FICLET: Falling Together (CJ/Josh - Sequel to "Falling Apart, and Falling
Fast")
AUTHOR: Kansas J. Miller
RATING: NC-17
SPOILERS: None really, just things from the previous ficlet.
SUMMARY: "You have no idea what I feel, who I love, or what I want.not if
you think it's Donna."
NOTE: Thanks for the feedback on the first part of this - it was so
voluminous and kind - and the many requests for sequels sent me back to my
computer.
**
CJ sighed as she rolled over once again. She couldn't stop tossing and turning, and despite the fact that it was a Friday night, there was nothing relaxed about it. Untangling the sheets from around her long legs, CJ tried once more to make herself comfortable in the bed, wishing she could pinpoint the cause of her sleeplessness. It was driving her crazy, and all at once, as she glanced over at his still form, CJ was filled with jealousy.
But of course Josh was asleep, CJ realized with a roll of her eyes. She had yet to meet a man who didn't drop off the instant the sex was over. As she settled back down against the pillows and pulled the sheets back over her bare skin, CJ made sure her elbow "accidentally" found it's way into Josh's back; two more times, and he was shifting towards her.
"What the hell is your problem?" Josh asked in a husky, low and amused voice, his arm snaking around CJ's waist. Soon his lips were against the back of her neck, his head resting against her hair.
"I don't have a problem," CJ murmured, wishing she could feel as sleepy as Josh sounded.
Kissing her neck again, Josh pulled CJ's naked back closer against his bare chest. "You elbowed me. I've slept in the same bed with you enough times to know what that means."
CJ sighed softly, twisting around so that she could be face to face with Josh. Lying eye to eye with her sent Josh's heart fluttering, and suddenly he was wide awake and pulling CJ closer. "What's wrong?" he asked in a whisper, brushing his lips briefly against hers.
CJ slipped her arms over Josh's shoulder as their legs somehow tangled together. Liking the feeling of his hands on her hips, CJ hummed as their groins made intimate contact. "I saw Donna tonight when I went back to get your coat."
Josh moved his lips down CJ's neck, kissing slowly and softly. "Yeah?"
"I think I upset her when I told her that you were here with me," CJ responded, aware of Josh's growing erection.
Josh's hands had begun to wander over CJ's body, and they stopped suddenly at the swell of her breast. Pulling his head back a bit to see her eyes, Josh raised a brow. "Why would she be upset? She knows that you and I."
CJ suddenly sat up, breaking the arousing contact their bodies had been engaged in. "She thinks that you and I use each other for sex when it's convenient or when one of us needs it. She thinks what everyone else thinks when they look and us."
Josh was startled by the hurt in CJ's voice. He moved slowly closer to her, tentatively sliding his hand over CJ's smooth back. When it was clear that she was not going to pull away again, Josh tightened his arm around her shoulders. "It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks. They don't know us, CJ, and I'm surprised that it bothers you."
"Donna's in love with you, Josh. I told her that you loved her, too," CJ said quietly, staring down at her bare knees as she hugged them to her body.
Josh sat back, taking his arms away from CJ's back. They were silent for a moment, the traffic on the street the only noise filtering into the darkness of the bedroom. Josh finally cleared his throat, watching CJ as he spoke. "I don't love her, CJ. I don't! I know what everyone thinks about that, too, but they're just as wrong as they are about you and me. I don't understand why you would tell her that, CJ, why you would put me in that position!"
CJ felt the mattress dip, and soon Josh was pacing the room, his anger palpable. She watched him from the bed for a moment, biding her time before she got up and joined him in the middle of the room. "I call it like I see it, Josh, that's all," she offered in a neutral tone, folding her arms over her naked breasts.
The room was dark, but light filtering through the blinds sent shadows over her face. Before he could even think, Josh grabbed CJ and pulled her body close, leading them back over to the bed, their mouths melting together with heat. Pushing her back down onto the mattress, and crawling over her body, Josh slid his arms possessively under and around her. Punctuating their hot, heavy, and drugging kisses with his words, Josh struggled with his feelings. "You don't see anything, CJ.you have no idea, no idea at all."
"I have no idea?" She murmured, pulling his mouth back to hers, moaning as she felt his knee slip between hers to separate her legs.
Josh raised himself up over CJ, positioning his erection at her entrance. Looking into her eyes with his emotional pair, he slid his hands down to pull her ass upwards, completing their connection. With twin groans, they stopped to savor the feeling, and Josh sighed against CJ's neck. "You have no idea what I feel, who I love, or what I want.not if you think it's Donna."
CJ pushed against Josh, urging him to move inside of her. With her arms bracing against Josh's muscled shoulders, and the fire growing to unbearable levels in her center, CJ could no longer focus on his words. "Josh, Josh, Josh.you can love whoever you want, but right now, you just need to move!"
Josh stared into CJ's blue eyes, staying completely still as he searched them. "This is important to me. You're important to me. Incredibly so. I can't believe you don't know that."
"What are you saying?" she gasped, her clitoris sparking with pleasure as Josh began to slowly move his hips.
"It's you, CJ, it's always been you," Josh groaned, suddenly rolling them over until CJ was on top. Their fingers instinctively threaded together as she began to ride him, and soon they were moaning in unison. Frantically their friction grew until an explosion was just the start.
Lying together, tangled and sweaty, Josh held CJ's body tightly against his, not willing to let her go even an inch. They were silent for a moment, catching their breaths and their thoughts. CJ spoke first. "If it's always been me, why are we this way?"
Josh smoothed CJ's hair, pressing a kiss to her temple. He sighed, not sure how to answer her. He responded with questions of his own. "Are we scared to be more? Do you think we'd be lying to each other? Do you feel like I'm lying to you now?"
"I don't feel like you're lying to me, Josh," CJ whispered, subconsciously tracing the scar on his chest with her index finger. "I trust you with everything. You're my best friend."
"And you are mine," Josh said matter-of-factly. He sighed, catching CJ's gaze. "That first time.when we fell together.didn't it feel perfect to you, too?"
CJ felt tears spring to her eyes. She had never wanted to reveal those feelings to Josh, because when she relived them, she was always so sure he had not felt the same thing. "Oh, Josh, you couldn't even know."
He smiled into the dark, satisfied with her truth. "I do know. It feels that way every single time, CJ."
CJ smirked, hoping she didn't sound too bitter. "Then why do you suppose days and days go by in between? I've stopped wondering if it will be another three weeks before you're here again. I already know."
Josh squeezed CJ's shoulder and put his lips softly to hers. They parted slowly. "I think we can change that, CJ. I think we should."
"Let's just take it easy, Josh.we're too old to be this stupid," CJ responded, closing her eyes. She was suddenly feeling very sleepy.
Josh noticed her drooping eyes and decided to drop the conversation. They'd said enough for one night. He had revealed enough. "Goodnight, Claudia Jean."
CJ snuggled closer to Josh, warm in the comfort of his arms. He had revealed so much to her tonight, and as she dropped off to sleep, CJ wondered where they were going. *
**
CJ sighed as she rolled over once again. She couldn't stop tossing and turning, and despite the fact that it was a Friday night, there was nothing relaxed about it. Untangling the sheets from around her long legs, CJ tried once more to make herself comfortable in the bed, wishing she could pinpoint the cause of her sleeplessness. It was driving her crazy, and all at once, as she glanced over at his still form, CJ was filled with jealousy.
But of course Josh was asleep, CJ realized with a roll of her eyes. She had yet to meet a man who didn't drop off the instant the sex was over. As she settled back down against the pillows and pulled the sheets back over her bare skin, CJ made sure her elbow "accidentally" found it's way into Josh's back; two more times, and he was shifting towards her.
"What the hell is your problem?" Josh asked in a husky, low and amused voice, his arm snaking around CJ's waist. Soon his lips were against the back of her neck, his head resting against her hair.
"I don't have a problem," CJ murmured, wishing she could feel as sleepy as Josh sounded.
Kissing her neck again, Josh pulled CJ's naked back closer against his bare chest. "You elbowed me. I've slept in the same bed with you enough times to know what that means."
CJ sighed softly, twisting around so that she could be face to face with Josh. Lying eye to eye with her sent Josh's heart fluttering, and suddenly he was wide awake and pulling CJ closer. "What's wrong?" he asked in a whisper, brushing his lips briefly against hers.
CJ slipped her arms over Josh's shoulder as their legs somehow tangled together. Liking the feeling of his hands on her hips, CJ hummed as their groins made intimate contact. "I saw Donna tonight when I went back to get your coat."
Josh moved his lips down CJ's neck, kissing slowly and softly. "Yeah?"
"I think I upset her when I told her that you were here with me," CJ responded, aware of Josh's growing erection.
Josh's hands had begun to wander over CJ's body, and they stopped suddenly at the swell of her breast. Pulling his head back a bit to see her eyes, Josh raised a brow. "Why would she be upset? She knows that you and I."
CJ suddenly sat up, breaking the arousing contact their bodies had been engaged in. "She thinks that you and I use each other for sex when it's convenient or when one of us needs it. She thinks what everyone else thinks when they look and us."
Josh was startled by the hurt in CJ's voice. He moved slowly closer to her, tentatively sliding his hand over CJ's smooth back. When it was clear that she was not going to pull away again, Josh tightened his arm around her shoulders. "It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks. They don't know us, CJ, and I'm surprised that it bothers you."
"Donna's in love with you, Josh. I told her that you loved her, too," CJ said quietly, staring down at her bare knees as she hugged them to her body.
Josh sat back, taking his arms away from CJ's back. They were silent for a moment, the traffic on the street the only noise filtering into the darkness of the bedroom. Josh finally cleared his throat, watching CJ as he spoke. "I don't love her, CJ. I don't! I know what everyone thinks about that, too, but they're just as wrong as they are about you and me. I don't understand why you would tell her that, CJ, why you would put me in that position!"
CJ felt the mattress dip, and soon Josh was pacing the room, his anger palpable. She watched him from the bed for a moment, biding her time before she got up and joined him in the middle of the room. "I call it like I see it, Josh, that's all," she offered in a neutral tone, folding her arms over her naked breasts.
The room was dark, but light filtering through the blinds sent shadows over her face. Before he could even think, Josh grabbed CJ and pulled her body close, leading them back over to the bed, their mouths melting together with heat. Pushing her back down onto the mattress, and crawling over her body, Josh slid his arms possessively under and around her. Punctuating their hot, heavy, and drugging kisses with his words, Josh struggled with his feelings. "You don't see anything, CJ.you have no idea, no idea at all."
"I have no idea?" She murmured, pulling his mouth back to hers, moaning as she felt his knee slip between hers to separate her legs.
Josh raised himself up over CJ, positioning his erection at her entrance. Looking into her eyes with his emotional pair, he slid his hands down to pull her ass upwards, completing their connection. With twin groans, they stopped to savor the feeling, and Josh sighed against CJ's neck. "You have no idea what I feel, who I love, or what I want.not if you think it's Donna."
CJ pushed against Josh, urging him to move inside of her. With her arms bracing against Josh's muscled shoulders, and the fire growing to unbearable levels in her center, CJ could no longer focus on his words. "Josh, Josh, Josh.you can love whoever you want, but right now, you just need to move!"
Josh stared into CJ's blue eyes, staying completely still as he searched them. "This is important to me. You're important to me. Incredibly so. I can't believe you don't know that."
"What are you saying?" she gasped, her clitoris sparking with pleasure as Josh began to slowly move his hips.
"It's you, CJ, it's always been you," Josh groaned, suddenly rolling them over until CJ was on top. Their fingers instinctively threaded together as she began to ride him, and soon they were moaning in unison. Frantically their friction grew until an explosion was just the start.
Lying together, tangled and sweaty, Josh held CJ's body tightly against his, not willing to let her go even an inch. They were silent for a moment, catching their breaths and their thoughts. CJ spoke first. "If it's always been me, why are we this way?"
Josh smoothed CJ's hair, pressing a kiss to her temple. He sighed, not sure how to answer her. He responded with questions of his own. "Are we scared to be more? Do you think we'd be lying to each other? Do you feel like I'm lying to you now?"
"I don't feel like you're lying to me, Josh," CJ whispered, subconsciously tracing the scar on his chest with her index finger. "I trust you with everything. You're my best friend."
"And you are mine," Josh said matter-of-factly. He sighed, catching CJ's gaze. "That first time.when we fell together.didn't it feel perfect to you, too?"
CJ felt tears spring to her eyes. She had never wanted to reveal those feelings to Josh, because when she relived them, she was always so sure he had not felt the same thing. "Oh, Josh, you couldn't even know."
He smiled into the dark, satisfied with her truth. "I do know. It feels that way every single time, CJ."
CJ smirked, hoping she didn't sound too bitter. "Then why do you suppose days and days go by in between? I've stopped wondering if it will be another three weeks before you're here again. I already know."
Josh squeezed CJ's shoulder and put his lips softly to hers. They parted slowly. "I think we can change that, CJ. I think we should."
"Let's just take it easy, Josh.we're too old to be this stupid," CJ responded, closing her eyes. She was suddenly feeling very sleepy.
Josh noticed her drooping eyes and decided to drop the conversation. They'd said enough for one night. He had revealed enough. "Goodnight, Claudia Jean."
CJ snuggled closer to Josh, warm in the comfort of his arms. He had revealed so much to her tonight, and as she dropped off to sleep, CJ wondered where they were going. *