Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone

Susanne the plans they made put an end to you

I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song

I just can't remember who to send it to

I've seen fire and I've seen rain

I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end

I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend

But I always thought that I'd see you again

Won't you look down upon me, Jesus

You've got to help me make a stand

You've just got to see me through another day

My body's aching and my time is at hand

And I won't make it any other way

Oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain

I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end

I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend

But I always thought that I'd see you again

Been walking my mind to an easy time my back turned towards the sun

Lord knows when the cold wind blows it'll turn your head around

Well, there's hours of time on the telephone line to talk about things

to come

Sweet dreams and flying machines in pieces on the ground

Oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain

I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end

I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend

But I always thought that I'd see you, baby, one more time again, now

Thought I'd see you one more time again

There's just a few things coming my way this time around, now

Thought I'd see you, thought I'd see you fire and rain, now

- James Taylor

I lay on my bed staring at the ceiling. I could hear the muffled sounds of Susan and Bryanne playing in the next room.

I knew Susan was grieving too but I just couldn't face Bry right now. I couldn't do anything. I couldn't think. I couldn't even cry.

I rolled over onto my side and hugged my pillow.

Dead.

That word. . .in my head. . .over and over.

Just that word.

That word. . .and John's face.

Dead.

I heard the bedroom door open and I could feel someone crawling across the bed. "Mommy?"

Bry's beautiful face appeared, framed by her redish curls. But all I could see was her eyes. Her father's eyes. Those eyes had been my undoing.

She kissed my cheek. "Don't worry, Mommy," she said. "Daddy will be home soon."

I let out a small sob. Susan lifted Bry off the bed and placed her on the floor. "Go get your shoes on and we'll go to the park," Susan said.

Bry gave me one last concerned look before trudging out of the room.

"You have to tell her," Susan said. "I know it's hard, Abby, but she needs to know."

"It's Christmas Eve," I whispered.

Susan rubbed my shoulder. "I know." She looked at the doorway and I knew Bry had reappeared.

"I'm ready Aunt Susan."

************************

I knew from my clock that they had been gone for about two hours but it felt like days.

I was sitting on the edge of my bed staring at the floor.

"How you doing?" Susan asked. I didn't answer. She hadn't expected me to.

Someone knocked on the door. Susan reluctantly left me to answer it. She stood in front of it for a moment, wiping tears from her face.

I braced myself. I knew that whoever was behind that door had heard about Carter and had come to console me. But I didn't want consolation. I wanted Carter.

Susan gasped and I looked up. I couldn't see who it was because the door was in my way. When Susan finally found her voice she said, "Oh my God. . ."

Ooooh, a cliff hanger. I'm evil. Bwhahahahaha! Anyway, review and there is more to follow.