Whole
I felt sweet kisses being planted down my feet, my toes, ankles, calves. I
felt my legs being gently opened by strong yet delicate hands. A tongue
lapped languidly on my inner thighs and went to my groins. Teeth bit and
then lips soothed... missing my cock completely. Next was my navel,
sucking, licking. My belly was also bitten then licked and kissed until it
was time for my nipples; tongue, lips, teeth, a bit of everything. Then up
to my neck. His body slowly relaxed and molded with mine, making me revel
on the weight of it. I sighed, giving me away, unable to pretend I didn't
care, I wasn't awake.
'Why don't you show you are as much of a nice guest as your friend down
there, who instantly stood up and greeted me?' He whispered, making sure to
brush his lips on my ear.
'Morning,' I said, wrapping my arms and legs around him.
'Morning, sleepyhead.'
He leaned on his elbow and propped up his head to meet my eyes. Practically
in slow motion, he approached my lips to torture me with an equally very,
very slow, deep, invasive yet soft and all the time sweet kiss. It didn't
take more than a few seconds, but it was enough to wake whatever part of me
that wasn't already up.
'Brian.' I moaned when he released my mouth.
'Say it again,' he whispered, sprinkling kisses all over my face.
'Brian.' My voice dropped to a quivering whisper.
'Again.'
His stubbles on my neck.
'Oh.'
He slapped my ass.
'Not that.'
'Brian.'
'That's better.' He kept on kissing me.
'Tell me you're going to fuck me.'
'I'm going to fuck you, Michael.'
He bit my collarbone.
'More!'
I shivered beneath him.
'I'm going to fuck your brains out.'
He traveled down my chest, brushing his chin along the way.
'More,' I pleaded.
'I'm going to fuck you so hard you're going to feel me up your throat.'
He was on my nipples by that time.
'More!' I cried out, bucking my hips to his.
'You'll be sore for a week!'
'More!'
'Two weeks?'
I looked at him, surprised by the doubtful, playful tone of his voice and
we both burst out laughing.
'Okay, enough with the talking. I'll show you. Judge for yourself, then.'
Two weeks it was. I winced every morning when I got out of bed, not to
mention some other times when I got to do certain movements. But let's not
fast forward to that point when the day brought so many interesting
revelations.
Thus, after we both crumbled on the bed, exhausted.
'God, Mikey, you wore me out!'
Awww, you liked that, didn't you? I fucking loved it! YAY!
'Really?' I asked in mock surprise, panting, but the smile of satisfaction
already spreading on my face.
'Just like I left you breathless.' He smirked.
Damn it, if that wasn't true!
'You did all right, Brian Kinney.'
'If all right makes for waking up the whole fucking neighborhood and
digging a hole in the wall with the headboard. Well, imagine when I give
you my masterpiece performance.'
What? You mean you can do better than that? Oh, Lord, whatever it was that
I did to deserve this, thank You so very much!
'Don't thank Him, thank me instead.'
Mind reader...
'I'm holding you on that one, Brian' I threatened him, shaking my finger in
his face, which he took into his mouth and gave it a brief but sexy
sucking...
'Have I ever let you down on a promise, Mikey?'
'No.'
He smiled, totally self-satisfied. Point proved.
'Now come over here.' I said. 'Give me some more of that kiss, I don't
think I got fully aquatinted with it yet.'
'Oh, you mean, this one?'
And he leaned to repeat that slow tongue-fucking-my-tonsils kiss. Yes, this
one, Brian. I guess I can say this is my favorite one, so far.
'Why did you stop?'
'Look down, Mikey. No, not my dick. At the floor.'
'Huh?'
'Look. At. The floor.'
I did.
'Oh. My. God. Brian! You brought me breakfast in bed!' Didn't I tell you he
was a romantic?
He rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically, trying hard to look annoyed.
'First off, I didn't bring YOU breakfast in bed; I brought US breakfast in
bed. And second of all, I only did that because I still don't have a decent
table to put you on top and fuck you into oblivion, spreading all possible
food on your body.'
'A table top fuck?'
'Yes, how do you like it?'
One of my fantasies!
'Sounds okay to me' I said nonchalantly.
'Good. Maybe we can try that some day,' he shot back.
Mental note: buy a fucking table, ASAP!!!!
'Sure, why not?' I said casually, reaching for the tray and placing it
between us.
Funny that on that tray there wasn't a single item that would have needed
to be drunk warmly, like coffee, for instance. That led me to think he had
planned the whole "wake up and fuck Mikey in the morning" while preparing
the tray. As usual, he had planned everything. What an evil man, whooo! I'm
going to like this; I'm so going to!
He picked a strawberry and after removing the green part, he held half of
it between his teeth, offering me the rest. Yet another delicious kiss.
You'd think by the time he'd fucked you his dick would be all you'd be
thinking about, however, his kisses. oh, his kisses.
'Shit! Got to open the store already.'
'What do you mean? You're not going anywhere near that front door, Michael!
I mean it!'
'But.'
'No 'but', except yours, of course.'
'Brian, I.'
'Call your uncle. And make that your only phone call until tomorrow, at
least. I don't want you within 10 feet away from me. Today you're all mine.
And that's final.'
Be still my heart, this is only the beginning, don't fall just now.
'Where's my cell phone?' I asked with a smile.
He smiled broadly. 'I'll get it to you.' And went after it. I sighed with
contentment. Ain't life just perfect? Here I am with the man of my dreams
and he's being everything and so much more than I'd expected.
He came back to bed with my phone and I called uncle Vic. Sure I had to lie
and tell him I was just tired and needed the day off. Well, that wasn't
really a lie. I was already tired and I sure as hell needed the day off...
with Brian. He bought it.
After more fruit, croissants, juices, jams, I thought it was time for a few
questions.
'Bri, have you had any interesting proposals?'
'I wouldn't say you've proposed to me, but that was the closest I got so
that makes yours the most inters-'
'Job proposal!'
'Oh, that? Hum, let me see. Yeah, a few.'
'But you're not working already.'
'No.'
'Have you at least decided on any?'
'Not quite.'
'Tell me! How were they?'
'Oh, there was the mayor.'
'What? The mayor? How... I don't get it.'
'I didn't tell you but before putting the adds on TV, I went to him and
offered what I had. The chicken turned it down, of course. He said it could
look as if he was trying some desperate last hour measure, the pussy! He
even questioned the authenticity of the facts. But then, when he saw the
ads.'
'He called you.'
'Not only did he call me but also he offered me a position as the manager
of all his campaigns as a mayor. He said he knew I was the Concerned
Citizens - how clever of him - and that I was a very brave young man, who
had done everything for the truth to come out. He then recognized my
appreciation for the truth - what he didn't when I was at his office
practically begging him to take the fucking tape!'
'But you didn't take his offer.'
'No.'
'It would have been a great opportunity, you know?'
'I know. But I'm tired of it, Mikey. I'm sick of all these politicians'
bullshit, and trying to please their egos and twisting a lie so that it
becomes half-truth and applying some pancake on it so that this way people
will buy it. I'm so fucking sick of it! I ended up fucking myself out of my
job, but I feel so much better now. I had to do it, Mikey, I just had to. I
couldn't live with myself like that anymore.'
I touched his face. He sighed and went on in a tired voice.
'Stockwell was the final straw but things started to wear out in my head
long before him. Being around him poisoned me more than I ever cared to
admit. There was a time I just couldn't stand that whole bullshit. That's
when the Gay and Lesbian Center fiasco came along. I gave him the idea and
he fell like a child. It was so easy. I just didn't count that he would
catch me with Justin.'
'I've never been prouder of you, even if I didn't tell you at that time, I
knew you had something to do with that.'
'Yeah, but then I knew I was already pushing my luck far too long. So I bit
the bullet and faced the consequences.' A heavy sigh escaped him. 'And at
what costs. They were high but they were worth every penny. I'm free now
and I won't go back to that cage ever again. I'm through with pretending
that I don't belong. I do belong, I want to belong. It's not because we're
a bit different from straight people that we're going to hide or settle for
less. And I won't ever again do any work for those I despise. Money is not
worth that much, I know that now. '
See? That's my Bri, that's why I fell for him some twenty years ago. It's
good to see him back. I took his face in my hands to kiss him once again.
'I know, Brian. You did right. I'll back you up, whatever your decision
is.'
'I knew you would, Mikey,' he said with only I was entitled to see; a look
where the real Brian Kinney would show, the one who did love.
'What about the other proposals?'
'Gardner.'
'No, get out of here!'
'Yes, he did try.'
'I can't believe this. What did he say?'
'Well, you know how powerful word of mouth can be. He got to know it was me
behind the ads and came to me, offering my partnership back.'
'And of course you didn't accept it.'
'Of course.'
'But not without some torture.'
'Yep. Torture is a plus.'
'What did you make him do?'
'I made him bend down on all fours and suck my dick.'
'WHAT??'
'I told him I'd only go back to Van Gard with at least a 50-50% deal.'
'He went ballistic.'
'He tried to hide it, but he was fuming. So after he uselessly tried to
dissuade me from those absurd thoughts' he said smiling 'he realized he had
to agree or else I wouldn't go back. He did that and I turned him down. But
not after a few days hanging, of course.'
'Of course.' I smiled back. 'You had some busy days while I was away.'
'Tell me about it. Days were okay, whereas nights...' He met my eyes with a
small, almost shy smile, trying to hide his pain.
I looked down at the croissant in my hand to avoid the blushing that was
trying hard to win its way up my face. And to think that was all for me,
his insecurities, his opened heart, even his shyness, as amazing as it can
be.
'I dreamt about you a lot those days.'
'Me too, Mikey.'
I looked up at him, surprised.
'I thought you were never coming back.'
'I thought it would take much longer than it took, actually. I still don't
understand how Hunter's mother dropped the charges like that, so out of the
blue. She was so determined... Oh, no! Brian, don't tell me... It was you!'
He feigned innocence. 'I don't know what you're talking about.' 'Oh, my God! It was you! Shit! Brian, what did you do?' 'I told you I don't know what you're talking about. And besides, what would I have done that could possibly make her give up? I'm not Rage, you know?' He said, casually putting some jam on his bread. 'Liar.' I teased him - he really hates being called that. He raised an eyebrow as a silent threat, widening those already big hazel eyes. 'Liar.' I repeated, more firmly this time, sustaining his gaze. 'Take it back.' 'No way!' He rested his bread on the tray. 'Take it back, Novotny.' 'You're lying, Kinney, and you know it,' I said smiling. He was SO not pleased. He took hold of my wrist in a flash, and twisted it wickedly. I was more surprised than hurt with that attitude. 'Ah! I... didn't know. you liked it rough, Kinney.' 'You have no idea how rough I like it. Are you taking it back?' 'Make me' I said in a mix of challenge and seduction. He kept the pressure on my wrist and pushed the tray aside, giving him enough room to pin me on the headboard. Within inches from my face, he kept on demanding me to take it back. I was almost intoxicated by his proximity; the idea of another searing kiss was giving me a hard time, literally, until I couldn't take it anymore and ravished his mouth. He fought back to prove his point with silly determination, but eventually... 'Okay, Mikey, being a great kisser won't make me give up.' My wrists already forgotten. 'Right, where were we?' I asked, making sure to touch our lips when I spoke. 'You were going to take it back.' 'Was I?' 'Huh-hum,' he whispered, closing his eyes. You could say he was giving in. I licked his lips and he eagerly opened his mouth to accept the kiss... that never happened. 'Maybe after I take a shower.' I pushed him aside and quickly got out of bed, running to the bathroom - not without wincing from the pain, you know. 'Mikey, what the fuck?! Come back here, now!' But he was the one who went after me. Sure I never locked the door, what do you take me for, crazy? I'd never miss a shower fuck! And it was so amazingly hot. I was turning into a prune by the time we decided to go back... to bed. Yes, I'm talking a fuck fest here. Neither of us could get enough of touching, kissing, licking, fucking each other. Thank God Brian had the brilliant idea of disconnecting and turning off all available phones around, leaving us unreachable to the outside world. It was a day like no other. We talked for hours, especially about our past and all the times we where about to take the big step of telling the other how we really felt. It's incredible how much you delay your happiness due to stupid fears. And you know what? Your fears, most of them, are only in your head, and you waste years of your life waiting for a perfect opportunity that will never come. There's no such thing as a perfect moment in time where everything will fall into place and say 'hey, that's it, the world has come to a halt for you to finally gather your courage and do it'. Life is a sequence of accidents that are meant to be, though sometimes we can really pass them buy and ignore completely what happens around us. I have no idea what the future plans for us, but there's one thing I know: I'll live every second of this with my heart opened; opened to love, opened to Brian. I know it's not going to be easy. There's too much unfulfilled expectations and delayed feelings waiting to be unleashed. I'm not the only one expecting a lot. Brian is too. And I am so afraid of letting him down, some way. He's suffered so much already, in his life. He's been deprived of love and that caused him to run from it like hell. However, things are different with me, have always been. I'm the one he trusts, I'm the one he's given his heart to. And this bond that's always linked us is stronger now. I guess it's how he said: we can't back down now, even we fuck it up. I wouldn't trade these wonderful hours we've been together for what we had before, not even if tomorrow we find out we can't live with each other. I know it will be impossible for us to go back to best friends mode, and I don't want to. We've trespassed the line, crossed the border; most of all we've abandoned half, it doesn't satisfy us anymore, we want whole. And half will never be enough anymore, never. We're whole now. finally.
He feigned innocence. 'I don't know what you're talking about.' 'Oh, my God! It was you! Shit! Brian, what did you do?' 'I told you I don't know what you're talking about. And besides, what would I have done that could possibly make her give up? I'm not Rage, you know?' He said, casually putting some jam on his bread. 'Liar.' I teased him - he really hates being called that. He raised an eyebrow as a silent threat, widening those already big hazel eyes. 'Liar.' I repeated, more firmly this time, sustaining his gaze. 'Take it back.' 'No way!' He rested his bread on the tray. 'Take it back, Novotny.' 'You're lying, Kinney, and you know it,' I said smiling. He was SO not pleased. He took hold of my wrist in a flash, and twisted it wickedly. I was more surprised than hurt with that attitude. 'Ah! I... didn't know. you liked it rough, Kinney.' 'You have no idea how rough I like it. Are you taking it back?' 'Make me' I said in a mix of challenge and seduction. He kept the pressure on my wrist and pushed the tray aside, giving him enough room to pin me on the headboard. Within inches from my face, he kept on demanding me to take it back. I was almost intoxicated by his proximity; the idea of another searing kiss was giving me a hard time, literally, until I couldn't take it anymore and ravished his mouth. He fought back to prove his point with silly determination, but eventually... 'Okay, Mikey, being a great kisser won't make me give up.' My wrists already forgotten. 'Right, where were we?' I asked, making sure to touch our lips when I spoke. 'You were going to take it back.' 'Was I?' 'Huh-hum,' he whispered, closing his eyes. You could say he was giving in. I licked his lips and he eagerly opened his mouth to accept the kiss... that never happened. 'Maybe after I take a shower.' I pushed him aside and quickly got out of bed, running to the bathroom - not without wincing from the pain, you know. 'Mikey, what the fuck?! Come back here, now!' But he was the one who went after me. Sure I never locked the door, what do you take me for, crazy? I'd never miss a shower fuck! And it was so amazingly hot. I was turning into a prune by the time we decided to go back... to bed. Yes, I'm talking a fuck fest here. Neither of us could get enough of touching, kissing, licking, fucking each other. Thank God Brian had the brilliant idea of disconnecting and turning off all available phones around, leaving us unreachable to the outside world. It was a day like no other. We talked for hours, especially about our past and all the times we where about to take the big step of telling the other how we really felt. It's incredible how much you delay your happiness due to stupid fears. And you know what? Your fears, most of them, are only in your head, and you waste years of your life waiting for a perfect opportunity that will never come. There's no such thing as a perfect moment in time where everything will fall into place and say 'hey, that's it, the world has come to a halt for you to finally gather your courage and do it'. Life is a sequence of accidents that are meant to be, though sometimes we can really pass them buy and ignore completely what happens around us. I have no idea what the future plans for us, but there's one thing I know: I'll live every second of this with my heart opened; opened to love, opened to Brian. I know it's not going to be easy. There's too much unfulfilled expectations and delayed feelings waiting to be unleashed. I'm not the only one expecting a lot. Brian is too. And I am so afraid of letting him down, some way. He's suffered so much already, in his life. He's been deprived of love and that caused him to run from it like hell. However, things are different with me, have always been. I'm the one he trusts, I'm the one he's given his heart to. And this bond that's always linked us is stronger now. I guess it's how he said: we can't back down now, even we fuck it up. I wouldn't trade these wonderful hours we've been together for what we had before, not even if tomorrow we find out we can't live with each other. I know it will be impossible for us to go back to best friends mode, and I don't want to. We've trespassed the line, crossed the border; most of all we've abandoned half, it doesn't satisfy us anymore, we want whole. And half will never be enough anymore, never. We're whole now. finally.