wow... well, here's the results!

mush - 3, race - 6, jack - 2, skittery - 3

looks like race outdid everyone! haha! the rest that i have are: mush, crutchy, specs, david, skittery, bumlets, and jack. don't forget to tell me which one you want to go next! ^^

btw, the first paragraph says something about mush... it might not make sense NOW, but when you read mush's story, just refer back and it'll all click together. *nod* ok, go read now!

~*~

Fear

~*~

Another question, huh? It's a good thing you caught me when I ain't playing cards. You're a lucky one. Oh—is that what you're asking this time? You sure this has nothing to do with Mush talking to you 'cause if you—okay, good… you didn't. Hmmm… fear. I never really thought about that lately, 'cause really, who has the time to do that? Well, maybe YOU do, but you're just you.

No, its not my fear that I lose all my money in a bet… or have the horse that I pick not win…. Although, that'd really be bad… I mean, where am I going to get all that money? I can't keep on asking the boys for money again, can I? Anyways… for me, it's about taking chances. Nothing happens to you if all you do is sit around and wait for something to come up to you. You gotta work your way to where you want to be. That's what I know.

I don't know if this is exactly my fear, but its what I feel, so I guess it counts, right? My fear is… not being able to take chances. Not being able to choose what I want. See, if you're smart enough you'd see where my betting and playing cards would tie in with this. I really thought you would've figured it out by now. You see, I want to know that I have the choice whether or not to wake up or go back to sleep. To choose whether I want to tease my friends endlessly. But those are just the little things, you know?

Its knowing whether you can choose what you WANT to be. Nobody told me to go to the racetrack, play cards, and smoke cigars… I did that 'cause I wanted to. Nothing hard about that. And I know I can be more… and I will… I want to own one of those gambling clubs. Hey, I know it all, so why don't I make one in the future?

I know, I'm getting ahead of myself, but I still got the CHOICE of whether I should do it or not. You see where I'm going with this? 'Cause really, without choices… we're just a bunch of people walking around doing what one person tells us to do. So where's the purpose in all of that? Nothing, I tell you.

And I sure made a choice when I left my family. There was nothing for me to look forward to. Either it was a punch on the face from my father or a verbal slap from my mother. It was a no-win situation. It really didn't help either that my father blamed everything on me. Heh, that's what happens when you're the only child. All their attention is on you. I'd rather say this the short way… they really didn't treat me, or anyone else in fact, right. I mean, who wouldn't leave a family that loved you? Right. That's what I thought.

Okay, look--- there's Skittery and the others… I was just waiting for them. So to wrap it all up, my fear's not having a choice of doing what I want. There, I said it. Now, I choose for YOU to go so I can play poker with my friends.

-Racetrack Higgins

~*~

thanks for the reviews! i luv you guys so much! *hands out cookies and muffins* and for the hundredth time *lol*, i'm still writing if they only knew! it just takes me a while... i feel so bad cuz i get distracted by my random ideas. :P

Shout-outs

Sagey: you finally caught up! hahah! all that reading you did in one night... lol. post up more for santa fe! ^^

Sapphy: lmao, why do you think fish is so scary? i like fish! :P lol. hahah, don't worry! i'm still gonna write for if they only knew! i know what to do and everything... its just that i keep getting distracted by this! lol. not that i'm saying that random ideas are bad... :P

BoogityWhuup14: aw, how come you changed your username? what was wrong with spazjoslyn? i liked it! heheh.

Frenchygoyl: yay! i love getting new reviewers! ^^ *waves* hi! hahah, thanks! wow, everyone wants race to go next...

Oneconfusednewsie: yeah, i agree! see, if i couldn't sing or write AT ALL i'd just burst!

Justduck: "It's hard to be creative in an uncreative environment!" hah! *points at all reviews that read if they only knew* read that! lol. hmm... okie dokie. i'm going to blockbuster tomorrow anyways to get bruce almighty. that was such a funnie movie! aww... your guinea pig should be skittery! and if it fits him, its better!

evenstar: hahah, i know!!! don't worry, i'm still writing for that... just takes me a while to get it all through! ^^

striker: i knew that you were gonna pick race! hah! lol.