(Meaningless Trysts)
At first they pretended nothing had happened. More precisely, they didn't say anything that would acknowledge or discount the encounter. With some amusement Seto noticed that they fought fiercer the next day, and Jounouchi's temper was easier to kindle. The second day in Yuugi and Jounouchi's apartment was actually very interesting, with Jounouchi finding a new reason to snap at Seto every five minutes.
The second night it happened again, and once again they retired to sleep without a word to each other, and spent the third day bickering. It got so serious that at one point Yuugi had been forced to take Jounouchi out.
The third night they had finally took the initiative and said something. "Why does this keep happening?" Seto demanded from where he was lying. "Are you that much of a slut?"
"Fuck you," Jounouchi said absently. "It's all about sex; I don't know about you, but I haven't gotten any in a while."
"Hmph." Seto wasn't going to answer that.
Jounouchi continued, "Maybe we should just… make this a habit. Nothing serious, not like a relationship: no one in his right mind would want a relationship with you. It's just… relief."
Seto didn't like the idea; it was far too casual for his tastes. But at the same time, that relationship thing… Seto didn't want another relationship. Sex without strings was tempting, even if it was with the mutt. At least he had a nice body, and knew how to give in. "Fine," he said roughly.
After that it turned into a routine between them: when one beckoned, the other followed. At first it had been easy to go at it unnoticed, during that first week when Seto and Jounouchi had shared a room. However, after that Seto and Mokuba returned home, and it was a little more complicated than just waiting until everyone was in bed. It became so methodical that it was disturbingly comical. Sometimes Seto would call; he wouldn't speak, but Jounouchi always knew when it was him. Within half an hour Jounouchi would be in his bed, and usually within another forty-five minutes he would be gone again, back to what he had been doing.
And sometimes Jounouchi called Seto's cell phone, and he in turn was silent. Seto would say something - usually something that would both make it seem as though he had received a real phone call and tell Jounouchi where he was - and Jounouchi would find him; more than enough times he'd found himself in Seto's office at Kaiba Corp., and at least once he'd had to hide in the closet during an unexpected meeting.
There were no delusions between them; they never pretended. They weren't friends, weren't lovers… hell, Jounouchi wouldn't even have said that they were acquaintances if someone had asked. They still fought vehemently as ever outside of bed; Jounouchi still thought that Seto was a pompous jackass, and Seto made it clear he thought Jounouchi was an imbecile.
The only thing they liked about each other was sex.
That was Jounouchi's story… and he was sticking to it.
"Jou," Yuugi jarred Jounouchi from his thoughts. Jounouchi hadn't even noticed that his friend had come home from work. He struggled to sit up on the couch, making room for the smaller male to sit. Yuugi took the unspoken invitation. "We should talk."
"About what?" Jou asked, stretching his feet out onto the floor. The situation felt strangely paternal; Yuugi had a way of saying things that made Jounouchi feel like he was being question by a father figure.
"What's going on with you and Kaiba?"
"Nothing." The answer was too sudden, too forced.
"You're lying, Jou; he calls all the time, I can see on the caller ID. And you leave more often." Yuugi smiled slyly. "You two are together, huh? Romantic trysts…"
"No, Yuugi, it's not…" Jounouchi was saddened by Yuugi's naiveté; he didn't want to admit that it was just casual sex, if not for his own interests then just for Yuugi's ideals. "Just… don't tell anyone. Not even Mokuba." It wouldn't hurt to let Yuugi believe what he wanted, just once.
Yuugi was nodding. "Not a soul." Grinning and apparently satisfied with what he had learned he stood, leaving Jounouchi and going into his room. Jounouchi sighed… Damn. Sex didn't solve anything, but it was a great distraction. Maybe he was a little addicted to it, addicted to-
He didn't care to finish that thought. He was just about to go find the phone when Yuugi's bedroom door opened again. He turned to see Yuugi. No, wait… Jounouchi checked the stature, the way he held himself… He was looking at Yami.
"Hi," he said, settling back onto the couch. He never saw Yami for long; the spirit was either leaving or just stretching. It would be nice to have a chat with him.
"Now we need to talk," Yami said softly, and Jounouchi stared. Yami wasn't big on giving talks, at least not as much as he used to, and that tone… Mutely Jounouchi nodded, watching as Yami sat on the couch beside him. There was silence between them before Yami finally pleaded, "Don't hurt him." The tone of his voice was softer than usual, and it was enough to make Jounouchi's heart ache.
Back that thought up. Why was Yami begging on Seto's behalf? "I'm not in a position to hurt him," Jounouchi admitted. "We just have sex to do it."
Yami shook his head. "True now, maybe, but it won't last. Once you know him - really know him - you won't be able to stay indifferent to him." Yami was staring at him thoughtfully and he smiled sadly, touching Jounouchi's shoulder. "But I think you already know that."
Jounouchi turned away, his head bowed to look at his knees. He was uncomfortable under Yami's scrutiny. He hated how Yami did that, how Yami just stared and seemed to know exactly what someone was thinking, like he could see their mind, their heart, their soul.
Damn it, he didn't want to talk about it… but if he ever intended to say anything, Yami would be the person to spill it to. "I don't mean to give a damn about him." Jounouchi sounded like a guilty child. "I'm supposed to hate him… no, I do hate him." His voice was falsely firm, and even he could tell that he was trying to convince himself. "This is all about sex."
Sagely Yami replied, "Maybe you did hate him; I'd be the first person to agree with that. The problem with hate is that it requires passion equal to love. If you change how you channel that passion, you change the emotion." Yami stood slowly. "Perhaps he should be warned not to hurt you." With those pensive words Yami left Jounouchi alone.
Jounouchi sat up immediately. He needed to see Seto.
He didn't bother calling.
Seto looked up in surprise as Jounouchi walked into his office at Kaiba Corp. "You should have called," Seto said. "As it is, I'm busy right now with-"
"Why is Yami telling me to spare your feelings?" Jounouchi demanded. Seto stared, paperwork on his desk forgotten. Yami had done what?
"How did Yami find out in the first place?"
"Yuugi put two and two together; what Yuugi knows, Yami knows." Jounouchi was explaining it as though Seto didn't know that… then again, Seto supposed that to the best of Jounouchi's knowledge he DIDN'T know. "Next thing I know, I'm getting advice from Yami."
Seto retorted stiffly, "It doesn't matter." He watched Jounouchi's expression: Jounouchi didn't look convinced. In fact, he looked like he was working on an argument… Seto stood, crossing the office to lock his office door.
"I'm not here for sex," Jounouchi said softly.
"Sure you are," Seto said, returning to Jounouchi, nudging him towards the desk; Jounouchi didn't resist, let himself be backed against the desk. "Why else would you be here? It's all we're good for." His lips lowered to the skin of Jounouchi's neck, and Jounouchi was losing his resolve; he head tilted his head back to give Seto more room.
"I hate you," he sighed, his voice the embodiment of lazy pleasure.
Seto laughed sardonically. "And melting under my touch is such a concise way to show hatred." To make his point he reached down, caressing Jounouchi through his pants. Jounouchi groaned.
"I mean it. I can't stand you." But even as he spoke he was the one giving in, pliable and pleased as Seto undid his jeans. "You're like… ah!… I just… hate you…" Seto grinned against his neck; Jounouchi was easily deterred by sex. That much he had learned in the past weeks.
"You don't have to like me. That's the great thing about our arrangement."
Jounouchi stiffened and pushed Seto away. "Arrangement," he said, near bewilderment, his lips curving around the word as though it was strange to him. And he looked at Seto with a hardened glare. "This is ridiculous; I'm no whore. Fuck you. Don't call me anymore."
"You're the one who came here." Seto was annoyed. "In fact, if memory serves this whole fiasco of sex for sex's sake was your idea."
Jounouchi growled, "Yea, well, it was stupid, and this is the last time. Got it?" He stormed out of the office, and Seto grinned with cruel amusement as he wondered if Jounouchi had thought to zip up his pants yet. And then, once the humor of that mental image passed, he sat at his desk, and he fumed.
Damn it! The whole point of what he had with Jounouchi was to distract him from… He paused, the thought half-formed in his head.
This felt startlingly familiar.
He felt as though he'd hit a form of enlightenment. That was exactly why he had taken Yami to bed: to try to distract him from Mokuba. It disturbed him, finding a parallel in the two relationships. He harbored nothing but a malicious indifference towards Jounouchi on a good day, but he loved Yami even at his worst. Still, he found it strange. He had never realized that he was the sort to seek distraction rather than solution when it came to personal relationships. He would have to change that.
So, Jounouchi hated him, huh? Well, he wasn't alone there. That could be his first matter to changing: resolving that little issue with Jounouchi.
Jounouchi was talking animatedly with Mokuba and Yuugi when the door to their apartment opened. Mokuba gawked to see his brother standing there, glaring at Jounouchi.
"When did you start just walking in here like you own the place?" Jounouchi asked coldly. Seto stood his ground, staring; Jounouchi matched it with a glare of his own. Yuugi tried to discreetly drag Mokuba into the bedroom; Mokuba refused to move, watching his friend and his brother without hiding his interest.
Seto was crossing the room, standing just in front of Jounouchi's chair. He pulled the blond to standing position. Jounouchi allowed it, but not without a look of contempt. And then Seto was talking. "You hate me, right?"
"Right." He said it like it was nothing, stating it like a textbook fact.
Seto seethed, "You hate me because you're hopeless. You hate me because you hate what you've become in my arms. You don't want to be a slut. You want someone to hold you." Seto's arms wrapped around Jounouchi's waist, pulling him close. Jounouchi's eyes widened in surprise and confusion. "You want someone to kiss you, to love you; you want it so desperately that you don't care who you get it from." Jounouchi's breath hitched as Seto leaned nearer, so close that his breath touched Jounouchi's face. "But you won't get it from me," he hissed. "Because I hate you."
"Do you?" Jounouchi realized he sounded as odd as he felt, and he didn't particularly care; the whole situation was completely off. "I think you want for those things just like I do." There, he admitted it. He wanted love, but what Seto didn't understand was that it wasn't just for the sake of having it. For some reason he couldn't quite understand, he wanted it from Seto. Maybe it was the sex, or maybe he was something of a masochist. Or maybe there was something deeper, something that he was missing, hidden just below the surface where Jounouchi couldn't see.
"No; I could give a damn less about love. It's a waste of time. I hate you just like you hate me."
Jounouchi stared. "Is that right?" Ha! That really shouldn't have been so funny. "You want more from me than my body," he mocked. He was unwavering; it was up to Seto to close the space between them. They had never kissed… Jounouchi saw confusion flash in Seto's face before that icy look prevailed and he shoved Jounouchi back into his seat.
"Don't be a fool." He turned and left as suddenly as he had entered. And Jounouchi smiled. He was right. Now all that was left was for Seto to realize that…
"What was THAT all about?" Mokuba was demanding. "Jou, are you and my brother involved?"
Jounouchi looked at Mokuba slowly. What was that word Yuugi has used…? "No, we just have a series of… hm, meaningless trysts."
- author thoughts… -
that 'I hate you' scene of Jou's was stuck in my head forever; it's probably why they have such a *cough*fucked-up*cough* relationship… if you would even call it a relationship.
I suppose I might have gone into the whole process of Jounouchi caring about Seto… but in all honesty I don't think there would be much to tell: it was all easily summarized in a paragraph. I don't think there was any depth to it.
And damn! I'm in love with Yami's line about passion and hate.