times. I then proceeded to punch a whole through his lungs and string his furry ass off the nearest telephone pole I could find.

The point is is that furries are a sick, sick aberration to the human species. If you were born human, then you stay human. You shouldn't be going around like a fucking shitnugget proclaiming you're a "wolf" or a "fox" with the magical powers to fly or shape-shift or fart magical sleeping gas or some other dumbshit thing like that. If anyone of you sick fucks ever comes up to me with that shit I'll rearrange your face with a tennis racket.

Anyhow, the only thing worse than a furry is a "vore furry", who gets off on the idea of being an animal who is consumed alive by another animal. Frankly, I'd rather not masturbate to the idea of being eaten alive by a giant snake. But to each their sick twisted fucking own I guess. This shitloaf I talked to below subscribes to the "vore furry" lifestyle. Please allow me to vomit now.

Furry: HEY ASL???

Duo: Hello, welcome to ICQ!

Furry: ???

Duo: Oh sorry!

Furry: It's okay, what's up???

Duo: Oh, nothing. Just got back from the proctologist. Had to remove some blockage from my colon.

Furry: I see…

Duo: Yeah, I hate when they have to stick that camera all the way up there. Uncomfortable, you know what I mean?

Furry: Yeah…

Furry: Hey, do you like vore???

Duo: Yeah, I like gore! I once cut a guy to see his blood and guts and stuff. It was cool!

Furry: ???

Duo: Yo werd up my bizzitich!

Furry: Uh…yeah…anyway, are you a furry?

Duo: Yeah, I have plenty of fur on my ass if you know what I mean…

Furry: No! Do you like animal stuff.

Duo: Yeah, I sometimes like to dress up in skunk costume and have some bondage fun with my friends…spanking and cock sheathes could never get better!

Furry: Uh…cool…I myself prefer the wolf.

Duo: What the fuck you talking?! The skunk is way better! Wolves are a punch of pussy-ass bitches not fit to suck Heero's cock! Besides, I have a 15 inch dick!

Furry: Does the thought of being eaten alive turn you on?

Duo: By cannibals? Yeah man, I'd probably have the biggest fucking erection if cannibals started eating me!

Furry: No, I meant by other animals? Do you ever roleplay?

Duo: Yeah, I once tried roleplaying with some D&D group but they were more into lesbian orgies than anything.

Furry: What about vore situations?

Duo: Yeah, I thought being eaten by a giant ant would be cool.

Furry: Yeah, I've tried the turkey man thing before.

Duo: What the fuck is that?????????????

Furry: You know, when you get naked and someone dresses you up on a big platter. It's really erotic you should try it.

Duo: I would but someone might shove some foreign object up my ass! Like I said I just visited the proctologist! LOLOL!

Furry: ???

Duo: Ever tried being put in diapers?

Furry: What?

Duo: You know, someone putting you in a diaper and if you shit they'll clean it up and treat you like a baby?

Furry: That's sick shit, man….

Duo: I pity da foo who makes fun of mah diapers!

Furry: Whatever…

Duo: Want to see a good vore site?

Furry: Yeah

Duo: www.tubgirl.com

Furry: WTF!!!??? That's fucking sick you sick fag!

Duo: LOLOLZ pranked!

Duo: OMG WANNA FUCK SEXY!!?? ASL????????????

Furry: Fuck you you sick faggot fuck

Duo: Hello, welcome to ICQ!