Recovery
Part 24
A/N: Anything in bold italic is being spoken in Italian
Carter takes a big gulp and looks closer at the picture.
Carter: Are you sure, Deb?
Jing-Mei: Positive. See(pointing to the little girl in the background) that's Sophie.
Carter: Remember Dave has or had an identical twin. Maybe that was Nicholas.
Jing-Mei: Couldn't be. Mr. Santini said that Nicholas died when he was only two years old and before Sophie was born.
Carter: That's right. I forgot. God, Rusty is a carbon-copy of Dave---just a little older.
Curious, Jing-Mei removes the picture from the album and flips it over. She sees what she was looking for.
Jing-Mei: According to the date on the back of the photo, Dave was seven at the time the picture was taken.
Kerry: He's so small. I would swear that he wasn't a day over four.
Jing-Mei: Mr. Santini said that Dave was small for his age. It probably has a lot to do with the way he was raised.
Legaspi: Speaking of which, it's time I had a chat with my new patient.
Kerry and Carter took the hint and left Erik's room. Jing-Mei, temporarily excused herself so she could go and check on her son. Meanwhile, Dr. Legaspi and Erik started to talk. She agreed to wait until Jing-Mei came back before she put Erik under hypnosis for the first time.
Jing-Mei went down to pediatrics and into Rusty's room. He was just coming out of the anesthetic. She approached him.
Jing-Mei: Hi sweetheart. How do you feel?
Rusty looks weary-eyed at his mama and grabs his throat. He attempts to speak before Jing-Mei shushes him by putting her finger to her lips.
Jing-Mei: Shhhhhh! You can't speak baby. Not for a few days, anyway or you'll hurt your voice.
She walked over to the nightstand and found a pad and pencil and handed them to Rusty.
Jing-Mei: If you need to say something, write it down.
Rusty thinks for a moment and then scribbles something on his pad.
Rusty: When do I get my ice cream?
Jing-Mei lets out a small laugh.
Jing-Mei: Is that what you've been thinking about this whole time?
Rusty nods.
Jing-Mei: Well, I'll speak with your nurses and see what I can do.
Rusty smiles and gives Jing-Mei the okay signal with his hand. She sits down on his bed and strokes his head.
Jing-Mei: Do you feel up to talking a little or should I say writing?
Rusty: About what?
Jing-Mei: About that nightmare you had the other night.
Rusty shrugs.
Jing-Mei: You are sure that one of the little boys is you?
Rusty: Yes, Mama Jing.
Jing-Mei: What about the other little boy? Is he someone from your class?
Rusty: No, Mama Jing.
Jing-Mei: Can you describe him to me?
Rusty: He was almost my size (pause)no, he was bigger than me. He was the same age though.
Jing-Mei: You did say his name was Nicholas, right?
Rusty: Yes, Mama Jing.
Jing-Mei: What happened in the dream?
Rusty: Me and Nic...uh(having trouble spelling the name)Nic were lying on the floor. He was crying and flipping around. I was scared. Monster came to the bars and smiled at us. He said that we got what was coming to us. (pause) Please Mama Jing, I don't want to talk about it anymore.
Seeing the little boy's hand shaking as he writes, Jing-Mei knows that he is still scared and by pursuing this matter, she could seriously damage Rusty emotionally. She stops at Rusty's pleas.
Jing-Mei: I'm sorry baby. I shouldn't have questioned you so soon after surgery. (pause) Listen, why don't you go back to sleep for awhile and when you wake up I'll see to it that you have all the ice cream you want, okay.
Rusty smiles at her and reaches out to give her a hug. Jing-Mei hugs him back, then removes the pad and paper from his hand and puts it on his nightstand.
Jing-Mei: See you later, baby. Think happy dreams this time.
Jing-Mei leaves Rusty's room and confronts the on-duty nurse to arrange for Rusty to have plenty of vanilla ice cream brought to him when he wakes up. She heads back up to the sixth floor to join Erik and Dr. Legaspi during their session.
Back upstairs with Erik, Dr. Legaspi is sitting across from Erik who is in a wheelchair. Jing-Mei, quietly slips into the room so not to disturb her husband and his shrink. Dr. Legaspi sees her and Jing-Mei nods her head indicating that she's ready to begin with the rest of Erik's session.
Dr. Legapsi: Alright Erik, now I need you to concentrate on my voice and nothing else.
Dr. Legaspi notices that Erik is distracted by the lights so she gets up and turns them off. She sits back down and continues.
Dr. Legaspi: That's better. Erik, can you see this pin?
Erik: Yyyyes.
Dr. Legaspi: Focus on the shiny pin in front of you. Listen to my voice and just stare at the pin.
Erik does exactly as he is instructed and stares at the pin. His head is starting to droop. He pulls it back up.
Legaspi: No, no Erik. That's alright. Let your head fall. I need for you to relax every muscle in your body.
Erik gets extremely drowsy and continues to fight, but after over three minutes, he is no longer able to stay awake and succumbs to his sleepiness. Dr. Legaspi rolls her chair back when Jing-Mei signals her.
Jing-Mei(whispering): That was quick. I thought it would take longer for him to go under.
Dr. Legaspi(whispering): His defenses are down. He's still a very sick young man. He may not show it, but he knows exactly what we're doing and a small part of him doesn't want us to invade that part of his life.
Jing-Mei(whispering): Then why did he submit so easily?
Dr. Legaspi(whispering): Because another part of him wants us to help him and I think, that part of him is bigger than the part that doesn't want our interference.
Erik starts to groan.
Dr. Legaspi: Let me get back to my patient.
Dr. Legaspi rolls back over to Erik. She tries to hold his hand to soothe him but he pulls away.
Dr. Legaspi: I forgot you don't like to be touched. Alright Erik, you can hear me okay, can't you?
Erik nods.
Dr. Legaspi: Okay, now I need you to take us back to the day you borrowed Dr. Carter's car.
Erik: Ccccan't.
Dr. Legaspi: Sure you can. Just think about the day. Think really hard.
Erik squeezed his eyes tightly and then started shaking his head. He remains silent.
Dr. Legaspi: Erik, you do remember that day, don't you?
Beads of sweat start forming on Erik's forehead and he grabs the arms of his wheelchair securely until his fingers lost their tanned color and turned red.
Jing-Mei sees Erik getting upset but she refrains from interfering, knowing if she does that Erik could regress even deeper. Against her better judgment, she bites her tongue and remains seated.
Dr. Legaspi: Alright Erik, just relax. It's okay. Let's see if we can approach this from a different angle. Erik, do you remember the way you use to be before you got sick?
Erik shakes his head as he relaxes his hands and lays them on his lap.
Dr. Legaspi: Do you remember what kind of work you did before you became sick?
Erik: Ddddoctor, mmmmeee.
Dr. Legaspi: Very good, Erik. Did someone tell you that or did you remember it?
Erik: Cccchin mmmee dddddr. tooold.
Dr. Legaspi: Oh, Dr. Chen told you.
Erik nods.
Dr. Legaspi: Erik, do you know that Erik isn't your real name?
Erik: Yyyyyes.
Dr. Legaspi: Do you remember your real name?
Erik thinks for a moment and starts to speak.
Erik: Nnnnic....
Both Jing-Mei and Dr. Legaspi jumped up in their seats and exchanged looks. Erik starts scratching roughly at his head and becoming extremely agitated.
Dr. Legaspi: Alright, I think that's enough for our first session. Okay Erik, I'll bring you out of it now. Concentrate on my voice and let it lead you out of your deep sleep.
Erik resists. Both doctors notice Erik's sudden frantic condition
Dr. Legaspi: It's alright Erik, you'll be safe out here. I promise you. It's okay to wake up now. You won't remember a thing that we talked about.
Erik started to come out of his slumber when Dr. Legaspi turned on the lights and startled him the rest of the way. Jing-Mei walked over and comforted her husband. She kissed his head and he let his eyes roam the room, trying to figure out what was going on.
Jing-Mei wheeled Erik over to his bed and between her and Dr. Legaspi they managed, after several attempts, to get Erik tucked back in his bed. Dr. Legaspi exits the room to give them some time together. Jing-Mei handed Erik his stuffed dog and waited for him to fall back to sleep before she left the room.
She went down to the ER to check her schedule when she ran into Dr. Legaspi who was talking with Kerry.
Jing-Mei(thinking to herself): God, she spends alot of time with Kerry. None of my business. Gossip is Abby's racket.
She approaches the psychiatrist and subtly interrupts them by clearing her throat.
Jing-Mei: I don't mean to interrupt but what did you think about Erik, Dr. Legaspi?
Dr. Legaspi: Well, he's really blocked. He's not ready to let us in yet. It's going to take some time.
Dr. Legaspi's statement attracts other ER staffers.
Dr. Legaspi: I don't think we are going to get anywhere if we start from that very day. We have to go back further.
Jing-Mei: How much further?
Dr. Legaspi: As far back as we have to. Probably way back into his childhood.
Carter: Uh oh.
Jing-Mei: Is that necessary?
Dr. Legaspi: Afraid so. We have to know the source of Erik's problems before we can help him.
Kerry: I think we know the source.
Dr. Legaspi: Yeah. From the talks that Erik and I have had, his badly scarred body, his mental and emotional status, his medical records, his gestures and eye contact or lack of it and from what Dr. Chen has told me about his past, in my professional opinion, I think we are extremely lucky that that poor boy hasn't split identities a long time ago.
Carter: Really? He's that disturbed.
Dr. Legaspi: Not disturbed. Traumatized.
Luka: Dr. Legaspi, this splitting identities---that could still happen, right?
Dr. Legaspi: Absolutely, if we aren't careful about how we handle him and deal with his situation.
Jing-Mei: Maybe it already has happened, in a way.
Kerry: What do you mean, Jing-Mei?
Jing-Mei: This is probably nothing, but, before Erik's attack---he use to be this extremely annoying, self-assured, big-shot, know-it-all doctor who acted like an arrogant jerk with an over-developed sex gland.
Carter: So? We all know that.
Jing-Mei: That's just it. When we started going together, he was nothing like that. At least not when we were together---just the two of us. Ironically, I found him to be this sincere, sensitive, gentle, loving but aching young man. Don't laugh. It's true. It was in his eyes.
Haleh: I have to agree there. There's not much I can say about him---I mean he was extremely handsome---but his eyes are positively gorgeous.
Jing-Mei: Right. They say that the eyes are the windows to the soul so when I took the time and looked into his eyes, I saw an innocence in them. I never noticed it before but his eyes always had a certain sadness about them.
Dr. Legaspi: It's obvious that macho-jerk image he showed everyone here was to cover up an obviously hurting and scared little boy inside.
Jing-Mei: I guess he thought that if he showed that side of himself, he would think that everyone thought that he was weak. Erik was raised to believe that men aren't sensitive, have no feelings and don't cry.
Haleh: Typical male bullshit.
Jing-Mei: Dr. Legaspi, I don't understand one thing, though. I thought once Erik went under the hypnosis, his speech would improve, but it hasn't. He still stutters. He still has aphasia.
Dr. Legaspi: It probably would have been better if it was caused by his psychological problems, but it's not. Erik's speech impediments are caused by a physical brain injury that he may or may not ever get over.
Jing-Mei: He will. One day, we are going to see the old Da..Erik walk through those hospital doors and never believe that he was once almost on the verge of death. You'll see.
Dr. Legaspi: Well, before we do that we have to get his mental problems out in the open so he can deal with them.
Jing-Mei: Then why did you tell him not to remember any of his session while he was hypnotized?
Dr. Legaspi: Because right now, I don't think Erik is strong--physically, emotionally or mentally to handle those memories in a conscious state. He can barely cope with them when he's unconscious. I think that for our next session I will take him back as far as he will allow.
Jing-Mei: Do you think you will be able to really help him, Dr. Legaspi?
Dr. Legaspi: There are no guarantees, but Erik does seem very susceptible to the hypnosis and I guess only time will tell. (pause) Dr. Chen, if you sit with him again, I advise you not to mention our session to him.
Jing-Mei: I won't. As a matter of fact, I just came down long enough to check my schedule for next week and then I want to go up and visit Rusty.
Jing-Mei gets her work schedule and heads up to pediatrics when she gets an idea. She rides the elevator up to the sixth floor and enters Erik's room. Dr. Romano is examining Erik so she just quietly tiptoes in and takes his photo album out with her. She gets back on the elevator and off it on the pediatrics floor. She goes in Rusty's room and sees him sitting up eating his ice cream. She smiles at him and he returns it. She goes over to her little boy and sits on a chair by his bed.
Jing-Mei: How are you doing, big guy? Like the ice cream?
Rusty reaches for his pad and pen and writes.
Rusty: Throat still hurts, Mama Jing.
Jing-Mei: I told you it will for awhile. Is the ice cream helping at all?
Rusty: Si. Gracia, Mama Jing. But...
Jing-Mei: But what, Rusty?
Rusty: They are trying to make me eat soup too and strained vegitibles (vegetables), just like 'Tonio eats.
Jing-Mei tries to suppress a small giggle, but fails.
Jing-Mei: Sorry pal, I knew if I told you that, you would have never agreed to the surgery.
Jing-Mei sits by and lets the little boy finish his ice cream up.
Jing-Mei: Done?
Rusty pushes his bowl to Jing-Mei and gets his pad and pen.
Rusty: More.
Jing-Mei: We'll see later. But first I need to ask you a question about your nightmare?
Rusty starts to squirm in his bed, not wanting to talk about that again.
Jing-Mei: I know it upsets you and I won't pressure you but I just need to know one thing and then I'll back off, okay?
Rusty: Then I get more ice cream?
Jing-Mei nods and Rusty agrees. She pulls Erik's photo album up to him and opens it. Then she points at a picture.
Jing-Mei: Rusty, do you know who that is?
Rusty nods.
Jing-Mei: Have you seen him before?
Rusty: Lots of time.
Jing-Mei: Alright, we're getting somewhere here, now? Rusty, what's his name?
Rusty: Rascal.
Jing-Mei's face drops and she looks at the picture she is pointing at and it is indeed a picture of the dog. She clenches her teeth, embarrassed.
Jing-Mei: Sorry, wrong picture.
She skims through the album until she sees the picture of seven year old Dave and his sister, Sophie, in the background.
Jing-Mei: Rusty, look at this picture. Now, the little boy. Do you know him?
Rusty barely glances at the picture but a scared look comes over his face and he drops the album on his bed and grabs his pad and pen.
Jing-Mei: So, you do know him. Rusty, I need to know---who is he?
Rusty: It's me...or Nic.
To be continued. Please read and review.