CHAPTER FOUR
*
The days that followed were almost as hard.
In a thousand subtle ways, cracks appeared in the once-solid group, now that Inuyasha was gone. Miroku spent most of his time alone, and seemed to be depressed enough that no girls were groped. He barely spoke to the others. Shippo cried on and off all the time, and rarely left Kaede's house.
Kagome spent most of her time alone, or with Sango and Shippo. The villagers took every opportunity to show their sympathy for her, but she only replied mechanically. It was like being behind a wall of water; she could see and hear, but it was hard to do. Things only seemed clear and quiet when she stayed by Inuyasha's grave.
Even more oddly, she had taken to wearing Inuyasha's fire-rat kimono over her school uniform. He had been taller and broader than she was, so it hung over her like an overlarge, overshort bathrobe. When Miroku had asked about her new tendency, she had merely said, "It's the easiest way to carry it around."
It was technically true, but it wasn't the whole truth. Wrapped up in the near-unbreakable kimono, Kagome felt... oddly protected. Inuyasha had given her his clothing when they were in serious danger. When she wore his kimono now, she felt as if somehow, he were still protecting her.
And she carried the Tetsusaiga wherever she went.
Miroku and Sango watched sadly as Kagome drifted through the following days. She only cried a few times, visited Inuyasha's grave at least a few times a day, and comforted Shippo.
"Do you think she'll go back to her own time now?" Sango said quietly as Kagome left the village.
"Not today," Miroku answered, resting his chin on his hand. "But I wouldn't be surprised if she vanished permanently someday soon. Inuyasha was what drew her to this era over and over. She stayed because she wanted to be near him. Now that he is gone, the few ties binding her here are gone as well."
Sango sat down beside him. "Do you still plan to fight Naraku?"
"I do. What about you?"
"I have my village to avenge. Of course I will."
"Then it's settled," Miroku said heavily. "Yet, I doubt we will succeed without Inuyasha."
*
One evening, about a week after her return to the feudal era, Kagome climbed a nearby hill and watched the sun set. The village was bathed in red light as the sun sank into the west. It looked like blood.
I'd give anything to have him back, she thought. Did I really say that? Of course I did.... I meant it, too.
She hugged the sword.
It was stupid to think about. It would take a full-blown resurrection to return Inuyasha to her -- and she wasn't gonna take that risk. Even if she would, she didn't know how. It was probably a demon thing, like that bug-eyed witch Urusue.
She had only heard of one person who was really resurrected, and that was Kikyo. And that had been a disaster from the get-go. Kikyo had been remade as a soul-stealing, ultra-powerful vengeful demon-priestess; Kagome's soul had been temporarily sucked from her body for that resurrection. And Kikyo had wanted Inuyasha to suffer and die, for a crime he had never committed. For some reason, Inuyasha had felt responsible for her.
Kikyo, she thought bitterly. Are you finally happy now? You wanted him dead, and now he is. You got what you wanted. And now everybody else is going to pay for it. Especially him... and he didn't deserve it.
There was so much he hadn't been able to deal with, so many ghosts left in his life. Would his soul even be able to rest in peace and move on, since he hadn't been able to kill Naraku? The thought brought more tears to Kagome's eyes.
Only a sliver of the sun still showed over the treetops. The sky was growing darker, and the moon was starting to fade in overhead.
Kagome knew that she should go back to the village, but she was too wrapped up in her thoughts to leave. She pulled the red kimono around herself and stared down at the shadowy grove where Inuyasha's grave was. If she tried hard enough, she could see the marker in the moonlight.
"It wasn't right," she murmured.
She thought about how he had looked the day she had left. He'd been sulking because of some little argument they had had; she didn't even remember what it had been about, it was so trivial. As she'd jumped down the well, he had been watching, with the sunlight on his silver hair, and one hand on the Tetsusaiga.
Kagome sat up straighter. "No... that couldn't... unless..." She thought rapidly about something she had heard months and months before -- before Shippo, Sango and Miroku had joined Inuyasha and herself in their travels. She couldn't remember the exact words... but still... it couldn't have been all lies, could it?
Maybe it is, Kagome thought, resting the sword across her knees. But it's the only chance I have. The only chance HE has...
TO BE CONTINUED
*
The days that followed were almost as hard.
In a thousand subtle ways, cracks appeared in the once-solid group, now that Inuyasha was gone. Miroku spent most of his time alone, and seemed to be depressed enough that no girls were groped. He barely spoke to the others. Shippo cried on and off all the time, and rarely left Kaede's house.
Kagome spent most of her time alone, or with Sango and Shippo. The villagers took every opportunity to show their sympathy for her, but she only replied mechanically. It was like being behind a wall of water; she could see and hear, but it was hard to do. Things only seemed clear and quiet when she stayed by Inuyasha's grave.
Even more oddly, she had taken to wearing Inuyasha's fire-rat kimono over her school uniform. He had been taller and broader than she was, so it hung over her like an overlarge, overshort bathrobe. When Miroku had asked about her new tendency, she had merely said, "It's the easiest way to carry it around."
It was technically true, but it wasn't the whole truth. Wrapped up in the near-unbreakable kimono, Kagome felt... oddly protected. Inuyasha had given her his clothing when they were in serious danger. When she wore his kimono now, she felt as if somehow, he were still protecting her.
And she carried the Tetsusaiga wherever she went.
Miroku and Sango watched sadly as Kagome drifted through the following days. She only cried a few times, visited Inuyasha's grave at least a few times a day, and comforted Shippo.
"Do you think she'll go back to her own time now?" Sango said quietly as Kagome left the village.
"Not today," Miroku answered, resting his chin on his hand. "But I wouldn't be surprised if she vanished permanently someday soon. Inuyasha was what drew her to this era over and over. She stayed because she wanted to be near him. Now that he is gone, the few ties binding her here are gone as well."
Sango sat down beside him. "Do you still plan to fight Naraku?"
"I do. What about you?"
"I have my village to avenge. Of course I will."
"Then it's settled," Miroku said heavily. "Yet, I doubt we will succeed without Inuyasha."
*
One evening, about a week after her return to the feudal era, Kagome climbed a nearby hill and watched the sun set. The village was bathed in red light as the sun sank into the west. It looked like blood.
I'd give anything to have him back, she thought. Did I really say that? Of course I did.... I meant it, too.
She hugged the sword.
It was stupid to think about. It would take a full-blown resurrection to return Inuyasha to her -- and she wasn't gonna take that risk. Even if she would, she didn't know how. It was probably a demon thing, like that bug-eyed witch Urusue.
She had only heard of one person who was really resurrected, and that was Kikyo. And that had been a disaster from the get-go. Kikyo had been remade as a soul-stealing, ultra-powerful vengeful demon-priestess; Kagome's soul had been temporarily sucked from her body for that resurrection. And Kikyo had wanted Inuyasha to suffer and die, for a crime he had never committed. For some reason, Inuyasha had felt responsible for her.
Kikyo, she thought bitterly. Are you finally happy now? You wanted him dead, and now he is. You got what you wanted. And now everybody else is going to pay for it. Especially him... and he didn't deserve it.
There was so much he hadn't been able to deal with, so many ghosts left in his life. Would his soul even be able to rest in peace and move on, since he hadn't been able to kill Naraku? The thought brought more tears to Kagome's eyes.
Only a sliver of the sun still showed over the treetops. The sky was growing darker, and the moon was starting to fade in overhead.
Kagome knew that she should go back to the village, but she was too wrapped up in her thoughts to leave. She pulled the red kimono around herself and stared down at the shadowy grove where Inuyasha's grave was. If she tried hard enough, she could see the marker in the moonlight.
"It wasn't right," she murmured.
She thought about how he had looked the day she had left. He'd been sulking because of some little argument they had had; she didn't even remember what it had been about, it was so trivial. As she'd jumped down the well, he had been watching, with the sunlight on his silver hair, and one hand on the Tetsusaiga.
Kagome sat up straighter. "No... that couldn't... unless..." She thought rapidly about something she had heard months and months before -- before Shippo, Sango and Miroku had joined Inuyasha and herself in their travels. She couldn't remember the exact words... but still... it couldn't have been all lies, could it?
Maybe it is, Kagome thought, resting the sword across her knees. But it's the only chance I have. The only chance HE has...
TO BE CONTINUED