You're a Mean One, Mr. Snape
Snape was an evil man who lived alone with his pet crup that no one knew about in his office at Hogwarts. And his heart was much too small. One morning he woke to the sound of singing. He knew that it was Christmas. He hated Christmas more than anything. "I must stop this Christmas from coming," he thought to himself as he stood at the door of his office. But the question was how. Soon a plan, a horrible plan, but a plan nonetheless formed in his mind and he soon set off to work. Snape had heard of the muggle Santa Clause and this was key to his plan. He cut and he sewed and soon the first part of his plan was complete. But Santa had reindeer, where was he to find a reindeer. Then he spotted the moose antlers on his wall. He tied the antlers to his pet crup and harnessed him to a sled.
On Christmas Eve, Snape dressed up in his crude Santa Suit and harnessed up his crup reindeer and went out into the night. He went up to the roof of the school and jumped down the chimney. He landed with a thump in the Gryffindor common room fireplace. There he set to work dismantling the tree and taking down the Christmas decorations. Then he went back up the chimney with a little help from one of his spells and set off down the next chimney. This time he was in the Hufflepuff common room. Just as he was dismantling the tree a young girl came in. Her name was Wendy- Jimithy. "what are you doing?" she asked the spurious Santa. In a panic Snape blurted out, "little girl your tree is screwed up so I have to take it away, the fairies that are the lights have rabies and I need to get you dunces some new ones. Ok you little twerp?"
"Oh, ok." said little Wendy-Jimithy and went back to bed.
As the night wore on Snape ransacked the rest of the school of all its festive decorations and even incapacitated the house elves so they could make no feasts. Then he went home to his office.
The next day Snape heard people whispering about what he had done. Of course, no one knew it was Snape. "Ah quiet, no twit twangering, no hoot hollering, its Christmas and its quiet. That's an oxymoron if I ever saw one" Snape thought to himself. But soon he heard singing coming form the Great Hall. When Snape went in to investigate he saw everyone holding hands and singing. And Snape's heart grew three sizes that day. For he realized that it wasn't the gifts, or the food or the decorations that made Christmas. It was the love that the world had for one another.
THE END
ALTERNATE ENDING: Then while everyone was singing, Voldemort came and killed all of them and said, "God bless us every one" and laughed mercilessly.
A/N Merry Christmas Happy Hanukkah have a great Ramadan and a great Kwanza! There I think I got all of them. Anyway Happy Holidays!