Recovery
Part 20
A/N: Anything in bold italic is being spoken in Italian
Erik stares at the woman who just walked into his room, wondering who she is and why they need to talk.
Legaspi: Erik, do you remember me?
Erik continues to stare at her. He squints towards her, trying to place her face. After several minutes, he relaxes in his bed and shakes his head no.
Legaspi: Erik, I'm Dr. Kim Legaspi. Does that ring a bell?
Erik concentrates but still comes up empty and again shakes his head.
Legaspi: That's alright. You and I are going to spend alot of time together--talking. By the time we are done, we will know everything about each other that we need to and even some things we don't need to know.
Legaspi pulls a chair over to Erik's bed.
Legaspi: Are you up to talking now?
Erik shrugs his shoulders but remains silent. Legaspi looks around his room trying to find someway of breaking the ice with her newest patient. Her eyes fix on Erik's nightstand. She gets up from her seat, removes something from the nightstand and returns to her seat.
Legaspi: Yours?
Erik: Pppuppy.
Legaspi: Oh, so the rumors about you being able to talk are true.
Erik reaches out to the doctor and takes his stuffed dog from her. He starts stroking the toy as if it were real.
Legaspi: What's your puppy's name?
Erik: Rrreal nnot. Ssstuffed. Nnname no.
Legaspi: There's nothing wrong with giving a toy a name. Maybe between the two of us, we can think of a name for it. Was that a present?
Erik nods his head and continues to stroke the stuffed dog's head.
Erik: Dddr. Chhin gggive mmee.
Legaspi: That was nice of her. (pause)Do you mind putting it down for now, so we can talk?
Erik frantically shook his head and tried to back away from her. She heard his heart monitor start to beep, loudly. She knew he was getting upset.
Legaspi: It's okay. You can hold on to him if you feel better. So, I hear that you've been having some bad dreams lately.
Erik: Ssssooo.
Legaspi: So, I'm here to talk to you about them and maybe I can help you stop having them. But, first you have to tell me what they're about.
Erik looks at her and nods.
Legaspi: Alright. When you have one of your dreams, what do you see?
Erik: Mmmmonster.
Legaspi: Can you describe the monster?
Erik: Nnnoo.
Legaspi: Why not?
Erik shrugs again.
Legaspi: Do you remember the dreams when you wake up?
Erik: Sssometttimess.
Legaspi: Well, when you do remember the dreams but not the monster is it because you don't know the words to use to describe it or you just can't remember what it looks like?
Erik: Fffforgot.
Legaspi thinks for a moment.
Legaspi: If you could remember the monster, would you tell me what it looked like?
Erik nods.
Legaspi: Erik, do you know what's wrong with you? Why you are in a hospital?
Erik: Ssssick.
Legaspi: That's right. Is that all? (pause)Erik, do you ever wonder why you can't do the things all the people around you can?
Erik: Mmmeee ssstupidd.
Legaspi: No, you are not. And anyone who tells you that is the stupid one. Are you in any pain?
Erik: Lllots.
Legaspi: And why do you think that is?
Erik: Hhhurt mmee.
Legaspi: That's right. Some one hurt you. (pause) That someone who hurt you is he the one you have the bad dreams about.
Erik starts to scratch his head.
Erik(shaking his head, furiously): Nnno! Nnno!
Legaspi: Alright, calm down Erik. If you can't remember your dreams, then how do you know if that it isn't the monster.
Erik: Dddon't knnnow.
Realizing that Erik is getting too rowled up, she decides to cut his initial session short.
Legaspi: I think we've had enough for today. I'm going to arrange for us to talk again. Is that okay with you, Erik?
Erik shrugs.
Legaspi: I'm not the enemy. I'm trying to help you remember who hurt you so they will never hurt you again and in the process help stop those nightmares of yours, alright?
Erik looks up into the concerned doctor's face and nods. Then Erik drifted back off to sleep again and Dr. Legaspi stared at him for several minutes before leaving his room. She went back up to her office for her next appointment.
Later that afternoon, Jing-Mei slipped up to Erik's room. He was still asleep, so she went over to his bed and held his hand. She could feel it shaking, which was always a good indication that Erik had just had a nightmare or was trapped in the middle of one now. The numbers on his machines were normal and he wasn't thrashing around so she decided to leave him sleep until she thought he was in trouble and needed her to wake him up. Her eyes started roaming the room when they landed upon an object in Erik's bed. She reached for it and held it in her arms.
Jing-Mei: Nice to see the nurse at the rehab center gave you your present. When I brought it at the supermarket, both Antonio and Rusty were fighting over who gets it. But I told them that I had it in mind for a gift for someone else. Rusty thought he looked like Rascal, just like I did. So, I knew you would love it. You could sit him right on the end of your bed and when Rascal couldn't come to visit you, then you could hold your toy.
Dr. Legaspi walked in behind Jing-Mei and tapped her on the shoulder, startling the Asian doctor.
Legaspi: Dr. Chen.
Jing-Mei: Oh, Dr. Legaspi. It's just you. You scared me.
Legaspi: Sorry.
Jing-Mei: It's alright. Have you had your little chat with Erik yet?
Legaspi: Yes. Can we talk?
Jing-Mei: Sure.
Jing-Mei got up from her seat, kissed Erik on the head and started out of the room when her beeper went off.
Jing-Mei: It's the ER. Maybe I can stop up to your office during my dinner break at about 6:30 given how busy the ER is at that time.
Legaspi: I get off at 5:00 tonight. I could drop by the ER when I get off and if you're not too busy, maybe you could sneak away and we can talk in the lounge.
Jing-Mei: I can try to but Dr. Weaver is on tonight. She may not let me go on an unauthorized break.
Legaspi: Don't worry about Ker..uh, Dr. Weaver and I can handle her.
Jing-Mei: I don't want to keep you after you get off or take you out of your way.
Legaspi: That's alright. I have business down in the ER that I have to take care of.
Jing-Mei left and headed down to the ER. Shortly before 6pm, Jing-Mei exited sutures when she saw Dr. Legaspi and Kerry speaking near the lounge door. She walked over to the two doctors and interrupted just when it was getting personal.
Jing-Mei: Uh um... Dr. Legaspi. I have a couple of minutes now to talk.
Dr. Legaspi: Right. Let's go into the lounge.
Jing-Mei: Is it okay, Dr. Weaver?
Kerry: Sure. We'll call you if it gets busy.
Kerry headed over to the board while Jing-Mei and Dr. Legaspi went into the lounge where they saw Mark, Carter and Abby sitting.
Dr. Legaspi: Oh, I didn't realize how popular this place is.
Mark: Did you want to talk some place?
The trio stands up and prepares to leave when Jing-Mei interrupts.
Jing-Mei: Don't cut your break short because of me? I don't mind if you stay, alright Dr. Legaspi.
Dr. Legaspi: It's alright with me. Please sit down, Dr. Chen.
Carter and Mark stand up and pull out chairs for Jing-Mei and Dr. Legaspi.
Jing-Mei: Well what do you think, Dr. Legaspi? Will you take Erik on as a patient?
Dr. Legaspi: Yes I will. But, it's going to be a challenge.
Abby: What do mean "challenge"?
Dr. Legaspi: I had a talk with Erik and just in that few minutes I could tell that there is a whole long story behind his problems.
Carter: No kidding.
Dr. Legaspi: What I mean is that Erik, despite what it looks like, wants to talk about what's going on inside his head but every time he tries to something prevents him.
Carter: Like what?
Dr. Legaspi: Fear mostly. But I think he's blocked most of his past out. It's still inside his head but he's not able to reach it---not conscious anyway.
Jing-Mei: That's why he has the nightmares.
Dr. Legaspi: That's right. You guys know that when we sleep, our minds go places where they would never go while we are awake. We dream all sort of things and can even remember better when we're asleep.
Mark: That's because when we sleep and dream we use another part of our brain.
Jing-Mei: Yeah, but Erik has brain damage. What if that part of his brain that controls the dreaming is damaged?
Dr. Legaspi: There's no way of knowing that. Unless...
Jing-Mei: Unless what? Do you have a plan?
Dr. Legaspi: Yeah, maybe. You know I think the best chance we have of getting through to Erik and getting any information from him is to do it while he's asleep.
The other three doctors and nurse look at her wondering what her strategy is.
Dr. Legaspi: Dr. Chen, I want to hypnotize Erik.
Their mouths drop.
Carter: You are going to hypnotize Mal...Erik?
Dr. Legaspi: I think that's our best shot at helping him. What do you think, Dr. Chen?
Jing-Mei: If it helps Erik and stops his nightmares, then do it.
Dr. Legaspi: Now, we just have to get Erik's consent to do it.
Mark: What if he doesn't agree to it?
Dr. Legaspi: Then I'm afraid that hypnosis will never work without his cooperation.(pause) Medicine can do today what it couldn't do 10 years ago, hell what it couldn't do 1 year ago, but we still need the same thing that we always needed: the patient on our side. Hypnosis is the same way. The patient has to agree to let us in.(pause) Erik isn't willing to do that right now on his own, maybe in time we can change that. So I think that this might be the only way.(pause) Erik's defensives are too strong. We have to break through that tough exterior. Whatever happened in Erik's past was so horrible that he placed it in the back of his brain that he himself couldn't get to, and he did the same thing with what happened to him at the hangar.(pause) In other words, he's blocked it out but there's still a part of him that feels incomplete: like something's missing and that's what's lead to the tortured soul you know as Dr. Dave, uh I mean Erik. He's built this mental wall or barrier around to protect himself and keep the rest of us out. It's his defense mechanism. We aren't going to be able to find out what's wrong with Erik until he's ready. What we have to do is penetrate that wall and break down those defenses in a way to make Erik relax and gain his trust because that is the only way this is going to work. We have to make Erik feel safe, confident and at ease so he can trust us and let us in and in return we have to reassure him that if he does open up that we won't use what we find out against him to harm him. Only then will the hypnosis work.(pause) But I'm afraid once we do get through the surface and touch what is really going on inside him we are going to find a very different(whispering) Dr. Dave Malucci. We'll going to see a very hurt, scared, angry, very physically, emotionally and mentally traumatized little boy.(pause) The problem is we are skating on thin ice here, you know opening a Pandora's box. Remember, we will be digging into memories that Erik had suppressed his entire life, once he starts bringing them forward and facing them he's going to have to learn to deal with them. I'm very worried about what we might find when we get inside. We have to take this a little bit at a time, it's got to be baby steps for Erik. If we go too fast, and Erik isn't ready to handle this we're liable to scare him off, back into withdrawal and never get the opportunity to get close to him again. Besides, with Erik's heart condition I don't want to put too much pressure on him physically.
Mark: I agree. Have you spoken with Erik about these sessions?
Legaspi: Not yet. I had an appointment with another patient but I plan to go up and visit with him again.
Jing-Mei: If you don't mind Dr. Legaspi, I'd like to speak with him first. No offense, but he might concede easier if it came from me instead of a perfect stranger.
Legaspi: No offense taken. You're right. Erik is more likely to agree if he is asked by someone he knows and trusts then someone he just saw for the first time---at least in his mind.
Kerry enters the lounge.
Kerry: Alright everyone, out. We have multiple kids coming in.
Carter: What's going on, Dr. Weaver?
Kerry: Possible food poisoning at a birthday party.
The doctors and nurse spring to their feet and head out to the ER to resume their duties.
Once all the kids are taken care of and either sent upstairs or home, Jing-Mei went back to the board and looked for her next patient.
Jing-Mei: What do we have here?
Kerry: Bounce back from the other day. Newly diagnosed 62 year old male with acid reflux disease. I saw him the other day.
Jing-Mei: I'll take him this time.
Jing-Mei takes the chart and walks into the waiting room to get her patient.
Jing-Mei: Vincent Malta!!
A tall husky bearded man stood up and went towards the Asian doctor who called his name.
Jing-Mei: This way Mr. Malta.
The man followed her into exam 2. He sat down on the table. As Jing-Mei turned her back on him to close the curtain, he let out a big grin that he quickly hid when she faced him again.
Jing-Mei: Alright, what seems to be the problem, Mr. Malta?
Vincent: I was at work when I started to get these bad chest pains.
Jing-Mei: It says that you were here recently and diagnosed with acid reflux disease. Could that be the same problem that you're having now?
Vincent: Pains feel the same but stronger and closer to my heart.
Jing-Mei: Alright, Dr. Weaver wrote you a prescription for Prevacid for you. Is that working?
Vincent: For a while and then an hour later, the pains are back.
Jing-Mei: What do the pains feel like?
Vincent: Like a knife being constantly pushed into my chest.
Jing-Mei: Let me listen to your heart? Take a deep breath. (pause) Okay, heart sounds okay. I'm going to get a chest x-ray and an EKG. Wait one moment while I get the machine. Just lay back and try to relax for now.
Jing-Mei pulls the curtain open and is met by Haleh.
Jing-Mei: God, Haleh! You scared the life out of me.
Haleh: Sorry, Dr. Chen. But you have some visitors at the admit desk.
Jing-Mei: Really? Who?
Haleh: Your children and their sitter.
Vincent, overhearing what Haleh said, immediately jumped up from the table and went into the hallway, just outside exam 2 and watched as the two ladies went down to the admit desk and met with Mrs. Peterson and the boys. A bigger grin grew across his face.
Vincent(to himself): Finally, I get a good look at my grandsons---the heirs to the family business.
Down at the admit desk, Jing-Mei confronts her visitors.
Jing-Mei: What are you guys doing here? The baby, is he alright?
Mrs. Peterson: He's fine. It's the big guy here. He's not feeling too well.
Jing-Mei knelt down to look at Rusty in the eyes. He was pale and he didn't seem to have his usual carefree Malucci luster in his eyes. She instantly pulled her dictionary out of her pocket.
Jing-Mei: Hey pal, what's wrong?
Rusty(hoarsely): My throat hurts real bad, Mama Jing.
Jing-Mei placed her hand on his forehead and all of a sudden became a doctor and not a mom.
Jing-Mei: You do feel hot. When did this come on?
Mrs. Peterson: Just a little while ago. I took his temperature at the house. It was 101.4 degrees. So I thought I had better bring him in? Sorry to disturb you at work.
Jing-Mei: Don't be. You did the right thing. Is Cleo available?
Lydia: I think she's in the lounge with Dr. Benton?
Jing-Mei: Could you get her for me?
Lydia enters the lounge and within a few minutes comes out with Cleo behind her.
Jing-Mei: Cleo, I know you are on your break but could you take a quick look at Rusty here. He's got a fever and a really sore throat.
Cleo: Sure, no problem. Come on Rusty, let's go this way.
Jing-Mei: Go ahead Rusty. It's okay. I'll be right down the hall and Cleo won't hurt you.
Rusty hugged Jing-Mei and then went with Cleo into exam 1. She took Chuny in with her since she spoke Spanish and that was as close to Italian as an interpreter they could get.
Lydia: He's in excellent hands. He'll be fine, Dr Chen.
Jing-Mei: I know he is and he'll be okay. That's not what's bothering me.
Lydia: What's wrong then?
Jing-Mei: My current patient that I'm working on now.
Lydia(confused): Mr. Malta? What about him?
Jing-Mei: I can't help but swear that I saw him somewhere before.
To be continued. Please read and review.