Welcome to Chapter 3 of 'Oh My Metal Gear!'. Thanks for enjoying the last episode. It seems a lot of you kind folk WANT the Snake/Urd pairing to happen, huh? Well, you got it. I had considered pairing Otacon with Skuld at first, but when last I checked on the profiles of the Goddess sisters, she's twelve Earth years old! Guess that can't work out...But I will be pairing him up with Megumi, she's SOOOO cute. Anyone seen the first episode in Japanese?

Speaking of which, just how many episodes of Oh My Goddess there in existence? A friend who had the first five episodes (which I'm now avidly watching as I write) from a fan sub said that's all there is. Somehow, I think that's not possible. So if there's anyone who know just how many OMG tv episodes and movies out there, please tell me.

Anyway, on to the fic. When last we saw our heroes, Snake and Keiichi got to know about each other, while in the process, being spotted by enemy sentries which Snake took care of. Belldandy, Urd and Skuld learns of the situation at Nekomi Tech and venture off to find and rescue Keiichi and friends, but just as Belldandy enters the campus, she learns that there's a dangerous intruder, namely a cyborg ninja who took out a squadron of sentries without killing them. Snake and Keiichi steps in just in time to save Belldandy, but the ninja gives some warning advice before disappearing. Skuld and Urd enters, and well, as she and Snake set their eyes on each other...I can't do anymore of this, it's just too much. Let's get to what happens after Skuld and Keiichi falls, okay?

Oh, and do not forget to review, please. I really need them to continue this fic. I'm not trying to make this better than 'COE', but at least just having some fun from that main work. Enjoy.

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ShardclwKusanagi presents:

Oh My Metal Gear!

Chapter 3: Of Guns, Cigs and Goddessess

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After Keiichi and Skuld recovered from their sudden fall from seeing Snake meeting Urd, Snake took the time to look at Keiichi's friends. But it wasn't before Urd spoke, still having her eyes drawn to the mercenary's muscular body.

'Whoa, I've never seen a mortal so- - dangerously sexy.' Urd thought to herself. "Hey, Keiichi, who's your friend?" she smiled, licking her lips. If she wasn't so much as a goddess, she would lose all functions of her body at the sight of Snake. Skuld looked on, seeing Urd swooning over Snake and boldly stepped forward.

"Urd! Now isn't the time for this!" Skuld said. "There could be more of these guys around somewhere!"

Snake looked at Skuld and nodded. "The brat learns fast. That ninja may have no doubt caused some noise to attract the enemy. Let's get to a further distance from here."

"Brat?" Skuld looked at Snake with a childish stare that made him chuckle. "You'd better watch your mouth, mister. You have no idea what you're dealing with here."

"That's my line. Why are three lovely ladies like you doing here?" Snake said, examining the sentries to see if they are still alive.

"Lovely ladies?" Skuld and Urd blushed together. Urd's face was getting redder just listening to the tone of Snake's voice.

"We've come here to rescue Keiichi and our friends." Belldandy spoke. "But it seems that you are here too to help out, am I right?"

"No, I'm here for something else. The safety of Keiichi's buddies are just a bonus." Snake said. "By the way, I'm Solid Snake."

"Solid Snake?!" Skuld jumped. "The Solid Snake from the Shadow Moses and destroyed Metal Gear three times?"

"The one and only." Snake said smiling.

"Now I know where I've heard that name." Keiichi said. "Belldandy, this is the guy."

"I know all about this man's actions, Keiichi." Belldandy said, surprising Snake.

"You do?" Snake asked.

"You're quite popular in the Surface World defense business." Belldandy spoke, drawing some confusion between Snake and Keiichi. "The son of the greatest soldier who has lived his whole life through war."

At this point, Snake had the trademark MGS question over his head, as did Keiichi.

"What are you babbling about? Just really who are you?" Snake said, raising his right hand. It still was bleeding from the battle before and Belldandy saw the blood covered hand.

"This is Belldandy, my girlfriend. And these are her sisters, Urd and Skuld." Keiichi said.

"Oh no! You're hurt!" Belldandy said, holding Snake's hand.

"It's nothing, I've been through a lot worse. Believe me." Snake replied.

"If you don't see about this wound, it'll get infected fast. Keiichi.can I help Snake?" Belldandy asked. Keiichi knew that Belldandy wanted to help a stranger that had looked after him until Belldandy came. He simply nodded to Belldandy's request.

"I guess it wouldn't hurt if Snake knew. Go on ahead." Keiichi smiled. "You would have just helped him if I hadn't let you anyway."

"Huh?" Snake was confused to this. "What's going on here?"

"Oh, you'll see." Belldandy smiled.

Belldandy simply took Snake's hand and raised her free hand over it. Suddenly, a glow of light emanated from it. The soldier looked on in amazement as Belldandy healed his wound. When she was finished, Snake looked at his hand and couldn't keep his mouth closed as he saw as if it wasn't cut at all.

"What just happened? The wound's all gone." Snake spoke.

"This may be a surprise to you, but we three are Goddesses." Belldandy smiled.

"Goddesses? How is that possible?" Snake asked.

"A long story, one that which we don't have to tell until after this is over." Urd said, stepping towards Snake. "So, you're the Legend we gods and goddesses have heard so much about.you're even sexier than I thought, Snake."

"Uh-yeah, thanks." Snake shook his head, trying to get the nasty mental thoughts of Urd dressed in that sexy, slinky and revealing leather outfit. Her signature silver long hair flowed to the reach past even her curvaceous waist to her firm behind, which Snake wasted no time sighting. 'Damn, she's hot for a goddess.'

"Look at you, Urd! Hitting on a man you've just met! You're so unbelievable!" Skuld shouted, then she turned to look up at Snake. "And, Snake, I'm no brat!"

Snake grinned at Skuld. "Oh, yes, you are. I'm a good sense of character you know."

"No, I'm not!" Skuld shouted. "Oh, you made me so mad! You.you.you FLIRT!"

Snake didn't know just what Skuld was doing to do, but the next thing he knew, Skuld had performed one of her word spells and the word, "FLIRT" was inscribed on Snake's Sneaking Suit.

"The hell- -?" Snake growled at Skuld. "What was that?"

"That's what happens when you underestimate a goddess, pal!" Skuld stuck her tongue at Snake.

"You'd better be careful when you're around me, kid." Snake smiled, getting closer to Skuld. "Because, when I get mad, I'm not a nice guy to be around with.especially to goddesses who claim that they are older than they look."

"Why you- -you're just like Urd!" Skuld shouted. Snake took a glance at Urd, who simply stared back at him with a light nervous smile other, as he walked forward.

"Look, I can ask questions about this goddess thing later, right now, I have to get to your friends before these terrorists start to hurt someone." Snake said. "But first, that ninja.he seemed to know you, Belldandy. Any idea where you've seen him before?"

"A ninja?" Skuld asked.

"Yeah, wearing an exoskeleton suit. Just like the one Grey Fox wore at Shadow Moses." Snake said. "And I'm surprised that this one didn't kill any of these guys, only knocked them into submission."

(An exoskeleton suit? It can't be.) Skuld thought to herself.

"No, I've never met anyone like that, Snake." Belldandy said. "But whoever that was, we do better be careful in the future. There's no telling what may happen next."

"In the battlefield, you never think what's next." Snake replied. "And one thing I learned from all of this is not to trust anyone.but I'm not saying that about you guys, because you look like a nice bunch of people."

"Thank you, Snake." Belldandy smiled.

"We're almost close to the gym area. I wonder if the terrorists have gotten their demands as yet." Keiichi spoke.

Snake looked at his watch. "It's been forty-five minutes since they made their call. I'm going to contact a friend and find out what he's found."

"Snake, it's about time you told us about what's going on." Keiichi said.

"Okay, I'll be level with you guys, since Belldandy helped." Snake said. "My mission here is to find a weapon that my partner."

"Dr. Hal Emmerich, also known as Otacon?" Skuld spoke in between.

"Yeah, you goddesses know everything, don't you?" Snake asked.

"Well, not everything." Urd smiled at Snake. "Go on ahead, Snake."

"As I was saying, he uncovered some information that Metal Gear was stored here, somewhere in this campus. That's probably the reason why these bad guys are here. I just happen to show up just to confirm it's it looks like there's going to be a change mid-mission." Snake said. "If these guys get Metal Gear, look out, world."

"So, that's why you are really here, to find Metal Gear. But why here of all places?" Keiichi asked.

"You got me, but I won't forgive myself if our friends get hurt because of a weapon." Belldandy said.

"I won't stand for that either, but we can't just barge in knowing our enemy is heavily armed." Urd placed a finger at her lips. "There must be a way to get our friends out safely without killing any one."

She looked up to see Snake turn the safety off his suppressed Glock. "Listen, we can't think about if these creeps stay alive or not, or have you forgotten that we are in a middle of a war zone?"

"Why must you always think of a light situation such as this so seriously?" Belldandy spoke.

"You don't know just how dangerous this can get if Metal Gear is even activated, that's why I have to stop this from happening no matter what." Snake said in a harsh voice. "Metal Gear is bad news..you don't to be around it when its seized."

"Snake.I may not know just what hardships this Metal Gear may have brought you, but you can't keep hitting yourself that you won't be able to protect through violence alone." Belldandy said.

"You may be a goddess, true, but try placing yourself in my boots when as to what I had to go through." Snake said. There was some silence, then he shook his head. "Sorry, I shouldn't have done that."

"There's no need for apology, I can feel how you must feel whenever when you do this." Belldandy said.

"Are you a fortune teller as well? Because goddesses are able to predict what the future beholds, right?" Snake walked towards the open passageway.

"I'm sorry, but even we goddesses can't do such a thing. Even we do have limits to our powers."

"Just great. Oh, well, can't ruin the fun of what's going to happen next." Snake said. "Alright, if you say you don't approve of how I handle things, do you have any other smart ideas?"

"We can create a diversion to distract the enemy." Urd nodded her head. "I can whip up either a stun potion for the sentries."

"And I can get some smokescreen bombs made." Skuld chipped in. "And luckily, I've brought Banpei in just in case."

"VREEP!" From behind the corner where Skuld and Urd appeared, a small robotic wearing a large hat with Skuld's marking on top. Once again, that trademark MGS question mark appeared over Snake's head.

"Is that a real robot?" Snake bent low to examine Banpei, who kindly returned the handshake Snake offered.

"Yep, this is Banpei, my creation. Don't you worry, he's pretty harmful, but give him reason to attack and it's a different story." Skuld smiled. "I just wished my other inventions were as perfect though."

"Just how old are you? Keiichi said that you are an inventor." Snake said.

"That's true, and don't mistake me for some brat again." Skuld pouted. "I'm twelve years old in Earth terms, but I'm only a Goddess Second Class like Urd."

"And Urd, I'm guessing you're around twenty-ish, am I right?"

"Twenty-four to be exact. But good guess." Urd purred.

"Wait until Otacon gets word of you guys - -" Snake shook his head. "Alright, I think I know how we are we going to do this- -I'll sneak in through the vents and use one of Urd's smoke potions in the middle of the gym. Then, I'll drop in, and take them out before anyone can see what hit them. When it's safe, you guys can come on in and rescue your friends."

"What happens if there are more than you can handle?" Belldandy asked.

"If there's at least more than five guys, throw in the stun bomb Skuld said she had. Of course, I'll have to warn your friends about it, so I'll can be vulnerable for the moment." Snake said.

"I can use Holy Bell to take care of the smoke, while Banpei can help out in the rescue of our friends." Belldandy said. "And in case you do get hurt again, I can always heal the wound before it gets worst."

"Holy Bell?" Snake asked.

Belldandy nodded, as her Angel, the ever so beautiful Holy Bell appeared from behind her in a gust of wind. Snake stepped back a bit as this mission had gotten more weirder by the minute.

"You guys are unbelievable - -" Snake shook his head. "Come on. I thought having a hand for these missions would be a pain, but I can't argue. Not only you ladies are beautiful and persistent, but you want your friends to be safe."

"That's not because why we are helping you. If there is indeed a Metal Gear somewhere around here, we have to do something about it." Urd said.

"Hey, Metal Gear's a piece of artwork that you can't just dismantle, even though I should be capable for the task." Skuld said. "You need a really powerful weapon to destroy it."

"Think you can get one ready for Snake just in case Metal Gear is activated?" Keiichi asked.

"Of course."

"Taking care of Metal Gear, that's my job. I can't let any of you get mixed up in my problems." Snake said. "And I can't certainly let a woman come along.again."

Urd looked as Snake with some pity. She nodded and sighed. "I see. Is that how you want it then. But remember, we will stick around for the show.

"Wait, Snake do you have a Codec?" Skuld asked.

"Yeah, I always do. Why, kid?" Snake said.

"Give me just a second and soon everyone can patch through your frequency." The young goddess smiled, after giving Keiichi his own Codec.

"I don't think that's necessary." Before Snake finished speaking, his Codec rang. Placing a hand by his left ear, he turned on the Codec.

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Back at the Morisato residence, Megumi waited in front of the television for any good news. Since Belldandy and her sisters left, she had been wondering about just what she meant that they'll keep Keiichi safe. But before she can think of anything else that might worry her, she heard a voice from outside call out.

"Hello? Anyone home?" a young male's voice called out. Megumi went to the front door and saw a tall, American male with pale, short white hair, his skin almost matching the tone it.

"Yes? How may I help you?" Megumi cleared the hint of sadness in her throat and spoke with a smile.

"I'm looking for Keiichi Morisato, I know he's living here." the man spoke. "Is he home by any chance?"

"No, he's not home. I'm his sister, Megumi. Haven't you heard - -?" Megumi said. "There's a terrorist action going on at Nekomi Tech right now."

"What?" the man exclaimed. "Oh, no - -I'm too late - -they must have gotten to him - -"

"Late for what?" Megumi asked.

The young man nervously smiled. "Ah, it's nothing important.Sorry if I had bothered you. I'll be going now - -"

"Wait! At least tell me your name and I can leave a message for Keiichi!" Megumi shouted.

"Just tell him that Jack dropped by." He called back. "It was nice to meet you, Megumi."

As the man named Jack disappeared before Megumi can ask anymore questions, she thought to herself for a moment.

'Wait a minute - - .K-1 doesn't have any American friends named Jack - -.'.

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"Otacon, have you found anything on the terrorists?" Snake asked his friend, while Keiichi, Belldandy and her sisters watched by.

"Yeah, you wouldn't believe what I found." Otacon fixed his glasses. "These guys have no previous activities whatsoever. For all we know, they may be setting the authorities up for one big diversion."

"Why would they would this? What are they trying to gain?" Belldandy's voice rang out from the background.

"Who's that?" Otacon asked.

"Oh, I've met some more of Keiichi's friends. That was his girlfriend, Belldandy." Snake said. "Here, I'll patch her through. Otacon, meet Belldandy."

Belldandy's face appeared onscreen. "Ah, Dr. Hal Emmerich. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"How do you know who I am?" Otacon asked. But before he can answer, Skuld's face appeared.

"Wow, the famous engineer of the REX project." Skuld was hyper to see Otacon. "But, you know, you've shouldn't have built REX with a flaw, you know."

"Excuse me? Who are you to judge how REX was built?" Otacon spoke.

"I'm Skuld and all I can say to you is that if I was the one to create REX, it wouldn't be so difficult to be beaten." Skuld boasted.

"For your information, Skuld, I built REX with a character flaw. People aren't complete without one, right? And what do you know about creating Metal Gear?"

"Are you saying that I do?" Skuld said. "I'll make you so sorry you said that - -"

Snake had interrupted before Skuld can try something again. "Alright already. Otacon, before anything else happens, I'm going ahead with the plan. I'm going to rescue the hostages before time is up."

"I see. From the look of things, we don't have much time either. Better get moving, Snake." Otacon spoke. "If any of your friends want to contact me, my frequency's."

"141.12. We know." Skuld said.

"How ? Did Snake tell you?"

"Skuld and I are goddesses." Belldandy spoke.

From Otacon's background, there was a loud thud. Otacon may have fallen. (anime style.)

"Otacon, what was that?" Snake asked.

"Stupid chair! It slipped when Skuld mentioned that." Otacon rubbed his head.

"I'll explain everything later, Otacon. Just don't let that obsessive style of anime get to you next time you see something spectacular from these women." Snake said. "I'm signing off."

"Be careful, all of you. The mission's just begun." Otacon said, before he shouted. "OW! That hurts!"

After signing off, Snake turned to see Urd glancing back at him. He smiled and looked at his new comrades. He reached for one of his pouches and took out a cigarette. Just before he lit it, Belldandy talked.

"Snake, are you smoking? You really should quit." Belldandy said. "As for what it means to your health, I won't even go there. Remember what the Surgeon's General said about lung cancer rates. Everyone knows that it's a dangerous substance."

"So's war, and I've done that all my life." Snake replied.

"Well, you can screw up your own body if you like, but think about other people, okay?" Urd said, coming closer to Snake.

"This is the new kind that has almost no second-hand smoke. It won't bother anyone." Snake said, shaking his head.

"Oh really? Didn't I see you toss a butt somewhere after we turned the corner just before we meet that ninja? Littering, polluting - -" Keiichi said.

"Ummm - -"

Before Snake can reply, Urd had performed her 'Spark of the Firefly' and the cigarette was burnt to ashes before Snake could inhale.

"Hey! That was my last smoke." Snake shouted.

"You have a long way to go, Snake" Belldandy warned Snake" While we are working together to get our friends back, no smoking. It's really bad for you."

Snake looked at Keiichi with a glare. "How can you even live with this woman? She's too disciplining, like a mother.

"I love her, that's all there is to it." Keiichi spoke. "What, you never had training to keep your life in check?"

"I never knew my mother." Snake simply said.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked."

"That's alright." Snake said. He got a hold of his M9 and pointed to the vent above him. "From here, it'll be easier than being spotted again. Keiichi, Belldandy and Skuld stay near the hall until the smoke's released. Urd and I will take the sentries form above."

Urd smiled at Snake's plan and nodded. "Ladies first, Snake."

Snake didn't know that Urd was up to some naughty trick again, and as Urd started to climb to the upwards towards the ceiling and Snake was right under her, where he can see her - -

"KRAK!" The sound of Skuld's hammer on Snake's head was then heard before Snake got his share of Urd's fan service.

"Ow! Damnit!" Snake shouted, rubbing his head, and glaring at Skuld. "I'll get you back for that, kid. Bank on it."

"Ha, I like to see you try." Skuld stuck her tongue at him. " No one, not even you is getting any perverted thoughts of my sisters."

"Just get ready for the moment we get your buddies out of there." Snake said, as he climbed the ladder to the vents.

"Well, let's go rescue our friends, Kei-chan." Belldandy smiled.

"Yes, let's do it." Keiichi nodded.

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"So, Snake has decided to work with Belldandy to rescue their friends. This can throw a wrench in our plans. He's advancing the scenario faster than usual.

"No need to worry, that ninja had just the perfect timing to show up."

"Huh? The ninja wasn't my idea. Was it one of yours?" the woman spoke.

"Not mine." The male voice replied, then one of the sentries appeared from behind.

"Commanders, we've located the elevator that will take us underground." The sentry spoke. "What is are our orders now?"

"Our guests may have gotten aware that this takeover is a set up. Leave six sentries where the hostages are and get the bomb ready to detonate in ten minutes." The woman smiled. "Gather the remaining forces and meet us at the cargo elevator."

"Understood." The sentry left the two, the male got up while the woman spun on her spinning chair for fun.

"Stop that right now, Mara! If that ninja's not on our side, this could be trouble."

The woman, wearing a black, cloaked outfit, with markings similar to the goddesses on her forehead and below her eyes and had a pair of pangs. She had short pale yellow hair that looked rather messy.

"Oh relax, old man. That ninja threatened both Snake and Belldandy, so we should be safe for the while." Mara smiled wickedly. The man came up closer to Mara and cocked his Revolver at her face. Mara gulped at the sight of the gun in her face.

"I told you to call me by my real name, Demoness." The man said. "I am Shalashaska - -also called Revolver Ocelot!"

He then spun the gun in a true gunfighter's fashion with his left hand, and returned the gun back to the holster where it came from. He turned his back to her, his white ponytail and long brown trench coat flowing behind him. He walked towards the door to exit the room.

"And don't you dare forget that - -comrade." Ocelot said as he opened the door. "Come on, it' s time to collect the real prize."

When she was alone, Mara grumbled to herself. (No one threatens me and lives, mortal. No one!)

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So, there you have it, the bad guys are finally revealed! I hope you liked this Chapter, as I'm getting new ideas to make this fic better with every new Chapter.

And in case you're wondering or those who haven't got it yet, the man who talked to Megumi spoke was indeed Raiden from MGS2: Sons of Liberty. He won't be appearing anywhere else in the fic though, so too bad. That was just a cliffhanger for a sequel I already have planned, so stay tuned for that one.

Anyway, I don't have to say it, don't I? I do not own Oh My Goddess and Metal Gear Soild, they belong to their respective This fic is my idea, so there. And please review this and 'COE', which should be updated soon. (I hope.) Laters.