I Can't Fight This Feeling
Disclaimer: I own nothing, except maybe a few OCs.
Chapter 4
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Saturday morning dawned bright and early, and Hermione found herself rising with the sun. She couldn't help herself; the moment she had awakened, an excited thrill had raced through her. She felt full of energy, full of life.
And she wasn't oblivious to the cause either. Today she was going to learn to play Quidditch. Today she was going to fly. And while she had disliked the idea at first, she had to admit it had its advantages. A certain red-haired, blue-eyed boy for example...
Yes, she couldn't deny it any longer. She liked Ron in a way she had never felt about anyone else. And today, she was going to get to spend practically a whole day with him. Alone.
She smiled to herself as she climbed out of bed, feeling a sharp tingle race up her spine at the thought of what lay ahead. "But what do I wear?" The words slipped from her lips without thought.
"Oh my God." Lavender Brown's head shot up from its pillow so fast that Hermione almost felt dizzy. "Did I just hear what I think I heard?" Lavender continued, her voice unnecessarily loud, causing several of the other girls to stir in their sleep. "Hermione Granger worried about clothes?"
Six other heads jerked up, and Lavender grinned, having gained the desired affect. Hermione suddenly found herself surrounded by her roommates, each who was eyeing her speculatively and then gazing critically at her small wardrobe.
"What's the occasion?" Parvati Patil asked as she rummaged through Hermione's robes, studying this one, discarding that one.
"I-" Hermione felt her face flame. "Ron's teaching me how to play Quidditch," she admitted reluctantly.
"I knew it," Lavender squealed loudly, an excited grin on her face. "Not the Quidditch part of course," she added hastily, seeing Hermione's look. "I don't spy on you or anything. I mean the Ron part." She glanced around at the other girls, knowing they'd back her up. "I always said those two would end up together, didn't I?" Several heads nodded in agreement, and Lavender was encouraged to continue. "Besides, I saw you two in the library yesterday."
Hermione felt her face grow even warmer under the intense, interested stares of her six other roommates. "Ron and I are not...together."
Lavender smirked. "Yeah, right. Whatever," she turned to look at the other girls. "He practically kissed her, right there in front of everyone-"
"Did not!" Hermione interrupted, angry that Lavender would exaggerate like that.
"Did too," the other girl replied smugly, winking knowingly at the rest of them.
"Did not." Hermione ground her teeth together, struggling to stay calm. If what Lavender was saying got around..."Let's just get back to the subject of clothes, shall we?" she said, hoping to draw their attention away from a certain topic.
It worked.
"Okay, so a day of flying with your boyfriend," Parvati intoned. "Let's see what we've got."
"He's not my boy-"
"We know!" her housemates chorused, humouring her even as they rolled there eyes and shook their heads. Who did Hermione think she was fooling? Anyone- any girl- with half a brain could take one look at her face and know instantly that she liked the boy. It was that obvious.
Hermione watched in silence as the girls sorted through her small collection of clothes, discarding most of them as soon as they saw them.
After a few minutes of this frenzied searching, Parvati Patil, fashion queen extraordinaire. drew back in disgust. "Honestly, Hermione, don't you have anything decent to wear?"
Hermione gave her an irritated look. "What about this one?" she asked, fingering a long black robe, much like her regular school ones except that the bottom was wavy and the the cuffs were rimmed with gold. It was her favorite.
Parvati rolled her eyes. "Hermione, it's ancient."
"I just got it last year!" Hermione protested.
"Precisely," Lavender cut in, agreeing with Parvati. "It's a new year, Granger, and you're going to spend a whole day with a boy we all know you like, no matter how much you deny it. You need something light, something colorful..."
"I've got it." Parvati snapped her fingers. "Not exactly light, but it's just the thing. Remember that dark purple robe-" she began excitedly to Lavender.
The other girl nodded enthusiastically, "Yeah, that's perfect!"
"You mean the one you got at the beginning of this year?" Rhia, another sixth year, asked Parvati. "It was beautiful..."
"That's the one. Now," Parvati turned to Hermione. "You wait right here, and I'll get it out for you." She rushed across the room to her own bed, then came hurrying back a scant second later, holding the most beautiful robe Hermione had ever seen in front of her. "It'll probably have to have a no-wrinkle charm worked on it first, it's been in that trunk for weeks."
Hermione stared at it, longing to put it on. But..."I can't Parvati. Thanks for offering it to me, it's gorgeous, but...I'm going to play Quidditch. I don't want to get it dirty."
Parvati's nose wrinkled in distaste, as if she hadn't thought about that. "You're right, I guess...but what else will you wear?"
"I suppose I'll be better off just wearing one of my old black robes." There was a collective sigh of disappointment at those words, and Hermione immediately felt bad for having gotten them all up for nothing. "I'm sorry, its just-"
Lavender shook her head. "Don't say another word. There will be another time, you'll need our help I think. You'll want that robe someday."
Hermione looked at the other girl, wondering if that was just a guess, or if Lavender really knew something she didn't. If Harry and Ron were to be believed, the girl was very good in Divination class..."Okay," she finally agreed, not knowing what else to say. "I guess I'll just get ready then..."
She began to change clothes, and the other girls drifted away, most of them going back to bed now that the excitement was over.
After changing, Hermione grabbed her broom and went quietly out the door, uncertain what she should do next. The events in the dormitory had taken no more than half an hour, so it was still very early. Should she wait in the common room for Ron to come downstairs, or...? She toyed with the idea she had in mind for a minute, debating with herself as she went down the stairs. Technically, girls weren't allowed in the boys' dormitory, but that had never stopped her before when she needed to speak with Ron and Harry.
That thought decided her, and she grinned impishly as she began the decent to the boys' rooms. Who would have thought she, Hermione Granger, would ever have had the nerve to sneak up to see Ron on a less-than-life-threatening mission? But here she was, following her sudden impulse, and fully enjoying it. Maybe Ron was right. Maybe she did need to get away from her books more...
The door to the sixth year boys' room was easy enough the get into, a simple "Alohomora" did the trick nicely. Then it was just a matter of tip-toeing to Ron's bed and waking him up...
"Pssst, Ron," she hissed, shaking him slightly. No response. "Ron," she shook him a bit harder. He stirred slightly, but didn't open his eyes. Losing patience, Hermione whispered sternly, "Ronald Arthur Weasley!"
That did the trick.
One of Ron's eyes cracked open, and he looked up, his eyes still blurred from sleep. "'Mione?" he asked through a yawn.
"Yes, it's me." She was smiling at him now. "I didn't want to wake the others. Come on, you're supposed to teach me how to fly today, remember?"
Ron grinned suddenly, memory racing back to him. "Oh yeah!"
"Shhh," Hermione pressed her finger to his lips instinctively. "Be quiet or you'll wake everyone."
Ron's eyes widened at the slight pressure of her finger on his lips, and he was instantly wide awake. "Okay," he nodded, to show he understood, and Hermione pulled her finger away. He missed the warmth and tenderness of it immediately.
Motioning for her to step away, Ron carefully eased himself out of bed, making as little noise as possible. It wasn't until he tried to meet Hermione's eyes and noticed her averted gaze that he realized he was still in his pajamas. Well, what did that matter, she'd seen him in them a hundred times before. But Ron felt his own surge of embarrassment and knew that this time, for some reason, it did matter.
"I'll wait outside for you," Hermione whispered softly, and Ron nodded his agreement.
He meet her on the staircase, broom in hand, about two minutes later, having changed himself as quickly as possible without making too much noise. Hermione looked slightly relieved to see him properly dressed, though she said nothing of the kind. "Let's go."
Ron followed her down the staircase, content to walk a step behind and just look at her. As they walked, he found himself remembering that look he had seen in her eye last night, and wondered if he had just imagined it. There certainly seemed to be no sign of it now in her direct, excited eyes.
Apparently she was looking forward to learning more about Quidditch. What could have changed her mind? Ron asked himself. One minute she was entirely set against the whole thing, the next she seemed to think it was the greatest event since Hogwarts: A History was published. Strange.
But he wasn't about to voice his thoughts aloud; he was much too conscious of the fact that anything he said about the matter could change her mood, and he didn't want to do that when she seemed so happy.
They reached the Grounds without a word being said, but now Ron was grinning just as much as Hermione had been the whole way. Apparently, happiness is contagious. He laughed softly as he thought of all the moves he would teach her, all the techniques that good Quidditch players use.
This was going to be fun. But first things first. He had to see how much about flying she already knew.
He led her to the middle of the Quidditch field, swung his leg over his broomstick, and shot into the air. "Come on," he called down to her. "I know you know this part."
Hermione grimaced. "You know I can't fly." Ron was getting more and more like Harry every day. They both made flying look so easy, so natural. Gathering her courage, Hermione straddled her own broom and rose smoothly from the ground.
Ron's eyes widened in faint surprise. "Can't fly huh, 'Mione? That looked pretty good to me."
Hermione grinned in spite of herself. "No, see, you don't get it. I've always been good at that part: going up." She paused for effect. "It's the going down and around part I have trouble with."
Ron's laughter was like music to her ears, and her smile widened.
Ron just looked at her, chuckling to himself. Hermione didn't crack jokes very much. She was usually much too serious. She should lighten up more often. "Okay, then we'll work on that first." He flew closer to her, bringing his broom up beside hers. "Now, follow me."
He started forward, and Hermione tried to follow him, but her broom just jerked a little, then settled again. "I can't do it, Ron," she said, a defeated tone in her voice. How many times had she tried this before, failing horribly each time? She should have known that today wouldn't be any different.
Ron glanced behind him, surprised to see that Hermione wasn't kidding. She really couldn't seem to get the broom to move...He flew back to her side again. "Okay, let's try this again. To get the broom to move forward, you have to lean-"
"I know the theory, Ron," Hermione snapped impatiently, "I'm not stupid. It just doesn't work for me, that's all. The book says-"
Ron held up his hands. "Whoa, stop, hold it right there. No theory today, Hermione. Flying isn't something you can learn from a book, as you've obviously discovered for yourself. It's purely a trial-and-error activity, okay?"
Hermione nodded, wishing she hadn't snapped at him. It was just so frustrating!
"Today," Ron continued, "we're going to throw theory out the window. I don't want to hear one teeny tiny sentence that begins with the 'the book says', got it?"
Hermione tried to keep a straight face, but knew she was failing miserably. "Aye, aye, Sir," she teased, giving into the grin.
Ron smiled back, a light-hearted, encouraging smile that made Hermione feel as though she really could fly, with or without a broom. Or maybe float was a better word...
"Right. So, like I said, to go forward, you have to lean with the broom, like this." He demonstrated, and Hermione watched intently, determined to learn quickly.
After a second, he flew back around to her side. "You're turn."
Hermione nodded, her face grim now, and tried to do as he'd said. But again, the broom simply jerked.
Ron's head tilted to the side, watching her intently. "Try it again."
She did, but with the same result. She looked up reluctantly, certain she would see disappointment in Ron's gaze, but when there eyes met, he seemed to be shaking with barely contained laughter. "What?" she asked, feeling rather idiotic.
Ron shook his head, not able to answer until the laughter left him. "I know what you're problem is."
"You do?"
"Umhmm. You're so scared of going down, that when you lean forward, you immediately jerk the broom back up again." He smiled at her, not bothering to disguise his amusement. "You can't do that. Pulling the broom back up stops you. That's why you haven't been able to do anything."
"Oh," Hermione said in a small voice. Now she really felt stupid.
Seeing her look, Ron smiled at her encouragingly. "But it's okay. Just remember to let the broom go. I know that it seems like you're going to go crashing down towards the ground when you first start moving forward, but once it gets going the broom straightens up on it own. Watch." He flew forward slowly, illustrating his point. "See?"
"I think so," Hermione nodded.
"Good. Now, let's try it again, shall we? I'll even fly below you to catch you if you want," he said, only half-joking. If Hermione felt safer that way, he'd do it in a heartbeat.
"N-no," Hermione refused. "That's okay. I'll do this myself."
Ron couldn't help but admire her courage. For someone who insisted that she hated flying, and was obviously very scared, she was very determined.
Hermione closed her eyes, opened them, and breathed deeply. Then, she leaned forward carefully. I'm not going to fall, I'm not going to fall, I'm not going to-
And she didn't. It was exactly how Ron had said it would be. The broom dipped down at first, but then straightened back up once the forward momentum was going. She clutched the broom so tightly her knuckles turned white, but she was grinning ecstatically. I did it. I did it!
She kept on flying, too wrapped up in her own thoughts to notice that she was reaching the end of the field, and that now she was past it, heading on out towards the Forbidden Forest.
Only the sound of Ron's voice as he raced to catch up with her caught her attention. "Stop, Hermione, stop."
She glanced back, realizing with a feeling of distant terror how far she'd come. And she couldn't stop, she didn't know how...Ron had told her, she knew he had, but the feeling of horror was overwhelming; it clouded her mind and refused to let her think clearly. The only thing she could imagine was that she was just going to keep going and going, until the Forbidden Forest was the only thing in sight below her, until Hogwarts disappeared and she was all alone...
Then Ron was there, yelling at her to stop, but she still couldn't remember how. Her eyes were squeezed tightly shut and she gripped the broom harder than ever.
And then suddenly, the broom jerked. I'm going to die.
But she didn't, she didn't even fall off, because suddenly Ron's arm was around her waist, holding her tightly, securely, and she realized that the forward movement had stopped, and that she hung motionless in the air. She sobbed in relief then, head buried in Ron's shoulder, breaths coming in great shuddering gasps.
Ron held her close, letting her cry. His face had gone a chalky white color, and he was having trouble breathing himself. His heart was racing so fast he didn't think it would ever slow down, and his palms were slick with sweat.
God, why hadn't he been more careful? He had thought that Hermione would realize how to stop, had thought that she was capable of it. And she was, he knew; when she wasn't paralyzed with fear. He should have stayed close, should have flown right beside her the whole way so that she wouldn't have frozen.
Hermione's sobs were fading, and though she was still shaking slightly, she raised her head from Ron's chest enough to look up at him. "S-sorry," she stammered, a wave of shame coming over her now that she was thinking clearly again. She'd just cried in his arms, like a little baby. What must he think of her now?
"Shh," Ron soothed, his voice calm and comforting. "It's alright now, I've got you. You're safe."
Hermione nodded, and allowed herself to rest on his shoulder again. He was right. The feeling of security, or safety, surrounded her like a warm blanket, and she found herself wishing they could stay there, just like this, for the rest of there lives. But that was crazy of course, pure nonsense...
She tried to pull away, but found she couldn't. Ron's arm was locked around her like a vice, and she could only sit there, staring at him.
The look on his face had her shaking again, trembling, but this time, it wasn't from fear. At least, it wasn't from the I'm-going-to-die fear. No, this kind of fear was much more subtle, but just as instinctive.
Oh God, he's going to kiss me...
Their eyes met, and Ron hesitated. Do you want me to? his eyes seemed to ask.
Her own reply was quick and too the point. She leaned forward, closing the space between them until there was no distance anymore, or time either. As their lips met for the very first time, the world around them stilled, quieted, and faded into the background. It was as if a great mist had suddenly sprung up around them, cloaking all the world in its thick cape. Everything except them, that was.
And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars forever
He kissed her gently, oh so gently, not even trying to go deeper, as if he was afraid that that would ruin the sweetness of the moment. Hermione responded in kind, her head tilting complacently to one side and her eyes closing in pleasure. So this was what it felt like to be kissed...
Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crashing through the door
Baby I can't fight this feeling anymore
Ron pulled away at the last possible moment, leaving them both gasping for breath. They were still up in the air, Hermione realized then, having forgotten that little fact in the intensity of the moment. She felt the fear return to her.
"Can we- "
"Go down now?" Ron finished for her, seeing the look on her face and knowing what she wanted.
Hermione nodded, relieved that he seemed so ready to comply.
"Sure," Ron answered. Then, "Do you want to do it yourself, or do you want me to guide you down slowly?"
Hermione looked at him, feeling suddenly shy. "Would you?"
Ron nodded vigorously. Of course he would, how could he not...? His mind raced as he took hold of her broom and guided her gently back to the Quidditch Pitch and the ground. A rush of images and emotions coursed through him, and as he shot a glance at the girl next to him, who was gazing anywhere but in his direction, Ron felt his blood grow warm all over again.
Their feet touched the ground, and Ron helped Hermione off her broom, holding her hand steadily. As soon as she was safely back on solid earth, he jumped down beside her, and pulled her into his arms.
He felt her tense, and wondered immediately if that had been the wrong thing to do. Then she relaxed, melting into him like butter when it's set out in the sun. He did nothing, simply held her there for a long moment, wondering if he dare kiss her again.
Why don't you just ask her?
"Can I kiss you again, 'Mione?" he found himself asking as he tilted her chin up so that she was forced to look at him.
Hermione felt a wave of impishness rush through her when she realized that not only did Ron want to kiss her again, he thought he needed to ask her permission first! "I don't know, Ron..." she said, pretending to have to consider it.
"Please?" his voice was so soft the Hermione barely heard it.
"Well, in that case, it's alright I gue-"
She didn't even get to finish her sentence because as soon as Ron heard the word 'alright' he brought his lips crashing down on hers with such force Hermione pulled back, startled.
Instantly, Ron froze, his eyes wide. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. I mean, I shouldn't have-"
Hermione shook her head, relaxing again, and immediately regretted her jumpiness. "No, don't apologize, it wasn't you. I was just startled, that's all."
"Oh," Ron breathed, his face flooding with relief. Then he grinned at her sheepishly. "Can I try that again?"
"Hmm," Hermione considered, toying with him. "Maybe later."
Ron's face fell, and Hermione was never so reminded of a puppy who'd lost his bone. "Oh. Alright then..."
"For now, it's breakfast time," Hermione reminded him.
Ron's face lightened. "Hey, you're right. And I'm starving."
He smiled at her then, and Hermione had never felt more strongly that everything was right in the world. "Shall we go then?"
"Lets," Ron said, picking up both of their brooms, obviously intending to carry hers for her.
But Hermione shook her head. "Let me," she told him, taking her broom in one hand. Then, with the other, she grabbed his free hand, feeling a delicious tingle shoot up her spine as his large, warm fingers settled around hers. "Now we can go," she said with a smile, feeling perfectly content.
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A/N: That's it for a couple more days! Thanks to all my wonderful reviewers from the last chapter:
andrea912004;Eiraugcam Suruaseht (did this chapter answer your question? lol);cat-chan (thank you for the many compliments, they're much appreciated. And the story is going to be seven chapters long. By no means an epic, but I didn't plan for it to be.);kneh13(oh, you're going to review this story for me too! Thanks bunches!);Audrey;Line-from Denmark(two days isn't really that long, is it? *grins*);Snowdevil44s; and ThinkingOfaName
You're all fantastic! Keep reviewing please!