Title: I Sim
Author: Kendra
Pairing: Trip/ T'Pol
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek and I don't make any money from this.
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I Sim
Trip Tucker saw no need to make it known that Sim's memories had survived him; it seemed to Trip that telling people he remembered every detail of Sim's life would only make dealing with the events that much harder for the crew. And so here he was, sat in his darkened quarters; the only light emanating from the streaking stars outside. It was the same every night since the funeral... usually by now he'd be getting ready for T'Pol's neuro- pressure session and she would some how manage to ease his pain, much as she had done for him. done for Sim before he had gone to sick bay to give up his short life.
He was under no illusions as to why she had kissed him then; it was not out of love but simple compassion, if there was one thing he had learned about T'Pol it was that behind her emotional barriers and Vulcan laws of etiquette she was a creature of amazing empathy. It was one of the many reasons he had stupidly fallen in love with her, but he was only human and he did stupid things. T'Pol would have done the same for any member of the crew in Sim's predicament.
It had been awkward for him seeing her after Sim's memories, of the kiss and his declaration of love, had become his own. It had been Sim with T'Pol then, but it might as well have been him, it sure felt like it had been.
It had been so awkward for him in fact that he had not noticed, for some time, that T'Pol had had her own troubles to deal with. Once he had begun to notice her lapses of concentration on the bridge he had felt guilt ridden that he had been so concerned with his own difficulties he never even considered what strains she had been through during this mission, he had never thought to wonder about how she was dealing with seeing that Vulcan ship that she had once served on, watching all of them, her crew mates and companions, descend into insanity while she had her own controls slowly ripped away from her.
Tucker had T'Pol; T'Pol had no one to turn to, no one that could ease her pain. And Tucker knew that she felt pain, most likely felt it more deeply than any Human could. His growing fondness for the Sub-Commander had led him to reading as much, about the Vulcan people, as he could find. It meant he knew all about their telepathic abilities, knew of their need for strong mental walls to block the emotional imprinting of other beings. Tucker had also heard of the out pouring of psychic energy felt, with immense pain, by the living when many Vulcan's die inexplicably much like they had on the Vulcan ship. He wondered if T'Pol had felt it, if she had indeed, he hoped that the pain wasn't as excruciating as it had been explained in the Vulcan database.
There was nothing he could do for her now, after last night, he had been waiting for the right time to broach the subject with her and entirely misjudged the whole situation, his timing, way off, he had offered her counsel and she had wholly refused. He had blamed himself at first for not going about the situation in the most logical of ways, calling her incompetent in her job was mostly likely not the best way to get past her defenses but after more thought and second guessing it was undoubtedly clear to Tucker that the connection he had felt growing between them was false, a human illusion of trust and friendship that was solely of his own making. He was her patient and important part of the crew but nothing more.
In hind sight he reasoned, that he had been rather foolish to assume that she had no one to turn to on the ship. There was always the Doc, Trip refused to allow him self to experience the remnant feeling of betrayal which always seem to creep up at the thought of Phlox, he had to keep reminding him self that he had done it for Tucker. For him!
And then there was the Captain, He and T'Pol had gotten along amazingly before the Xindi attacked Earth. And it was only logical, the Captain wasn't seeking Tucker for a friend anymore and he must be turning to someone to vent his frustrations, why not his first officer.
Tucker began to laugh, twisted and harsh to his ears. they were one hell of a messed up crew! He, T'Pol and Archer, were supposed to be Earths saviors, it seemed to Tucker that the best place for them all was a mental institution. Or maybe it was how things were supposed to be; maybe you had to be a little emotionally disturbed and mentally dysfunctional to survive in this Expanse. And how much longer would this mission take? How many more devastating events will he have to endure? He wasn't sure he could take much more and he was positive that the worst was yet to come.
Archer, Tucker sighed, his Captain, his best friend. Sim's executioner. and that is exactly what he had been. It was so hard for Tucker to know that if Sim had not accepted his fate he would have either been forced by phase riffle point or died alone in a shuttle pod!
The whole situation was nightmarish; being sentenced to death by the people you were closest to, the people that were supposed to be there to protect you. Eyes that had once held friendship trust and belonging now held animosity, doubt and exclusion. Tucker Shuddered at the memory, again he reminded him self that those events never happened to him, but to Sim, it didn't ease the pain of course, he ached to his core that Sim had to endure that.
It was then that his com sounded.
"Phlox to Commander Tucker!"
Trip cleared his throat before sauntering over to answer the com.
"Tucker Here! What can I do for you Doc?" None of the Tucker's pain was evident in his speech, he had gotten quite proficient at hiding his emotions, and not even T'Pol could sense them during all the skin to skin contact of neuro-pressure.
"I request you attendance in Sick Bay Commander, there is a matter of great importance!"
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I hope you don't find this too long winded!
I'd still love some reviews! Thank you for the ones I have already received!
Author: Kendra
Pairing: Trip/ T'Pol
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek and I don't make any money from this.
------------------------
I Sim
Trip Tucker saw no need to make it known that Sim's memories had survived him; it seemed to Trip that telling people he remembered every detail of Sim's life would only make dealing with the events that much harder for the crew. And so here he was, sat in his darkened quarters; the only light emanating from the streaking stars outside. It was the same every night since the funeral... usually by now he'd be getting ready for T'Pol's neuro- pressure session and she would some how manage to ease his pain, much as she had done for him. done for Sim before he had gone to sick bay to give up his short life.
He was under no illusions as to why she had kissed him then; it was not out of love but simple compassion, if there was one thing he had learned about T'Pol it was that behind her emotional barriers and Vulcan laws of etiquette she was a creature of amazing empathy. It was one of the many reasons he had stupidly fallen in love with her, but he was only human and he did stupid things. T'Pol would have done the same for any member of the crew in Sim's predicament.
It had been awkward for him seeing her after Sim's memories, of the kiss and his declaration of love, had become his own. It had been Sim with T'Pol then, but it might as well have been him, it sure felt like it had been.
It had been so awkward for him in fact that he had not noticed, for some time, that T'Pol had had her own troubles to deal with. Once he had begun to notice her lapses of concentration on the bridge he had felt guilt ridden that he had been so concerned with his own difficulties he never even considered what strains she had been through during this mission, he had never thought to wonder about how she was dealing with seeing that Vulcan ship that she had once served on, watching all of them, her crew mates and companions, descend into insanity while she had her own controls slowly ripped away from her.
Tucker had T'Pol; T'Pol had no one to turn to, no one that could ease her pain. And Tucker knew that she felt pain, most likely felt it more deeply than any Human could. His growing fondness for the Sub-Commander had led him to reading as much, about the Vulcan people, as he could find. It meant he knew all about their telepathic abilities, knew of their need for strong mental walls to block the emotional imprinting of other beings. Tucker had also heard of the out pouring of psychic energy felt, with immense pain, by the living when many Vulcan's die inexplicably much like they had on the Vulcan ship. He wondered if T'Pol had felt it, if she had indeed, he hoped that the pain wasn't as excruciating as it had been explained in the Vulcan database.
There was nothing he could do for her now, after last night, he had been waiting for the right time to broach the subject with her and entirely misjudged the whole situation, his timing, way off, he had offered her counsel and she had wholly refused. He had blamed himself at first for not going about the situation in the most logical of ways, calling her incompetent in her job was mostly likely not the best way to get past her defenses but after more thought and second guessing it was undoubtedly clear to Tucker that the connection he had felt growing between them was false, a human illusion of trust and friendship that was solely of his own making. He was her patient and important part of the crew but nothing more.
In hind sight he reasoned, that he had been rather foolish to assume that she had no one to turn to on the ship. There was always the Doc, Trip refused to allow him self to experience the remnant feeling of betrayal which always seem to creep up at the thought of Phlox, he had to keep reminding him self that he had done it for Tucker. For him!
And then there was the Captain, He and T'Pol had gotten along amazingly before the Xindi attacked Earth. And it was only logical, the Captain wasn't seeking Tucker for a friend anymore and he must be turning to someone to vent his frustrations, why not his first officer.
Tucker began to laugh, twisted and harsh to his ears. they were one hell of a messed up crew! He, T'Pol and Archer, were supposed to be Earths saviors, it seemed to Tucker that the best place for them all was a mental institution. Or maybe it was how things were supposed to be; maybe you had to be a little emotionally disturbed and mentally dysfunctional to survive in this Expanse. And how much longer would this mission take? How many more devastating events will he have to endure? He wasn't sure he could take much more and he was positive that the worst was yet to come.
Archer, Tucker sighed, his Captain, his best friend. Sim's executioner. and that is exactly what he had been. It was so hard for Tucker to know that if Sim had not accepted his fate he would have either been forced by phase riffle point or died alone in a shuttle pod!
The whole situation was nightmarish; being sentenced to death by the people you were closest to, the people that were supposed to be there to protect you. Eyes that had once held friendship trust and belonging now held animosity, doubt and exclusion. Tucker Shuddered at the memory, again he reminded him self that those events never happened to him, but to Sim, it didn't ease the pain of course, he ached to his core that Sim had to endure that.
It was then that his com sounded.
"Phlox to Commander Tucker!"
Trip cleared his throat before sauntering over to answer the com.
"Tucker Here! What can I do for you Doc?" None of the Tucker's pain was evident in his speech, he had gotten quite proficient at hiding his emotions, and not even T'Pol could sense them during all the skin to skin contact of neuro-pressure.
"I request you attendance in Sick Bay Commander, there is a matter of great importance!"
---------------
I hope you don't find this too long winded!
I'd still love some reviews! Thank you for the ones I have already received!