Chapter Twenty-Five: The Laboratory of Ernias Winthrop
When Evangeline and Severus appeared within the landscape they took a moment to get oriented and then glanced around. Over to one side of the painting, they saw Remus waiting patiently for them. The expression on his face was one of misgiving as he directed his attention outside the confines of the picture. He seemed to be contemplating the swirling fog that filled the netherworld through which they were about to travel, and his thoughts didn't look to be very pleasant judging from the tense look on his face.
Knowing how unsettling this kind of travel could be for those who didn't belong here, Evangeline glanced up at Severus and squeezed his hand in a reassuring manner. "Are you okay with this, Severus? I've never gotten the feeling that you're too comfortable in here."
Snape glanced coolly down at his wife. "I'm fine, Evangeline."
As she stared into his eyes, she saw a flicker of something deep in their depths. Hoping it was feeling for her, she took one last try at getting through to him. "Severus…please, can't we talk things over like rational people. I love you so much. My life is empty without you. I don't want to end our marriage. I long to spend my days at your side and my nights in your arms. I missed you so much when you were gone."
Stiffening up at her words, he dropped her hand as if he loathed having to touch her and his features twisted up into a sneer. "Are you regretting taking an animal as a lover, Evangeline? Well it's too late to change things now…much too late. I no longer have any interest in being your husband, you should be grateful that Lupin wants you. I do not. Let's just get this over with, shall we?" Abruptly he whirled around and strode purposely away from her heading across the painting to where Lupin stood quietly and watched them.
A strong shiver of pain coursed through the wounded witch, and she forced back the tears that sprang instantly to her eyes at the cold harsh finality of his rejection. If he'd slapped her across the face with his hand it wouldn't have hurt her any deeper. "Oh, yes, let's get this ordeal over with, by all means," she thought as she forced her feet to move after her retreating husband. By the heaviness of her heart, she knew she was rapidly reaching the end of her endurance for his disdain. He looked at her now the same way he had all those years ago when he'd opened the door at her knock and sneered down into her face for the first time. It was as if everything that had happened to them in the time between had been nothing but a dream…an illusion…a mirage. It appeared that her decision was the right one. He no longer wanted her…would never want her again.
Slowly Evangeline followed Severus over to the side of the painting. She felt lost. Every time he spoke to her the pain got worse. He seemed to have nothing left for her in his heart except disgust. When she came up along side of them, both men focused their attention on her, knowing that they could make no move here without her assistance. Remus regarded her with a gentle but sad smile on his perpetually tired face, but Severus stared at her with a stony expression with nothing but cold haughty contempt in his eyes. She tried desperately to make her face into an impassive mask that could hide the deep suffering that swept through her sluggishly like thick cold blood but despite her best efforts the pain oozed out from every pore.
Having noticed that the unhappily married couple had exchanged words he hadn't heard, Remus frowned in concern when he took note of her pale face and sad glistening eyes realizing that the cause of her distress was most likely standing right here next to them like a stiff inky blot on the landscape. Sick of the abuse Snape kept piling onto his wife's shoulders, he turned to the man and barked sharply at him. "What the hell did you say to her now, Snape? Why can't you just talk to her in a civilized manner? She's your wife for gods sake, doesn't that mean anything to you?"
"It certainly meant nothing to you werewolf when you crawled eagerly into her bed. Don't talk to me about civilized manners. In my experience, animals like you know nothing about them," the Potions Master exclaimed waspishly.
Lupin clenched his fists and had to work extra hard not to use them on Snape's insufferably smug face. "For the last time, Snape, we all thought you were dead! I would never have encroached on your marriage if I'd thought otherwise, but as far as either of us knew, Evangeline was a widow. Had been a widow for well over a year! Are you really so selfish and petty that you'd want her to be alone for the rest of her life rather than have someone be there for her…take care of her…love her? How could you possibly wish that on her? Didn't you ever love her at all?"
Evangeline took a sharp breath at Remus' question and stared at her husband in dread, for the first time, uncertain of the answer. Once she'd never have doubted his love, but now? Perhaps she had been deluding herself all along? It's not as if he'd made a habit of saying the words. Is it possible that Severus never loved her at all? If it was true she never wanted to know…just the thought that the last two years of her life could be nothing but a lie was more hurtful than she could stand.
Snape stared at Evangeline's stricken face with an odd cast to his deep dark eyes. Didn't she know how much he'd loved her? Surely Lupin's arrogant question wouldn't make her doubt the depth of the feelings he'd had for her…still had for her, even if he could no longer admit them. She was the only person in his whole life that he had truly loved…would ever truly love. She alone had kept him sane and alive throughout the most horrible ordeal that he'd ever experienced. With a tearing at his soul, he wrenched his eyes away from her face and turned away from both of them wanting to hide his thoughts from their questioning eyes. "My feelings are my own, werewolf. You have no right to them. Don't we have somewhere we should be going?" He exclaimed in a harsh and bitter tone.
Evangeline nodded in a daze. Suddenly every moment spent standing here talking felt like a moment in hell. Wanting to get this over with as soon as possible, she stuck out her ice-cold hands and each man grasped one of them firmly. Both of their palms were a bit slick with nervous perspiration.
"Are you ready?" She whispered in a choked voice. They both nodded silently. "Then let's go." Suiting words to action, she strode boldly forward into the swirling mist, and they followed, clinging desperately to her hands as if their lives depended on not losing contact with her. Which in fact, they did.
As they moved through the mist as quickly as they could, Evangeline reflected on how uncomfortable it was to be here with her estranged husband on one side and her recent lover on the other. Seldom had she been in a more awkward position. Once this was over, and her father's research had been destroyed, she was simply going to have to put as much space as she could between herself and both of these men as soon as possible. She couldn't be with Remus any longer, and she couldn't stand having Severus continue to look at her like she was leftover garbage. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, it appeared her marriage was indeed over…his cruel words left her with no doubt. To think anything else was the most foolish self-delusion. Only one more task to accomplish.
In a very short time, they came out of the mists into a familiar painting, familiar at least to Evangeline. They found themselves in an elegant bedroom with a beautiful woman sitting in a chair and facing the surface of the painting. A young girl stood by her side and leaned affectionately against her. Both figures were frozen in place like waxwork statues, beautifully lifelike yet totally inert.
Evangeline dropped her companion's hands and walked over to gently touch the cheek of the woman in the chair. Snape and Lupin followed her curiously, breathing more easily now that they were out of the stifling mist.
"Who are they, Angel?" Asked Lupin.
Evangeline took a deep breath and smiled sadly at him. "The woman is my mother, and the child is me, as I was at five years of age."
Snape had recognized Evangeline's mother and had made the assumption that the child must be his wife as a little girl. It was strange but compelling to be able to walk around the figures and see them in this manner. Evangeline had been an attractive little girl, with slightly curly warm brown hair and a sweet smile, but she held none of the promise of the stunning beauty of her mother. As Snape stared at the figure of his wife as a child, he found himself wondering if their daughter would have looked like that someday if she'd lived. He shook himself mentally, recoiling from the surprising stab of pain the thought gave him. No, better off not thinking about it.
Galatea Winthrop had been an amazingly beautiful woman, with a classic oval face, a cupid's bow mouth, huge green eyes, and masses of strawberry blonde hair. Her skin was like flawless alabaster, and she held herself with the confidence of one who was totally content and happy with herself and her life. It was easy to see why she might have captivated someone so intensely. Evangeline shared only one thing with her mother, it seemed. Her sparkling emerald eyes, there they were identical.
Evangeline sighed as she gazed at her mother with longing. "My mother was beautiful, but I don't look much like her, I'm afraid. I take after my father a bit more. Perhaps that was a good thing. Maybe having a bit more human in me helped to anchor me in the real world. I do miss her, though…so very much."
Lupin smiled kindly at her and rested a warm comforting hand on her shoulder. "You're every bit as beautiful as your mother, Evangeline. Just in a different way."
Evangeline patted his hand and smiled back in gratitude for his offer of comfort. Seeing her mother again, after so long, was harder than she'd have thought it would be.
Snape clenched his fists at his side at having to watch yet another example of their affection for one another. Why couldn't this simply be over with so he didn't have to put up with the pain of them sticking all these public knives into his heart over and over again? Throwing a black glower at Lupin, he snarled desperately, "If the two of you could possibly stop drooling over each other for awhile, it would be nice to stop wasting time and get this tedious task over with some time today!"
Evangeline's face blanched severely at his cutting words. Was he determined to misunderstand every move she made?
Lupin frowned back at Snape. "I'm simply trying to make Evangeline feel better. Are you so without human feeling that you can't tell that being back here and seeing her mother again is hard for her? Is there really a heart underneath that black shroud you wear or do you exist with nothing more than a block of ice in your chest?"
Snape stiffened and took a menacing step towards Lupin, but Evangeline stepped between them and gazed at Severus pleadingly. "Please. Not now."
Snape stared at her for a moment, then nodded his head and with one final glare at Lupin stepped back away from the two of them to stew silently.
Lupin gave Evangeline an apologetic look and murmured his regrets, "I'm sorry, Evangeline."
She nodded haltingly and turned away to look once more at her mother's still form.
"Why isn't this painting animated?" Lupin looked at her curiously.
"My father wouldn't ever have allowed another animated version of my mother to exist. It apparently took a lot of convincing just to get him to allow this painting to be created even without the use of animating potions."
She sighed and turned away from the still figures of her past to face the living figures soon to also be of her past. Did she really have a future? At the moment she couldn't imagine one. With a cold tired voice she said, "You're right, Severus, we're just wasting time. Let's get this over with."
Briskly she strode over to the painting's surface, and the two wizards followed her still glaring at one another. She stuck her hand out and Snape reached over quickly to take it. "I'll go first." He stated firmly.
"Why?" Lupin growled, still a bit disgruntled with Snape's unpleasant manner.
Snape raised a haughty eyebrow, "If there's any danger awaiting us out there, I'm likely to be better equipped to handle it than you are."
Lupin frowned in annoyance, "What makes you think so? You didn't do particularly well at Malfoy's house now did you?"
With eyes that blazed with sudden hatred, Snape spat back, "You have no idea what I faced at Malfoy Manor. At least, I survived which is more than you'd have done."
"I'm as good with a wand as you are! I'm well qualified to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts, you know. I'd be happy to prove it to you if you dare to back up your sly insinuations with actions." Lupin snarled angrily.
Snape's eyebrows both flew up to his hairline and he smirked nastily at the werewolf. "Are you challenging me to a duel, Lupin?"
Lupin bristled with anger and menace, "Someone needs to wipe that smug expression off your ugly face. I'm pretty sick of staring at it myself."
Snape drew his wand with a fluid motion and opened his mouth to respond when Evangeline stepped between them once more and smacked her husband smartly in the chest with her open palm. He dropped his gaze to her in astonishment as she glared first at him then at Lupin and exclaimed, "A minute ago you were worried that we were wasting time, and now all of a sudden you want to duel?? We have a job to do here…an important job, in case the two of you have forgotten. Let's just do it, and then we can all go our separate ways. You can play your stupid macho games later once we're finished here, and I don't have to watch!"
Both wizards looked intensely uncomfortable at her angry words, and Snape slid his wand back up into his sleeve once more. With a final glare of disgust for the childishness of the two wizards, Evangeline turned once more to the surface of the painting and stuck out her hand. "I seriously doubt if there's a pack of Death Eaters lurking on the other side of this painted surface, but I can nip through and check it out in advance if the two of you can't agree on who should enter the study first."
"There's no need for that, Evangeline. If Severus wants to go first then I see no reason to stop him." Lupin stated quietly.
"Thank you, Remus. Well, Severus, shall we?" She turned her hand towards her husband. Without a word he stepped up next to her and grasped her hand tightly, then he turned his gaze pointedly away from her and towards the surface of the painting.
She shrugged off his snub and returned her gaze to the werewolf. "I'll be back in a moment, Remus."
The couple then disappeared through the uneven surface. She was indeed back in a moment's time to take Lupin with her out of the painting and into her father's study.
When Evangeline and Remus entered the study together, they found Snape examining some of Ernias' books. The room was full of bookcases. It was a fairly large room with a mahogany desk in one corner and a few comfortable chairs grouped in the other corners. French doors led out of the room onto a flagstone terrace that overlooked a nice broad sloping lawn.
Remus' eyes flew to Snape as he perused the titles on the shelves with what appeared to be great interest. "Books look threatening, do they Severus?" He exclaimed mildly.
Snape shot his rival a withering glare but refrained from making any comment.
Evangeline tried to ignore both men and instead looked around the familiar room with sadly wistful eyes, then slowly she crossed the room to the only other painting that hung on the walls. It was quite big and depicted an ornate wooden door with a large golden lock. Snape and Lupin joined her as she contemplated the picture in silence.
"An odd subject for a painting." Was Lupin's comment as he studied the large canvas hanging in front of him.
Evangeline smiled. "I suppose so, but not so odd for a door to look like a door."
Abruptly she reached out and took Lupin's hand without waiting for their argument over who should go first to be rekindled and then disappeared inside the picture with him. Unlike with most paintings, Snape noticed that they truly disappeared behind the door. He couldn't see them moving around inside as he usually could when Evangeline was inside a painting.
Suddenly she appeared again for him. As he reached for her hand he commented on his observation. She smiled grimly. "I told you this painting was different. You'll see when you get inside." With that cryptic remark, she touched the surface lightly, and the picture sucked them in.
The space behind the door consisted entirely of a long straight tunnel heading deep into the wall. Usually paintings didn't have a great deal of true depth to them. The space was off to the side where they gave access to the netherworld. This was indeed different. There was no access to the stifling mists here only the deep passageway leading to another closed door at its far end.
They swiftly walked the length of the gloomy tunnel; their footsteps sounded oddly muffled in the stifling and claustrophobic atmosphere. They were all a trifle relieved when they came to the next door. No one would object to leaving this uncomfortable painting…not even Evangeline. This painted door looked just like the first one, large and ornately carved with a big golden lock on it. This too was different. Usually the surface of a canvas was opaque from the inside with a hint of light coming through it, but this just looked like the outside surface of any painting. Apparently these particular pictures didn't really have a surface like the usual painting would. Evangeline once more took the two wizards through the door one at a time, and they finally found themselves at their destination, Ernias Winthrop's laboratory.
The laboratory was very large and still well lit by magical lanterns on the wall, but its lack of recent use was apparent. Dust was rather thick on the work surfaces, as well as on the large scarred wooden desk that occupied the nearest corner. The air, too, felt rather stale and musty.
The three of them separated and began to look around. Severus headed immediately for the desk while Remus poked his head into cupboards. Evangeline simply stood and gazed around the familiar room and remembered the father that she'd loved so very much…and still mourned, deeply. It was a bittersweet experience for her to be here again. She'd often accompanied her father here when he needed access and her mother wasn't available. Coming here had been a real treat to her, and she'd always begged to stay and watch him work.
Ernias had always let his much beloved only child stay with him if she wished, as long as she didn't touch anything. A potions laboratory could be a dangerous place for a young child after all, and she'd always been obedient to his rules. She'd found it fascinating to sit on a nearby stool and watch him bent over a cauldron concocting some complicated potion. Her early attraction to Severus was probably somewhat prompted by these pleasant memories from her past. Her father had been the great hero of her youth, and in addition to her very deep love, she had a boundless admiration for him and his accomplishments. Spending time in a potions laboratory had always felt like home.
While exploring the far end of the room, Remus found a door in the wall and called to the others. "Evangeline. Where does this go? Could it possibly lead to that other entrance to the lab that Severus seems so sure exists?"
Snape raised his head from the books and papers on the desk that he was avidly examining and frowned down the length of the room at Lupin. Jarred from her reminiscences by his call, Evangeline walked over to join Remus. "I don't know, Remus. When I was small, I was told never to touch this door, so I never did. I was a boringly obedient child, I suppose, but being here with my father was important to me. I didn't want to do anything that might cause him to ban me from the lab."
"Well, you're not a child anymore. Shall we see where it goes?" He grinned at her with a mischievous sparkle in his amber eyes.
Quite curious to finally see what was behind the door after all these years, she nodded. "I suppose so."
Snape had quietly come up behind them and the two of them watched as Remus opened the door wide so that what was behind it was revealed. The vision that was laid open for their startled eyes was hard to make sense of. The door had hidden what looked like a glowing ball of various colored passageways that twisted and turned and doubled back on each other. The churning motion made them all a little queasy to watch.
Remus gaped at it in surprise. "What the hell is it?"
"It's a Knot." Stated Snape calmly.
Both Evangeline and Remus looked at him in surprise. "A Knot?"
Snape nodded and raised an eyebrow at Lupin. "Yes, a twisted labyrinth of magical passages. This is a fixed entrance apparently, somewhat unusual I believe. Most of the time the entrances to Knots are not fixed, and instead must be summoned with a particular incantation and a password. Then finding your way through one requires the use of various illumination spells. I'm surprised that you haven't heard of Knots, Lupin. Just how good did you say you were at teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts? Your definition of "well qualified" and mine seem to differ greatly. What a surprise."
Lupin bristled once more at Snape's scornful tone. "I've heard of Knots, Severus. I've just never actually run into one before. They're fairly rare after all."
Snape shrugged and stated coolly. "Neither have I, but I had no trouble recognizing it for what it was."
With an aggravated frown, Lupin opened his mouth to retort, but Evangeline stepped in and stopped him. "I've heard more than enough bickering from you two. It's juvenile, and it gives me a headache. Please, let's try to grow up a bit and at least pretend that the two of you are adults."
Both men gaped at her, surprised at her sharp tone. She went on. "If this is the alternate entrance to the lab that you were so concerned about, Severus, how easy would it be to get in here if it's discovered?"
"It's not impossible to unravel a Knot, if you know that's what you're looking for. The passwords are individual, but the summoning incantation and illuminating spells that are used to find the door and then navigate the passages are fairly standard. I imagine the possibility simply hasn't dawned on the Dark Lord, yet. Knots aren't particularly common, as apparently even Lupin knows. However, the Dark Lord is well versed in protective magic. Eventually, the possibility will occur to him. Then, it should be relatively easy for his Death Eaters to gain access."
With a firm nod of her head Evangeline reached over and closed the door on the stomach churning Knot. "Okay, that settles it. If there was ever even the smallest doubt…there isn't any longer. We have to destroy whatever we find here. There's no other choice."
Without any further words, they quickly resumed their search for answers. It didn't take long for most of their interest to focus on the dusty desk in the corner. The cabinets and work surfaces seemed to mostly hold equipment and ingredients that could be used in various potions. The desk seemed to hold all of Ernias' notebooks and papers.
Snape read through many of them very quickly and looked up at the other two as they watched him silently. "This does seem to be what we're looking for. These books detail all the work he did to bring your mother out of her painting, Evangeline. The recipes for the potions that kept her anchored here in the real world are in this book here." He picked one up that was covered in green dragon hide. "There's more preliminary work on a few other intriguing projects as well…things no doubt left undone by his death."
Evangeline nodded sadly. "Yes, so ironic for someone who had the secrets of long life at his fingertips to die so relatively young in an accident. Well, let's get to work then. We need to destroy all of it. Now."
She spun around and walked back across the room to a very large cauldron and peeked inside. "This should be big enough. Just fill it up and set it ablaze. That would be easiest I guess."
Snape ran his fingertips caressingly over the books in front of him. "I really hate to destroy these. It seems like such a waste."
Evangeline looked over at him with cold eyes. "A lot of precious things are wasted in this life, Severus. Life isn't fair."
His eyes came up to meet hers for a long moment, then he dropped his gaze and began to gather up the books and papers. "No…it's not." He murmured softly.
While Remus and Evangeline attended to the chore of burning all of Ernias' books and papers, Snape went through the cabinets and destroyed any of the more rare potion ingredients, anything that might give a clue as to its importance in the research that no longer existed. They wanted to be absolutely sure after all that they destroyed anything that might be of any value to their enemies.
When they were through and stood once more before the dedicated painting, Evangeline took one final look around her father's lab and felt her eyes fill up with tears. Saying good-bye was hard, but she knew she'd never set foot here again. "Good-bye, Daddy." She whispered in a soft pain laced voice. "I'm so sorry…I hope you can forgive me."
Then she took the wizards back into the long tunnel heading for the study. When they reached the other end she took Remus into the study first and then returned for Severus. She took his hand in hers for a final time and looked up into his dark eyes. She'd missed those eyes so very much, looking into their depths had always warmed her heart so deeply. No one that she'd ever met had eyes that were as deep and beautiful as his were. It was a gift to be able to look into their depths one last time.
"I'm sure that you and Remus can report on our success to Albus, Severus. You can use the Portkeys or simply apparate back to Hogwarts from outside the house. I won't be joining you there. There's no need for me to return to Hogwarts again. I won't bother you anymore. I'm sure that you'll be relieved not to have to see me again. It seems to be what you want more than anything."
Saying these words was even harder than she'd feared, and she paused and took a painful breath before forcing herself to continue. "If you're still determined to legally end our marriage, just do it. I won't fight you any longer. I'll do whatever you want. I don't have the energy to argue with you anymore, and I'm tired of pleading uselessly. It just prolongs the agony for both of us. I love you, Severus. I'll always love you…no one else could ever take your place, but it seems you think you'll be happier without me in your life, and I'll always want you to be happy. It's the only thing I truly care about."
His throat went dry and tight at the thought that he really might never see her again. "I'm sure that you and Remus will be very happy together, Evangeline." He stated firmly in the best mocking tone he could muster.
She smiled sadly at him with tears once more in her eyes and caressed his hand lovingly with her own. "You just won't listen, will you? Despite what you seem to be determined to believe. I don't love Remus, I never have, and he and I are not going to be together…not ever again. I'm leaving here alone…and that's the way I expect to spend whatever is left of my life. I'll never make the mistake of letting anyone else into my life again, I assure you. I learned my lesson well. There will never be a substitute for you in my heart. There never has been, and there never could be. You're the only man I want in my life, Severus. The only one. If I can't have you…I'd rather be alone."
Snape's heart constricted at the overwhelming agony in her voice, and fear suddenly clutched at his throat. Had he somehow misread the situation between her and Lupin? Is it possible that the only thing he'd done was to force her out into the world alone…away from all protection? No! She couldn't go off alone! It wasn't safe. "Evangeline…." He began with fear in his voice, but before he could get any farther in his plea, she reached out and touched the painting's surface. The next thing either of them knew they'd joined Remus in the study, but they found that they weren't the only ones. The room was now filled with half a dozen Death Eaters in masks and robes and standing in front of them grinning maliciously, was Lucius Malfoy.
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Author's Notes: I've added the URLs for the yahoo groups where I've archived my artwork to my profile page if anyone is interested.
Jezebel: I'm sorry that I'm frustrating you. I hope that I'm entertaining you as well.
Whale of the World: They all have a lot to think about at the moment.
Manic: The story has a life of its own. I just write down what it tells me.
Elaine Lahey: Telling me that I bring the characters to life is absolutely the nicest thing you could say to me. Thank you. No psychology degree here…Art and Library Science only. :)
ProphetDreams: Okay, I put the URLs on my profile page. I have several illustrations in the folder that pertain to Evangeline and Severus in addition to the portrait from Chapter 5. If you have suggestions, I'd be glad to hear them. :)
Snapefan51: If Evangeline kills herself, she'd have company following quickly, no question. Did the gremlins get another one of your reviews? Bad gremlins!
Rickfan37: Thank you. You always manage to see something that everyone else misses. :) Hope is in short supply at the moment, I'm afraid.
Jasara: He's still got his anger. It's rather muffled in his pain, but it's still there. He let Remus see a bit of it this chapter.
Lisa Beattie: A little action this chapter…lots more next chapter. :)
Werecat99: Lucious Lucius is back! Are you happy? Why assume Snape would have to go to St. Mungo's? I guess no one else has as much faith in Madam Pomfrey as I do.
Anyta: Thank you for the very kind offer. I'll think about it. I'm not sure that I could send you "Snape's Christmas Carol" as one document. I think it would be too big for a single attachment. Could you take it in more than one and then put it together? That's an awful lot of work. Have you done much translating? Are you sure that you'd want to tackle a job that big?
Lina Lupin: The sea does play its part in the story. I grew up on the coast, and I always found looking at the ocean to be good for an unsettled mind.