Title: Eternal Snow
by dytia

Disclaimers: I don't own Hana Yori Dango.. you know the great mangaka that deserved that honour.

This is a one-shot Christmas song-fic I thought up while writing my other fic, Changing Fates. Currently, resting from the other fic for a little while. Need time to recharge. In the meantime enjoy this fic. Based on latest Margaret chapters though it was set much more further in the future (four years to be exact). If you have not read the chapters or the summaries or don't want to read any spoilers.. turn back now.

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Still here?! Oh well.. Let's set the stage. After reading the part Doumyouji decided to go to New York, I was thinking what will Makino do? Will she marry him or stay behind? This is what I think might happen, taking place on one wintry Christmas night, four years after the current Margaret story chapter.

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Snow were falling on Tokyo, slowly turning the city like a fairytale like winter palace. The city workers worked to clear the piles of snow from the streets. Shopping malls were crowded with people doing their last minute Christmas shopping. Shop windows decorated with lush evergreen, glittering lights, silver tinsel and gold decorative balls. Deep in the Tokyo Underground, a brown haired girl was running through the ocean of bustling Tokyo citizens, shoving other people as she rushed through the ticket checkpoint, other people cursing her as she jumped in front of the queue while nodding profusely, apologizing all the way. Makino Tsukushi, aged 21, was late for work.

As she arrived at the shop, she was severely scolded by the owner. " This is the tenth time you came late."
" Sumimasen. My classes ended really late and I missed the train because of the many people."
" Excuses.. excuses... Do you really want to be fired?"
" No.. Kaibutsu-san.. I mean Kaibahara-san... I really do need the money. Please let me keep this job." Kaibahara was not impressed by her persuasion, " Next mistake, I'll really fire you. But today since it's Christmas time we need all the waitress we can get. Now, go do your job."
" Yes," she bowed. After he was gone, she let out a loud sigh of relief.

" Makino-senpai, you are really lucky tonight," said Amamiya Yukino, another waitress in the fancy Italian restaurant that Makino worked for the last four months. Yukino was a year younger than Makino but unlike Makino, she worked full time.
Makino smiled, " Well, he always like that but that man's heart is actually good. Yosh, tonight looked very busy isn't it."
" Yes, Christmas time after all. Many couples and families come to have dinner here. After all, isn't Christmas is time for the ones you loved." She sighed, " Don't I wish I have a boyfriend to spend Christmas with?"
" Amamiya-san, don't give up yet. A cute girl like you alone on Christmas night? Impossible."
" Ara.. Makino-senpai's different.."
" Eh.."
" Oh.. How about that guy who picked you up last time? His name's Hanazawa Rui isn't it?"
Makino turned red. " He's not my boyfriend. we're just good friends."
" Isn't that the same. I mean most friendships always end up into love.. and I heard.."
" Amamiya.. Makino.. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!!! Go serve the customers.." Both froze before they shouted in unison, " Yess!!!!!!!"

As Makino went out carrying the order to the tables, her head was spinning with thoughts. She just called her mom saying she's not coming home for Christmas dinner because she has another part time job on that day. (Makino lived away from her family home to be nearer to her college). Hanazawa Rui already said that he was spending Christmas time with his family. He invited Makino to come with him, but she declined. The others told her that they already had plans for the night. (But if she told them she was alone for Christmas, they all including Rui surely would ditch all of their plans to be with her.)

Hanazawa Rui.. He never broke his promise to always stay beside me. He always gave me strength every time I need it. How could I even go on without him?

It was Hanazawa's strength that helped her through the last four years. After she left Eitoku, she got herself a place in Eitoku university (at Mama's insistence) with scholarship but it barely covered the Tokyo's high cost living and tuition fees. Thus, Makino took as many part time jobs she could find to support her way through. Her parents no longer could support her as they have to pay for Susumu's high schooling. To her, it was okay though.

She remembered her friends arguing with each other, telling her that they could help her with the money. Yet, Makino did not believe in using friends as her monetary means. All of them, Kazuya, Sojirou, Akira and Rui also ended up in Eitoku university along with her other classmates. Shigeru was in Paris studying fashion design. But she frequently returned to Tokyo and they were still best of friends.

Friends.. Yes.. All of my friends always staying beside me lending me their strength. Even through the darkest time, they were there for me.

Taking an order from a couple, she patiently listed the special menu sets but the couple was as if not noticing her standing there. They were busy arguing with each other.

" I told you, I'll pay for dinner. Stop being stubborn"
" Why you... take that back, dumb ass. I told you I don't want to eat in expensive restaurants like this. Why don't you spend your money on something beneficial for a change?"
" I just want to make this special for you."
" Special does not mean expensive!"

" Ano.. sorry for interrupting... But may I take your order now?" In unison, the girl yelled " No!" The guy shouted, " Yes.." And they started to argue again. Just like me and Doumyouji back then.

" Urusei!!!" Makino yelled back at them. The whole restaurant suddenly became silent. All eyes was on her. Makino took a deep breath and as calm as possible, she slowly said. " If you want to argue, I suggest you take it outside. There are people here to come and eat and all of you are embarrassing yourselves arguing in a public place."
" She started it." The girl stuck out her tongue. Makino paid no attention to their childish behavior.
" Christmas is a special time for lovers. The two of you should not spend it arguing. At least treasure the time you have together. You might not have it back again." Makino blinked her eyes, trying to hold back the tears in her eyes. The couple gaped at her, surprised by her words.

" Sorry.. I .. will be back. This is the menu and when you finally decided, call me back." Makino hurried towards the kitchen. All alone in the store room, the tears started to flow.

Doumyouji.. I miss you so much.

Flash back:
Four years ago.. Doumyouji's father collapsed and Doumyouji decided to leave for New York to take his rightful place as Doumyouji family heir. He asked for Makino's hands, telling her that he wants her to come with him. He told her that his time was running out. He did not want to leave but he knows that he should not run away from his responsibility.

And I said no.

Back to the present, Makino could hear someone clapping. She hastily wiped away her tears and said, " Boss.. I am sorry. I know I should not yelled at a customer but.."
" I already settled that with your boss. He's not angry with you." Makino looked up in surprise.

" Rui?! Why are you here?"
" I came to check up on you. And who expected I managed to come in time to hear your inspiring speech." Rui smiled. His glassy eyes, tenderly looking at her, full with understanding.

Makino smiled back, " I guess I am not as strong as I had thought.." She stepped towards Rui, looking very uncertain. "Rui, could you lend your shoulder for me one more time. I think I really need it."

Rui nodded. Makino leaned against his shoulders as she cried as much as she can. It has been a long four years since the last time she cried. The last time was that fateful morning when she rejected Doumyouji's proposal.

Flash back:
That night she could not sleep. Doumyouji were going next morning and she still had not given him her answer. She was scared of leaving her family and friends behind. Mama and Papa told her to go and accept it (it's a dream come true!!!). She trusted Doumyouji would protect her. That time in New York and that sad days when she thought she won't see Doumyouji again, she didn't want to relive that ever again. But marriage.

I am just a high school girl. Marriage is a big responsibility.

But she knew Doumyouji meant it when he asked her to marry him. " If you love me, you'll marry me," she remembered his words.

When the sun finally came out, Makino came to a decision. A painful decision but she realized that was the best thing she could do.

Doumyouji, forgive me. It was not because I do not love you. It was because I love you too much.

Back to the present.
It's eleven o'clock. Rui made her boss close the restaurant earlier. They were walking through the street, although it was near midnight. Couples openly holding hands, some even dared to kiss in the open. Snow was piling up on the pavement. It got so slippery that Makino almost fell back if not for Rui's fast reflex, catching her in the nick of time.

" I'm sorry, Rui. Always troubling you."
" I never thought of you as trouble." Makino chuckled.
" This coming from a guy who told me that he didn't want to trouble himself with other people's." He shrugged. " I guessed I have changed." Suddenly, Makino stopped. Her eyes was fixed on the television set in the shop window near by.

Rui glanced towards the direction she was watching. Startled, he saw Doumyouji Tsukasa, looking all distinguished in an Armani suit, looking every bit like the business empire heir he was.

" I guessed you were not the only one who changed." He nodded.
" Knowing his spoiled behavior, who would expect him to willingly take his place in the Doumyouji empire." Looking at Makino, " You missed him a lot, isn't it?"
She looked away, " Perhaps the loneliness were killing me."
" He called and sent letters, didn't he?"
" He's busy lately, trying to clinch some huge deal in his mother's place. He would be in Washington all Christmas."

Then, she forced herself to smile," Enough with me. Christmas is not a time to be sad." Beaming at Rui, " Since you're free tonight, come to my place. I know it's late and you already had dinner. I could make a stew for supper and we could talk all night... " Then she stopped. Her cheeks felt hot. " Ano.. I mean.. it's okay if you don't want to. I mean.." Rui stopped her.
" I like that very much.. After all, it's dangerous to let a girl alone in the city Christmas night."

Thank you Rui

* * * * *

" Where is it...? I knew it was in here somewhere.." Makino rummaged through her bag a few times but still could not find her keys. " Makino, did you left it in the restaurant, at the uni?"
" No... I did not even take it out of my bag."
" Let me try to push it open." Rui pushed and twisted the doorknob. To his surprise, it gave out a loud click. Makino almost jumped in astonishment.
" Did you lock the door this morning?" She nodded. " I am sure of it. Could it be? I heard that there was a pervert in the area stealing women's underwear." Rui's eyes widened in anxiety.

As they cautiously enter the dark apartment, both ready to strike any intruder, Makino saw a shadow of a movement. In an instant, she landed a flying karate super kick at that person. She landed right on top of that person. " You pervert. Take this and this and this.." she yelled as she punched the intruder with all her might repeatedly.

" Ouch.. Dame da.. Tsukushi-chan.." Wait.. that sounded familiar. Suddenly, someone switched on the lights. Looking down at the intruder, in the bright lights, Makino cried in horror. " Kazuya-kun!!!!!!!!"
Looking around, she saw Rui staring in stunned silence towards Akira, Sojirou and Shigeru. Kazuya, obviously half unconscious managed to say, " Merry Christmas.. Tsukushi-chan..." Then he passed out.

After everything settled down, Shigeru explained that she just returned from Paris the day before and bumped into Akira and Sojirou at a party. " The party was really boring. Not many girls.." complained Sojirou.
" Not many 30-above ladies too..." Shigeru sighed, " Since I haven't seen Tsukushi for a long time, I wanted to throw a surprise party for her so I dragged them along with me."
" How about Kazuya? What he got to do with this.."
" well, we needed to get into your house but we did not have the keys so we got Kazuya to steal it from you during class today."
" You stole my keys?!!!"
" It's really hard to get Kazuya to do it. But he was the only one with same classes as you and he always sat next to you. You could not really blame him."

Makino sighed. " Oh I am not mad but I felt sorry for him." Akira shook Kazuya vigorously but he did not move. " Well, at least he still breathing."
" Hey.. what's with the glum looks?! I thought we here to P.A.R.T.Y?!"
" Err.. minna... I was going to make stew.. I know it's not really a party food."
" ooh.. you don't have to cook. Here we got pizza and beer."
" And look how nice we decorated your apartment? When we got here, it was almost empty except that furniture and there." What do you expect from a cheap student's apartment?

As they happily munched on the pizza and give each other toasts, Makino still could not help feeling lonesome. Seeing the F3 really reminded him of Doumyouji.

I wonder where he is right now.

Rui caught a look at Makino. She was staring out of the window. Watching the snow falling outside the window. He hardly could see the dark sky. There was no stars. The moon was hiding behind the clouds, not daring to show itself.

kimi o suki ni natte dore kurai tatsu no kana?
kimochi fukurande yuku bakari de
kimi wa kono omoi kizuiteiru kana
ichido mo kotoba ni wa shitenai kedo
yuki no youni tada shizuka ni
furi tsumori tsuzukete yuku

Yes.. like the snow. That was my love for you.

Makino suddenly excused herself. " I think I forgot to take out the trash. Be right there in a minute." She rushed towards the kitchen and then dashed out of the door. The rest of them just nodded. Almost all of them except Rui already half drunk.

Outside, Makino looked up at the sky. The snow was falling like sakura blossoms in spring. It felt so cold standing out here alone. Like in my heart.

If only Doumyouji was here...

She remembered he told her that after four years he'd be back for her. But last few days she read in the newspaper that his mother just appointed him as the vice president of her hotel chain. His name now renowned in the business world as a rising young entrepreneur carrying the name Doumyouji in the global industry. It doesn't look like he was coming back.

Hot tears flooding down her cheeks once moor and no matter how hard she tried, she could not make it stop.

Hold me tight konna omoi nara
dareka o suki ni naru kimochi
shiritaku nakatta yo
I love you namida tomaranai
konnanja kimi no koto
shirazuni ireba yokatta yo

" Makino-san.. why are you out there?" Makino turned around. She saw her apartment manager, an old wise man who always looked out for her. " You're crying, girl."
" No.. I was not. There was dust in my eyes. I must get back to my apartment, my friends were waiting for me."
" Ano.. Makino-san, chotto matte kudasai. You have a package."
" Package?"
" A young delivery boy came and told me to give it to you yourself as soon as possible but I fell asleep just now and did not notice you came back. I am sorry."
" It's all right. After all, it's Christmas. you better go home. Your wife would be worried sick."
He smiled. Makino stared at the package. There was no stamps or anything to show who was it from.

After saying her thankyou and goodbye, she climbed her way up the stairs. When she entered her apartment, she saw all of them except Rui were sprawled on the floor. Rui saw her and told her that after twenty cans of beer, they all got knocked out. His eyes fell on the package, "Who was that from?"
" I don't know. Perhaps my parents sent me a last minute Christmas gift."
" There's a writing on the back." She read it.
" Makino.. open this as soon as possible. That strange. Usually people would say to wait for tomorrow morning." She shot a glance at Rui, " Should I?" He just stared back at her. With a heavy sigh, she tore the package open. Inside it was a maroon winter jacket. It was long covering up to the knee. The material felt so soft yet so warm and thick. It smelt nice, a familiar scent. Just like the one Doumyouji always wore. Wait a minute.. is it...Her heart skipped a beat. There was a letter on it. Nervously, she picked it up and read.

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Makino.

Omotesando. Hanaemori Building. Midnight.

Doumyouji.
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He came back? It's impossible. Is this a joke.
" What is it, Makino?"
" Rui..."
" Makino.. Tell me what's wrong.." It's already 2 am. Only a stupid man would wait in this weather. But he waited before in the snow. But what if it's a lie? What if someone is playing a cruel prank on me?

Rui snatched the letter from her hand. His face darkened. " You should go."
" But what if it's a lie.. and it's already late.."
" You want to see him, don't you? Then, what are you waiting for..."
" Rui.."
" Go.. Now.. before I change my mind." Makino give him a long look. This man who have taken care of me always. Always thinking of my happiness. She nodded, got up, snatching her bag and the winter jacket, she dashed outside.
As Rui looked outside the window, he saw Makino's silhouette getting further and further away. Soon, she was like a blotch of red paint against the torrent of blizzard snow. He leaned against the glass window. The view started to blur. Goodbye, Makino.

kimi o itsu made omotteiru no ka na?
tameiki ga mado garasu kumoraseta
yureru kokoro tomosu kyandoru de
ima tokashite yukenai ka na?

As Makino ran and ran, now wearing the jacket, the heat seeping into her cold bones. Just like Doumyouji's warm hand always lending its warmth to my cold hands. My cold lonely hands.

Hold me tight oreru hodo tsuyoku
kogarashi fubuki ni deatte mo
samukunai you ni to

She arrived at the place only to find it deserted. She turned around and round but she could not find any sign of Doumyouji. She stood there for a long time. He did not came. I am just fooling myself.

She reached for her bag and brought out a cream colored knitted muffler she made for him. She thought of sending it to New York but thought he would just laugh at it. It was not that good anyway. Staring at the knit work, she felt so lonesome, her heart was breaking.

Why can't I just forget him and get on my life? Why I kept loving him even though he's not even with me?

I miss you kimi o omou tabi
amikake no kono mafura
konya mo hitori dakishimeru yo
eien ni furu yuki ga aru nara
kimi e to tsuzuku kono omoi kakuseru no ka na?

Suddenly, her pager started to beep very loudly. Makino cursed her luck. She kept the pager to let her boss knew where she is and to ask her whether to come in case any of the regular workers fall sick. He would sometimes pay her double for it. She glanced at the screen, to her surprise, it read.
_______________________
Look behind you. Doumyouji

Doumyouji had stood there watching Makino for the last one hour. Actually he wanted to make her wait longer. After all this is the second time she's late for our dates, I really should teach her a lesson.

But then again, he had not the heart to do so after seeing her breaking into tears like that. This girl who captured his heart and held him prisoner for eternity. Makino, finally sensing that she was not alone, gradually turned around and saw him with that ugly, arrogant smirk on his face. Her temper flared.

" You pig head!!! How dare you do this to me?!!"
" You're the one who were late."
" I was at work, stupid ass. I am not like you.. you who can shirk your job and not worry that you were going to get fired." Doumyouji grabbed her waist and yanked her closer. Makino pushed him away, fighting back her tears, " I thought you were not coming back to me ever. I thought that note was a cruel prank and you'd disappear from me again." She repeatedly hit him. " And you did not call. Not even one e-mail. I thought you .. you did not want to see me again. I hate you. I really hated you."
" Is that what you feel? Do you really hate me that much?" She nodded. " If you hated me, that much, tell me again. But this time I want to say it out loud."
" You think I wouldn't dare. Doumyouji!!!!!!!! I ha.." she was stopped by Doumyouji suddenly kissed her right smack on her lips. She pushed away but he persisted, his strong arms chaining her against his body, no matter how much she struggled, he did not want to let her go. Now that I finally caught you, I am not going to let you go. And soon she surrendered, she sighed contentedly and happily kissed him back. When they finally let go of each other, he smiled, " Now, that was more like my Makino Tsukushi." She pouted.
" What do you think I am? Something you own."
" Makino.. when will you stop misinterpreting my words? Do you know how much I wanted to see you? I toiled and worked my ass off to finish everything so that I can be here with you on Christmas but here you are standing there, cursing at me, not appreciating all the things I've done for you... What are you doing?" To his surprise, Makino wrapped the muffler around his neck. " Christmas present? For me?"
" You really wanted to see me? Really.." she asked eagerly. Doumyouji lovingly replied, " More than you know it.." Makino leaned her head against his chest. She could hear his pounding heart as loud and fast as her own. " You won't just leave me again..?" He shook his head.
" I promised you, I am not going anywhere. I just made a deal with my mother. In order to make me her vice president, I made her promise to let me stay in Tokyo." Makino's eye lit up happily on hearing his words. Then, she frowned. " Will she keep her promise?"
" Well, I promised her four years and I kept my end of the bargain. Now, it's her turn. Now, what were we doing just now?" Makino sheepishly replied, " We were in the middle of this." She pulled the muffler down to make Doumyouji lean towards her. Then, lightly she kissed her back. Doumyouji caught her lips and deepened the kiss, as he held her even tighter. Makino could feel herself melting against his warm body, she did not feel the cold anymore.

Hold me tight konna omoi nara
dareka o suki ni naru kimochi
shiritaku nakatta yo
I love you mune ni komiageru
fuyuzora ni sakebitai
"ima sugu kimi ni aitai yo"

In the midst of the cold, snow, the two embraced each other warming each other's cold, lonely hearts with their passion for each other. Their story were a legend on its own. A modern day Cinderella have finally meet her prince.

epilogue

" Doumyouji.."
" Mmm.."
" Are you still angry with me rejecting your proposal..?"
" How many times do I have to tell you.. It does not matter.."
" But.."
" I was expecting you were saying no anyway.."
" Ara.. then how come you asked.. Were you pulling my leg? "
" Makino.. could you just drop it..?"
" Not until you answer my question."
" well you never answered mine."
" What question? When did you ask?"
" You never said why you said no so I don't see the point telling you why I propose.."
" That was my business to say no."
" Then, it was my own business to propose."
" You dumb ass.."
" Pig head."
" Squid head.."
" Idiot ape.."
And their story continues...

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I could not remember exactly the name of the building where they had their first date. Is it Morinomiya or is it Morimiya? I'd check it up later. Haven't got the books with me right now.

updated: Reread and corrected most of the typos and grammar. Also corrected the place of the date. It's Hanaemori. ^-^

At first I wanted to put the translation instead of the original romaji verses but I felt it was much more better with the romaji version. Below is the lyrics and full translation of the song.

Eternal Snow - Changin' My Life (Full Moon o Sagashite 3rd ED)

Romaji by Akikaze

kimi o suki ni natte dore kurai tatsu no kana?
kimochi fukurande yuku bakari de
kimi wa kono omoi kuzuiteiru kana
ichido mo kotoba ni wa shitenai kedo
yuki no youni tada shizuka ni
furi tsumori tsuzukete yuku

Hold me tight konna omoi nara
dareka o suki ni naru kimochi
shiritaku nakatta yo
I love you namida tomaranai
konnanja kimi no koto
shirazuni ireba yokatta yo

kimi o itsu made omotteiru no ka na?
tameiki ga mado garasu kumoraseta

yureru kokoro tomosu kyandoru de
ima tokashite yukenai ka na?

Hold me tight oreru hodo tsuyoku
kogarashi fubuki ni deatte mo
samukunai you ni to
I miss you kimi o omou tabi
amikake no kono mafura
konya mo hitori dakishimeru yo

eien ni furu yuki ga aru nara
kimi e to tsuzuku kono omoi kakuseru no ka na?

Hold me tight konna omoi nara
dareka o suki ni naru kimochi
shiritaku nakatta yo
I love you mune ni komiageru
fuyuzora ni sakebitai
"ima sugu kimi ni aitai yo"

translation (by akikaze):

Ever since I had fallen in love with you... about how long has it been?
This feeling only continues to grow
Do you realize this feeling?
Although I've never said it once

Like the snow.... only quietly
It continues to pile up

Hold me tight, if this is how it feels
Then the feeling of falling in love with someone
was one I didn't want to know
I love you and my tears won't stop
If this be it, then I
should never have known you

How long will I continue to think of you?
My sigh clouded the window glass...

Isn't my swaying heart now
melting with the candle light?

Hold me tight, strong as if you were to break me apart...
Even if the trees wither, or we encounter a windstorm
I won't feel cold
I miss you... just thinking of you...
This knitted muffler...
Tonight again I will embrace myself alone

If there is snow that falls for all of eternity...
Would it hide my continuous feeling for you?

Hold me tight, if this is how it feels
Then the feeling of falling in love with someone
was one I didn't want to know
I love you ... this feeling building up in my heart
I want to shout under the winter sky,
"I want to see you right now"

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