Ok sorry this took so long but I had a slight mix up with my beta-reader
and it took an extra two weeks to have it ready.
Thanks to everyone who reviewed - I love you all so much!!!!!
Shadows had long since darkened the room, colouring every familiar object black. I knelt among them as I had done for the last seven hours, not noticing the screaming protests of my limbs.
I'd been waiting so long that I was beginning to give up hope. How would I know if he'd been captured?
It wasn't as though Death Eater's sent a complimentary 'we regret to inform you that your husband/boyfriend/wife/girlfriend/son/daughter/mother/father/friend (delete as appropriate) has been captured' letter.
I'd just be waiting for eternity- waiting until I had the sense to realise that he wasn't coming back.that he was dead.
I chewed my lip for the thousandth time that night and tasted blood. "Please." I whispered. "Please."I swallowed. "Please bring him back." I looked at the shadowed fireplace and sighed. Even if he did come back.once he found out the truth about my involvement he'd never be able to look at me again.
"Please don't let him hate me." My voice caught in my throat. Even if he does come back, then I'm not sure him hating me was a price I was willing to pay.
I know that generally people are selfless and say 'as long as he comes back, then I don't mind' but then again, people are generally idiots.
I didn't want him to die and I didn't want him to hate me- was that so much to ask?
But if they caught him.
I screwed my eyes shut and covered my ears with my hands. No. I wasn't even going to think about it.
I couldn't even imagine what they would do to him if they caught him. Well, actually I could- that was the problem. I could practically see his face contorted with agony - the blood flowing down his pale skin. I could see them beating him into unconsciousness and hurting him until he couldn't scream anymore.
I shook the images out of my head, trying to calm my racing heart down. I looked towards the fireplace, hoping that doing so would bring him back. My breath caught in my throat.
Harry was watching me, his green eyes silent.
"Harry." I breathed softly, relief sweeping through me. I squashed my sudden urge to throw my arms around him and never let him go.
His stony expression didn't change and, noticing the look in his eyes, the relief in me turned to nervous fear.
"Er . . .are you ok?" I asked uneasily.
He blinked slowly. "I'm fine. And yourself?"
His voice was impersonal and cool and did nothing to dispel my dears.
"Uh . . . I'm ok."
"Nothing you want to share with me?"
I frowned. "Share?" I questioned confusedly.
"Yeah- share."
"What would I want to share with you?" I was genuinely lost.
"Oh I don't know.anything about your involvement with Sirius and Remus.'
Ah. That.
In my excitement about his arrival I'd forgotten about that.
And now he hated me.
I took a deep breath, preparing myself for his hatred.
"Potter, I understand if you want me to leave. I know I should have told you that I oversaw their interrogation , but I just wanted you to find them without being distracted with knowing that. I mean, if you'd known-"
"You're babbling." Harry informed me. I stopped talking reluctantly. "Why do you feel guilty?"
Where had these new skills of observation come from?
'I don't feel-' I began.
"Don't lie, Dray." he took a step closer. "You do feel guilty. And since when do you feel guilty?"
Since you started calling me Dray?
I swallowed nervously. "Since it hurt you."
"And since when did you care how I felt?" he whispered.
He was so close now, I could feel the heat radiating off his body.
"I-" My eyes fluttered shut as he leant forward.
BANG!
I jerked back, my eyes snapping open.
Sirius Black had just floo-ed into the living room.
I stepped back away from Harry quickly. So quickly that a normal person would have entangled themselves in the carpet and tripped up- luckily I am not normal and so did not have to fall on my ass.
Instead, as I began to topple backwards, I grabbed a fistful of Harry's shirt. Unfortunately, I'd made the hideous mistake of forgetting that Harry had the balance of a one legged Hippogriff.
Therefore, the end result was slightly less graceful than I would have wished.
"Well, that explains a lot." Black quipped as Harry and I desperately tried to untangle ourselves from the compromising position we'd landed in.
"It's not what it looks like." Harry had turned a red colour I'd only ever seen before on tomatoes
"Well, that's a relief, or else I may have had to have gouged my eyes out." he gave me a disgusted look. "At this rate I still might have to."
I tried my hardest not to shoot him an evil glare.
Black offered his godson a hand to pull him to his feet.
I however stayed sprawled in an abnormal, extremely uncomfortable position on the floor. Not that I could really blame him for not helping me up - I had after all tortured the man continuously for two years. On the other hand - there was a lot to be said for good manners.
Harry smiled in a pained kind of way. "Hey, Sirius."
I considered the best way to get up without looking like a total twat. There weren't actually all that many options but considering that both the people in the room had forgotten I was there I didn't suppose it really mattered.
I grabbed a chair and hauled myself to my feet completely ungracefully, not taking my eyes of the interchange in front of me.
"Malfoy." Black sort of, almost, imperceptibly nodded his head in greeting.
Damn, he saw me.
"Black," I said in a cool 'I rule the world and do not mind at all that I seem to have tortured my first friend's godfather' tone.
From the look he gave me he didn't really seem to be buying it.
I returned to sulking.
**Well I thought it was cool** ~Me, too.~
He turned back to Harry. "I didn't really get chance to talk to you before."
Harry shifted his weight awkwardly. "Yeah, I know. I."
"I mean.you ran off pretty quickly after Remus told you who interrogated us." he shot me a look. "Makes a hell of a lot of sense now but I thought I'd come and see how you were."
"How *I* am??" Harry grinned slightly. "I think I should be asking you that."
Black smiled slightly. "I'm okay," he shot me a look, "No thanks to some people, though."
I bit the inside of my cheek to restrain any retort. I had tortured the man after all. I could handle a few snide comments.
"I mean, okay- murder, torture and bloodshed - that I've come to expect. But shacking up with my godson- that's an entirely different matter."
"We're not 'shacking up' Sirius." Harry said disarmingly.
Black made a 'humph' noise.
"Honestly!" Harry pressed.
"I don't believe you," Black looked at me and groaned. "Couldn't you at least have chosen a Death Eater with decent hair?"
Okay, that was it. Goodbye, guilt. My eyes narrowed.
Torture victim or not- no one disses the hair.
"Says the man with three inches of slime on his poor excuse for a haircut." My fists clenched.
Black's eyes flashed. "You little-"
"OK!" Harry exclaimed, intervening. "Sirius why don't you come over here and Draco- you go over there."
Reluctantly, I slunk over to the other side of the room, throwing deadly glares over my shoulder. "Sit." Harry ordered. I opened my mouth to object.
"SIT!" he repeated.
Muttering obscenities beneath my breath, I sat. What was I, a dog?
Oh well- best seat in the house (literally) for watching Harry vs. Black - round one.
"Are you absolutely crazy, Harry?" Black hissed.
Oooh, starting already.
Harry sighed slightly. "That seems to be the general consensus, yes."
"What on earth is he doing here? Do you have any idea of what he could do to you?"
"He's not going to do anything to me! Bloody hell!" Harry exclaimed. "Why is everyone intent on giving me 1,001 reasons why this is a bad idea? I know it wasn't the smartest thing to, do but it was *my* choice, and I've made it."
"But he's Draco Malfoy." Black sputtered. Oh, as if that explained everything.
"I know."
"I mean - shit- the only thing that could only be considered okay about him is the fact that we're related!"
"Well that's something, right?" Harry asked doubtfully.
"No. I was disowned, remember?"
"Oh, yeah."
"What could possibly make you live with that pretentious slimeball?"
I coughed slightly. "I can hear you, you know?" Black ignored me completely.
Harry smiled slightly. "He's not as bad as you think."
"I *highly* doubt that."
"I can *still* hear you." I stressed.
"Shut up." Black snapped. I rolled my eyes.
"He's changed, Padfoot." Harry insisted.
"Harry," Black sounded like he was talking to a child, "people like him don't change."
"They do."
"Actually, they don't." I chipped in.
Harry shot me a glare. "Draco." He said warningly.
Black's look was terrifying, but I met it without flinching.
"Does he *have* to be here?" Black asked coldly.
"I *do* live here." I commented. "But you're right." I turned to Harry. "Do I have to be here?"
Harry folded his arms and looked at me with a furrowed brow. "Do you want to leave?"
"No, not particularly." I shrugged. "I'd rather stay here and attempt to help you defend yourself, but I don't think that my presence is helping."
Harry visibly softened. "It's helping me."
"Oh, God." Black looked like he was about to throw up. "Oh, God- this is just wrong on so many levels."
"Says the man screwing a werewolf." I retorted, feeling faintly put out by his criticising of Harry.
Harry's mouth dropped open. "No way. You and Remus?" Black glared at me.
"Oops." How could Harry have had no idea?
"How long? " Harry asked in amazement.
Black shrugged helplessly. "Well . . . forever . . . on and off." He looked a bit uncomfortable. "I mean, we weren't actually together but you know . . . feelings were there."
"And you didn't tell me?" Harry looked hurt.
"It wasn't something that would have been particularly easy to tell you."
"You could have just said 'Harry, I'm in love with Remus, he's in love with me and we're one big happy gay family'." I offered. "Not exactly difficult."
"Because you're such a poster child for honest, clean living." Black's voice oozed sarcasm. "What with all that murdering, raping and pillaging."
"I've never lied to my godson." I folded my arms. "And I think you're thinking of pirates- I've never raped anybody. Been fighting them off with sticks actually."
Black looked disgusted. "How on Earth did you not go to Azkabhan? I would have thought a judge would send you there just to shut you up."
"I can imagine that would be true." I agreed.
"And yet you're here." he said slowly.
"Well, I've not had the opportunity to offend a judge yet."
"Did they gag you in court?" Black looked hopeful.
"Court?" I asked airily. "What court?"
He froze. "You didn't go to court?"
"Nope." I said with a smirk.
Black slowly turned to Harry. "Why do I feel you had something to do with this?"
"Uhhh.." Harry looked at the floor. "Because I did?"
"What. Did. You. Do?"
"I told everybody that Draco was a spy, and got Dumbledore to show McRain the information Draco sent during the war."
"And where did you get that?"
"I forged it."
I choked, not realising the lengths Harry had gone to to keep me from going to Azkabhan.
Black looked equally stunned. "That boy's no spy." He exclaimed.
Boy? Excuse me, *boy*?
"I know." Harry agreed despondently. "I know."
"So what did you do? Perform memory charms on everybody?"
'No." Harry looked at the floor. "I just gave everyone my word that he was."
"And they believed you?" he said incredulously.
'Yeah.' Harry said imperturbably.
"Are they mad?"
"No just blinded by his 'Boy who Lived' status". I drawled. "Either that or his preeetty green eyes," I smirked, "I could never really work out which one." Black just looked at me. "Yeah, should I just be quiet again?" I asked Harry. He nodded in reply, and I shut up.
"That doesn't explain why he's here." Black said stubbornly.
"Because he needed somewhere to stay. This was the last place anyone would expect, and I can keep an eye on him to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."
~I am calm. I am floating in a sea of peace and enlightenment. I am at peace with my inner self and with that nasty, conceited, arrogant, narrow minded, prejudiced piece of shit Black! ~
Oops.
"Harry, there was enough information in that place to find and catch every single Death Eater who ever existed, charge them and send them to Azkabhan for life." Black looked like he was about to explode with rage. "And you left it all there!"
He had?
I looked at him sharply and a flush spread on his cheeks, simultaneous with the flow of warmth inside me.
"I didn't think it was ethical." Harry said softly.
"Ethical?"
"Draco only told me where the base was so I could rescue you. I wasn't going to throw that back in his face. The Death Eaters will all be caught eventually- there's nothing they can do to escape it."
"So why does it matter if you took the information?"
"Because I'd be betraying someone's trust, and that would make me just as bad as them."
"And lying doesn't?"
Black and Harry were caught in a battle of will, their eyes locked on each other. The silence stretched on, neither of them so much as blinking. Eventually, Harry broke their gaze and shook his head slightly. "Sirius . . . "
"If I told them . . . " Black's voice told how serious he was about this threat; 'he'd be in Azkabhan in a heartbeat.'
"True." Harry nodded. "And so would I."
Black frowned, realising that this battle was not going the way he wanted it to. "Harry-"he started.
"Look, Sirius," Harry interrupted, "If you love me, then this is something you're just going to have to accept. I know this is a horrible thing to spring on you. I know that you don't understand and probably never will, but I just need you to accept it okay? You don't have to like it- you don't even have to approve - I just need you to accept it."
There was a chilling silence. "I'm not sure I can do that." Black said softly.
The pain in Harry's eyes was unbearable. It looked as though he'd just lost the only person who mattered to him and as though he'd die of heartbreak.
"Harry," I said suddenly. "Will you excuse us for a second?"
"'Us'?" Harry looked faintly worried. "Who's 'us'?"
"Myself and Black." I stated calmly.
"Uhmmm . . . " he looked reluctant.
"Please."
The p-word seemed to clinch it.
"Fine." Harry said slowly. "But you can't injure, maim, or attack him in any way."
"I'm sure Black can take care of himself."
"That didn't answer my question."
"I'll behave." I promised.
Hesitantly, Harry got up and left the room.
As soon as his footsteps became faint, I spun and advanced on Black.
"Listen Black, I know you don't like me-" He made a strangled 'understatement of the century' noise which I ignored. "And truth be told I'm not that keen on you either. And whilst I really am enjoying these wonderful arguments with you, I don't think they're helping Harry one bit. You're his godfather and he needs you. You're important to him and for some reason, which I don't really understand, I'm important to him as well. And he doesn't need us fighting."
Black's mouth was open. "How dare you have the audacity to lecture me about my own godson's happiness?"
"Because as much as you don't believe it- he's important to me too."
"I would sooner die than hurt Harry." he hissed.
"Then grow the fuck up and start acting like an adult." I snapped.
"I *am* acting like an adult - I'm trying to protect him."
"Newsflash - you can't protect him. He's been through a lot. He doesn't need to be protected."
"Then what does he need?"
I sighed. "You're the closest thing he's ever had to a family. And while I didn't object too strongly when his friends left him out in the cold, I'm not going to let you do it without a damn good reason. He's got a hell of a lot of issues and he needs someone to be there for him."
"And you think that's going to be your role, do you?" Black folded his arms.
I looked at him coldly. "That wasn't what I was implying."
"Then what were you implying?"
I looked at him incredulously. "Bloody hell, Black it shouldn't take me to tell you to support him." I snapped.
"How can I support him when what he wants is you?" he exploded.
I stopped, breathing heavily. "Harry doesn't know what he wants, ok? He's confused, he's tired, he's lonely - he doesn't know who or what he wants."
"Harry knows exactly what he wants," Black's eyes flashed, "he's not a child."
My voice was icy as I met his eyes. "Then don't treat him like one."
Black stared at me silently, his feelings inscrutable.
Catching sight of Harry in the corner of my eye, I calmly extended my right hand.
"Nice to see you, Black." My voice was polite and formal.
He hesitated for one moment then reached out and took my hand. "You too, Malfoy." his lips curved up into a smirk. "Must do it again some day."
"And be sure to bring your boyfriend." I stepped away, nodding slightly to Harry.
"Yeah," Black's smirk deepened, "we can double date." Harry choked and I fought a smile. Maybe Black wasn't all bad.
"See me out, Harry?" Black said pointedly.
"Sure." Harry walked him over to the fireplace and I moved into the kitchen on a search for food.
My worrying for Harry had made me exceptionally hungry, and I managed to dig out a variety of flavours of crisps. Loaded with my findings, I returned to the living room and dumped them on the table.
"How did you do that?" Harry asked in amazement, walking back into the room.
"Do what?" I asked around a mouthful of crisps.
"Get Sirius to be civil to you."
I shrugged slightly. "My incredible charm?"
"No . . . seriously."
I sent him a mock glare. "That was seriously."
"Oh . . . all right then." Harry looked a tad confused.
I smiled slightly. "I was kidding, you fool."
"I know that - I was just leaving you to your mad delusions."
"Mad delusions?" I faked incredulous anger. "Mad delusions?"
"Yep."
I fluttered my eyes slightly and took a step forward. "So you don't think I'm charming, then?"
Faced with an incredibly charming Draco Malfoy, Harry did the only thing he could do.
Stuttered.
"Well . . ." he stuttered. "I'm sure you're very charming but-"
"But? There is no 'but'- I am damn well am charming." I leaned forward further. "You've just never found out how much."
Harry was staring me at with a stunned expression, his eyes glazing over. My heart fluttered in my chest as he closed the distance between us.
Our lips were about to touch when-
BANG!
'What the hell is going on here?' I exploded. 'Is this some sort of conspiracy?'
I whirled round and barely had time to throw myself to one side before a red beam of light was hurled towards me. I hit the floor and rolled, banging my shoulder painfully on the table.
'What the hell?' I repeated, half raising myself.
'Stay the fuck down.' Harry shouted, pushing me back into my sprawled heap as another spell narrowly missed me.
"You wish." I ground out, advancing on all fours, to peer over the back of the sofa.
A masked Death Eater was muttering incantations, sending spells flying in ever direction.
"Come out, traitor!" The Death Eater shouted.
"Aww sorry to disappoint you but I came out a long time ago. Shame you missed it- it was a good party."
The assassin tried to see where I was. "Where are you?" he growled. I rolled my eyes- did this bloke have an ounce of intelligence?
Harry was silently and stealthily creeping round the room. Had to hand it to him he was dedicated - he wasn't even going in with the banter. That was the best bit!
"Behind you." I popped up, trying to give Harry an opening to attack.
The Death Eater spun round his wand pointed straight at me.
Oh shit.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
"Ava-"
"Expelliarmus." Harry shouted. Sweat apparent on my forehead, I glared at Harry.
"How long does it take?" I exclaimed.
"Sorry!"
"He could have killed me!"
"He didn't." Harry said weakly.
"Yeah well, we'll talk about this later." I threatened.
I turned to the figure frozen at the other side of the room.
"Naylor, take the fucking mask off." I snapped. I only knew one Death Eater who was stupid enough to turn his back on the enemy. The figure hesitated. "You always were a shitty assassin - it's not hard to tell who you are. Are times so hard that they had to send you to do a real wizard's job?"
There was no reply.
I rolled my eyes. "For God's sake." I stormed over to where he stood and wrenched the mask off his face. "There. I did it. Now you don't have to worry about betraying 'Death Eater principles' or some equally shitty drivel. You always did have far too many principles." I gave him a speculative look. "Thought obviously not enough to abstain from killing your own leader."
Anger flickered on Naylor's stony face. "No more than what you did, and no less than you deserve."
"Ooh clever- who taught you that one?" I contemplated. "Zabini, right? Seems like his sort of misguided style."
"No one had to teach me- traitor. I know exactly what to do with people like you."
"People like me?" I adopted a mock-offended tone. "Aw, Potter, see what you reduced me to?"
Harry looked at me as if I were crazy. "Uh Draco don't you think that we should be . . . " he nodded towards Naylor, who was edging towards the fireplace.
"Hmm? Oh- no." I watched Naylor. "Just let him leave. The Death Eaters will punish him far more effectively than your side could. An assassin who failed his mission is as good as dead anyway."
There was a flash of green fire.
"Good riddance." I said brightly. "Truthfully, I can't even believe he left his wand - what an idiot. To think he was one of my own." I shook my head mournfully.
"Draco, the fact that your employees are totally useless aside." Harry's voice was faintly sarcastic (a new and exciting stage for him). "Shouldn't we be bothering about the fact that you're now a Death Eater target, and they know where you are?"
I shook my head unconcernedly. "Nope."
"And why not?"
"Because it'll take them at least three days to plan another attack - assuming they can even be bothered. Zabini doesn't really have all that much patience."
"I still should inform Dumbledore that-"
"Maybe later, Harry." I led him over to the sofa. "What you should do now is tell me all about your little adventure at Prison number 243111."
"How many prisons do you have?" Harry asked incredulously.
"Twelve - it just sounds more impressive with a six digit name."
Harry snorted slightly and sat down on the sofa.
I flopped down next to him and prepared to ask questions. "How did you get them out, anyway?"
"Oh- guns." Harry shrugged. "Not the thing that a load of purebloods would have been expecting."
I frowned. "They're those things that were in that film, right?"
"James Bond? Yeah they are - but mine were far less cool."
"So you just ran in there shooting people randomly."
"No." Harry looked at me as if I were mad. "I and ten people ran in there shooting people randomly."
"Ah I see." So he'd taken my advice after all. "So Sirius and Remus were okay?"
"Yeah they seemed to be. I think I'm supposed to be having dinner with them some time- should be fun. Of course *now* I'm just going to look at them and see them in bed together, which will be faintly disturbing, to say the least."
I laughed slightly. "Well I'm glad you got them back."
Harry smiled. "It was only thanks to you that I did."
"It was thanks to me that you almost lost them." I countered.
"I still got them back." he said softly.
I made a noncommittal noise and looked down. Harry broke the silence minutes later. "Can I ask you something?"
"You didn't really give me much choice there did you?" I drawled.
"Seriously." he stressed.
I sighed. "Go ahead."
He looked down at his hands a blush staining his cheeks. "That thing that happened between us at Hogwarts . . ."
I knew that was going to come back and bite me in the ass.
"Do you ever think about it?"
"No." I lied, trying not to notice his disappointed expression. "Why- do you?"
"No." he replied quickly, too quickly.
An uncomfortable silence fell between us and I shifted my weight nervously, trying to decide what to say.
"Potter it was one kiss that happened five years ago. Don't make it into something it isn't."
"And what isn't it?" he asked quietly.
Important. Special. Incredible. Meaningful.
A thousand words flashed through my mind but I couldn't use any of them.
"A big deal." I said finally after a large silence. "It wasn't a big deal. You weren't by any means the first or last person I kissed, on either side. It didn't mean anything right? It was just . . . " I struggled for words, "it was just a stupid mistake that won't be repeated."
Slightly shell-shocked he nodded numbly.
I settled back onto the sofa, trying to relax.
I kinda hoped that that was it but it seemed that it was only the tip of the iceberg. Harry wanted to talk to me about something and he was too shy or stupid or honourable to.
After a few minutes of his insufferable shuffling and fidgeting I snapped.
"Potter, why don't you just come out and ask me what you want to."
Did I really need to use the phrase 'come out'?
"What?" he looked startled.
"Ever since I got here you've been wanting to ask me something but you haven't out of fear, honour or some other equally twisted emotion. Just ask me."
For a second I thought I'd scared him into fleeing but to my surprise he stood his ground.
"Why didn't you want anything to happen?" he blurted. "Why did you run away from it?"
"Why did *I* run away from it?" I asked in disbelief. "You're the one who never bloody turned up. I waited for you for three hours and you never came. And then let's be honest- it wasn't like you ever really felt the need to talk to me again was it?"
"You're the one who never replied to my letter- what was that if not running away?"
I looked at him as if he was crazy - which in fact he probably was. "What are you talking about? What letter?"
"What letter?" he exploded incredulously. "What letter?"
Yes Potter- what letter?
"That would be the letter in which I told you how crazy I was about you. The letter in which I said that I thought about you every second of every day and had done for a really long time. The one where I said that I might be falling in lo-" he stopped suddenly, noticing my blank look. He swallowed slightly, the colour swiftly draining from his face. "You really don't know what letter?"
Mutedly I shook my head in confirmation.
"Oh." he squeaked slightly, swallowing noiselessly. "Ok. Well I'll just go and . . . " he waved his hands around, unable to think of anything, " . . . be somewhere that isn't here."
He dashed out of the room, his actions positively screaming 'oh my god I'm such a moron'.
Which - ok he was but still . . .
He was 'falling in lo-'.
Now I'm not trying to sound conceited here but there are only so many things that could mean.
I vaguely did a run through of all the words I could think of beginning with lo.
Well unless he was falling in lotion then I could probably deduce that the missing word was love.
Love.
. . . . . .
. . .
Fucking hell.
My eyes doubled in size as I thought about it.
Harry Potter was in love with me.
Black was right-that sounded wrong - so very very wrong.
I mean it would explain an awful lot but .
It just -
He couldn't -
When -
How -
Why couldn't I even fucking form a thought sentence anymore?
Other than the fact that the world could quite possibly be ending.
He couldn't love me.
I mean okay - I was fucking gorgeous and rich and powerful and witty and anybody who didn't instantly fall to their knees and worship me was a total idiot but.
Actually, why couldn't he love me?
Oh yeah . . . because we were supposed to hate each other.
But then again ,we didn't, so that excuse sucked.
Uhmm . . . I'd killed half the wizarding world?
Although he didn't actually seem to hold that against me.
He wasn't supposed to be gay?
But I wasn't exactly complaining seven years ago when he had his tongue stuck down my throat.
Wow, this was difficult.
I scrunched my face up, desperately brainstorming for ideas.
Ooh ooh I had it - the mother of all reasons.
I didn't love him and therefore did not want or deserve his love.
Having settled that I relaxed, trying to ignore the niggling feeling that somehow . . . I didn't think it was going to make a blind bit of difference.
Thanks for still reading!!!
Please review cuz they keep me going
~Cherrycola~
Thanks to everyone who reviewed - I love you all so much!!!!!
Shadows had long since darkened the room, colouring every familiar object black. I knelt among them as I had done for the last seven hours, not noticing the screaming protests of my limbs.
I'd been waiting so long that I was beginning to give up hope. How would I know if he'd been captured?
It wasn't as though Death Eater's sent a complimentary 'we regret to inform you that your husband/boyfriend/wife/girlfriend/son/daughter/mother/father/friend (delete as appropriate) has been captured' letter.
I'd just be waiting for eternity- waiting until I had the sense to realise that he wasn't coming back.that he was dead.
I chewed my lip for the thousandth time that night and tasted blood. "Please." I whispered. "Please."I swallowed. "Please bring him back." I looked at the shadowed fireplace and sighed. Even if he did come back.once he found out the truth about my involvement he'd never be able to look at me again.
"Please don't let him hate me." My voice caught in my throat. Even if he does come back, then I'm not sure him hating me was a price I was willing to pay.
I know that generally people are selfless and say 'as long as he comes back, then I don't mind' but then again, people are generally idiots.
I didn't want him to die and I didn't want him to hate me- was that so much to ask?
But if they caught him.
I screwed my eyes shut and covered my ears with my hands. No. I wasn't even going to think about it.
I couldn't even imagine what they would do to him if they caught him. Well, actually I could- that was the problem. I could practically see his face contorted with agony - the blood flowing down his pale skin. I could see them beating him into unconsciousness and hurting him until he couldn't scream anymore.
I shook the images out of my head, trying to calm my racing heart down. I looked towards the fireplace, hoping that doing so would bring him back. My breath caught in my throat.
Harry was watching me, his green eyes silent.
"Harry." I breathed softly, relief sweeping through me. I squashed my sudden urge to throw my arms around him and never let him go.
His stony expression didn't change and, noticing the look in his eyes, the relief in me turned to nervous fear.
"Er . . .are you ok?" I asked uneasily.
He blinked slowly. "I'm fine. And yourself?"
His voice was impersonal and cool and did nothing to dispel my dears.
"Uh . . . I'm ok."
"Nothing you want to share with me?"
I frowned. "Share?" I questioned confusedly.
"Yeah- share."
"What would I want to share with you?" I was genuinely lost.
"Oh I don't know.anything about your involvement with Sirius and Remus.'
Ah. That.
In my excitement about his arrival I'd forgotten about that.
And now he hated me.
I took a deep breath, preparing myself for his hatred.
"Potter, I understand if you want me to leave. I know I should have told you that I oversaw their interrogation , but I just wanted you to find them without being distracted with knowing that. I mean, if you'd known-"
"You're babbling." Harry informed me. I stopped talking reluctantly. "Why do you feel guilty?"
Where had these new skills of observation come from?
'I don't feel-' I began.
"Don't lie, Dray." he took a step closer. "You do feel guilty. And since when do you feel guilty?"
Since you started calling me Dray?
I swallowed nervously. "Since it hurt you."
"And since when did you care how I felt?" he whispered.
He was so close now, I could feel the heat radiating off his body.
"I-" My eyes fluttered shut as he leant forward.
BANG!
I jerked back, my eyes snapping open.
Sirius Black had just floo-ed into the living room.
I stepped back away from Harry quickly. So quickly that a normal person would have entangled themselves in the carpet and tripped up- luckily I am not normal and so did not have to fall on my ass.
Instead, as I began to topple backwards, I grabbed a fistful of Harry's shirt. Unfortunately, I'd made the hideous mistake of forgetting that Harry had the balance of a one legged Hippogriff.
Therefore, the end result was slightly less graceful than I would have wished.
"Well, that explains a lot." Black quipped as Harry and I desperately tried to untangle ourselves from the compromising position we'd landed in.
"It's not what it looks like." Harry had turned a red colour I'd only ever seen before on tomatoes
"Well, that's a relief, or else I may have had to have gouged my eyes out." he gave me a disgusted look. "At this rate I still might have to."
I tried my hardest not to shoot him an evil glare.
Black offered his godson a hand to pull him to his feet.
I however stayed sprawled in an abnormal, extremely uncomfortable position on the floor. Not that I could really blame him for not helping me up - I had after all tortured the man continuously for two years. On the other hand - there was a lot to be said for good manners.
Harry smiled in a pained kind of way. "Hey, Sirius."
I considered the best way to get up without looking like a total twat. There weren't actually all that many options but considering that both the people in the room had forgotten I was there I didn't suppose it really mattered.
I grabbed a chair and hauled myself to my feet completely ungracefully, not taking my eyes of the interchange in front of me.
"Malfoy." Black sort of, almost, imperceptibly nodded his head in greeting.
Damn, he saw me.
"Black," I said in a cool 'I rule the world and do not mind at all that I seem to have tortured my first friend's godfather' tone.
From the look he gave me he didn't really seem to be buying it.
I returned to sulking.
**Well I thought it was cool** ~Me, too.~
He turned back to Harry. "I didn't really get chance to talk to you before."
Harry shifted his weight awkwardly. "Yeah, I know. I."
"I mean.you ran off pretty quickly after Remus told you who interrogated us." he shot me a look. "Makes a hell of a lot of sense now but I thought I'd come and see how you were."
"How *I* am??" Harry grinned slightly. "I think I should be asking you that."
Black smiled slightly. "I'm okay," he shot me a look, "No thanks to some people, though."
I bit the inside of my cheek to restrain any retort. I had tortured the man after all. I could handle a few snide comments.
"I mean, okay- murder, torture and bloodshed - that I've come to expect. But shacking up with my godson- that's an entirely different matter."
"We're not 'shacking up' Sirius." Harry said disarmingly.
Black made a 'humph' noise.
"Honestly!" Harry pressed.
"I don't believe you," Black looked at me and groaned. "Couldn't you at least have chosen a Death Eater with decent hair?"
Okay, that was it. Goodbye, guilt. My eyes narrowed.
Torture victim or not- no one disses the hair.
"Says the man with three inches of slime on his poor excuse for a haircut." My fists clenched.
Black's eyes flashed. "You little-"
"OK!" Harry exclaimed, intervening. "Sirius why don't you come over here and Draco- you go over there."
Reluctantly, I slunk over to the other side of the room, throwing deadly glares over my shoulder. "Sit." Harry ordered. I opened my mouth to object.
"SIT!" he repeated.
Muttering obscenities beneath my breath, I sat. What was I, a dog?
Oh well- best seat in the house (literally) for watching Harry vs. Black - round one.
"Are you absolutely crazy, Harry?" Black hissed.
Oooh, starting already.
Harry sighed slightly. "That seems to be the general consensus, yes."
"What on earth is he doing here? Do you have any idea of what he could do to you?"
"He's not going to do anything to me! Bloody hell!" Harry exclaimed. "Why is everyone intent on giving me 1,001 reasons why this is a bad idea? I know it wasn't the smartest thing to, do but it was *my* choice, and I've made it."
"But he's Draco Malfoy." Black sputtered. Oh, as if that explained everything.
"I know."
"I mean - shit- the only thing that could only be considered okay about him is the fact that we're related!"
"Well that's something, right?" Harry asked doubtfully.
"No. I was disowned, remember?"
"Oh, yeah."
"What could possibly make you live with that pretentious slimeball?"
I coughed slightly. "I can hear you, you know?" Black ignored me completely.
Harry smiled slightly. "He's not as bad as you think."
"I *highly* doubt that."
"I can *still* hear you." I stressed.
"Shut up." Black snapped. I rolled my eyes.
"He's changed, Padfoot." Harry insisted.
"Harry," Black sounded like he was talking to a child, "people like him don't change."
"They do."
"Actually, they don't." I chipped in.
Harry shot me a glare. "Draco." He said warningly.
Black's look was terrifying, but I met it without flinching.
"Does he *have* to be here?" Black asked coldly.
"I *do* live here." I commented. "But you're right." I turned to Harry. "Do I have to be here?"
Harry folded his arms and looked at me with a furrowed brow. "Do you want to leave?"
"No, not particularly." I shrugged. "I'd rather stay here and attempt to help you defend yourself, but I don't think that my presence is helping."
Harry visibly softened. "It's helping me."
"Oh, God." Black looked like he was about to throw up. "Oh, God- this is just wrong on so many levels."
"Says the man screwing a werewolf." I retorted, feeling faintly put out by his criticising of Harry.
Harry's mouth dropped open. "No way. You and Remus?" Black glared at me.
"Oops." How could Harry have had no idea?
"How long? " Harry asked in amazement.
Black shrugged helplessly. "Well . . . forever . . . on and off." He looked a bit uncomfortable. "I mean, we weren't actually together but you know . . . feelings were there."
"And you didn't tell me?" Harry looked hurt.
"It wasn't something that would have been particularly easy to tell you."
"You could have just said 'Harry, I'm in love with Remus, he's in love with me and we're one big happy gay family'." I offered. "Not exactly difficult."
"Because you're such a poster child for honest, clean living." Black's voice oozed sarcasm. "What with all that murdering, raping and pillaging."
"I've never lied to my godson." I folded my arms. "And I think you're thinking of pirates- I've never raped anybody. Been fighting them off with sticks actually."
Black looked disgusted. "How on Earth did you not go to Azkabhan? I would have thought a judge would send you there just to shut you up."
"I can imagine that would be true." I agreed.
"And yet you're here." he said slowly.
"Well, I've not had the opportunity to offend a judge yet."
"Did they gag you in court?" Black looked hopeful.
"Court?" I asked airily. "What court?"
He froze. "You didn't go to court?"
"Nope." I said with a smirk.
Black slowly turned to Harry. "Why do I feel you had something to do with this?"
"Uhhh.." Harry looked at the floor. "Because I did?"
"What. Did. You. Do?"
"I told everybody that Draco was a spy, and got Dumbledore to show McRain the information Draco sent during the war."
"And where did you get that?"
"I forged it."
I choked, not realising the lengths Harry had gone to to keep me from going to Azkabhan.
Black looked equally stunned. "That boy's no spy." He exclaimed.
Boy? Excuse me, *boy*?
"I know." Harry agreed despondently. "I know."
"So what did you do? Perform memory charms on everybody?"
'No." Harry looked at the floor. "I just gave everyone my word that he was."
"And they believed you?" he said incredulously.
'Yeah.' Harry said imperturbably.
"Are they mad?"
"No just blinded by his 'Boy who Lived' status". I drawled. "Either that or his preeetty green eyes," I smirked, "I could never really work out which one." Black just looked at me. "Yeah, should I just be quiet again?" I asked Harry. He nodded in reply, and I shut up.
"That doesn't explain why he's here." Black said stubbornly.
"Because he needed somewhere to stay. This was the last place anyone would expect, and I can keep an eye on him to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid."
~I am calm. I am floating in a sea of peace and enlightenment. I am at peace with my inner self and with that nasty, conceited, arrogant, narrow minded, prejudiced piece of shit Black! ~
Oops.
"Harry, there was enough information in that place to find and catch every single Death Eater who ever existed, charge them and send them to Azkabhan for life." Black looked like he was about to explode with rage. "And you left it all there!"
He had?
I looked at him sharply and a flush spread on his cheeks, simultaneous with the flow of warmth inside me.
"I didn't think it was ethical." Harry said softly.
"Ethical?"
"Draco only told me where the base was so I could rescue you. I wasn't going to throw that back in his face. The Death Eaters will all be caught eventually- there's nothing they can do to escape it."
"So why does it matter if you took the information?"
"Because I'd be betraying someone's trust, and that would make me just as bad as them."
"And lying doesn't?"
Black and Harry were caught in a battle of will, their eyes locked on each other. The silence stretched on, neither of them so much as blinking. Eventually, Harry broke their gaze and shook his head slightly. "Sirius . . . "
"If I told them . . . " Black's voice told how serious he was about this threat; 'he'd be in Azkabhan in a heartbeat.'
"True." Harry nodded. "And so would I."
Black frowned, realising that this battle was not going the way he wanted it to. "Harry-"he started.
"Look, Sirius," Harry interrupted, "If you love me, then this is something you're just going to have to accept. I know this is a horrible thing to spring on you. I know that you don't understand and probably never will, but I just need you to accept it okay? You don't have to like it- you don't even have to approve - I just need you to accept it."
There was a chilling silence. "I'm not sure I can do that." Black said softly.
The pain in Harry's eyes was unbearable. It looked as though he'd just lost the only person who mattered to him and as though he'd die of heartbreak.
"Harry," I said suddenly. "Will you excuse us for a second?"
"'Us'?" Harry looked faintly worried. "Who's 'us'?"
"Myself and Black." I stated calmly.
"Uhmmm . . . " he looked reluctant.
"Please."
The p-word seemed to clinch it.
"Fine." Harry said slowly. "But you can't injure, maim, or attack him in any way."
"I'm sure Black can take care of himself."
"That didn't answer my question."
"I'll behave." I promised.
Hesitantly, Harry got up and left the room.
As soon as his footsteps became faint, I spun and advanced on Black.
"Listen Black, I know you don't like me-" He made a strangled 'understatement of the century' noise which I ignored. "And truth be told I'm not that keen on you either. And whilst I really am enjoying these wonderful arguments with you, I don't think they're helping Harry one bit. You're his godfather and he needs you. You're important to him and for some reason, which I don't really understand, I'm important to him as well. And he doesn't need us fighting."
Black's mouth was open. "How dare you have the audacity to lecture me about my own godson's happiness?"
"Because as much as you don't believe it- he's important to me too."
"I would sooner die than hurt Harry." he hissed.
"Then grow the fuck up and start acting like an adult." I snapped.
"I *am* acting like an adult - I'm trying to protect him."
"Newsflash - you can't protect him. He's been through a lot. He doesn't need to be protected."
"Then what does he need?"
I sighed. "You're the closest thing he's ever had to a family. And while I didn't object too strongly when his friends left him out in the cold, I'm not going to let you do it without a damn good reason. He's got a hell of a lot of issues and he needs someone to be there for him."
"And you think that's going to be your role, do you?" Black folded his arms.
I looked at him coldly. "That wasn't what I was implying."
"Then what were you implying?"
I looked at him incredulously. "Bloody hell, Black it shouldn't take me to tell you to support him." I snapped.
"How can I support him when what he wants is you?" he exploded.
I stopped, breathing heavily. "Harry doesn't know what he wants, ok? He's confused, he's tired, he's lonely - he doesn't know who or what he wants."
"Harry knows exactly what he wants," Black's eyes flashed, "he's not a child."
My voice was icy as I met his eyes. "Then don't treat him like one."
Black stared at me silently, his feelings inscrutable.
Catching sight of Harry in the corner of my eye, I calmly extended my right hand.
"Nice to see you, Black." My voice was polite and formal.
He hesitated for one moment then reached out and took my hand. "You too, Malfoy." his lips curved up into a smirk. "Must do it again some day."
"And be sure to bring your boyfriend." I stepped away, nodding slightly to Harry.
"Yeah," Black's smirk deepened, "we can double date." Harry choked and I fought a smile. Maybe Black wasn't all bad.
"See me out, Harry?" Black said pointedly.
"Sure." Harry walked him over to the fireplace and I moved into the kitchen on a search for food.
My worrying for Harry had made me exceptionally hungry, and I managed to dig out a variety of flavours of crisps. Loaded with my findings, I returned to the living room and dumped them on the table.
"How did you do that?" Harry asked in amazement, walking back into the room.
"Do what?" I asked around a mouthful of crisps.
"Get Sirius to be civil to you."
I shrugged slightly. "My incredible charm?"
"No . . . seriously."
I sent him a mock glare. "That was seriously."
"Oh . . . all right then." Harry looked a tad confused.
I smiled slightly. "I was kidding, you fool."
"I know that - I was just leaving you to your mad delusions."
"Mad delusions?" I faked incredulous anger. "Mad delusions?"
"Yep."
I fluttered my eyes slightly and took a step forward. "So you don't think I'm charming, then?"
Faced with an incredibly charming Draco Malfoy, Harry did the only thing he could do.
Stuttered.
"Well . . ." he stuttered. "I'm sure you're very charming but-"
"But? There is no 'but'- I am damn well am charming." I leaned forward further. "You've just never found out how much."
Harry was staring me at with a stunned expression, his eyes glazing over. My heart fluttered in my chest as he closed the distance between us.
Our lips were about to touch when-
BANG!
'What the hell is going on here?' I exploded. 'Is this some sort of conspiracy?'
I whirled round and barely had time to throw myself to one side before a red beam of light was hurled towards me. I hit the floor and rolled, banging my shoulder painfully on the table.
'What the hell?' I repeated, half raising myself.
'Stay the fuck down.' Harry shouted, pushing me back into my sprawled heap as another spell narrowly missed me.
"You wish." I ground out, advancing on all fours, to peer over the back of the sofa.
A masked Death Eater was muttering incantations, sending spells flying in ever direction.
"Come out, traitor!" The Death Eater shouted.
"Aww sorry to disappoint you but I came out a long time ago. Shame you missed it- it was a good party."
The assassin tried to see where I was. "Where are you?" he growled. I rolled my eyes- did this bloke have an ounce of intelligence?
Harry was silently and stealthily creeping round the room. Had to hand it to him he was dedicated - he wasn't even going in with the banter. That was the best bit!
"Behind you." I popped up, trying to give Harry an opening to attack.
The Death Eater spun round his wand pointed straight at me.
Oh shit.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
"Ava-"
"Expelliarmus." Harry shouted. Sweat apparent on my forehead, I glared at Harry.
"How long does it take?" I exclaimed.
"Sorry!"
"He could have killed me!"
"He didn't." Harry said weakly.
"Yeah well, we'll talk about this later." I threatened.
I turned to the figure frozen at the other side of the room.
"Naylor, take the fucking mask off." I snapped. I only knew one Death Eater who was stupid enough to turn his back on the enemy. The figure hesitated. "You always were a shitty assassin - it's not hard to tell who you are. Are times so hard that they had to send you to do a real wizard's job?"
There was no reply.
I rolled my eyes. "For God's sake." I stormed over to where he stood and wrenched the mask off his face. "There. I did it. Now you don't have to worry about betraying 'Death Eater principles' or some equally shitty drivel. You always did have far too many principles." I gave him a speculative look. "Thought obviously not enough to abstain from killing your own leader."
Anger flickered on Naylor's stony face. "No more than what you did, and no less than you deserve."
"Ooh clever- who taught you that one?" I contemplated. "Zabini, right? Seems like his sort of misguided style."
"No one had to teach me- traitor. I know exactly what to do with people like you."
"People like me?" I adopted a mock-offended tone. "Aw, Potter, see what you reduced me to?"
Harry looked at me as if I were crazy. "Uh Draco don't you think that we should be . . . " he nodded towards Naylor, who was edging towards the fireplace.
"Hmm? Oh- no." I watched Naylor. "Just let him leave. The Death Eaters will punish him far more effectively than your side could. An assassin who failed his mission is as good as dead anyway."
There was a flash of green fire.
"Good riddance." I said brightly. "Truthfully, I can't even believe he left his wand - what an idiot. To think he was one of my own." I shook my head mournfully.
"Draco, the fact that your employees are totally useless aside." Harry's voice was faintly sarcastic (a new and exciting stage for him). "Shouldn't we be bothering about the fact that you're now a Death Eater target, and they know where you are?"
I shook my head unconcernedly. "Nope."
"And why not?"
"Because it'll take them at least three days to plan another attack - assuming they can even be bothered. Zabini doesn't really have all that much patience."
"I still should inform Dumbledore that-"
"Maybe later, Harry." I led him over to the sofa. "What you should do now is tell me all about your little adventure at Prison number 243111."
"How many prisons do you have?" Harry asked incredulously.
"Twelve - it just sounds more impressive with a six digit name."
Harry snorted slightly and sat down on the sofa.
I flopped down next to him and prepared to ask questions. "How did you get them out, anyway?"
"Oh- guns." Harry shrugged. "Not the thing that a load of purebloods would have been expecting."
I frowned. "They're those things that were in that film, right?"
"James Bond? Yeah they are - but mine were far less cool."
"So you just ran in there shooting people randomly."
"No." Harry looked at me as if I were mad. "I and ten people ran in there shooting people randomly."
"Ah I see." So he'd taken my advice after all. "So Sirius and Remus were okay?"
"Yeah they seemed to be. I think I'm supposed to be having dinner with them some time- should be fun. Of course *now* I'm just going to look at them and see them in bed together, which will be faintly disturbing, to say the least."
I laughed slightly. "Well I'm glad you got them back."
Harry smiled. "It was only thanks to you that I did."
"It was thanks to me that you almost lost them." I countered.
"I still got them back." he said softly.
I made a noncommittal noise and looked down. Harry broke the silence minutes later. "Can I ask you something?"
"You didn't really give me much choice there did you?" I drawled.
"Seriously." he stressed.
I sighed. "Go ahead."
He looked down at his hands a blush staining his cheeks. "That thing that happened between us at Hogwarts . . ."
I knew that was going to come back and bite me in the ass.
"Do you ever think about it?"
"No." I lied, trying not to notice his disappointed expression. "Why- do you?"
"No." he replied quickly, too quickly.
An uncomfortable silence fell between us and I shifted my weight nervously, trying to decide what to say.
"Potter it was one kiss that happened five years ago. Don't make it into something it isn't."
"And what isn't it?" he asked quietly.
Important. Special. Incredible. Meaningful.
A thousand words flashed through my mind but I couldn't use any of them.
"A big deal." I said finally after a large silence. "It wasn't a big deal. You weren't by any means the first or last person I kissed, on either side. It didn't mean anything right? It was just . . . " I struggled for words, "it was just a stupid mistake that won't be repeated."
Slightly shell-shocked he nodded numbly.
I settled back onto the sofa, trying to relax.
I kinda hoped that that was it but it seemed that it was only the tip of the iceberg. Harry wanted to talk to me about something and he was too shy or stupid or honourable to.
After a few minutes of his insufferable shuffling and fidgeting I snapped.
"Potter, why don't you just come out and ask me what you want to."
Did I really need to use the phrase 'come out'?
"What?" he looked startled.
"Ever since I got here you've been wanting to ask me something but you haven't out of fear, honour or some other equally twisted emotion. Just ask me."
For a second I thought I'd scared him into fleeing but to my surprise he stood his ground.
"Why didn't you want anything to happen?" he blurted. "Why did you run away from it?"
"Why did *I* run away from it?" I asked in disbelief. "You're the one who never bloody turned up. I waited for you for three hours and you never came. And then let's be honest- it wasn't like you ever really felt the need to talk to me again was it?"
"You're the one who never replied to my letter- what was that if not running away?"
I looked at him as if he was crazy - which in fact he probably was. "What are you talking about? What letter?"
"What letter?" he exploded incredulously. "What letter?"
Yes Potter- what letter?
"That would be the letter in which I told you how crazy I was about you. The letter in which I said that I thought about you every second of every day and had done for a really long time. The one where I said that I might be falling in lo-" he stopped suddenly, noticing my blank look. He swallowed slightly, the colour swiftly draining from his face. "You really don't know what letter?"
Mutedly I shook my head in confirmation.
"Oh." he squeaked slightly, swallowing noiselessly. "Ok. Well I'll just go and . . . " he waved his hands around, unable to think of anything, " . . . be somewhere that isn't here."
He dashed out of the room, his actions positively screaming 'oh my god I'm such a moron'.
Which - ok he was but still . . .
He was 'falling in lo-'.
Now I'm not trying to sound conceited here but there are only so many things that could mean.
I vaguely did a run through of all the words I could think of beginning with lo.
Well unless he was falling in lotion then I could probably deduce that the missing word was love.
Love.
. . . . . .
. . .
Fucking hell.
My eyes doubled in size as I thought about it.
Harry Potter was in love with me.
Black was right-that sounded wrong - so very very wrong.
I mean it would explain an awful lot but .
It just -
He couldn't -
When -
How -
Why couldn't I even fucking form a thought sentence anymore?
Other than the fact that the world could quite possibly be ending.
He couldn't love me.
I mean okay - I was fucking gorgeous and rich and powerful and witty and anybody who didn't instantly fall to their knees and worship me was a total idiot but.
Actually, why couldn't he love me?
Oh yeah . . . because we were supposed to hate each other.
But then again ,we didn't, so that excuse sucked.
Uhmm . . . I'd killed half the wizarding world?
Although he didn't actually seem to hold that against me.
He wasn't supposed to be gay?
But I wasn't exactly complaining seven years ago when he had his tongue stuck down my throat.
Wow, this was difficult.
I scrunched my face up, desperately brainstorming for ideas.
Ooh ooh I had it - the mother of all reasons.
I didn't love him and therefore did not want or deserve his love.
Having settled that I relaxed, trying to ignore the niggling feeling that somehow . . . I didn't think it was going to make a blind bit of difference.
Thanks for still reading!!!
Please review cuz they keep me going
~Cherrycola~